There are so many other things that I should really be finishing up for posting right now, but I honestly can't bring myself to do them right now. Life is really quite unbearably shitty at the moment and I desperately need something to distract me and make me feel better. So, while this is not something that was on the agenda or even remotely planned I am writing it for myself.
Disclaimer: characters belong to their respective owners.
Warning: None really, at least for this chapter. Rating will go up later.
Song written to: All I Ever Wanted by Basshunter. Some lyrics used in story.
Betaed by Kibaftw and Chaserofpeenor.
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"Oh all I ever wanted was to see you smiling"
A Nobody doesn't have emotions, they don't have a heart after all. So why did Axel want? Why did he want so badly that it rocked him to his core? Why was it that every time he saw the little blond that he wanted to feel so desperately it hurt? Wasn't that in itself an emotion? He didn't dare voice this 'feeling' to any of the other Organization members, didn't dare allow anyone to know that he was so precariously close to feeling something. The redhead didn't even want to know what would happen if he did. Axel wasn't even sure what he really wanted from the blond, only that no one else could give it to him. All the blond ever did was stare off into space and do as he was told. It was like he was a zombie; and that just didn't sit right with Axel.
Axel was pleasantly surprised when he got to take the blond out on a mission. Sure, Roxas didn't really react to anything the redhead said, but he was present. For the time being, that was enough. It wasn't until after the mission that Axel got closer to what he wanted, or at least finding out what he wanted. It was time to return to the castle, but the redhead couldn't do that, not yet. Axel flat out refused to give up his time with Roxas, even though if asked he'd never be able to say why exactly. He brought the younger Nobody to the first place that came to mind, Twilight Town, and sat the blond on top of the clock tower.
"Don't go anywhere on me," Axel said with a grin, receiving only a blank look in return. (1)
Axel offered up another smirking smile before heading down to the ground. It was kind of creepy how those perfect sapphire eyes never held even the hint of emotion or thought, how they were completely blank and distant. Not that a Nobody would have emotion in their eyes, but still. Axel sighed heavily and shook his head; all this thinking wasn't doing him any favors. Quickly he made his way to the ice cream shop and got two sea salt ice creams before using a portal to take him back to Roxas. The blond didn't even seem to have moved an inch from where he had been left, only turning his head so that he was gazing out over the town below him. What really caught Axel's attention was the look on the blond's face. It wasn't much really, but his plump lips were turned up slightly as sapphire eyes sparkled. No one could call it a smile, but that slight quirk of the lips caused Axel's nonexistent heart to flutter.
Clearing his throat, Axel got Roxas' attention, the blond's head inclining ever so slightly so that blue eyes could look at him; for the first time Axel was certain he saw a spark of life within them. "I got you some icecream," the redhead said with a cheesy grin, holding out the treat.
"Ice cream?" Roxas asked softly, his brow crinkling as he looked at the blue substance on a stick.
"Yeah, you eat it," Axel's tone clearly stated that it should be obvious, "Lick it. Like this, got it memorized?" The redhead demonstrated with his own treat as he thrust the other into Roxas' hands.
The blond regarded the other Nobody blankly before his tongue flicked out to mimic Axel's. Sapphire eyes went wide as Roxas stared down at the icecream in his hand. Suddenly plump pink lips spread in a wide grin and the blond began to eat with enthusiasm. Axel watched completely speechless, the sight of that smile on the usually stoic blond's face causing him to completely forget about everything around him. That was what he had wanted, that smile was everything he wanted. Axel didn't know why he hadn't known sooner, but it was so obvious now. He wanted to be the one to cause the blond to show the emotions he shouldn't be able to have.
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1. Chaserofpeenor pointed out to me that this particular line was confusing to her. It's a phrase that I grew up with that basically means don't leave while I'm gone and apparently is regional. Just wanted to clear that up for people who didn't know it.
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God I'm out of practice with writing Akuroku. Half way through writing this I decided to break it up into chapters where each one is based off a line in the song. Don't know how many chapters there will be since I'm not repeating lines, but I do have a point to writing it and a place where I'm going with it. Probably only like four or five chapters in truth, maybe six or seven. Anyway, please review and let me know what you think.