The disclaimer telling all of you that I don't own Adventure Time characters has gone off somewhere. Just an idea of some of poor Simon's past with the crown.
Too Far Gone
I know my mind is changing... but I'm already too far gone to know what to do. I want people to know that... if I do things... if I do things that hurt anyone, please... please forgive me…
Simon Petrikov shut off the video camera. Once again he was recording the drastic changes happening to his body.
He shuddered at the thought of it. Absently he looked at his reflection in a full length mirror in his apartment. He barely recognized himself. His once olive skin was an unhealthy shade of blue. His brown eyes were now almost completely white yet there was no blindness. On the contrary, his eyesight seemed to steadily improve. His once impeccably groomed hair was almost to his shoulders, wilder and turning white. His clean cut face now sported a bushy white mustache and strands of a beard were starting to grow on his chin.
No matter how many times he shaved a day the beard and mustache grew back stronger than ever. He had tried for weeks to control the facial hair by shaving, using Betty's old Nair that she left behind, even waxing but no luck at all. He had given up that morning, realizing that any attempt at grooming was an effort in futility.
The worst thing of all was to his horror was that his nose was growing. Like some demented parody of Pinocchio. And it was pointed of all things.
Simon rarely went out anymore. He was too ashamed and terrified about what was happening to him to show himself to the outside world. When he did go out for food he bundled himself up head to toe completely.
Not that anyone objected to his choice of clothing. Seeing that it had been snowing for months almost non-stop.
"Hold on…" Simon took the crown off his head and looked outside. At the steady snowfall covering the city where he lived. "Something isn't right here."
For the first time for what seemed like forever Simon realized that it was supposed to be summer. He turned to his computer and checked the date. It was the middle of August. And all over the Internet were stories about how baffled scientists were about the freak endless series of snowstorms that was covering the city. Even the war which had been going on for years seemed secondary due to this strange phenomenon.
Even with the crown off it was still snowing briskly. "Stop it…" He pleaded but not to himself. "Stop it! Stop it!"
Why? Isn't this what you wanted? A voice soft and sweet came to his mind. To feel comfortable?
"I did this…" Simon was horrified. "I…No, I couldn't!" He looked at the crown. "Why?"
You don't belong with them anymore…A different voice nagged at his mind. He wasn't sure if it was the crown or his own. If you stay here you'll only bring destruction and death.
"What do you mean by them?" Simon asked aloud.
What do you think I mean? The harsh voice sneered. Do I have to spell it out for you Simon the Simpleminded? Fine. Human. You don't belong with humans. There I said it!
"I AM HUMAN!" Simon yelled at the voice inside his head. He dropped the crown on the floor in childish defiance.
Something faint and purple with several legs flitted across the room. Another one of the strange visions Simon was subjected to more and more frequently ever since his eyes had changed color to white. It looked like a three eyed caterpillar.
"Human? Really?" The creature scoffed as if it heard him. "Yeah, right!"
"Who's human?" A small yellow whale with several fins on its body flew in.
"That guy," The purple three eyed caterpillar pointed. "Well he thinks he's human!"
"He's not a human," The whale spoke. "If he was really human he wouldn't be able to see into the twenty seventh dimension!"
"Well duh Steve!" The purple three eyed caterpillar rolled his eyes.
"This is all in my mind! This is all in my mind!" Simon sat on the floor, pulled his knees up to his chest and closed his eyes. He pulled on his rapidly growing beard trying to yank it out. "Not real! Not real! Not real!"
"Uh actually we are," Steve spoke up. "We're creatures that live between parallel dimensions. Humans can't see us. Most people can't. Only wizards can. Which means you're probably a wizard."
"Or turning into one," The Purple Caterpillar spoke up.
"How do you turn into a wizard?" Steve asked. "I mean technically they're a whole different species. You have to be born into it right?"
"We should get Jeff in here. He knows all about this stuff," The purple caterpillar said. "Hey Jeff! Jeff! could you come in here for a minute?"
"Hey Kevin, Steve what's going on?" A green snake like creature with a red head and a birdlike beak floated through the wall.
"Is that guy human or a wizard?" Kevin the Purple Caterpillar asked. "I mean he was human a while ago…"
"This isn't happening! This isn't happening…" Simon whimpered.
"Oh yeah. That's a new wizard all right," Jeff said.
"See I told you Jeff knew his stuff," Kevin nodded.
"I can't be a wizard! How is this possible?" Simon looked at his hands.
"From the looks of things I'm guessing that culprit is that crown over there," Jeff floated to the crown. "Yup, that's a cursed object all right. That'd do it."
