the complete package

Author: Ignited
E-Mail: (ignitedangel@aol.com)
Category: C/A Romance, Angst and some Fluff
Couples: C/A for nowMore to come.
Rating: R (at the moment) for violence and language
Spoilers: All of Angel Season 2, and BtVS Season 5. (Note: Spoiler speculation, so everything might not be correct, but it's set after 'Heartthrob')
Summary: Cordy unintentionally gets what she's always wanted. But is it worth it? First in Changes & Vows, ze series. ('Oh God, another one?!')
Disclaimer: Angel, Cordy, nor anyone related to the Angel/Buffy verse are mine. They belong to Joss Whedon, the Buffy God and so on. Sadly, neither does Angelus, nor his leather pants. Although, one can dream
Distribution: Those with permission. Ask and ye shall receive.
Dedication: To my cousin for giving me the idea, and being a fellow rabid C/A and B/S 'shipper, and to all those lovely darlings at the C/A board for giving me something to do during the summer reruns. Too many people to name, but those crazy girls know who they are. I promised fluff after my sad fic, and here's what you get.

Nathan Reed sat up straight, stiff as a board, eyes darting to the assembled panel of lawyers in the conference room, before looking to his agenda book. After taking a delicate sip of his coffee - black, no sugar - he cleared his throat.

"Lilah. You mentioned a project concerning our situation with Angel. Would you care to explain it?"

"Yes, sir," came the reply. All heads turned to Lilah Morgan, the newly appointed vice president. A smug look offered in the direction of her co-workers, she somewhat nervously bit the cap of her pen, before placing it on the desk in front of her.

"As we've seen before, whether alone or not, Angel continues to be a problem for Wolfram & Hart. We've tried different ideas, like trying to hurt those he cared about, or bringing Darla, back into his life. Although these plans didn't work, I think the only way to hurt him is from the inside. Before we take action, we'll have a - spy, if you will, to figure out his weaknesses. There was only so much Darla knew about Angel, and he's changed dramatically since their time together."

Well? Admit it. You like it. It's better than anything Lindsey could come up with, that's for sure. Lilah smiled to herself, remembering her partner, the same man who quit after he got a new hand. An evil hand, which seemed to like her - derrière

"Promising." Nathan languidly waved a hand at her. "And where are we going to get this spy?"

Lilah fumbled through her agenda book, while Nathan continued.

"Remember Ms. Morgan. Your efforts towards Angel have not been successful in the past. Such as Bethany Chaulk, for example. I don't want you failing again."

"Yes, sir." Lilah leaned over, placing an open manila folder in front of him. She pointed to the 8 x 10 glossy black & white photo of a young man, a college student.

"His name is Warren."

Two Weeks Later

"Don't start with me, Angel! I mean, at least you could try to be more presentable..." Cordy waved her hands up in the air, coming down the hotel staircase. A giving up gesture – why do I even bother with him? – she then heard the familiar confused male voice behind her.

"But Cordy, I'm trying–"

"Suuure, Dead Boy," Cordelia quipped, turning around quickly to look at Angel, who was following her. She catched him off guard, and he was suddenly very close in front of her, towering over her, smelling of soap and aftershave and well, Angel.

Cordy didn't want to resort to name calling, but this vampire had to get some things straight. Not actually some, more like a lot. I wonder how he actually survives in LA if it wasn't for me.

"Don't call me that," Angel growled.

"Why not?" Cordy's hands went on her hips.

"I don't like it." Angel was going for some major frownage. Plus, his eyes got all determined and broody. Pretty soon, he'd be doing that puppy dog look, and Cordelia knew she'd melt her icy walls.

"At least it's better than Angel," Cordy bit off.

"What's wrong with Angel?" Okay. There was the vampy voice.

"Girly name!"

Angel opened his mouth to protest, than clamped it shut. "What about Cordelia, huh?" he asked lamely.

"What about Cordelia?!"

"Bickering won't help anyone, now will it?" came Wesley's voice from the office. "Will you two stop your yammering, and come over here?"

Both Angel and Cordy turned to look in the direction of the office, then to each other, feet planted firmly on the staircase landing.

