Dedicated to all the Lissa bashers.
Lissa- sniff
Wolfie- Will you ever shut up?
Lissa- I'll never die
Wolfie- o_O
Max's Pov, by the way.
The Ultimate Showdown
Fang and I were making out in a beautiful meadow. Sort of like Twilight, except Fang isn't a gay sparkly vampire and I'm not a whiney human that complains every five seconds. But other than that, this was just like Twilight. Heck, we were even wearing the same outfits Edward and Bella were in the movie. Crazy right? It was like we planned it or something!
So, there was this romantic music coming out of the flowers. What? They were speakers. Our budget isn't very big and we can't afford real singing flowers! Well, Twilight's budget wasn't very big but whatever. Their movie turned out more popular than this rip-off!
As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted by my mind, Fang and I were making out. When were we not? It's all we ever do these days in the fandom world. It was so romantic that we continued to kiss for the next ten chapters of the story. The end. Hoped you enjoyed now go review this piece of crap before I mentally combust. What? I just want to fell loved and Fang doesn't cut it for me.
Kidding! This isn't the end! We still haven't gotten to the part where Lissa goes crazy! Yeah, like I was going to leave it at that.
After ten invisible chapters of kissing, Lissa fell from the sky. In case you haven't heard, she was now part flamingo. I wish I was part flamingo. You get pink wings! Adds a little spice to life.
"Max! I challenge you to a duel!" Lissa screamed to the heavens while holding a pineapple.
"You're on!" And then I took out my banana guns and started to shoot.
Bits of fruit started to fly in every direction and Fang was swooning in the background. Everyone knows how manly it is to swoon. Lindsey Lohan does it all the time!
The fight started to get intense. Lissa had rockets sticking out of her back now and was shooting lightning from her eyes. All I had was my trusty spork. Darn you food utensil makers! She had no problem with blowing up my spork. Damn, and that was my favorite one too.
So I did what only a bird kid could do. I socked her in the mouth. Yup, it was that easy. Everything is that easy in the Maximum Ride world! The Lissa-tron spiraled out of control and exploded.
Feeling victorious, I walked back over to Fang to finish our make out session. To my surprise, he was already taken. Fang was making out with a caterpillar now. Ah, crap.
"Sorry, I don't date character bashers," he said and he then went back to kissing the insect.
A/N: Yeah, I called myself 'Wolfie' even though that is a completely different animal from a wolverine. Adds a little spice to life. That's my new saying.