"Cursed…" Simon blinked at the apparitions.
"Okay obviously you are very new to this so I'll give you the watered down version," Jeff said. "You're almost halfway becoming a wizard. Not wizard like those Harry Potter movies but an actual wizard. It's a species of humanoid that can use special forces of elemental harmonics AKA Magic."
"Wizard?" Simon blinked.
"To put it in terms you can understand power wise it's above mutant, equal to a lesser demon but below a major demon or a seraph," Jeff explained. "Of course they're all above human so the bright side is you're moving up on the evolution scale."
"No…This is obviously a delusion of my mind," Simon shook his head. "Magic doesn't exist! It's not real."
"Okay smart guy then how do you explain turning into a tall version of Papa Smurf?" Jeff asked. "And yes we get TV in our dimension. So we know a lot of stuff."
"Pretty much all we can do is fly around and watch stuff," Kevin explained. "It's kind of a tradeoff. We're practically immortal and all-knowing and seeing but we can't touch anything outside of our dimension."
"No, this can't be…." Simon then felt a sharp twinge in his hands. "AAAHH!"
He watched to his horror his fingers became slightly longer and his nails became more pointed. "Claws?" Simon gasped.
"Claws are part of the package," Jeff explained. "Especially for an ice wizard. Easier for you to grip cold things."
"Ice wizard? There hasn't been one of those on Earth for a couple of millennia," Steve was surprised.
"Well there's one now," Kevin said.
"No, no, no, no…" Simon whimpered.
"Did I mention baby wizards are extremely annoying?" Jeff groaned.
"Yeah I think we've figured that part out," Kevin nodded.
"Aww poor little guy," Steve said. "There's got to be something we can do."
"You know there isn't," Jeff said. "This isn't a Disney cartoon. We can't take care of him."
"Oh," Steve said. "In that case you wanna go get some hot wings?"
"I could eat," Kevin said.
"You can always eat," Jeff said as the apparitions flew away. "I tell you one thing you are not sticking me with the tab this time!"
Simon curled up into a ball on the floor and wept. "I don't want to be a wizard…" He sobbed. "I just want to be me again…"
Days passed. Or was it weeks? More changes happened to Simon. Not only had his beard started to grow thicker and fuller and his nose even larger and more pointed, another distressing change had overcome him. He woke up with a pain in his mouth. To his horror one of his teeth fell out and was almost instantly replaced by something completely inhuman. It was a sharp fang, almost like a shark's tooth. Within a few days almost every single tooth fell out of his mouth, replaced by the sharp fangs.
Still think you're human? The mocking voice returned.
"No…" Simon moaned as he spat out blood all over the sink in his bathroom. "Help…I need help."
Sure Simon, just run out to the dentist. The mocking voice quipped. I'm sure they'd love to get a good look at you!
"Help me…" Simon sunk to the floor. "Somebody help me…"
Help you? Simon there's a freaking war going on! The mocking voice snarled. They're too busy killing each other to even consider helping their fellow man. Let alone someone like you…
Just put me on my king, He heard the crown whisper from his bedroom. You'll feel better. I promise.
Hey let's all go to the hospital so every doctor in town can see what a freak you are! The mocking voice taunted.
You are not a freak. You are my king. Let me help you…I'll make the bad voices go away…
Simon honestly could not remember how the crown got in his hands. Put me on…And the voices of doubt will go away…
What followed was pure bliss. No pain, no anger, no doubt…just pure peace and a comforting breeze. He felt cool and comfortable as the snow danced around him, embracing him. To him the snow felt like a well worn blanket full of love and comfort.
He didn't know why but the cold just made him feel good. It made him feel strong and safe. The voice of crown started telling him secrets of the snow and frost, gently like a patient lover. And he listened. Listened to the voice teaching him, comforting him, initiating him into a power he had never dreamed of.
And it felt good. Better than any physical pleasure he could ever imagine.
His jaw no longer hurt. In fact his entire body felt invigorated as he danced around the apartment. He was so giddy he felt as if he were flying for a moment.
He spun around wildly laughing. The wind was singing to him. Singing songs of snow and power.
Wait…Wind? What wind?
Something jarred inside Simon. Impulsively he knocked the crown off his head. He found himself in his ice and snow covered apartment. The sounds of furious honking and sirens could be heard outside his open window.
Wait, the window was open?
He went to the window and looked out. What shocked him was what he saw on the road next to his apartment. Dozens of cars were trapped in the snow in the middle of the street. People were struggling to get out. Ambulances and police cars were trying to get to the vehicles with little or no success.
