Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. If I did, Derek would return to Meredith and their candle house in 5.01.

After finding out that the season five premiere picks up two weeks later, I got a little annoyed and decided to write a one shot. I've never written from this perspective before, so I hope its okay. Enjoy.

This isn't you. You're not the girl who does things like this. Candle houses and long speeches about kitchens and playrooms. And yet, here you are. Standing in a field of candles. Well, now you're sitting. He's been gone for a while now and your feet were getting tired. The bottle of champagne is in front of you, and you're still wondering where he found it. But right now, maybe that doesn't matter so much.

Because you're here.

In your candle house.

And that still shocks you.

This morning when you woke up, you never would have guessed that this is how your day would turn out. Because when you woke up, your mother tried to kill herself. Derek was dating a nurse. And you were alone. But then, you had a revelation. Well, maybe revelation is too strong of a word. You had an "aha" moment. It was a big "aha" moment though. One that changed your life forever. It was the reason you're sitting here in the grass waiting for him to return.

Maybe the musky vanilla scent of the candles was getting to you and doing strange things to your brain, but you begin thinking. And thinking, well, sometimes that was dangerous. He's been gone for over an hour now. You begin wondering if he's coming back. If maybe this was all a dream. Certainly Meredith Grey would never do this. After you pinch yourself a few times to make sure, you realize that this is actually happening.

It shocks you. It brings tears to your eyes. Cristina would mock you endlessly if she saw you here amidst your candle house getting all teary eyed. It was too fairy tale-esque . Of course, in the fairy tales, Prince Charming carried you to the castle on the hill. And in your story, you walked out to the hill by yourself and built the mini-castle, and he met you there after you cursed him off for a while, wondering to yourself what kind of stupid loser does this. It wasn't romantic, but that was never your strong suit anyway.

You should have said more while he was here, but that kiss-it left you kind of speechless. Because you did it. You, Meredith Grey, ruler of all that is dark, twisty, scary, damaged, awkward and freaky, actually did it. It was probably the most frightening, thrilling moment of your life, but so completely worth it.

The way he looked at you makes it worth it. The way he kissed you makes you glad that you built a candle house, even if it makes you feel like a lame ass loser. Maybe you were. After all, you're sitting on slightly dewy grass holding an unopened bottle of champagne. Only you don't see it as grass. You see it as your dream house. The dream house you're sharing with Derek, the love of your life.

The love of your life.­

You smile slightly at those words. You haven't called him that directly, but he claimed you as his a while back. The words had taken you by surprise at first, but still, you smiled in spite of yourself. As scary as it was to hear those words, they made you happy. Though you haven't said it to him, you both know that he is the love of your life. You love him. He may be a stupid brain man sometimes, but you do love him. Building a candle house and ranting about the room where the kids could play all but said the three words. You get goose bumps, and it's not just because you're getting cold. You get them thinking about what you said. Everything that happened.

That was extraordinary.

You could be extraordinary together. You are extraordinary together.

Despite your pessimism for all things bright and shiny, you smile and lie back on the grass. It doesn't matter that you're getting it in your hair or that you're slightly uncomfortable. Because in this moment, you're proud of yourself. You did what your mother never did. As you look up at the stars, you begin to think that if there really is a heaven, and your mother is up there, she's giving you a nod of approval, silently telling you that she's proud. She might call you crazy for lying on the grass so close to candle flames. You laugh a little at the thought. In reality, it probably is a little dangerous.

But that's okay. Because tonight-tonight you got your forever. And he kissed you. Thinking back, you remember that he said he wanted to do more than kiss you. At first, you assumed he was talking about sex. But the more you mull this over in your mind, you begin to think that he was talking about so much more than that. He was talking about the bigger picture. A house that wasn't made of wax and flame, but rather, bricks and bedrooms. And everything that came along with that sort of thing. These thoughts make you feel excited and terrified all at the same time.

You're so deep in your inner ramblings that you don't hear him stepping over the candle threshold and into the house. It isn't until he lies down next to you that you snap out of your thoughts.

"Hey," was all you could muster.

