The Darkness and the Light
One
He felt a shift in the force as the blade slipped under his jaw and down his neck, the razor's edge nicking the pale flesh there as his body tensed. A bead of bright ruby blood bloomed until it trickled down the length of his neck. His dark eyes locked on hers, which were startled at the sudden sight of Ben Solo.
"You rejected me." / "You're bleeding," they said simultaneously, dark and light eyes searching one another intently, as if there were some hidden answers beneath the surface.
He could feel the warm trail of blood rolling down his neck and seeping into the onyx uniform he wore, but he didn't care. Only the concern in her eyes moved him to grab the towel and swipe at the wound, white lather and crimson blood swirling and mixing until there was only a faint reminder of what had been. The wound stung as he tossed the towel blindly at the floor, and he drew strength from the pain it caused, as he had done his entire life.
"You abandoned me," he said again flatly, turning away from the mirror and dressing table and taking a long stride toward her.
"Ben, I-"
"Don't call me that," he whispered darkly. "Ben Solo is dead along with Han Solo and Luke Skywalker."
Tears filled the girl's eyes, and for a moment, Kylo Ren felt a catch in his chest, a throbbing ache for his father and uncle, for the Jedi girl with trembling lips before him.
"There's still conflict in you, I can feel it so strongly. Ben, it's not too late, there's still a chance," Rey took a step closer to him, her hands hovering over his. "You don't have to choose this path."
"And which path would you have me choose? The way of those who abandoned me, who tried to kill me?" His jaw tensed, and he found his bare fingers drifting closer to the girl's.
Rey remained silent, her eyes searching for something she was unsure she would find.
"We had a chance to start over," he murmured, his eyes rocketing back and forth from her face to their hands, inches apart. "You chose wrongly."
"So did you," she said steadily, squaring her shoulders.
"What a bold thing you are," his lips twitched, air from his lungs spilling onto her neck.
She blinked for a moment, resolution hardening in her eyes, before taking hold of his hand and catching his holstered lightsaber up in their combined grasp. They both shuddered as the force coursed through and around them. Light, dark, peace, and chaos warred, fighting for purchase as she held onto his hand.
"Do it, if it's what you want," her voice trembled. "Kill the last Jedi and be done."
His eyes widened, jaw clenching roughly as her lithe fingers pressed against his. Her fingers rolled dangerously close to the trigger, and there was no hesitation. He flung the weapon from their grasp, pushing her out of the way so suddenly that she nearly lost her balance.
"Are you insane?" he rattled, his hands shook almost imperceptibly.
"I knew it," she breathed softly, her hands clutching at her heart, as if to slow it's violent beating. "You don't want to kill me any more than I want to kill you."
Kylo Ren turned from her sharply, his long pale fingers snaking through his jet hair, light and dark, ruffling it beyond repair. His voice was slight as he spoke with his back toward her. "What is your point?"
"That we don't make very good enemies, Ben." She took a step closer, watching the way his shoulders rose and fell with every breath. "We don't have to be. This is not our path. We saw it."
"You will stand with me," he whispered, his arms clasping behind his back.
"And you will stand with me," Rey echoed solemnly.
They were silent for a while, at an impasse, neither able to succumb to the other's desires, both unsure how they would ever be able to.
"I'm sorry," she said softly, reverently. "I shouldn't have abandoned you. I was wrong. They were wrong."
His shoulders stilled as his breathing halted, her confession cutting him anew, laying the master of the Knights of Ren bare and raw. He felt it again, the conflict, the pull to the light. His eyes slipped closed of their own volition as he focused on simply breathing again, his back angled toward her so that she could not see his face.
"You're not alone, Ben. Neither of us are, not truly." Her fingers reached out to him, hovering just out of reach before letting them fall to her side. "Try to remember that."
Sensing her close, he turned to face her, but in the next moment, she was gone. Ben Solo stumbled backward, his bare hands catching on the cold metal dressing table, holding himself steady. His heart raced in his chest, like a bird beating wildly to be unleashed from a cage.
Rey had spoken of choices, of light, but in her wake he saw only darkness, its waves crashing over him in a tumult. And the darkness consumed him in the absence of the light.