1st September
Here we are again. Back at Hogwarts for another year of exams, rows and parties. I've been back for like two minutes I swear and I was forced to go out and do sodding prefect duties. Bloody typical. I hate being a prefect. All my friends got to stay in the warm common room while I had to traipse around the freezing cold corridors with Remus Lupin, who is nice admittedly (nicer than those stupid friends of his anyway) but not the most talkative of people. I ended up doing that really embarrassing thing where you babble like a lunatic just to fill the silence.
Plus, he looks really ill; he's all like pale and tired looking. Surely after six weeks off he should be looking all fresh and rejuvenated? I always look like a bag of crap by July because I'm tired and sick of exams and my face is always red because school uniforms are BOILING and I always burn and end up clashing with my hair.
But I'm normal looking in September.
And obviously last summer term was just AWFUL, the worst one ever-
No, I'm not going to think about that.
It was a really weird holiday without Sev Snape though. Normally he's buzzing around like a particularly irritating fly, but he had the common sense to keep out of my way this summer the greasy bastard. Probably hanging out with all his death eater mates. Well good. See if I even care!
Oops. I dotted that exclamation mark a little too hard and it made a hole in the paper.
I saw him on the train. He gave me this stupid little smile and pathetic wave, but I just ignored him. God he makes me mad.
He makes me so angry it makes me want to go out with Potter, just to annoy him. Then I remember that if I went out with Potter I'd probably kill him, which obviously wouldn't be a good idea. So I just content myself with various conversations which end with a satisfying punch on the nose. (His nose I mean, not mine.)
I have to stop writing now. Mary just threw a shoe at me and shouted that if I don't stop scratching away and keeping her awake she's going to hex me.
I'm going to do what she says. Mary's scary when she doesn't get enough sleep.
2nd September
Oh. My. God. I'm starting to think that taking NEWTs was a BIG mistake. Maybe I should have dropped out and gone to work at Madam Malkins.
I got 4 pieces of homework today. FOUR! And I'm only taking 5 subjects! And James frigging Potter is in both Charms and Transfig. And Slughorn was a total wanker and paired me up with Sirius Black in potions.
FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR.
Herbology was a total joke, completely overrun by Hufflepuffs. In fact the only non-Hufflepuffs are me, Evanna, Lupin and Carmelita Addinall, who's from Ravenclaw. Well, there's Parkinson and Rudd from Slytherin but they don't count because they spent the whole time feeling each other up.
The only good lesson was ancient runes and that was because me and Rivalee spent the whole time in fits of laughter over her ex-boyfriend (who was a cheating bastard) who has for some obscure reason dyed his hair orange.
4th September
Oh damnation. I've just found Petunia's bracelet in my trunk. How the hell did they get there? At least she has a new reason to hate me. I expect the salem-esque cry of "WITCH!" was getting a little tired.
The bracelet is this nasty cheap looking gold thing from her boyfriend, who she thankfully spent most of the summer with. His name is Vernon which I think says it all. I thought he was a bit on the chubby side, but whatever. She seems to like him.
Christ knows why, he's as boring as hell. He came round for dinner one time and I nearly fell asleep in my soup. I was telling Riva this in Runes today and winked and said "Maybe he's an animal in bed."
Ok, that is disgusting. Stupid sex-obsessed friend, who has kindly put images in my head that I don't want in there!!! I don't think an over active imagination helps either.
He is an animal, but not in the sick way that she means- he's a rude, fat pig.
I feel sick now. Thanks a bunch Riva.
7th September
Evanna's birthday
It was Eva's 17th birthday today. The stupid Marauders came up to us and sang happy birthday to her at breakfast. I'd have died of embarrassment, but Eva doesn't get embarrassed. She just sat there with one eyebrow raised. I wish I could do that. I tried practising in front of the mirror once, but I just looked like a wannabe Bond villain. And that wasn't really the look that I was going for to be honest.
I'm behind on homework already. I'm like the worst prefect ever. Plus I totally abuse my power by using it to put Slytherins in detention and in long queues and stuff.
