Hermione sighed, watching her best friend with sadness and anticipation. She and her two friends had come to the Weasley's in preparation for Bill and Fleur's wedding soon after Harry's 17th birthday. The stay at the Dursley's had been miserable until Ron finally lost his temper, giving Dudley another pigtail. Afterwards the Dursleys were sickeningly polite to them, obviously mortified one of them might lose their temper again. When it finally came time to say goodbye, absolutely every person from their trio could honestly say that they were happy to see the back of that horrid family.
Harry still hadn't moved from his vigil, staring unblinkingly out the window. The events of the past three years kept playing horribly over and over again in his mind. He could dimly feel another set of eyes watching him, and found he didn't care. Nothing much mattered anymore, except the mantra he kept repeating over and over in his mind; "the locket…the cup…the snake…something of Gryffindor's or Ravenclaw's…."
Ron came and sat down beside Hermione, giving her a meaningful glance. She sighed, answering the silent question. "No, he still hasn't moved. He's been staring out that window for nearly an hour."
Ron sighed, before calling out, "Harry? Hey, mate, do you want to go de-gnome the garden?"
Harry didn't respond, instead continuing to stare unblinkingly out the window. His mouth was moving now, and Hermione and Ron could just barely make out, "The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Gryffindor's or Ravenclaw's…."
Ron sighed, standing up and making his way from the room. Harry had been distant ever since June. Then again, Ron couldn't really blame him. It was hard enough for him to attend Dumbledore's funeral. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to watch him die, and be helpless to stop it. Just like when Sirius….
He shook his head, reminding himself that Harry needed him right now. He couldn't start thinking depressing thoughts, and close himself off. Without realizing it, he had already entered the kitchen. Pulling out his wand he began casting the spells to make a decent dinner, half surprised his mother hadn't already started. He banished this thought however, when he remembered that his mother was probably putting the last minute touches on the wedding gown's or something. Everything was changing.
Dinner that night was a tense affair. Mrs. Weasley kept shooting anxious looks in Harry's direction, and trying to pile more food onto his plate, all of which he refused to eat. Fred and George usually helped lighten the mood, but they were working late with some new project at the joke shop. Mr. Weasley was dealing with "protection amulets" that were being sold in Diagon Alley, and hadn't been seen all day. There was a feeling of loneliness on the table with so many missing members, no matter how hard Mrs. Weasley tried to cheer everyone up.
"Harry, what's the matter? You haven't said a word all night," asked Mrs. Weasley, sneaking some more potatoes onto his plate.
Harry glanced upwards with a nonchalant expression, shrugging his shoulders. Ginny narrowed her eyes, watching him closely. She knew Harry was hiding something, and she was determined to find out what.
"Yeah, Harry, you didn't even want to play Quidditch this afternoon," she prompted, waiting for his reaction.
"Didn't feel like it."
That, more then anything, alerted the whole table to the fact that Harry was hiding something. Never in his life had he acted so uncaring towards Quidditch.
Finally Mrs. Weasley spoke in a careful tone, keeping her voice soothing. "Harry, dear, I know Dumbledore's death was a heavy blow for you, but you have to-"
It was as though a dam holding back all of Harry's emotions suddenly burst open. He got to his feet, face contorted in pain and fury. "Let go? Is that what you want me to do, let go? HOW CAN I LET GO! IT'S MY FAULT HE'S DEAD! JUST LIKE IT WAS MY FAULT WHEN SIRIUS DIED! HE DIDN'T DESERVE THAT! IT WASN'T HIS TIME!"
A stunned silence fell over the table. Bill dropped his fork, food apparently forgotten. Harry was surprised at himself at his sudden outburst, but found he didn't regret it. It was long past the time he should've let it all go.
"MY PARENTS ARE DEAD BECAUSE OF ME, TOO! IF I HAD NEVER BEEN WHO I AM, THEY WOULD BE ALIVE! SO WOULD SIRIUS, DUMBLEDORE, AND CEDRIC!"
Tears were now streaming down his face, but he didn't seem to notice. Everyone was staring at him with shock, except Ginny. She was wearing an expression torn between pity and sorrow as she watched the tortured boy before her.
"I SHOULD'VE LISTENED TO THE DURSLEY'S WHEN THEY TOLD ME I WAS A FREAK! THEY'RE RIGHT! ALL I'VE EVER CAUSED IS DEATH AND SORROW! And that's all I'll ever cause…."
His chest was heaving when he finished, his emerald eyes blazing behind silver-rimmed glasses. Before anyone could say a word, he turned on his heel, running for the back door.
Mrs. Weasley made to hurry after him, but Ginny put a hand on her shoulder. She shook her head, then wordlessly stood and ran after him.
Hermione was staring in shock at the space Harry had just occupied. She knew Ginny was probably the best person to help Harry deal with this, and that's why she hadn't run after him herself. Instead she turned to Ron, whispering quickly, "Did he ever tell you about his … accusations?"