"See. He told you to stop yammering." Cordy stuck her tongue out at Angel, then practically dashed towards the office.

Angel stood there, dumbfounded for a few seconds, then shouted, "Did not!"

He followed Cordelia into the office. She was already comfortable sitting on a chair, slouching a bit in her seat. Once he came into the doorway, she offered a smirk in his direction, then that smile that made his unbeating heart melt.

Oddly enough, a random thought popped into his mind. That desk Just try and throw those papers and folders off Wesley's desk, and maybe throw her on there, and

Get a grip. Stop thinking about your best friend that way. Your *friend*. Just friend.

"Good Lord. Sometimes, you both act like children." Wesley, of course. He stood behind his desk, carefully placing a few folders into a suitcase. Wesley was wearing his jacket, and one of those impatient scowls.

"Yeah, dad. Angel should get grounded," Cordy whined in a ten year old's voice, holding back a giggle.

Angel shook his head at her, folding his arms across his chest. Now, serious mode. He nodded towards Wesley. "Going somewhere?"

"Ah, yes. I've been meaning to tell you both. A few days ago – More like a week actually, I received an invitation from a friend I used to know while working as a Watcher for the council. He's taken a vacation, and invited me to go and catch up on things at his rented house in Sacramento. Other Watchers will attend. I haven't seen them for years but" He trailed off, then stood up a bit straighter. "I won't take long. Just a couple of days."

"You're leaving us? I mean, for a while" Cordy stopped, her face brightening. "So that means–"

"Angel, I'm leaving you in charge."

"–What?!"

Angel nodded slowly. "Are you sure, Wesley?"

He tried not to show his feelings of happiness at this announcement, because well Sometimes, he didn't feel as needed as before. Sure, he was the 'vampire with a soul', but now Not exactly second in command. More like... the extra guy who wears a lot of black.

"Positive. Since it is the summer, Gunn will also be visiting some friends of his own, so he probably won't be around lately. We've already got a lot of things covered, so right now, he's focusing on strengthening up his own crew."

Cordy traced a small circle on the arm of her chair. She said something inaudible, but Angel definitely heard "Why can't I be in charge?"

"Guess he was talking about your yammering, Cordy," Angel pointed out, giving that little crooked smile.

"Oh.. Shut up," Cordy responded automatically, but in a playful tone. She wryly shook her head at Angel, then to Wesley, said, "So it's just going to be thetwo - I mean, three of us."

Three? Oh yeah. Fred. Angel felt a little bad about forgetting the new girl, but he was already used to just the four: Himself, Cordy, Wes, and Gunn.

"Fred has been feeling under the weather lately. She might come to the office, but who knows? It's better to let her rest."

Cordy sat up in her chair. She knew Fred stayed over at Wesley's place, since she technically didn't have an apartment, or anywhere else to live in for that matter. "I'll call her to see how she's feeling, okay?"

"Yes. Anything else, just give me a call. I left the number there." Wesley picked up his suitcase, nodding to the slip of paper on the desk. "I'll have to go home first to get the rest of my things, then the airport. I trust you two have ended yourquarreling, right?"

"Yeah," Angel said absentmindedly, going over to the desk. He picked up the piece of paper, studied it for a second, then looked up. "Have fun."

"Unlike some people. Do what he says, Wesley. We'll see you later." Cordy gave a wiggle of two fingers, smiling.

"I mean that. No bickering," Wesley stated, looking at Angel, then Cordy, eyebrow slightly raised. He then left the office, and hotel, suitcase at his side.

Angel slid into Wesley's chair, a slight chuckle of pleasure coming from him. Ah. The chairThe desk, the power.

"When your ego gets back to the real world, maybe we can decide what to do?"

Angel opened his eyes, mind muddled with thoughts of him giving wonderful orders, and Cordy at her last audition. Stop it with those random thoughts, damn it.

"Uh - what?"

"Figures. Zone out, why don't you?" Cordy got up and sat on the edge of his desk. She looked at the small desk clock. Eight forty six. Plenty of time to sit aroundand stare. "What do you want to do?"

