Title: Scooby Dooby Doo

Pairings: Waaaaaaayy too many to count!

Summary: If the CSI crew were the Scooby Doo crew and Warrick was watching it all…

Note: All-italic single-quotes are Warrick's thoughts, and whatever Greg says, I just added R's to what he says. So it's easy to understand.

Disclaimer: They're not mines "officially" but I'm planning on kidnapping Gary Dourdan some day. –thinks- If I had Gary Dourdan to myself for a full day what would I do… Oh I forgot. Fanfiction doesn't go up to NC-17. -sighs-Never mind…

Warrick walked out of Grissom's office for the first time that day. Warrick had taken over Grissom's place for a while when Grissom mysteriously walked out because of 'personal affairs'. Paperwork had consumed so much of his time that he hadn't had time to walk out of the office for four hours.

He went into the break room to see Cath with a short purple skirt, matching shirt, light purple tights, white heals and a green scarf. Warrick could do nothing but stare in confusion. Probably because of the reddish–orange wig she was wearing. She smiled when she saw Warrick.

"Hey, War!" she said excitedly.

"What…the…hell…" is all Warrick could say.

"What?" Cath said. Warrick shook his head.

"Well…okay. I'm going to go get started on work, okay? Check Greggo for my DNA results, will ya?" Warrick didn't answer. She shrugged and skipped down the hall. Warrick shook his head.

'Oookaaaaaay…what the hell was that…?'

Warrick walked out of the break room to the DNA lab, and met Sara in the hall. Sara was wearing an orange sweater with the sleeves pushed halfway up, a red mini-skirt, orange socks and brown dress shoes. A pair of thick, black–rimmed glasses sat on her nose, and her hair was cut shorter.

"Hi Warrick. Have you seen Grissom?"

"Uh…" Warrick said.

'This is starting to get oddly familiar… and freaky…'

"What?" Sara asked.

"N–nothing. I'm just gonna…go see Greg, okay?"

"Wait, Warrick. I need you to come with me. We'll ask Nick." Sara pulled on Warrick's arm.

"Do you really need me to come too?"

"Yeah. Nick's locked himself in the layout room with the lights off. He's been in there for hours. And you have the key…"

"Fine…whatever." Warrick walked to the layout room. Someone was inside with their back turned to the door. Whoever it was had raggedy brown bell-bottoms on and a green tee that was like three sizes too big. He had orange hair about the same color as Cath's wig.

'Who in the hell is that…?'

Warrick unlocked the layout room door, but the person inside didn't even seem to notice.

"Hello…?" Warrick said. The person still didn't notice. Warrick tapped him on the shoulder and the person jumped.

"Zoinks!" he screamed, jumping in Warrick's arms.

"What the…Nicky?!" Warrick said upon seeing the person's face. It was (duh) Nick. Warrick immediately dropped Nick, causing him to fall on the floor.

"Damn, Warrick! First you scare me half to death and then you drop me on the floor. Way to go to make a brother feel special," Nick said.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Warrick said.

"Uhh…Warrick…they're something called clothes…"

"Wow, Nick. Like I didn't know that."

"Well…whatever. What do you want?"

"Umm…Sara wanted you."

"Who?"

"Sara Sidle…you know…"

"Oh…you mean Velma."

"Oookaaaaaay…I think you've been in here way too long, Nicky. Now let's just get you out of here and get some fresh air."

"Nick…?"

"Nick, stop playing."

"My name's not Nick."

"Really…then what is it?"

"Shaggy. Duh."

"Riiight….well…um…SARA!!!" Warrick screamed. Sara came running down the hall.

"Jinkies, Shaggy! Why the hell were you cooped up in here for so long?" Warrick stared at Sara.

"Sara…did you just say 'jinkies'?"

"The name's Velma, Warrick. And yeah, I did. Why?"

"Velma? Whoa…a few minutes ago you were Sara."

"And he says I've been putting in too many hours…" Nick whispered to Sara.

"Okay…you know…this is getting freaky. I'm just gonna go get Cath's results from Greg."

"Get what from who, now?" Sara said. Warrick just shook his head and walked (or more like ran) to the DNA lab. Greg was sitting in his normal swivel chair, but with his knees in it.

'Is he sitting like…a dog?'

When Warrick got closer, he noticed the brown lab coat with…black spots. And he was wearing a blue collar around his neck.

'Is he…panting?'

"Uh…Greg?" Greg looked up at Warrick.

"Rhello Rwarrick," Greg said. Warrick could do nothing but stare. Especially when he noticed the fake dog–ears dangling from his head. "Rwarrick…rare ryou rokay?" Warrick slowly backed out of the room. He bumped into someone.