It was so boring doing patrol this evening. Lupin looked like death warmed up, so I don't blame him for answering my babbles with "hmmm" and "yeah" and even the occasional "I know", but it was pretty dull.
10th September
Oh god oh god.
I've been able to drive Snape out of my head by ignoring him, but that tactic all went to hell today.
I was looking for a book to help me with my potions essay when I heard this cough behind me. I turned to see who was so rudely distributing their sick germs near me, saw it was Snape and turned around again immediately.
Snape: Hi.
Me: ...
Snape: Are you still not talking to me?
No, you stupid wanker, of course I'm still talking to you. Can't you hear me babble?
Snape: Lily, listen.
I started humming some muggle song that I heard on the radio all summer. I knew that Snape wouldn't recognise it, him having so much magical blood in him....not.
Snape: Lily, please.
Me: (hums louder)
Snape: Lily, I'm so, so sorry. I've really missed you...will you please listen to me?!
Me: (whips round) Leave me alone for god's sake! Just go away! I don't care! I don't care about your stupid apologies and your-your stupid "oh I've really missed you" and-and your...stupid...annoying..."Lily, Lily, Lily" all the fucking time-I just don't CARE!
I was getting pretty worked up by this point as you may have gathered and the words were just falling out my mouth without permission from my brain so I thought I'd better shut up.
I seized my book and went to push past him, but he grabbed my arm.
"Let. Go. Of. Me." I growled through gritted teeth. "I'll hex you, I swear."
"Please..." he began.
I wrenched my arm away and went for my wand but he got hold of both my hands and I couldn't pull away. He's a hell of a lot stronger than he looks you know, and lets face it I'm only like 5 foot 2 and barely strong enough to open a jar of pickled onions.
"Please listen to me." He pleaded. I just focussed my eyes on his hair. God, he has annoying hair. I mean, really would it kill him to wash it once in a while?
"I really miss you Lily." He went. "I'm your best friend."
I felt like crying. Stupid PMS.
"Was." I said harshly. "Let go of me Snape, please."
He let go of one hand, but gripped tightly onto the other. I'd dropped my book and it was lying by our feet. I'd hoped that it had landed on his toe, but no such luck.
"My book..." I whispered. "Let me go Sev, please, let me go." Oh goody, now I was bloody begging the greasy git to let me go.
"No, I-"
"Is there a problem?" My heart sank. I actually felt it move past my insides, down my leg coming to a gentle thudding halt in my shoes. James bloody fucking Potter was standing there, one eyebrow raised in a- though I hate to admit it- fairly attractive manner. I blushed.
Snape let me go straight away to my relief. It would have been so embarrassing if he'd made a scene. I grabbed the stupid book and wrapped my arms around it protectively, my face blood red.
"Goodbye Snape." I said stiffly and stalked off. I could hear Potter following me, but I couldn't look at him because I could feel the tears bubbling up. I checked out the book, shoved it in my bag (squashing an orange that was in there, just to cheer me up) and marched out.
Once I was out, I leaned against a wall, took a deep breath. "Thanks." I said, closing my eyes.
"That's ok." said Potter cautiously; obviously hoping I wasn't going to weep all over him. "Are you alright?"
Well, I didn't expect that. I just nodded tiredly. I didn't trust myself to speak just yet.
"So why were you and Sniv- Snape holding hands anyway?" he asked teasingly, trying to lighten the mood probably. I was just in the mood to go up to the tower, shout at someone, anyone, and then cry and eat chocolate to be honest.
"He was trying to apologise for last te-"I managed to choke out before bursting into tears, which was a disaster in itself. I don't cry very often, but when I do...Jesus I weep oceans. Plus my eyes go all puffy and all my eyeliner runs down my face and the end of my nose goes bright red and I can't talk and it's all horrible.
The next thing I knew, Potter was hugging me. Yes, you did read that right (Whoever 'you' are). James Potter wrapped his arms around me and gave me this massive bear hug. And I didn't hex him.
I don't know who was more surprised that I didn't me or him.
