Author: Emilie
Rating: R *Language*
Disclaimer: I Don't own the characters, Joss Whedon does. I stole the name from a book I'm reading right now also.
Distribution: http://www.emiliekitten.com & OzMia. If you want it take it.
Feedback: Gimmie a F! Gimmie a E!.. well I won't put you through that. Just do it.
Pairings: W/O N/O
For Karen. You asked for this.. lol.
~*~
Nancy turned over again, shivering from a chill that ran up her spin she yanked the covers under her chin and sighed. She couldn't make herself sleep lately, when she finally did sleep confused images and haunting horrible dreams would attack her mind. They made her wake up in a cold sweat and never want to close her eyes again. She knew it wasn't healthy sleep was something that normal people needed. She needed it to keep herself running, to keep herself still on the thin thread of sanity she clung to so furiously.
She had to stay sane, sane for herself and for the people around her. Nancy knew if she let herself slip into insanity she would never be able to come back. She would be lost forever in the dark abyss, the very abyss that frightened her so much. She wasn't sure if she ever went over the edge anyone could pull her back, even Oz.
Oz was the person she held on to the tightest when she felt herself falling a part. Larry was there, he tried to help her but he never had the calm that Oz had. Larry always seemed to be on the move and babbling about some vampire fight he'd gotten into. But Oz never complained when they were up for days straight, he never tried to embellish a fight he got into and won. He was always straight forward and said what he was thinking but very little else.
They had been fighting the forces of darkness for months now, it had been like a cat and mouse and she was tiring of being a rodent. The vampires had carefully taken out all of their top hunters, Devon, Jonathon, Jesse, even Amy had been killed. The vampires had turned Devon to torment Oz it had done a job on him, but eventually Oz did what he had to do and staked Devon. From then on before every hunt they would all drink a vile of Holy water, it was a precaution but they didn't have any idea if it worked. Since Devon there hadn't been anymore white hat vampires though.
Nancy kicked the covers off of her, growing warm. She turned angrily trying to make herself sleep, the faces of her dead friends danced across the inside of her eyelids making it impossible for her to keep them closed. She saw Amy as they had found her, she had been placed on Oz's front porch her eyes had been torn from the sockets and her heart was lying in her lap, removed from her small rib cage. Nancy had vomited for what seemed like days, Oz and Giles had taken care of the body.
After Amy's death Nancy had sworn to herself she would never let that happen to her, she would never be prey to a vampire and never be easy to kill or defeat because she was a girl. She'd trained harder and as Jonathon and then Jesse had disappeared she Oz and Larry were all that was left, with Giles their bumbly British librarian leading them. They all knew how much of a joke they were to the demons of Sunnydale but they did what they had to do.
She had fallen for Oz the minute she'd seen him but promised herself that their mission was more important then some stupid crush. A few weeks ago though, it hadn't been possible to suppress her feelings. They had been trapped, Oz was nearly killed or at least that's what Nancy had thought. Rather then let him die without knowing she'd told him. Of course he survived, she swore he did that just to embarrass her. She didn't care though, they were the only happiness they knew anymore. They both relished the few hours they could be together, even if it was just sharpening stakes.
Then the dreams had started, each night they were a little more vivid and a little more terrifying. She pushed her thoughts aside, letting her eyelids drift shut. The sun would be up in a few hours, she could at least leave her mind blank. Maybe sleep would come, if she was lucky.
~*~
Nancy sat in the center of the lawn, her legs folded under her. She read a strange book about wolves and women and glanced up, spotting someone in a purple hat with blood red hair walking across the lawn towards her. The girl wasn't looking at her but at something beyond her, a hopeful yet shy look on her face. Nancy turned around to see what the girl was looking at and felt something in her heart yank, but she didn't recognize the boy sitting on the picnic table with a guitar across his lap.
It was obvious he was trying not to look like he was waiting for the girl, he kept glancing up in a offhandish way. Nancy smiled but she had no idea why, she heard the conversation through and then heard the impish girl as she was walking away.
"I said date!"
She watched the girl as she left and the boy just sat on the table looking dazed, Nancy went back to reading her book. When she looked up again she was in a dark room, again the boy was sitting with his guitar in his lap. He looked extremely sad, hurt. She felt for him and wanted nothing more then to go hug him and ask what was wrong. Before she could act on that want she felt herself move to another room, the same girl from the lawn was sitting on the floor in orange socks staring at what looked like a little pez witch. She too looked sad and lost like a little puppy.
