A/N- Don't worry, I don't plan on really killing Syrus-kun, but that might change once I start writing. Syrus: O.O You're gonna kill me?! Me: Maybe. Syrus: NOOO!! Me: And yes, this is another song fic. Are they allowed? No. Do I care? Not really. I like them, and that's that. Italics are . . . random sentences that I decided to fit in. I know it sounds weird, but it'll make sense when you read the story. Sometimes I might use a line from the song, but not all the time. The song is 'Time Of Dying' by Three Days Grace.
Disclaimer- Nope, no owning Yu-Gi-Oh! GX here. If I did, Syrus-kun would be the star. Syrus: Yay!!
Syrus Truesdale was walking with a slight limp towards the Yellow Dorm. There was no point in going to the Red Dorm, not anymore. Ever since that Jesse person came around, Jaden didn't have time for his old best friend anymore. Syrus had been cast aside like yesterday's newspaper.
You turned around and betrayed your only brother.
If he hadn't been talking to Zane every night on the phone, he would have gone insane. With no one to talk to anymore, life on the Academy had gone from bad to worse. He had actually started to look forward to his weekly beatings. It was the one time of the week when people actually talked to him. Syrus knew that this was sad, but it was true.
Never thought you'd forget me.
Syrus sadly walked with his head down, ignoring the few people who walked by him.
After we'd been through so much, how could you let me down?
(Syrus: Time out! I sound emo! Me: You're friendless! Of course you sound emo! Syrus: But I don't- Me: Just let me get on with the story. Syrus: Humph) Syrus decided to think about something other than Jaden. His mind strayed to thoughts of his parents, or lack of.
Something's gone.
They had died fourteen years ago, and frankly, Syrus couldn't care less. He couldn't even remember what they looked like. Actually, Syrus kind of hated them. Thanks to them, he had grown up on the streets. Living off of garbage, begging, and stealing. Starving and freezing, never knowing if they'd live through the night. It had been a nightmare.
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare.
Zane had helped him get through it, but Zane was only two years older than Syrus. It was hard to picture him as a guardian, but Syrus managed. As long as Zane was always there for him, Syrus would be fine.
Don't leave my side.
(Syrus: Why am I so emo? I don't like it! Me: You've been betrayed by your best friend and lover. Syrus: LOVER? Me: Okay, I made that part up. Syrus: You made a lot of this up. Me: Just shut up and let me write. Syrus: Fine. Write your stupid story. Me: Thank you . . . and I like my stupid story.) Syrus had made it to his dorm. He walked inside like a ghost and went to his room, not paying any attention to his surroundings.
Tired of everything around me.
He entered his room, as he did every day, and locked the door. It's not like he got any visitors. With no eyes there to watch and judge him, Syrus collapsed to the floor, and cried, trying to block out the cruel voices inside of his head.
Whispers taunting.
The thoughts were torturing him, forcing unwanted tears out of his eyes.
I'm dying inside.
A ringing song dragged him out of his misery. It was his cellphone. Syrus answered it robotically, tears still falling down his face.
"Sy? You there?"
"Yeah. I'm here . . . unfortunatly."
"Are you crying?"
"Maybe . . ."
I wish I couldn't feel at all.
"You told me that you'd stopped crying, that you'd made new friends."
"Well, I lied."
"Why would you do that?"
"Didn't want you to worry about me."
"Syrus, I'm your brother. I'm supposed to worry about you."
"Then why aren't you here?"
I need you.
"You know that I can't go to the Academy."
"But why not?"
I miss you, you hurt me.
"I don't have the time."
Those five words pierced Syrus' heart, and made it stop for a second. His eyes widened, shock stopping the tears for the time being. He stared at the phone, faintly hearing the sound of his brother saying his name. He shut his eyes, and threw the phone at the wall. It smashed at contact, erasing the sound of his brother's voice.
I never thought you'd do that to me.
