Title: Things You Ought to Know
Rating: A
Summary: Of all the things you ought to know, this is most important: nothing could ever stop me from loving you – in my life, you were the best thing that ever happened.
Disclaimer: This story almost never got posted – it was only recently when I realized this theme was recently used in a semi-popular (ok, possibly almost hit) movie. I had no clue about the movie or the theme, and only recently saw it – this story was long done by then, and Cheryl told me to post it regardless, so…
Dedication: I couldn't post this without thanking Cheryl, who sat up until 5:30 in the morning bouncing this (and other) story ideas. Ringing in the New Year together was a fabulous treat, during an otherwise blah winter. Also, I'd like to say a special thank you to Kathy for her input and encouragement. Without her, Niles would have had an 'icky' disease, and no use of his 'bits'. (I've since decided that Kathy is officially now titled 'Official Defender of Niles' bits'.)
Niles couldn't pinpoint the exact moment when his world started to spin off axis.
For the longest time, he had been telling people that he was exhausted from the move and trying to set up a new home, in a new state with a climate hotter than hell itself. He hated certain things about California – the heat being the worst of them.
Settling in was one thing, but he also was a newly wed, and CC and Niles wasted no time in exercising muscles neither knew they had. Romance was critical, and they spent their evenings pleasantly exhausted, cuddled in each other's arms.
As CC grew more and more pregnant, his exhaustion kicked up a notch. He was sleeping beside a woman who would have given world-class kick-boxers a run for their money, and he took the brunt of her midnight rounds.
Still, sleeping somewhere else wasn't a possibility – they loved this time too much, and even in her fitful sleep there had been a serenity about her that he knew was all his. Nobody else saw her like this – this she reserved especially for him.
When Claire was born, there was even more exhaustion. Aside from everything else he was trying to tackle, he was of taking care of a new baby, and a wife who was particularly moody.
17 hours of excruciating labor, four threats of divorce, and two threats of lawsuits for assault with a deadly weapon later - which Niles found much too entertaining, earning himself a slap from his angry, sweaty wife – they had a beautiful baby girl, perfect in every way.
They were also clinging to the last strands of their sanity, wishing they had done this sooner, when they were both younger and more resilient.
But this was life, and life was meant to be busy and chaotic, and sometimes overwhelming. The fact that he was tired, after almost two years of this breakneck pace, hadn't surprised him at all.
Still, Niles found himself slowing down – he felt the drag of sleepless nights, combined with ferocious lovemaking and exhausting days full of commitments.
His writing practically lurched to a stop, his creativity completely quashed by the urge to sleep, and when he wasn't taking care of the baby, or taking care of CC, he found himself collapsed on the familiar green leather sofa that used to rest in the Sheffield office.
He was getting older - there was no denying that. He was living the life of a thirty-year old, but his body was quickly pushing sixty, and he couldn't trick it.
Family life wasn't going to be easy, and he knew that, but some days he wished it could be just a little easier – a little less stressful and terrifying.
Being tired was becoming his standard, and being exhausted was no longer a surprise occurrence, but what was frustrating was that his exhaustion was encroaching on every aspect of their lives.
Niles was so tired he rarely had the energy to do much more than hand over the baby when CC got home, and then he'd go to his office under the guise of working. Stretching out on the sofa, he would grab a notepad and write a few lines before nodding off restlessly.
He felt old, and for Niles that was not acceptable. He had a young, vibrant wife who loved him, and a daughter who was barely 20 months old, and just starting to build her own distinctive personality.
Being old was not acceptable.
Instead of slowing down, Niles decided that what he needed to do was push himself. It was a matter of only being as old as he felt, and even though he felt 90, he was sure that it wouldn't last. He just needed to push himself into action, and hope that momentum would carry him until whatever dark cloud was drifting over him disappeared.
Things were too perfect in his life to be a spectator. He didn't want to watch it go by, so instead, Niles decided he would outrun his age.
After an initial guilt period where he allowed himself to rest, Niles pushed himself back to the grind, fitting in as many things as he could into every day. If he didn't stop, he wouldn't be tired.
He hoped.
The only problem was that he never felt any better, or any younger. If anything he felt increasingly exhausted, and less able to face the next task.
Niles hadn't realized how much of a problem it was until he was driving home from the daycare, having decided to drop Claire for the extra day so he could catch up on chores, and try to prepare for their evening.
There was still about a half dozen errands to run, not the least of which was picking up groceries on his way back from picking up documents CC needed from their lawyer.
Glancing down at his lap, Niles looked at the note he had jotted, trying to remember all the chores he had left to do.
Looking at the list, he had a hard time focusing on the words. He could see them, but something wasn't right.
Straining to see more clearly, he looked again, and realized that he had forgotten to pick up the dry cleaning that CC had been asking about for days. He'd forgotten again.
Sighing, he decided it would be best left until the end of the day when he could pick it up on his way home from picking up Claire – it would mean toting her around with him while he went in, but it wasn't a huge inconvenience.
Niles barely heard the horn honking before he saw a car headed toward him from the passenger side. In the split second, he realized he had run a red light, and was now squarely in the intersection, his car on path for a collision.