Another day another thirty car pileup on the freeway, The mocking voice quipped. Wow Simon you really know how to pile it on don't you?
"NO!" Simon shut the window hard and collapsed on the floor. "I didn't mean it…I didn't mean it…"
An awful realization came to him. "Why did you do that?" Simon yelled at the crown.
Why did you? The crown only did what you wanted…The mocking voice told him.
"It's not safe for me to be here anymore," Simon realized that once again he would have to lose another piece of himself. With a heavy heart he got up from the floor, went to the closet and pulled out a large backpack. "I can't be around anyone…"
Then he stopped. "But if I leave how will Betty find me?" He whispered.
She's not coming back for you! She's never coming back! Your precious princess abandoned you! A new voice screamed at him. It was shrill and angry like a jealous lover. She left you when you needed her the most! Is that what you call love?
You don't have to leave…Stay here and I will help you create a palace, The voice of the crown called out.
A palace over the frozen corpses of everyone in the city…The mocking voice told him.
A hard knock at his apartment door startled him. "Wh-Who is it?" Simon gulped.
"Mr. Petrikov? I'm with the city defense patrol!" A man's voice called out. "Your apartment building has lost all power. This entire block is being evacuated due to the storm."
"O-Okay…" Simon gulped. "Just let me p-pack and I'll be out of here."
"Do you need assistance, Sir? You don't sound all right."
"NO! I mean…" Simon caught himself. "I'm…I'm just coming down with a little cold."
Understatement of the year…The mocking voice snickered.
"Shut up!" He hissed to himself.
"Did you say something sir?"
"I said I'll hurry up!" Simon said loudly. "Just uh…give me half an hour and I will be out of here."
"Sir, I have orders to personally check every apartment in this building and make sure everyone is evacuated."
"Uh…" Simon's mind raced as he grabbed some clothes and some supplies. "You know… There's this little old lady in a wheelchair about two floors up. You should check on her first. I'll be fine. Just packing…"
"Sir you're the only person left in this building," The man called out. "Everyone else evacuated at the beginning of the storm three days ago. Didn't you notice that?"
"No, not really…" Simon gulped as he packed his camera next as well as a few pictures and books. "Don't get too many visitors. Uh…I'm just packing. I'm packing!"
"Sir, I am going to have to order you to open the door and let me in," The man said with authority.
"Uh please don't bother," Simon nervously grabbed the crown without thinking off the floor. "Place is a bit of a mess…"
"Sir if you don't open this door I will have no choice but to get the police and open it forcefully and…"
"NO! No I mean I'm coming! I'm opening the door…" Simon gulped. He saw a large blanket and draped it over his head, trying to hide his face. "Just…don't freak out okay? Please just don't freak out."
"Sir, what is going on here?" The man called out.
"Nothing…" Simon was trying not to panic as he approached the door. "Just please don't freak out."
"Sir open the door right now!"
"Okay! Okay! Oh this is not going to be good!" Simon moaned as he unlocked the door.
On the other side was a young beefy man in a green uniform. "Sir…I must insist you…What the devil happened in here?" The man shouldered past Simon and looked at the ice covered apartment.
"Uh we had a small leak," Simon gulped trying to hide his face. "Window was open. Nothing to worry about. I've got insurance. So…"
"What the…Your hands are blue!" The man gasped. "Sir you need to get to a hospital!"
"No! No please no hospitals! I'm fine!" Simon tried to hide.
"What are you hiding?" The man grabbed the blanket and yanked it off, revealing Simon's face. "Mother of…What are you?"
"Please! Please! Don't freak out!" Simon pleaded dropping the blanket and still holding the crown. "I'll go away! Please just don't…"
"What the hell have you got there you freak? Freeze!" The man pulled out his weapon.
"NO! YOU FREEZE!" Simon yelled with a rage he never knew he had putting the crown on his head. The next thing Simon knew the man was on the floor and covered in snow.
"Oh no! No! No!" Simon knocked off the crown and picked up the man. He was unconscious, but alive.
"Oh good! He's not dead!" Simon gasped. "Oh thank…"
"Carlson! Carlson! Where are you?" The Man's communicator on his belt crackled to life. "Carlson come in!"
"Uh this is Carlson," Simon grabbed the communicator and talked into it. He tried to imitate the man's gruff voice. "I am fine. How are you?"
"Carlson is that building evacuated yet?" The man on the other line asked.
"Uh yes, yes it is! There's no one here!" Simon said. "Everything's fine. I can honestly say that no one is here and there is no need for backup."