Didn't have the time? Didn't have the time? He always used to say that he would always have time for his little brother. Syrus had never needed his brother more than he did now, and he didn't have the time. This hurt more than the fact that Jaden had ditched him for Jesse. Why did everyone leave him?
Where are you?
Syrus crawled to his bed and pulled himself up onto it. He buryed his head in the pillow, letting the fabric soak up the tears.
On this bed I lay, losing everything.
Syrus tried to stop the tears, but it only made them worse. He hated feeling like a little kid, he was seventeen, not two, but . . . it was too much. The fact that nobody cared about him was killing him. He had thought that his brother had cared, but obviously not. Syrus could feel his will to live ebbing away.
I don't have much to go before I fade completely.
Syrus turned over to lay on his back. He held up his left arm and pulled back the sleeve. He looked at the scars that he had left from cutting himself. He knew that it wasn't a safe thing to do, but . . . whenever he cuts himself, he forgets about everything else. He had only cut himself three times . . . once more couldn't hurt.
All I want, all I need is some peace.
Syrus grabbed the mirror that was on his bedside table, and dropped it on the ground, shattering it. He grabbed the biggest piece and laid back down on his back. He held up his left arm and cut it, under his other scars. He calmly watched as the blood ran in small rivers down his arm. It didn't hurt enough, not nearly enough. He was used to pain worse than this. He needed more. He cut himself again, under his previous cut.
If only you knew the hell I put myself through.
That was better. He watched, fascinated, as his arm turned red. He knew that if he didn't do something to stop the blood flow, he'd die, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to move. He was frozen, watching the blood die his yellow jacket sleeve red. There was too much blood. He felt light-headed.
It's slowly killing me.
Syrus felt the panic start to sink in. (Syrus: Why are you making me stupid? Me: Maybe because you are. Syrus: I'm not stupid enough to cut myself! Me: JUST LET ME WRITE! Syrus: Fine. But don't blame me when my fangirls flame you.) He sat up too fast, making himself dizzy. He held his head with his right hand, and stood up. He had to get help, before it was too late.
I'm so far from where I need to be.
He limped to the door and grabbed the handle with his good hand. The rest happened in a blur. He was walking . . . somewhere. His legs seemed to know where they were going, so he let them lead. He was on a path, going . . . to the Red Dorm or the Blue Dorm, he wasn't sure which. Syrus was too distracted to notice the root in the path until it was too late. He tripped, fell on his face, and stayed down.
On the ground I lay
Motionless in pain
I can see my life flashing before my eyes
Images were flashing before his eyes, too fast for him to make sense of them. The pain was smothering him, crushing him, killing him. The world was fading, slowly, slowing fading. In a last effort to make himself heard, Syrus screamed, as loud as he could. Then, the world disappeared.
Dead I fall asleep
Is this all a dream
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare
It was dark, so dark. Syrus was sinking in a black hole, but there were voices, taunting him. He was dying, sinking to the pits of hell . . . hell? He didn't want to go to hell. He didn't want to die at all, not yet. He couldn't. There was still something that he had to do. He fought the inky darkness, fought with all that he had, fought for his life.
I will not die (I will not die)
I will survive
The darkness didn't seem as smothering as it had before, he was winning. This gave Syrus new found strength, hope. He had to see his brother once more before he died. Just one more time. He wouldn't mind seeing Jaden, just to ask why. So, he wouldn't die, no, not yet. He struggled, pushing the darkness away from him. He would see Zane and Jaden, he had too.
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive, when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying
Syrus slowly opened his eyes. Everything was blurry. He almost paniced, but than he realised that his glasses were missing. He sighed with reflief. He was lying on a bed, and judging from the smell, he was in the hospital wing. His arm was on fire, someone was hitting his ankle with a hammer, and his head was pounding, but he was alive.
On this bed I lay
Losing everything
I can see my life passing me by
He blindly reached beside him were he thought the bedside table would be for his glasses. When he finally found them, he put them on and looked around, being careful to not move his head. He was alone. He wondered how long he'd been here, and if anybody cared. Looking at his empty room, Syrus came to the conclusion that no one did. No surprise there. Nobody cared about the runt.