"I was going to read–"

"Pfft. That's all you ever do. Brood and read. Usually at the same time. Don't you ever feel like doing something - different? Likenot wearing black for instance." She gestured to his black shirt. "Having fun?"

This is where he gives me that 'look'. 'Cordy, I don't know that word - what was it? Fun? What's that?'

"Cordelia"

Cordy stared at him, a sarcastic look.

"You know - how I am Around people. I - I don't like crowds."

And there's the stammering. "I didn't say it has to be around crowds. How about, going to the movies, or to the park, or dancing? Something!" She huffed.

"I can't dance."

"And that means you can't - gasp! - buy a ticket for a movie?"

Angel frowned. "I don't know"

"You know what? Forget it. Just - forget it." She stood up, leaning over to pick up her short black jacket. "You want to stay here and be ..Angel-y, then do it. But I'm not joining the club."

"Cordy. I - didn't mean Where are you going?" Angel asked, standing up.

"Somewhere fun. In other words, a place you'll never figure out. God Angel, don't you just wish to act - y'know–"

"Normal? Human?" He frowned, looking down for a second, then back up again. "Cordelia, I'm a vampire. That's not going to change."

"Not forever. You're going to turn human someday, and when that day comes, you'll be thanking me for teaching you about different stuff!"

Angel sighed heavily. "Cordy, you know I can't do a lot of things. I wish I could, but I can't. I'm not allowed. I don't want to try and do - certain activities, because it's not good for me, or anyone else for that matter."

That's right. I can't have a girlfriend. *I can't.*

Cordy looked at him, brow furrowed. The pretty smile was gone, and she was chewing her lip.

Never again. Because I can't give her a normal life. We can't – I can't even I don't want to go evil again. That almost happened, he thought, remembering when he fired his crew.

"Oh, yeah. You have a soul. Don't wanna go and loose it from having fun, getting happy, making other people – happy," She bit off, a sarcastic tone in her voice. After Cordy rubbed her temples, she murmured, "I'm just gonna go, all right? See you tomorrow."

"Cordelia, wait–" Angel came around the desk, following her as she walked out of the office. "Is there something wrong? Acting? Is that it?"

Cordelia turned to look at him, fingering the collar of her jacket. "No. I'll come by tomorrow. Bye Angel." With that, she left the hotel, fighting to keep her composure, and not–

Why does she always get to me like this? I can't stand to see her troubled.. She deserves a good man, someone who can take care of her, love her, make love to her

I can't.

I'm not human. I'm a vampire.

Angel trudged to the desk again, falling into his seat. He picked up a pen on the desk, then threw it angrily down, watching it clatter and roll off the desk. Leaning back, hands clasped like he was praying, his dark brown eyes closed. The phrase being repeated over and over again in his mind. Not human.

Not human. I'm just a vampire who doesn't give a damn if I act like a jerk and destroy Cordy's dreams – or delusions – of me ever being normal.

I couldn't be human. Because if I was, I'd never treat her like that, and claim to have a beating heart.

Not human. Just a fucking idiot.

"Hi Dennis. You okay?"

Cordy locked her front door shut behind her, peering into her dark apartment. The lights were off, but the TV was on, showing reruns of 'I Love Lucy'. Figures. Dead guys love these old shows.

Except for some dead guys who don't even own a TV.

"Jerk," she murmured under her breath. Cordy saw the TV screen flicker. "Not you, Dennis. Angel."

The lights turned on, and her jacket floated off easily, hand bag floating to the coat rack as well.

"Thanks. It must be true, then. The good guys are always dead, gay, or married," Cordy said. "And why have dead guys on the brain, Cor? Because you're mistakenly trying to convert one into your own ..guy?"

Cordy walked into the bathroom, running a hand through her hair. "I think too much. And talk too much Not to myself, anyway. Sorry Dennis, but I'm in a bad mood."

She flicked on the light, then moved to the mirror. Taking in the tangled mess of brown hair clipped up, the smudged mascara running down her cheeks, she turned the water on, letting it run over her fingers before washing her face. Cordy started to cry upon leaving the Hotel.