He pulled back once I was speaking English and not cry-ese. I was going to say something else, but then I noticed him looking awkwardly at a spot behind me. I turned slowly, half expecting to see You-Know-Who, half expecting to see Snape. I kind of hoped for you-know-who.
As if I'd be that lucky.
"All right Snape?" Potter said easily. Snape looked really pissed off and took a step forward and I lost my temper and started shouted insults.
Potter bundled me away before I got us banned from the library and we left Snape blinking like a goldfish.
14th September
So now I have detention. That's where I am now. McGonagall gave us lines, but that's too boring. I don't care about detention though it was kind of worth it.
It was chucking it down at lunchtime so we stayed in. The Marauders were being all twatty and flicking ink around and some of it landed on Riva who was all like "My hair!" and then on Eva who was shouted "BOLLOCKS! My eye!!"
So, obviously then we had to retaliate, and pretty soon it was all out war. Then Black hit Snape by "accident" and so it turned into Gryffindor vs. Slytherin with several Ravenclaws on our team too. Snape looked really hacked off to see me having a good time with Potter so I made sure I laughed a lot.
Potter though, the complete prick, dumped a load on my head so I have massively huge black splodges in my hair. In revenge I poured it all down the back of his shirt and in his bag for later. Ha ha ha.
Anyway McGonagall came in and gave us all a right bollocking. Me, Lupin and that Slytherin knob Nott also got letters home because we're prefects and "should be setting a good example, not blatantly disregarding rules". Although technically there is no rule banning ink fights. But I didn't think it wise to tell McGonagall this. I don't fancy having double detention.
20th September
Black blew our potion up today. It was hilarious.
He put essence of catfish in while the potion was on boil. I TOLD him to wait until was cool, but did he listen?
Bollocks did he.
It would have been very, very, VERY annoying...if it hadn't landed on that spoilt Daddy's girl Narcissa Black and dyed patches of her skin green. And burnt her eyebrows off. I was actually doubled over laughing. Me and Black were just clinging onto each other, crying with laughter...her face!!!
Still, they'll grow back, I'm sure. And Slughorn promised Narcissa that the green would fade quickly.
In a few weeks or so.
Shame.
23rd September
Narcissa Black really has it in for me now. I couldn't care less, but it is pretty amusing watching her try to come up with witty comebacks.
27th September
Ew!!! Caught that little pervert Pettigrew looking down my top today at lunch, when I leaned over for some chips. I sat back really quickly with only about three chips and pulled on my jumper even though it was boiling in the hall today. About a minute later I saw Lupin smack Pettigrew round the back of a head with a newspaper and Black offered me the bowl of chips.
30th September
O...Kay....
Had a very, very, very, very, VERY weird dream last night. Still slightly weirded out by it.
So, I dreamt that I was going out with Snape (ew!!!!!) and that he cheated on me with Dumbledore (what?!?!) and Potter came and kicked his arse (Snape's I mean, not our esteemed and ancient headmaster) for cheating on me and then I went out with Potter.
Huh??????
I told Mary, Eva and Rivalee in Charms. They nearly wet themselves laughing. I don't know why. It's not even funny.
Good friends.
Once Rivalee had calmed down she said (seriously) that my dream obviously was reflecting real life.
And I was like that is such crap because a) Snape is the last person that I would ever want to go out with and b) Snape is the last person that I would ever want to go out with. Seriously, I'd rather marry You-Know-Who. I'd rather marry James Potter!
And Rivalee got all huffy because she loves Divination and is taking it at NEWT and believes all of that shite and I only took it because it was that or muggle studies and obviously being a muggle born there's not much point me taking it and I failed it because I sat at the back with Evanna and pissed around or went to sleep on Lupin's shoulder and so when it got to the exam I didn't even know what topics we'd even covered over the whole two years, so obviously I got a T. Maybe I should have taken muggle studies. I could have sat at the back and pissed around with Mary and fallen asleep on Black's shoulder instead. And got an O.
Anyway, so she was spouting some rubbish about how my affection or preference or something had moved from Snape to Potter. Yeah, ok.
"And that Dumbledore is gay." giggled Mary.