Was it all too much
Or just not enough
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare
Syrus decided that there was no point in him staying awake when there was no one to talk to, so he closed his eyes and let the darkness take him. This time, he was ready for it. He was able to keep it away from him. Syrus sat down and hugged his knees. It was so lonely here, with nothing but darkness and strange voices whispering to him to keep him company. It took all his will power keep the darkness away. But he did. He wouldn't give in, not yet.
I will not die (I will not die)
I will survive
Syrus lost track of time. There was no time there. No time, no pain, no nothing. It was kind of nice, in a lonely sort of way. He was tempted to let go, and let the darkness drag him down. But he couldn't yet. He had to give Zane and Jaden a piece of his mind before he let the darkness take him. Yes. He just had to be patient. And it wasn't that bad here. No . . . not that bad.
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive, when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying
Syrus buryed his head in his knees and cried. It was that bad, it was horrible. The darkness was pushing him to his limits, the voices taunting him, questioning his sanity. It was a nightmare, the worse he'd ever had. So, he cried. But . . . something wasn't right. His eyes were burning. He raised his head, and opened his eyes. It was red, all red. He couldn't see. His eyes were on fire. The voices were getting louder. The darkness was closing in. Syrus screamed. The darkness poared into his open mouth, choking him. He couldn't breathe. The voices were screaming. Then, everything disappeared.
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
I feel alive, when you're beside me
I will not die, I'll wait here for you
In my time of dying
(Syrus: Did I just die? Me: You ruined the dramatic moment. Syrus: Oh . . . sorry. Me: Okay, I have got to stop talking to a fictional cartoon character. Syrus: I'll say. Me: GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!)
It was dark. There was pain . . . pain? That meant he was still alive, didn't it? Dead people couldn't feel pain, could they? There were voices, calling him. Familiar voices. Who were they? Syrus focused on the voices. It sounded like his old friends and his brother. But how could that be. Were they in this hell hole too? But wait . . . the voices were faint, far away. Maybe they were outside, trying to get him out. He stood up, and blindly walked toward the voices. Ignoring the pain, he walked on. It was getting warmer, the voices louder. The darkness was fading. Syrus closed his eyes, and prayed for this nightmare to end.
I'm so sick of this.
Syrus opened his eyes. It was bright. There were people around him. He was confused. Everything was too blurry. Someone said his name. Who? Then, everyone started to talk at once. It hurt his head. He couldn't consentrate. They were talking too fast. He couldn't make sense of it. He didn't know what was going on. This was all happening too fast. Syrus closed his eyes, and slipped back into unconsiousness.
Don't leave me here on my own.
When he woke again, Syrus felt a bit better. His head was clearer, though his eye sight wasn't. Syrus reached over, grabbed his glasses and put them on. There were tubes sticking in him. He didn't like it, not at all. He looked around, and saw his brother sleeping in a chair beside his bed. He was still too confused to make sense of this. Syrus continued to look, and saw that Jaden was sleeping in the bed next to him. What was he doing there? This whole thing was way to confusing. It made Syrus' head hurt.
All these questions run through my mind.
Then, Syrus realised what he was looking at. Zane and Jaden. He had seen them. He had done it. He'd won. He had lived long enough to see them. Syrus smiled. He felt his eyes closing. He was so tired. Syrus sighed happily, closed his eyes, and slept.
I feel alive, when you're beside me.
A/N- Well, that's that. Syrus: Did I die? Me: I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. That's for you decide. Syrus: I hate you. Me: Anyway, I hoped you enjoyed it. I worked really hard on this. I would have had more dialogue but . . . I suck at dialogue so . . . I avoided it xD. I'm happy with the way it turned out. It was darker than the stuff I usually write but I guess I'm in a dark mood. And I've had this idea for a while, so I had to write it eventually. Well, please review. Even if the only thing you have to say is that sucked. Hopefully you don't think that. Syrus: Just stop talking. Me: Yeah, okay.