Derek looks at you and gives you a smile. The kind of smile that you haven't seen in weeks. It wasn't a forced, fake smile. It was a genuine Derek smile. "Hey."

You turn your head to face him, wanting to look into the blue eyes that you loved. "How did it go?"

"It...went," he sighed.

"Oh."

"I think she expected it, but..." he breathed, unsure of what to say next.

"Not so smooth?" you offer.

Derek chuckles softly. "You could say that." After a moment of looming silence, he speaks again. "I didn't think you'd still be here."

"I wasn't going to leave without you," you say quietly, realizing afterward the double meaning of your words.

"Good," he smiled, reaching over and lacing your fingers with his own.

"The candles are burning out," you comment idly.

Derek looks over at you with an amused expression. "Where did you get all of them?"

You feel a blush come over your cheeks. "A box in my garage. Izzie likes to buy in bulk," you giggle.

"How long have you had this planned?" he asks, putting a hand behind his head as you both look up at the sky.

"I didn't", you confess. "It...sort of just happened."

"I have to admit, this took me by surprise," he said with a chuckle.

You join in and laugh softly. "Me too."

"Sorry I took so long," he says, rolling onto his side so he could look at you. Apparently he can't fight the urge to kiss you, so he does.

You don't resist it. Instead, you roll on top of him and kiss him until neither of you can breathe. When you sit up, he scoops you into his lap and you wrap your legs around his waist. "I'm still mad at you," you whisper.

"I know," he nods, kissing your forehead. It's moments like these that made you fall in love with him in the first place. The simplicity of just being with him. Right now, things aren't so complicated. You forget that he can be an ass. And all you can think about is how you could sit here with him forever.

Forever.

He wraps his arms around the small of your back and you feel comfortable enough to ask. "When you said you wanted to do more than just kiss me, what exactly were you referring to?"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Before you left, you said you had to talk to her so that you could do more than kiss me," you explain.

"I guess it means a lot of things," he confesses, meeting your eyes.

You raise your eyebrows slightly, hoping he'll divulge more than just that.

He swallows before speaking. "Remember when I told you I wanted a lifetime?"­

All you can do is nod. You feel your heart speed up, but in the best possible way. Sure, you're a little scared, but in this moment, the prospect of a lifetime only makes you happy. You stay seated in his lap, not running away waving your banner of avoidance. "Yeah," you say softly.

"That's what I meant," he smiles, thankful that you don't seem to be freaking out.

You can't think of anything to say, so you chew on your lip and look at him.

He looks back at you and gives you a nervous smile. "Say something," he pleads.

Instead, you push him back into the grass and kiss him again. You feel the tears stinging your eyes and despite the fact that your lips are pressed against his, you laugh. It's inappropriate to laugh at a time like this, but you don't care.

He rolls both of you over so you're lying on your sides. "Why are you laughing?" he asks before he notices the moisture in your eyes. "And crying?"

"Because," you smile. You're not trying to be vague. It's honestly the only thing you could think to say.

"Okay," he chuckles, wiping away one of the tears that falls down your cheek.

"We have to drink this," you say softly, reaching for the forgotten bottle of champagne. After several unsuccessful attempts, you pop the cork with your thumb and take a sip.

Derek laughs at your unladylike gesture. You simply smile at him and hand him the bottle. He follows suit and takes a drink from it.

"I don't have wine glasses anyway," he reasons, handing the bottle back to you.

You shrug. "This works for me."

"Me too," he smiles.

"I didn't think I'd be lying here with you when I woke up this morning," you say, silently cursing yourself for stating the obvious.

Derek looks at you and grins. "Me either-not that I'm complaining."

"Me either," you whisper before pausing. "So we're really doing this?"

"Building a house?"

You nod.

"Yeah. I mean, I want to. Do you...want to?" he asks nervously.

"Yeah," you say softly, confidently.­

"Good." He takes your left hand in his right and begins kissing each of your fingertips tenderly before reaching into his pocket.

You feel your heart begin pounding and your eyes focus on completely on his coat pocket. "Derek," you whisper with wide eyes. "Are you...?"