"Whoa, Warrick," Grissom said. Warrick squeezed his eyes shut, pumping his fist in the air.

"Gris, I'm so glad you're here! " Warrick screamed "Everyone's acting freakish and…" he turned around opening his eyes. Grissom was wearing a white shirt with a blue collar. For the first time that Warrick saw him he was wearing jeans, and an orange scarf was tied around his neck. Warrick's eyes widened.

"Warrick…are you okay?" Grissom said.

"No…this can't be happening…" Warrick said, backing away from Grissom. He ran into Cath again.

"Hey, watch it, War." She said. She looked down the hall to see Grissom.

"Freddie!" she screamed, running down to Grissom. She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Fred, don't ever take a vacation again. I missed you!" Catherine said. Before Warrick could even react, Nick screamed down the hall,

"Greggo! Where aarrrree yooooooouuuuu?!" Greg poked his head out of the DNA lab.

"Rover rhere!!" he screamed back.

"Okay guys…now that I'm back, we got assignments," Grissom said. "Okay, gang, let's split up on this one," Grissom said.

"Right, Gil. Right after a snack. Scoob…?" Nicky said.

"RI'm rin," Greg said. He ran on his hands and knees to the break room.

"Where's Sara?" Gil asked.

"Don't worry, I'll get her," Cath said. "VELMA!!"

"Cat, I could've done that," Gil said.

"Well, here she comes so I did something. And without breaking a nail, this time."

"What?" Sara said irritably.

"Sara," Grissom started.

"Whoa, wait…I thought she was Velma…" Warrick said.

"No…she's Sara."

"Okay…she's Sara now."

"No, I'm Velma," Sara said.

"But I thought…" Warrick stopped, shaking his head.

"Who the hell are you supposed to be anyways?" Cath said. "I mean you look like that Johnny bravo guy, but like, way less flirty and like…way hotter. I mean…look at you." Catherine ran her hand down Warrick's arm. "Do you like…work out or something?"

"So Freddie," Sara said, wrapping her arm around Grissom's. "Now that Cat's with that Warrick or Johnny or whoever…" Catherine immediately spun around, letting go of Warrick's arm.

"Oh hell no, bitch…he's mines!" Catherine screamed.

"Oh no he ain't!" Sara said, snapping her fingers, "You were hitting on…whoever the hell that is over there," she said pointing to Warrick. Warrick was still shocked and clueless on what he should do, so he just stared like he'd been doing for the past ten minutes.

"So? You know me. I'm like, perfectly perfect. I can flirt if I wanna flirt, right Warrick?"

"Uh…" Warrick said.

"SAY YES!" Catherine screamed. Warrick's eyes widened even more than they were and he slowly nodded.

"Rwhats rgoing ron?" Greg said coming out of the break room for the first time in ten minutes. Nick came behind him with a huge sandwich in his hands.

"Uh it's nothing, Greggo. Just another catfight Velma verses Daphne for Fred."

"What the hell is that," Catherine said, pointing to the sandwich.

"It's my favorite. Peanut–butter bologna and onion. Everyone grimaced except for Warrick, who was way too freaked out to even move. But then he realized something.

"Nicky…I thought you hated peanut-butter," Warrick said slowly.

"Uh…I'm not Nick," Nick said. Warrick looked up at the ceiling and burst out laughing.

"Of course…" he said.

"Are you…okay?" Sara asked him cautiously.

"Yeah I'm okay," he said looking at Sara. "Because I know that this is all a dream. It ain't real. Because of the peanut–butter and the catfight and the Sara but she isn't Sara…it's all making sense to me now," Warrick said, still laughing.

"Oookaaaaaay…" Nick said.

"Someone needs a straight jacket…" Catherine murmured.

"I need a straight jacket? Oh I get it. You're scared of me. You think I'm crazy. Well I'm not, honey baby because this is all a dream!" Warrick said to Catherine, touching her cheek, hitting it lightly with every word he said.

"A what?" Sara said.

"A dream. Not real." Everyone stared at him. "It's an illuuuuusssiooon!" Warrick screamed waving his arms in front of him. "All I need to do is wake up. C'mon Warrick, wake up!" he said, clapping his hands near his ears. "Just wake up out of this Scooby Doo World…"

"Scooby Doo World?" Grissom said.

"Ri rhave ra rworld rnow?" Greg said.

"You guys know! Scooby-Dooby-Doo, where are you? We got some work to do now…" Warrick sang. They just stared at him. "Scooby-Dooby-Doo, where are you…"

–-–

"Warrick…"

"No, don't wake him up. He looks sorta cute when he's sleep."

"Ooh, Cath…someone gots the hots…"

"Yeah, Sara. Like you for Gil."