He needed to do something – but as quickly as it was all happening, time seemed to be at a halt. Feeling the car being hit from behind, Niles braced himself for what was going to come next – the spinning had to stop eventually.
The car rocked back and forth, as it spun and he heard horns honking around him. It felt as if it would never stop, but a moment later, it hit something hard and the airbags deployed, pushing him back into his seat and winding him.
Trying to catch his breath, he opened his eyes, his heart racing at the mere thought of what just happened. He didn't want to see what he hit – God forbid it was another car.
He hadn't been paying attention – he had been too consumed by his note. But it was something he had done thousands of times before, and never had he had so much as a fender bender.
Reaching for his seatbelt, Niles unclasped it, and finally looked to the passenger side of the vehicle. All of the airbags had deployed, creating a curtain effect, but he could distinctly see a lamppost, creating a vicious indentation in the side of his new Jeep.
A sudden frantic tapping on the window jarred him from what he was looking at, trying to process.
"Are you OK?" a young guy called through the glass, his face flushed. The running gear that the winded man sported was one of Niles least favorite parts of living in California, looking like a kaleidoscope of colors, his eyes were unable to focus.
Niles nodded, unable to speak. What the hell just happened?
Pushing on the handle, he opened the door, face to face with the jogger. "I'm fine," he said finally, as much for himself as for the stranger.
He pulled himself to his feet, supporting his weight on the door frame. "I don't know what happened," he admitted, and for a moment he could see the look of concern in the jogger's expression. He was looking at a confused, old man. "I didn't see the red light."
"You're lucky," he said, taking in the damage. "Somebody's already called 911 – they're sending an ambulance. You should probably sit until they get here."
Looking at his car, Niles was starting to see the full extent of the damage. His almost brand new Jeep was crunched in several spots and was firmly planted against the post.
A second car was parked just behind him, but the passenger was clearly the phone, speaking frantically and gesturing maniacally. That must have been the car that hit him.
But something was wrong…
He had been headed to the house, before he went to the Lawyer's office, which was south of here. How'd his car end up turned north? Looking out to the road, he realized that the spinning wasn't just a dramatic imagination, but the result of his car actually spiraling across traffic.
"Shit."
"You sure you're ok? Do you need a drink or something? You look awful pale. Or should you call someone to come meet you?" Looking between Niles and the car, the fact that he was conscious was a good sign – though miraculous by itself.
"CC. She's going to kill me." She had lectured him a thousand times about his supposed ability to multitask, and here was a perfect demonstration of exactly what she was talking about. He hated when she was right.
As he took his cell phone from his pocket, he thought about the events, trying to remember the precise point where it went wrong, where things spun out of control, quite literally. The problem was, the entire series of events was quickly becoming a blur – his focus instead shifted to dialing the number that he had dialed at least a thousand times before.
"You know, I spoke to you forty minutes ago – what could have possibly changed?" CC groaned, clearly frustrated by the interruption.
"Sorry," he managed, his voice quivering. In that moment, he realized just how bad the accident could have been. "I uh, need you to pick up Claire today," he said simply, trying to keep his thoughts in line. There was so much going on around him that he could barely concentrate.
"Niles! You know I have meetings until 6 – we talked about it this morning. We talked about this again forty minutes ago when you called to ask me what I wanted for dinner." Her irritation was evident, and he couldn't blame her. In fact, as soon as she heard the whole story, who knew how she'd respond?
"I'm sorry, baby. I know you're busy – and I'm sorry to add to that." Glancing back at the car, he swallowed and reminded himself to take a breath. "I had a little car accident; there's no way I can drive it anywhere – and I know how the daycare hates it when we're late."
There was silence on the other end of the line, and for a moment he wondered how she'd respond. The potential for her to blow up seemed lessened by the gravity of his news, but for reason escaping understanding, he was terrified at the prospect none-the-less.
"Are you okay?" she asked, her tone distinctively softer, concern evident.
"I'm fine," he replied easily. "Just shaken. But the car… wasn't so lucky." Police cars arrived and blocked off the intersection, where one car was still stopped. He heard sirens everywhere, drowning out the crowd that was growing. Looking around, he wondered if anyone was hurt. Maybe they weren't as lucky as he had hoped.
"Niles? Niles, answer me… what happened?" He could hear the concern in her voice.
"I'm sorry?"
"I asked you what happened… Didn't you hear me?"
Wincing at the thought of the accident, the damage to the car, and that he had to interrupt her day, Niles wondered how it all happened. "I'm sorry – the police are here. I really am sorry. I just have to clear this up, and figure out what's happening to the car. And… I'm sure there are things I should take care of. I need to go."
"Oh. Should I come pick you up?"
The mere thought made his heart race; the last thing she needed was to see his crumpled car. "No, no… it's fine. I'm really sorry, CC."
"Okay, um, I'll cancel an appointment and sneak out to pick her up. You're really okay? You don't sound very good."
"I'm fine," he promised her. "Love you." Snapping his phone closed, Niles looked around the chaos, and waited for the police officer to make it to his car. Surely at the very least, he'd have to make a statement, and make arrangements with his insurance.