The scene changed in a lightening strike, the boy was sitting at a computer typing away. The girl was frustrated slamming her book shut.
"Oh this is so frustrating!" She cried, she was looking for something Nancy understood. The conversation went on for a bit before the boy lunged forward, cupping the girls face and kissing her with a passion Nancy understood.
"Oz, what are you doing?"
"Panicking."
The room switched, shuddering violently Nancy buckled over as the sound of tears hit her ears. She looked up to see the boy and the girl standing in front of each other.
"Oz? Don't you love me?"
"My whole life, I've never loved anything else."
That's when she felt the terror enter her heart, it was hurting horribly for the girl. She was left sobbing on the floor of the room as the boy left. Nancy didn't understand it until the terror entered her mind. Howling rang through her ears and she felt like a animal was tearing her apart from the inside out. She fell to the floor in the pain and shock of the sounds, feeling the cold dirt beneath her fingers. She grasped a clump of it in her hands, screaming. The terror left her mind and she glanced up dazed.
"Willow Anne Rosenberg
1981-2000
You were loved."
Then the boy, Oz was there. Standing over the grave he didn't seem to see Nancy laying there on top of the fresh dirt. She knew she should move but couldn't seem to make herself, her body felt leaded to the ground. Realization dawned on her that this was the girl from all the visions, the one who had been so hurt.
The boy didn't look good, his hair was longer more wild. He had tears streaming down his face, she was shocked somehow to see him crying. He dropped to his knees in front of the grave where she lay watching his green eyes fly over the words on the tombstone. A guttural scream came from inside of him, a look of disbelief frozen on his face.
Nancy felt the terror come back to her mind as Oz continued to scream to the heavens unknown. She felt as if her brain was going to explode with the pain and the animal fury. The ground seemed to suck her down, into the mud where Willow was buried.
As the ground took her air away, Nancy began to feel herself black out. Terror ran through her veins and she felt hot tears running down her face and she sat up hysterically screaming and gasping for air. It took her a few moments to realize that she was home, in bed. Warm arms were holding her, trying to get her to calm down she recognized the soft murmuring voice. "Oz?"
"Yeah, I'm here." He said releasing her ever so slowly as if she would break if he moved too fast. Her dream flooded back to her, the girl.
"Oz, did you know a girl named Willow, Willow.. Rosenberg?" Oz gave her a confused look.
"Never mind.. just a.. nightmare. " She felt horribly stupid. "Oz what do you think it would have been like? If things were different?" She whispered leaning forward into him, he wrapped his arms around her again.
"I can't remember if it ever was different Nan. If I had my choice though, I wouldn't do anything different. I might not have met you." She sighed. "Why did you ask about Willow?"
She pulled away from him suddenly. "You knew her?"
"She was a freshman when I was a sophomore, she was killed the night the Master rose." It dawned on her, Willow was the masters pet. She ran around with that male vampire, they had been Jesses friends.
"Oh." Was all Nancy could say. She remembered the love she'd felt between them in the dream, knowing that even if things had been different Oz would have been unhappy and hurt. She remembered the terror she'd felt and shivered, Oz's grip on her tightened slightly and she felt safe.
~*~
Nancy lay back against her pillow, knocking the year book she had been glancing at off the bed. The picture of Willow Rosenberg was circled with a red marker, Nancy remembered her as a human. She'd been nice to everyone smartest girl in school and extremely pretty. Nancy wondered idly why she hadn't been changed instead of Willow. It would make more sense, Willow had everything Nancy didn't. Except for one thing, Oz.
Her eyelids grew heavy as sleep came, there was no struggle tonight. Her brain was at rest thinking that since she had had the most terrifying dream the night before that nothing would happen tonight and it would be peaceful sleep.
~*~
Nancy was slammed into a wall, the man in front of her was a scruffy version of her Oz and he was starring at her. Right at *her*.
"What are you doing here?" He growled, his voice was dangerous and low. He glared at her and his eyes were pure animal.