"Nick…you weren't supposed to tell that. Otherwise I'd tell Catherine the confession of your undying, unconditional love for her."

"Whoa, Nick! Undying? You've been holding back on me…"

"Yeah. You probably didn't know you were giving Gil some competition."

"Sara!"

"What? As long as we're telling the truth here…" Warrick's eyes fluttered open.

"What the hell…" he murmured.

"Finally! Damn, Warrick you scared us!" Catherine said.

"Gots the hots…" Sara repeated. "Warrick," Sara said, now speaking to Warrick, "just because you're tall enough to reach the rafter, doesn't mean you pull yourself up to retrieve evidence.

"Yeah, especially since you're one hundred and ninety five pounds and common sense would tell you that a little wooden thingy that's no more that a foot and a half big is gonna break if you hang on it," Nick said.

"Okay, Nick," Cath said.

"And then you come crashing down from a 'death–defying' seven feet and thank God you landed on a table otherwise Gil'd be screaming his ass off telling you that you contaminated a crime scene. Well…after you wake up anyway…"

"OKAY Nick…" Grissom said.

"What the hell happened?" Warrick's said finally.

"Nick pretty much explained it," Cath said. "You saw evidence–the only evidence we've seen in weeks and you tried to get it, but it was like…two inches out of your reach. So you grabbed onto a wooden rafter and it broke–"

"And dammit if you weren't hurt man, I'd be laughing my ass off…" Nick interrupted.

"Nick, shut the hell up!" Cath said. "ANYWAY… you fell and if the table hadn't been right under you, you could've really been hurt. But it was, so you fell on it and hit your head–"

"And hit it hard…damn it was like CRREEAAAKKK…BOOM!!"

"NICK!"

"Sorry…"

"You passed out." Cath said to Warrick. "And you're okay now, so that's good…" Warrick sat up straight, looking at Cath.

"Catherine…" he said slowly.

"What?"

"You. You…"

"I…what?"

"You have blond hair! And it's not red!! AND NO PURPLE!!!" Warrick screamed. He thrust his arms around Catherine.

"He's okay, huh?" Nicky said sarcastically.

"Nicky! You're not wearing a wig!" Warrick laughed pointing at Nick. "HE'S NOT WEARING A WIG!"

"Um…Catherine…" Sara said cautiously. "I think we should've taken him to the hospital…"

"And Sara…your name's Sara, right?"

"Yeah…" she said slowly.

"Yes? You said yes? She said yes! WHOO!"

"How hard did he hit his head?" Gil said.

"Grissom! You're not Fred! And Velma and Daphne aren't fighting over you!"

"Who?"

"Yes! Everything's not Scooby-Doo-a-fied!" Warrick said.

"Warrick…what are you talking about?" Catherine said. Warrick snickered.

"Nothing, honey baby!" he said touching Catherine's cheek.

"Honey baby?" Sara and Nick repeated.

"It's just that the Velma and th-the catfight a-and the peanut-butter-bologna-onion sandwich and t-the wigs…and the seventies…the ears and spots…Scooby Dooby Doo…it was all an illuuuuusssiooon!!!!" Warrick babbled waving his arms in front of him. Everyone stared at him. Catherine put her hand on Warrick's shoulder.

"Warrick…sweetie…I think you need to lay back down…" she said slowly, pushing on his shoulder.

"No," Warrick's said brushing Catherine's hand off his shoulder. "No I'm not crazy. Because I remember it. I remember it all! Sara was Velma and Cath was Daphne…Gil was Freddie and Nicky was Shaggy…where the hell is Scooby?" Everyone continued to stare at Warrick. "It…was a d-dream, huh?" Warrick said slowly.

"Uh…yeah," Cath said.

"Damn…you must've hit your head way harder than I thought!" Nick said. Before anyone said anything, Greg came in crawling on his hands and knees. He was wearing a blue collar around his neck.

"Greg, what the hell are you doing?" Catherine said.

"Just exploring all the wonders of what it would be like to be a dog." Greg sensed the stared coming form the room. "Don't worry…I got all the evidence out. But I heard Warrick knocked himself out. That was genius…"

"Hey, leave Warrick alone. He was doing his job," Cath said defensively.

"Oooh…protecting your man…I like that in a woman," Greg said. He barked and Warrick's eyes widened.

"No!" Warrick screamed, falling off the couch and hitting his head…again. "Boy…you better stay away from me…go get a Scooby Snack or a onion sandwich or something…JUST STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!" Warrick screamed, backing into the corner.

"Oookaaaaaay…" Grissom said. "That's the last time I leave you guys alone for roach-racing…"

–-–

END

AN: review, Review, REVIEW!!