(( A/N: I has too much time on me hands. Also contains strong language, maybe not this chapter, but definitely the next. There will be no sex ever because I can't be bothered to write those sort of scenes and have it not be completely wrong and stupid. Rated M just to be safe with le language. :P Uuuuuuummmmmmmmmm...Lots of OOC! ))

"Stupid Cid!" Yuffie huffed, climbing higher and higher on Mt. Nibel, "Stupid Rocket Town!"

After a rather peaceful visit to her old man in Wutai, Yuffie headed off to 7th Heaven where she was free from responsibilities of a princess. Not that she took up those responsibilities while she was in Wutai. She complained and whined her way out of it which probably took longer than the actual duties itself; Kiss some babies there, make mothers happy here, show a bit of respect to the oldies, etc. Pppsssshhhhhhhhh, whatever. She really couldn't be bothered.

She had better things to do like shove her nose in Cloud and Tifa's relationship. They really weren't going to make it anywhere without the great Yuffie.

Yuffie, on her merry way to 7th heaven, decided ever so kindly to stop by Rocket Town to catch up with Cid and Shera. No, she wasn't being nice because she wanted a ride. No, of course not! She was just missing her best friend, Cid Highwind. Too bad he didn't feel the same about her. He made that quite clear by slamming the door on her face before she could even steal anything.

Darn.

Instead of going straight to Midgar, she remembered Vincent Valentine whose monthly badgering was just about time. She couldn't miss that, she had a reputated to up hold! Plus, how would poor Vinnie feel if she forgot about him?

So here she was, the Single White Rose of Wutai, crossing the dirty mountain of Mt. Nibel for her angsty ally.

Once Yuffie passed the Shinra mako reactors to which she stuck her tongue out at, something shiny and spherical caught her eye.

"MATERIA!" Yuffie shouted, throwing herself onto the hard ground of Mt. Nibel fully encompassing the small object. She looked at the silver orb in her hands and had the feeling the orb was dreading its existence.

"Don't worry, silly!" Yuffie said, standing up as she patted the orb, "Yuffie's going to take good care of ya'!"

With the materia in her hands, Yuffie resumed her journey.

"Now what is it you do? I don't think I've ever seen silver materia!"

Holding out her right hand, the materia cupped safely inside of it, she exclaimed, "Go, silver materia!"

Less than ten feet from her stood six foot seven of silver hair, leather and a huge sword.

"Oh AH EM MEH GAWD FRSHHTHPP!"

Sephiroth turned around having realized his company. He regarded her slightly, tilting his head to the side, "Oh, so you are mentally retarded. The flower girl had told me you were, but I didn't think so." He smirked, his eyes dancing evilly as all evil do-ers eyes dance only the dance of evil, "Guess I stand corrected."

"Liar!" Yuffie shouted, pointing an accusing finger at Sephiroth, "What are you doing here, Liar McDestroytheworldleatherpants?!"

"I think that's obvious."

"...?"

"To call forth my mother and destroy this pathetic world! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHASQUEEE!" He began, throwing his hands up while he groped the air, his voice growing deeper and louder as he met his end of his sentence until a surprising twist of his voice became high pitched.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Yuffie cried out dramatically, dropping to her knees.

With a blink, Yuffie realized something, "Wait, squee?"

"SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!" From his mortified expression and his bright green eyes staring wide down at his mouth, he had no idea what was happening.

Suddenly, a blinding blaze of light ripped through space and as a pink clad Cetra stepped out, flowers greeted her feet, "Tee hee."

"Aerith!" Yuffie exclaimed, jumping five feet into the air flailing her legs and arms.

"SQUEEeee~!" Sephiroth sounded as excited as Yuffie, but his expression was that of a executioner.

"Hey Yuffie!" Aerith smiled, waving her hand.

"What are you doing here?" Yuffie asked, "Aren't you suppose to be dead!"

"Squeeee..." Sephiroth agreed, having seen and talked to the girl in the liftestream.

"Just checking up on Sephy over there," Aerith, though the blatant words of the ninja caused her heart to teeter to the dark side, smiled forcibly and thumbed at Sephiroth.

"What's he doing being alive again? He has no business being alive!" Yuffie pouted, placing her fists on her hips and puffing out her cheeks.

"SQUE-!" Sephiroth looked like he had been about to yell something menacing that made even the hearts of the dead shiver in fear, but stopped short when he remembered his condition.

"I see what you mean," Aeirth mused, placing a hand on her hip while the other rested against her chin, "he did try to destroy the planet twice now, but no worries Yuffie!" She smiled cheekly brightly again, jutted out her hip to one side and threw her head to the other, "He's in your control!"

"Huh...?" Yuffie was slightly disturbed by Aerith's manic movement.

"What?" Sephiroth asked. He brightened visibly and looked happily puzzled. His eyes lit up as he laughed, "I'm normal again! MU-SQUEEEE~!"

"Mmhmm. See, that materia there your holding is like his mind and soul, you control it Yuffie!" Aerith still hadn't moved from her awkward pose and her smile and eyes grew even wider.

"Woah! Awesome! But, why is he "Squeeing" like that? I'm not making him do that."

"Yea, he'll be doing that for a while. It's a sort of rehabilitation thing for him. Whenever he thinks of sinful things, what ever comes out of his mouth will be that high pitched, squeezing a rubber ducky like noise."

"Oh boy! No way! That's genius!"

"I did it more for entertainment really," Aerith said smugly, shrugging her shoulders, "Yes, I'm that great."

"Happy, happy thoughts," Sephiroth said to himself, looking to be concentrating very, very hard, "Good Sephiroth, think happy."

"I'll be watching you two!" Aerith smiled and waved. The bright light behind her grew brighter as if to suck her in.

"Wait, Aerith!" Yuffie called, running a few steps towards the flower girls.

"What is it, Yuffie?"

"Did you really say I was mentally retarded?" Yuffie pouted her lips as her wide watery eyes pleaded at Aerith.

"Oh, um..." Aerith trailed off, her eyes shifting from left to right, "Lifestream's calling! KTHNXBAI!"

The light engulfed Aerith and once it was gone, the pink cetra was too.

"Huh..." Yuffie said, not quite sure what to make of what just happened.

To her right, Sephiroth chanted, "Daisies, frolicking through flowers, sunshine-"

A large grin appeared on Yuffie's face, slowly turned to the silver haired man and said in a voice used for dogs, "Who's a good boy? Sephy's a good boy!"

"RIPPINGOFFNINJA'SHEA-SQUEEEEE~!"

"HAHAHAHAHA!"