"I had no idea," he muttered, face unnaturally pale. "I noticed he used a bitter tone when he talked about Sirius, but I always thought it was directed towards Bellatrix…"
Ron shook his head, concerned for his best friend. He stood, clearing the table, oblivious to his mother's vain attempts at steering the conversation to a more cheerful topic. He glanced out the window, hoping to see how Harry was doing, but the raindrops running down the glass obscured his vision.
Harry ran outside, furious at himself for breaking down before so many people. He knew it couldn't be helped; he'd been trying to suppress pent up emotions for a long while; but that didn't stop him from silently cursing himself. He finally stopped, standing in the middle of the field that served as the Weasley's Quidditch pitch. As soon as he stopped running he became aware of the raindrops streaming down his face, making it impossible to distinguish from tears and rain. He felt clean, as the rain helped to ease the knot that had built in his chest. Harry smiled, lifting his face to the heavens.
A voice cut through his mire of thoughts. Frowning, he turned towards the source, and kept turning when he saw who it was. Ginny was streaking towards him, her auburn hair soaked from the rain.
Harry started to walk away. He knew that if he were to choose the person to follow him, it would have been Ginny; there was something about her that made him feel safe. But he couldn't be tempted by that safety again. Everyone he truly cared for, save Ron and Hermione, has been murdered, standing between him and his destiny. He didn't want that to be Ginny.
"Hey, Harry! Wait up!"
He began to walk faster, but it was no use. Ginny had already caught up to him, her hand holding him back by his shoulder. Sighing in defeat, he turned towards her.
"What?"
"What happened back there?" she asked. When Ginny saw he wasn't moving anywhere, she let her hand fall.
"What happened? What did it look like? I lost it." He made to turn from her again, but she stepped in front of him, blocking his path.
"So, you really believe what you said? That it's your fault they died?" Her voice dropped to a whisper, laced with sorrow.
"There's nothing to believe! It's the truth! You can't deny it! Who asked Cedric to take the cup with him? ME! Who fell for Voldemort's little trick? ME!"
There were tears falling down his cheeks again as he continued in little more then a whisper, "They didn't deserve it."
Ginny threw herself forward, wrapping her arms securely around him in an embrace. She felt him go rigid, then relax, letting his arms wrap around her. Softly he began to sob, letting all the sorrows of the past three years go. Ginny gently stroked his back, whispering condolences.
"Harry?" she asked tentatively. "That isn't true. Any of it."
He went rigid again, but before he could protest, she said, "You did a noble thing by letting Cedric take the cup with you. From what you told me, he was prepared to let you win, and take all the glory. But you didn't, you insisted you share it. That really shows true character. And you risked your own life, in the face of evil itself, just to bring him back to his parents. You did the right thing. Voldemort is the only one to blame."
She felt him sag into her, so she continued; "You thought someone was in danger, in mortal danger. Someone you loved. No matter what Hermione said to warn you, would it matter? You would have felt horrible if you had stayed behind. No, Harry, you did the right thing again.
"And was there anything you could have done to prevent what happened to Dumbledore? From what I understand, you where frozen beneath an invisibility cloak. But even so, you saved several lives again. If you hadn't given us your luck potion, none of us would have survived. You've saved so many people's lives, Harry. Including mine. I won't ever forget it."
She smiled, pulling back to look him in the face. His eyes seemed brighter then she had seen them all summer. As he looked her in the face, he smiled softly, before whispering, "I'm sorry Ginny. It was just too much…."
"It's alright." Gently she placed her hands on his shoulders, pulling him towards her. Softly she muttered, "I'll always be there for you."
As soon as her lips touched Harry's, she felt safe. It didn't matter that the rain had soaked through her clothes, or she was freezing cold. A strange warmth seemed to fill her, and all she knew was that this felt… right.
Harry gently pulled away, gazing at her with bright emerald eyes. There wasn't a trace of sorrow or pain in their depths, only an inexpressible joy that warmed his features. Hugging her close, he whispered, "I believe you."
She smiled, and muttered playfully, "Can I come with you on your quest, then?"
Harry grinned, hugging her tightly. "Of course you can. I wouldn't have it any other way. Only, are you sure? I really don't want…."
She shook her head, placing a gentle finger on his lips to halt his soon-to-be-speech. "I'm coming with you. No matter what happens, I'll be there by your side. I'm in more danger here then I am with you. I know you'll keep me safe."
Harry tightened his hold on her. No matter what happened, he knew now he had someone to lean on, someone to turn to in times of need. And he would never let her go.
Author's Note:
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any related characters/settings.
So, like? Hate? I tried to make it really sweet. For now this is just a one shot, but I might continue on with what happens after, on the quest for the Horcruxes. If I do, I can tie in the two stories I have written in some way. And, for some reason, this story reminds me of the song "Saving Me" by Nickelback. :PPlease review and tell me what you think I should do! And thanks for reading!