"I.. I don't know. Please your hurting me." She hated how she sounded, pitiful. She couldn't bring herself to say 'get your fucking hands off of me' to Oz though. No matter how he treated her.
"Get out." He said turning away and stalking over to a table in the middle of the shack. Nancy saw the picture sitting on the table of the Willow and Oz sitting on a pier talking. They looked so happy.
"She's going to die." It popped out of her mouth before it even entered her mind, Nancy gasped at what she'd said. Oz turned around glaring at her, his eyes flashing wildly. "Willow. She's going to die without you, hell she might die with you there but if you don't go back you'll regret it." She didn't know where the words were coming from, she didn't really want to think about it. Her mouth led her and her mind just took the backseat.
"How do you know Willow?" He questioned, he remembered the girl from somewhere.
"We... we were in high school together. Please don't ask, just go to her. She needs you. Its not worth it to stay here, you think your protecting her but Oz your killing her."
"Nancy? Nancy Doyle? You were in my trig class last year." Oz said ignoring her comments. She shrugged. "Sure."
"What the hell do you know about the situation with Willow?" Nancy felt her mind go into shock at Oz's harsh words.
"I know a lot more then you do, obviously, if your still here." She shot back, wondering where these words were coming from. Oz's eyes were on her like prey again.
"Get. OUT." His voice raised and Nancy didn't budge. He moved forward putting his hands on her shoulders and shacking her violently. "GET OUT."
"NO!" she screamed at the top of her lungs, grabbing his hands and holding them. She felt their minds connect and he knew everything she knew, felt everything she'd experienced. They both slid to the floor, Oz's face was twisted with emotion.
"She's going to die." He said, ignoring the relationship she treasured so much with him in her world. Whatever this place was, it wasn't her world she'd figured that out.
"You can save her, Oz. Go to her." He nodded, getting to his feet. The room darkened and blind panic crossed over Oz's face and he twisted forward, buckling. Nancy felt the pain as well, hair sprouted from everywhere on Oz's skin. He threw his animal head back and howled through the razor teeth. Nancy jolted herself awake.
~*~
"Nancy!" Larry cried as the vampire lunged at her, she leaped away from it and it bowled into the football player. They were both on the ground before Nancy could think she was on the back of the vampire plunging a stake into its heart.
"Thanks Nan." She nodded.
"No problem, nothing you wouldn't do for me right Lar?" she said with a smile climbing to her feet. Oz walked up from behind them. It had been a month and Nancy hadn't had another dream like the ones she'd had. "You okay?"
He nodded, his eyes shining. Suddenly there was a slightly panic in his eyes Nancy was about to question him when she felt herself thrown foreword, her skull connecting with a headstone. Her world went dark for a moment before becoming incredibly light. She was sitting on a huge pink bean bag sitting across from Willow.
"Thankyou."
"Huh?" She was confused and glanced around looking for someone else.
"Thankyou, you helped me. You brought Oz back to me." Nancy just stared at her.
"I cast a spell, stretching out my thoughts, trying to find someone that loved him as much as me. I found you, you love him. " She nodded slightly, waiting for Willow to continue.
"You were the only one who could make him come home, I helped a bit when you were in the cabin. But you did it. Thankyou."
"You cast a spell on me?" Nancy squeaked, guessing that Willow must be a witch.
"Yes, it was the only thing I could think of Nancy. You were the only one, I was going to die without him. Tara was poisoning me. But never mind that, its a different story. I'm sorry I had to knock you out the way I did but I couldn't seem to get through to your dreams. You probably won't believe this when you wake up, but know its real. You saved me. Thankyou." The room started to fade and Nancy struggled to stay.
Light seemed to surround Willow as she faded into oblivion. She closed her eyes against the bright light, wanting to say something more to Willow. She opened her eyes again and Oz's beautiful face filled her vision. He looked concerned and there was dust all over the both of them, she was bleeding also. She could feel the warm sticky goo covering her forehead.
"Oz." She breathed and hugged him. Larry was standing behind them, Oz hugged her after a moment. She knew he was shocked at her sudden public expression, she wasn't generally so open about it. "I love you." Larry blushed and walked away, Nancy was glad.
She pulled away slightly from Oz. "Are you okay?" he gingerly moved a lock of her hair away from her face.
"I am now."
~*~End~*~