He pulls out a pair of gloves and hands them to you. "Am I what?"

You breathe a sigh of relief. "Oh God."

"What? Oh-you thought-you thought I was...?" he asks.

"Yeah," you admit, closing you eyes in embarrassment. "Not that-I just-it's not the right time for that."

He smiles at you. "Believe me. When I propose, it won't be while we're lying on grass."

This time, you don't know what to say. He said when, meaning that it would happen. It was real now. "Oh." You decide to put the gloves on rather than look at him.

"Meredith," he says in a way that gives you goose bumps. That's the kind of thing he does to you. He says your name like that, and you turn to goo. Not that you're complaining. He has that effect on you, and you wouldn't change it for the world.

"Hmm?"

"I am going to propose eventually," he states, unable to hide the smile on his face. "I already have some ideas running through my mind."

He says this, and it doesn't scare you. "Really?" you smirk.

Derek nods confidently. "Really."

"Okay," you whisper, pressing yourself closer to his body.

"Are you getting cold?" he asks. "We can go inside."

"Not cold," you assure him, moving the open bottle of champagne out of the way so you can stretch out on the grass. You might wake up with a stuffy nose and there's probably grass in your hair, but you don't care.

Apparently your confidence is shining through tonight, so you decide to continue talking. "And our bedroom is upstairs. You asked before-it's upstairs. I thought that building a second floor might be dangerous."

"Probably," he laughs. "What room is this again?"

You giggle softly. "Are you mocking me?"‑­

Derek shakes his head. "No."

"The room where the kids could play," you say softly.

"Hmm...Why this one?" he asks curiously.

You shrug. The truth is, you have no idea. "I don't know."

"I like this room," he says, offering you a small smile.

"Yeah?"

"There's a nice view here. And it's close to the living room," he comments.

You smile at the thought. "Yeah."

"We should probably put the kids' bedrooms down the hall, away from ours," he says with a smirk.

"So dirty," you sigh, smiling back at him.

"I'm just saying..." he says in defense, wrapping his arm around you. Right now, everything is perfect. You're lying in your candle house with the love of your life talking about pending proposals and kids' bedrooms.

You're not sure what prompted you to say it, but you suddenly hear those three words leave your mouth. "I love you," you say quickly, softly.

Apparently, this takes him by surprise too, and all he can do is smile; the look in his eyes telling you just how much he's wanted to hear it. "I love you too."

You let out a deep breath and wrap your arm around him as well, forming a horizontal embrace. He kisses your forehead and smiles.

Most of the candles have lost their flames, but the few that remain lit provide just the right amount of light. Everything is perfect. You both lay in silence for a while. Just as you feel yourself start drifting off to sleep, he wakes you up with a kiss. "Mer."

"Hmm?"

"Come on," he says softly, sitting up. He takes your hand and helps pull you to your feet. But you reach down to get the half empty-or half full-bottle of champagne. That's how you decide to spend your life from now on. Start thinking in terms of half full. You've been glass half empty since you were five years old, because your mother tried to kill herself and you would end up alone like she did.

Except now, you know that your mother didn't try to kill herself. And you're not ending up all alone. As it turns out, you actually did the thing you were most frightened of doing.

You got your extraordinary love.‑­

There are things that need to be said. There's so much more you need to say to each other. But right now, this is enough. Because tonight-tonight you got your lifetime. And that was way more than you expected when you woke up this morning.

As you walk hand in hand back to the trailer for sleep, you look back one last time at the house of candles.

It may not be a typical Meredith Grey thing to do, but who cares. You look up to the sky and smile, knowing for certain that your mother is there, smiling back at you.

You and your mother never got along. You fought constantly and never saw eye to eye. You always did the opposite of what she asked. But you did listen to one thing she told you.

She told you to be an extraordinary woman.

And for once, you listened.

And it's something quite peculiar
Something shimmering and white
Leads you here despite your destination
Under the Milky Way tonight

I was in a writing kind of mood, which is why this little one shot exists.

Love it? Hate it? Reviews make my day. :)