For what?

She had argued the point for nearly a half hour before Wesley yelled. Being presentable. No matter how hard she tried to teach Angel how to act normal, he just distanced himself more, enforcing the fact that he was a vampire.

A dead vampire. A used to kill people for fun, leather wearing, 'grr' faced, *dead* vampire.

Yeah. Just think about those things, and not those other naughty thoughts. Not the ones where Angel sweeps me into his arms, admits he loves me, that he *really* loves me all along, and then we kiss passionately, like there's no tomorrow.

God, I have to stop watching those old noir romance movies on Bravo.

She walked out of the bathroom, removing the rubber band from her hair. Stupid... vampire.

Stupid, stupid vampire. One who's not actually that stupid for figuring out how to make me get all pissed off for something silly. And having a crush on your former boss? Not exactly a good thing, especially when he used to be the Scourge of Europe.

It was bound to happen, wasn't it? It's hard to lay your eyes off of 'salty goodness' over there, and even harder to see him keep jonesing for a girl who's been dead for likethree months already.

And of course, with all these ever debilitating visions, going crazy and liking your best friend comes naturally, right?

"Cordelia? I've realized what an ass I've been, and that I can't help it butGod, I love youso much."

"In my dreams." Sighing, Cordy stopped in the doorway of her room. "G'night Dennis. Don't stay up too long watching TV. There's such a thing as the electric bill."

Again, the TV screen flickered.

"Uh huh." Cordy gave a weak smile, before retiring to her bedroom.

He was dancing a gavotte, wearing the clothes of the Olden Times, his hair long and in a pony tail. In his arms was his beautiful blonde lover, Darla, his sire, a smile on her face.

They both strode merrily to the music, him laughing, and her giggling. Of course, they both had the same thought in their minds. A pretty serving wench, tied up and gagged, was waiting for them in their suite on the second floor. They already had an appetizer earlier, a young servant boy, but their stomachs growled hungrily.

"Angelus, would you like to eat now? I'm thirsty." Darla said, gazing into his mischievous eyes. She wore a glamorous dress of ruby red velvet, which made her soft hazel eyes seem to glow and look like precious jade. He was formal and handsome in his evening clothes.

"Ah...All right darling." he replied with a grin, a smidgen of reluctance in his tone. But he knew the girl was fresh and her blood, now laced with rapturous adrenaline would be so much sweeter to the taste. He always thought captive and struggling prisoners were like wine: they'd get better with age.

He traversed happily up the stairs to his shared room, arm in arm with his only love.

At this time, Angel bolted upright in his chair, panting. He gasped, staring down at the desk before, remembering what would happen next. It was all too real for him, he felt as if he had just relived that moment, that night that happened in a place far, far away, and a time so long, long ago.

Then the thoughts of Cordy's pretty but saddened face drifted back to him, making the pain roll over him in waves.

Cordelia

I can't do that to her. I can't lose her again.

Groggily standing up from his seat, Angel's eyes were fixed in the direction of the Hotel doorway, the locked doors beckoning to him.

Forcing him to choose whether to permanently ruin his relationsh– his friendship with her, or start changes of which could possibly be bad for them both, but wonderful for him in the long run

It didn't matter. He just needed to see her smile again.

The rocket fire knocking on her front door woke Cordelia up with a start. What the hell?

She got up from her bed, padding into her living room wearing her dark gray pajama pants, and a short white tank top. The knocking continued, making her worry that there would soon be a hole in her door.

Wait. It's four in the morning. Not exactly time for the newspaper boy. Do they even have those in LA?

Cordelia quietly opened her closet near the door, gently removing the hand axe she kept there, a weapon which could actually kick some ass when used by her. Just ask Gunn's friend and his cracked skull about it.

Carefully, she unlocked the door, opening it. Angel would kill me if he found out I'm letting people in at this time of night - or morning. Whatever.

She stopped, hand resting against the door. Stared. Oh my God.

That's when Angel walked in, clad in his black leather glory, gathered her into his arms, grabbing her shoulders, and his lips – God bless those wonderful lips – crushed against hers.

read part 2