Sweet Revenge

by Kate04

A/N: This little piece of silliness was inspired by a conversation about Sharon being a hugger and who might be next on her list. Apart from the obvious (Andy), this is probably the one person I'd love to see her hug most, just to see his face.

Anyway, because it's all about the partner, this is for my very own partner – Kadi219. Happy birthday, Flynn!

As always, a big hug and 'thank you' goes to Most Bossy Robin for her wonderful beta job and lontanissima for always having an opinion. ;-)

Not my sandbox, not my toys – I'll return them when I'm done playing, I promise!

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To refrain from imitation is the best revenge.

- Marcus Aurelius

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The moment Sharon stepped into the break room, she perceived Andy's mood. It was hard not to. It rolled off him in waves and almost knocked her off her feet. He was busy making coffee, his movements jerky as if he tried very hard not to punish the coffee maker for his bad mood.

She walked up to him, making sure he had noticed her presence before she put a gentle hand on his arm. It was never a good idea to startle someone in their line of work, especially if that someone was already wound up.

She wondered what had happened to get him this agitated. She had called him that morning to let him know that she had a meeting and might not make their lunch appointment. He had been cheerful and they had spent entirely too much time teasing each other and laughing about Taylor's most recent bouts of craziness.

At her touch he turned towards her, giving her a slight smile, which did not reach his eyes or erase the frown.

"Hey, what's wrong? Did something happen?" Her tone was soft and her voice low and she felt some of the tension melt away.

"It's nothing really - just my partner being his ever-annoying self. He's being even grumpier than usual. Been complaining about absolutely everything today and if that wasn't already enough, he's been relentless about …" Andy paused for a moment, the frown deepening as he considered his next words.

Telling Sharon about his partner's faulty assumptions about the nature of their relationship was probably not a good idea. Andy wasn't exactly sure how to define what they had between them. It definitely wasn't what Provenza thought it was. They weren't in a relationship, they weren't intimate, hadn't even kissed, although the thought had crossed his mind a couple of times. Andy was certain, though, that they had moved beyond mere friendship some time ago.

They weren't dating, they hadn't made any sort of commitment or even talked about it and he was as reluctant to put a name to his feelings as she seemed to be. So even if he wanted to set Provenza straight, which he didn't, what would he say?

Maybe that was why Provenza's constant criticism about their closeness got to him so much. He was beginning to grow frustrated with the uncertainty of their situation, even though he understood her reluctance to move forward.

No, this was neither the time nor the place for broaching the subject of his partner's misconceptions. Instead he decided to keep it vague, picking up his previous sentence as if the pause didn't exist, ignoring her raised eyebrow.

"…me not spending enough time with him."

Sharon let her hand travel up his arm and over his broad shoulders, feeling more of the tension vanish under her touch. Oh, how she wanted to let her hands wander over his body until she had explored every inch, feeling him relax completely underneath her hands, to see the frown disappear and the light return to his eyes. These last few weeks she had been in a particularly good mood. Rusty had graduated and had seemed to enjoy the fact that everyone was so proud of him and he had finally agreed to the adoption. That and the knowledge that her divorce was finally happening left her feeling unusually carefree, almost giddy and she had a hard time keeping up her usual controlled demeanour at work.

She also found herself thinking about her relationship with Andy more and more often. It was something that needed to be addressed soon. Now, however, was not the time for that. Now she would have to deal with her grumpy second-in-command. She would not have him succeed in spoiling her mood where even an entire morning of budget meetings had failed.

Her lips stretched into a sweet grin and her eyes sparkled dangerously. Andy was only too familiar with this look and he resisted the urge to take a step back. She was plotting something and someone would bleed. More often than he cared to think about he had been that someone.

"Oh, don't worry. He's going to cheer up now that I'm back." Her voice sounded deceptively cheerful and Andy couldn't help the grin that crept onto his face.

"Is that so? I admire your confidence, but you might wanna wait till you actually get a glimpse of his cheerful disposition yourself. It's probably gonna take a little more work than you think."

Andy marvelled at her ability to calm him down, even when he thought that nothing short of punching someone in the face would do the trick. He was actually looking forward to going back into the murder room. Whatever she had in mind for the old coot, it would surely be fun to watch.