"Are you sure?" The man asked skeptically. "You sound a little funny."
"Oh I'm just a little cold," Simon looked at the unconscious snow covered man. "I'm getting a cold! Yeah I'm getting a cold. That's why I sound so funny."
"Not surprised with the damn weather," The man grumbled. "Everywhere else it's 80 degrees and here it's snowing like Hell froze over!"
"Okay so I'm uh…Going to go to the next building…After I uh…Get this old lady's cat!" Simon couldn't stop lying. Before he could stop himself he made the sound of a cat.
"You're chasing a cat?" Man on the other end was stunned.
"Uh yeah this old lady in a wheelchair won't leave until I get her cat," Simon went on as he picked up the crown and kept talking. "You know how old ladies are!"
"I thought you said everyone had evacuated the building?"
"Uh they did. She's in front of the building," Simon cradled the communicator with his shoulder and neck and he tried to pull Carlson out of the apartment. "She can't get in because of the wheelchair and I said I'd look for her cat and I am. There it goes!"
"Meow! Meow!" Simon made meowing noises as he pulled Carlson out of the apartment and into the hallway. "Hey get back here cat!"
He dropped Carlson and went down the hall. "Did you find my kitty?" Simon made an old woman's voice as he muffled the communicator to make it seem more realistic.
"I'm getting your kitty Mrs…" He looked at the next apartment which had a name on it. "Stinson! Mrs. Stinson I'm getting your cat! Please evacuate to the nearest shelter!"
"Not without my kitty," Simon did the old woman's voice again.
"I see the kitty! It uh…Went into this closet!" Simon tried the door and to his relief it wasn't locked. "Here's your kitty Mrs. Stinson! Meowww! Agh! Darn thing scratched me!"
"Carlson we don't have time for you to waste with stupid cats!" The man at the other end yelled.
"Well what do you want me to do?" Simon kept up the charade. "The woman won't leave without her cat and I got the cat! So that's that! Meow! Bad cat!"
"Carlson…Have you been drinking again?"
Simon waited a beat. "Yes I have!" Simon said emphatically. "I have been drinking…To combat the cold and I am really tired and I am going to lay down for a minute to take a break because I am obviously not feeling well from the cold and chasing cats all day! So if you hear me talking later about cats and strange blue men that shoot snow from their hands that's obviously the sauce talking! Over and out!"
"Carlson! Carl…" Simon shut off the communicator.
"Smooth man," Jeff reappeared in Simon's sight. "Real smooth."
"Oh shut up!" Simon snapped as he dragged Carlson into the next apartment. "Unless you can say something helpful I suggest you scram!"
"Geeze no need to get touchy," Jeff flew into the wall and disappeared.
"Oh no I'm just losing my mind, my humanity and now my home!" Simon snapped as he closed the door on the other apartment, leaving Carlson and taking the communicator with him. "Forgive me if I'm not my usual cheerful self!"
You idiot, now you have to leave! The mocking voice snarled as Simon went back to his apartment. Not just to save the stupid losers that live in this city but to save yourself! What do you think these people will do to you once they figure out you're the one responsible for all the snow?
"All the destruction…all the damage the snow caused," Simon was horrified. "It's all my fault!"
You're just lucky no one has been killed. Yet…The mocking voice told him.
That won't matter my king, The soft voice was back again. They'll hurt you. You must flee before they find you.
They'll lock you up in a cage where you belong, The mocking voice taunted.
"Not if I get out of here!" Simon snapped. He finished packing as fast as he could. He made a loop around his belt wth a smaller belt and hung the crown from it. He took one last frantic look at his apartment before he closed the door. He placed Carlson's communicator on the floor outside the apartment he put Carlson in.
Just as Carlson staggered out the door. "Oh dang you are real!" Carlson gapsed.
Without thinking Simon whipped the crown onto his head and shot another blast of snow and ice at the Carlson, knocking him back into the apartment. Then he closed the door of the apartment and iced it shut. "Sorry! Sorry…" Simon fought the crown's influence as Carlson yelled, banging at the door. Then he iced the door on his apartment shut before taking off the crown.
Don't worry my king, the voice of the crown spoke softly. Now your things will be safe until we return. And you have such nice pretty things. Not as pretty as me of course…But they will be safe until you come back.
"Where…Where am I going to go?" Simon wondered aloud as he went down the stairs, trying desperately to ignore the angry yells of Carlson.
Into your future, Simon. Into your future…The crown spoke to him.
"Why does something tell me I'm not going to like it very much?" Simon groaned as he fled the building.