Disclaimer: I don't own "Corpse Bride" but I do own the soundtrack… does that count?

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It was the day before Victor Van Dort's wedding and he was enjoying his last day as a single man by… DRAWING! Yeah… he's not very social… anyway… He was drawing a butterfly, but it wouldn't keep still.

"Keep still, gosh darn it!" Victor said in a tone of extreme rage. Just as he got the butterfly to stay still and put his pen to the paper, a horrible sound came from outside… IT WAS HIS MOM AND DAD SINGING… HORRIBLY AND OFF TONE!

"VICTOR JOHN VAN DORT!" his mother shouted from outside. "Get your patootie out here! We're going to be late if you don't get your butt in this carriage in 5…4…3…2…"

Victor rolled his eyes and jumped out the window when his mother got to one.

"NEVER DO THAT AGAIN, YOUNG MAN!" Mrs. Van Dort bellowed to her son. She then stepped into the carriage but her butt got caught in the door in the process.

"Gosh dang it, woman!" Mr. Van Dort exclaimed. "How much Ben and Jerry's ice cream cake did you eat today?"

"That's none of your business!" she replied.

Meanwhile at the Everglot mansion, Maudeline and Finis were on-looking through their telescope thing-a-ma-bobber.

"What the heck are they doing?" Maudeline asked her husband.

"I have no flippin' idea, but it's sort of scary." Finis replied. "I just hope they're not as dirt poor as we are." He then opened a safe that was filled with dust, cobwebs, and a jelly bean in the corner. One of the maids then dusted the safe and ate the jelly bean and put a painting over the safe.

Back at the Van Dorts' place, after an hour of pushing Nell Van Dort's butt into the carriage, they were on their way to the Everglot mansion.

"Tell me again why I'm getting married to this girl I don't even know." Victor asked.

"BECAUSE WE SAID SO!" Mrs. Van Dort screamed.

"You really hooked a winner this time, Victor." Mr. Van Dort said to Victor.

"You're really lucky that you get to marry a rich broad! I got married to a random guy that sold fish!" Mrs. Van Dort cried.

Okay, back at the Everglot mansion, Victoria Everglot, Victor's future bride, was getting her corset laced extremely tight by a little old lady, Hildegard that was old and bent so much that she looked like a question mark.

"Oh, Hildegard." Victoria lamented. "What if Victor and I don't dig each other?"

Just then Maudeline and Finis were standing in the doorway.

"'Dig each other'?" Maudeline questioned pessimistically. "Are you on crack or something?"

"No…" Victoria replied. "Don't you and dad like each other a little bit?"

"Yup," Finis said. "She's definitely on crack."

"Oh, shut up!" Victoria mumbled.

"I HEARD THAT!" Maudeline shouted. "You're getting that corset laced two times tighter today!" She then randomly pulled a whip out of her pocket and whipped Hildegard.

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So... How you like... Review and I'll give you some of my Ben and Jerry's Fudge Brownie Ice Cream Cake! (and update sooner) Toodles!