"Just wait and see. Maybe you'll learn something." Sharon gave him one of her stunning, bright smiles, patted his shoulder and walked out of the room. Shaking his head, Andy followed her.

All eyes were on Sharon when she walked into the murder room, a spring in her step and a smile on her face. She looked into the familiar faces, answering smiles on almost all of them as they returned her greeting – all but one.

Lieutenant Provenza sat behind his desk, slumped in his chair with his obligatory crossword puzzle in front of him and a dark cloud over his head. Studying him closely, Sharon understood what Andy had been talking about. The foul mood radiating from her oldest lieutenant was almost overwhelming and she could see, as she looked around the room, how it was affecting everyone else. She would not tolerate that.

She resolved to keep an eye on the situation for the moment and hoped that he would pull himself out of it once they actually got to work and he didn't have time to think about whatever it was that was bothering him this time.

Two hours later, Sharon was nearing the end of her patience with her cranky lieutenant. He was impossibly opinionated today and didn't seem to care that he was making everyone miserable. When he actually had the audacity to snap at her, she felt her own mood darken. For a moment she considered ordering him into her office to dress him down. He certainly had it coming. The deadly silence that had fallen over the room indicated that this was exactly what everyone expected to happen. Even Provenza seemed to have realised that he went too far. His entire posture radiated defensiveness.

Just as she opened her mouth to give him a piece of her mind, Sharon hesitated. An update on proper conduct when talking to a superior officer would definitely not do anything to improve his mood and she really didn't feel like revisiting the times when they had been barely tolerating each other.

Andy almost saw her hackles rise at his partner's stupid comment. He saw her eyes narrow and her lips purse in indignation and knew that she would read Provenza the riot act. He had to suppress a snort as a certain song from Star Wars went through his mind. Oh yes, Darth Raydor was in the house and for once it wasn't anything he had done.

Then she suddenly relaxed again and Darth Raydor made room for something far scarier. Her annoyed expression changed into a devious grin and dangerously sparkling eyes and this time Andy couldn't fight the urge to back away slowly. Her eyes briefly flicked over to meet his and she gave him an almost imperceptible smile before she focused on his partner again. And then the unspeakable happened.

Thinking back to something Provenza had challenged her to a few weeks ago when Julio had returned from his medical leave, a plan began to form in Sharon's mind and its brilliance filling her with excitement. It would be far worse for her cantankerous old lieutenant than any dressing down she could come up with.

Changing her expression into one of fake compassion, Sharon walked over to the murder board where Provenza stood.

"Lieutenant, is everything alright with you? You seem a little tense today. It's beginning to worry me." Her voice was velvety soft in this deceptively friendly and compassionate way she had perfected during her time in Internal Affairs and she saw his eyes narrow. She waited for a few short seconds until she saw him draw a breath, undoubtedly to tell her where she could shove her concern, before she took one more step towards him and interrupted his thought, her tone even sweeter than before.

"Aww, you look like you need a hug. Come here." Before he had a chance to process her words, Sharon closed the remaining distance between them, put her arms around him and drew him into a tight embrace, her head right next to his. Her voice was low enough that only he could hear her when she spoke again.

"After all these years, you should know better, Lieutenant. Don't pick a fight with me. I always get even." She tightened her hold on him for a second before she released him and stepped back, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. He grunted in reply to her unasked question. Yes, he had understood. She had won – again – and he would keep his moods to himself.

As Sharon turned around to head towards her office, she noticed the other members of her team. Amy grinned unashamedly at Lieutenant Provenza, Julio was bent over his desk, intently staring at a file in front of him while his shoulders shook, Buzz stared at her wide-eyed and Mike gave her a knowing look. Nothing seemed to shake him up, she thought. It was a theory she might try to put to the test at some point.

When her gaze moved over to Andy, she almost broke down laughing. His face was bright red and his jaw moved back and forth as if he was trying to bite through his cheeks. His eyes sparkled with suppressed laughter as he gave her a nod, acknowledging her victory.

As she walked past him, she gave him an uncharacteristic wink before she vanished into her offices, closed the door and the blinds and finally gave in to the giggle she had been fighting to keep down. Sharon was convinced that the old grouch would definitely think twice before picking a fight with her again.