Title: Close Your Eyes
Rating: NC-17 (Some pretty raunchy sex scene in here. Feel free to skip if you don't like.)
Summary: "I'm letting you go now Lexie. This is the part where you're supposed to walk away." What if she did walk away? What happens when she comes back?
Background: Lexie leaves Mark and Sofia, only to come back when he needs her the most.
Inspiration: I'm tired of Lexie being the victim in my other two stories. So since I'm currently in a rut on those, I got inspired to write one where she comes to take care of Mark.
Author's Note: I need to get over my writer's block in order to move my other two stories along, so I wrote this to get my creative juices flowing. Enjoy.
"Dr. Grey! You have a phone call, it's your sister. She says it's an emergency."
"Damn it…" Lexie mumbles to herself as she turns back around to the nurse's station she just walked past and grabs the receiver from the intern. Giving him a smile of thanks, she turns her attention back to the phone. "Hey Mer – what's up?"
"Lexie! Oh, thank god. Listen, you need to come back to Seattle now."
Laughing a little at how winded her sister sounded, "Why's that Mer?" she asks curiously.
"It's Mark. And Sofia. They need you."
Suddenly, as if all the oxygen had left the room – Lexie heard her heart beating louder than ever before. Her stomach dropped, as she tried to imagine what happened to Mark and his daughter for her sister to be calling her for help. Even though her and Mark had become somewhat cordial over the last five years, she'd seen him whenever she visited for family get-togethers in Seattle, at Meredith and Derek's house – it wasn't anywhere near the point where they were considered friends. But at the end of the day, it was an unspoken fact that they still cared deeply for each other.
That's the thing about letting old lovers go. You don't stop loving some of them. There are a few you love no less than you ever did. You're not going to try and make it work again, but if they needed you, you'd drop everything in a second for them.
"What happened?"
"Sofia's sick. Tumor. It's in her spinal cord, and its bad Lex. Oh god, it's so bad she's only five years old and she has a fucking tumor. And Mark's a freaking zombie, Callie and Arizona are a mess right now and Derek – oh fuck, he hasn't left the hospital all day trying to figure out what we're going to do, he can't operate on her he doesn't have any experience with pediatric patients and there's no way the Chief is going to let Callie, Mark or Arizona near an operating room with Sofia in it. Even if Arizona wasn't on bed-rest for her freaking high risk pregnancy right now, there's just- please, Lex… we need you."
Trying to calm her hysterical sister down on the phone, Lexie shushed her and consoled her as much as she could until she heard Meredith start to breath normally again on the phone.
"You had me at Mark and Sofia, Meredith. Okay? I'll be on the first Redeye this afternoon I should be there by tonight. E-mail everything you have on her, I'll get myself acquainted with all her scans and history on the plane that way we'll be ready to go when we get there," Lexie said, looking up as she made eye contact with her mentor, Jake, motioning for him to come over to where she was.
"We?"
"I'm not taking any chances Meredith. I'm taking the best people with me, we'll see you tonight."
Looking up as she sees Jake raise his eyebrows at her in curiosity, she gives him a sheepish look of nervousness before speaking.
"So.- How would you like to go to a consult in Seattle as a huge favor to me?"
Smiling a little at how uncomfortable Lexie looked shifting around in front of him, Jake nods his head towards the physician's lounge motioning for them to start walking, "Why don't you catch me up while I call my wife and tell her about your kidnapping plans?"
Laughing in relief, Lexie begins catching him up on the case – and her past, as they make their way past the curious interns.
[7 hours later]
"Hmmm."
"What?" Lexie asks as she looks to her side, watching Jake give Seattle Grace-Mercy West Hospital a look-over. "What was that noise for?"
Chuckling at how quickly she became defensive, Jake just raises one eyebrow at her before looking back at the building in front of them that they had been standing in front of for the past ten minutes. "Just wondering what was so terrifying about this place that you had to leave and finish your residency in Boston with me."
Smacking his arm, "Shut up jackass," she mumbles watching as he picks up his carry-on bag and slugs it over his shoulder.
"Let's go Grey, we're on a time crunch here." Pushing her towards the building, both of them oblivious to the pair of eyes that had watched them enter the hospital, curious as to who Dr. Grey had brought back to the hospital with her and what they were doing here.
"Lexie!"
Turning around barely in time to drop her bag, she feels Meredith hug her before she can even register what was happening, she pats her on the back trying to be comforting. Truth be told, she still wasn't used to this emotional Meredith, who hugged and cried, and baked and shared her feelings. Ever since she and Derek had their two boys, it was as if Meredith did a complete 180 and found her inner Izzie through motherhood.
"Hey Mer," Lexie responds as she feels Meredith start to pull back. Not getting an immediate response from her sister she notices Meredith staring behind her, uncomfortably.
"Dr. Grey."
She flinches at the cold tone his voice had taken when speaking to her. As she turns around, she notices an aura of anger surrounding him, as he crosses his arms defensively in front of him – watching her curiously.
"Mark."
"What the hell are you doing here?" He asks, coldly. Not bothering to hide the fact that she wasn't welcome as far as he was concerned.
Slightly confused and hurt by the way he was acting, she noticed the same look of confusion on Jake's face before looking back at Meredith and seeing a guilty look she couldn't hide no matter how hard she was trying.
"Oh my god, are you fucking kidding me Meredith? You didn't tell him you called me? What the hell?" Turning her anger on her sister, Lexie watched as Meredith shrugged in what looked like an unapologetic way.
"He was too proud to call you. I was not. We voted. He lost."
Flinching slightly at the fact that Mark was the only one who didn't want her there, Lexie felt some of her anger melt as she felt some of his frustration. She'd learnt the hard way through working her way up in Peds, the worst possible way to deal with a patient's family was to make them feel like they weren't a part of the decision making process.
"You voted? That's ridiculous Meredith. He's her father. This decision isn't up for the peanut gallery. And I'm not going to treat a patient against a parent's wishes. You should have known better than that."
Out of the corner of her eye she notices Mark let down his arms, a sure sign of his defenses coming down. She felt some of his frustrations as soon as she laid her eyes on him. It was a strange feeling to still feel so connected to him after all these years. She didn't know if he was as in tune with it as she was, but it felt as if they shared a secret inner bond that no one else seemed to be aware of. Right now, all her flags were telling her to give him some time, he'd come to her and Jake when he was ready. In the meantime, she'd let him think he held all the cards.
"Let's go Jake."
She looks up at her boss, who nods quietly in agreement with her as they walk past Mark towards Derek's office upstairs leaving Mark and Meredith to have a glaring contest out in the hallway.
They needed a good game plan in place for when Mark came around to the idea of surgery on his baby girl.
They'd been sitting in silence outside of Derek's office, waiting for him to finish up whatever he was doing when Jake finally decided to break the awkwardness.
"So. That was Mark, huh?"
Chuckling at his lack of subtlety, Lexie just shook her head as a smile started to grace her face. "Yes. That was Mark," just the mere fact that someone had said his name caused an involuntary grin to make its way onto her face. Despite the less than happy circumstances that brought her to the same side of the country he was in, her heart hadn't stopped having palpitations since their plane had landed in Washington.
"That was a whole lot of sexual tension between you two."
Bursting out in laughter, Lexie looks over at Jake and notices the devious twinkle his green eyes held.
"Well, that was something that we never were short on, was great sexual tension – and with good reason," she responded, pulling out Sofia's chart trying to find something else to focus her attention on. Preferably the real reason she was even in this hospital right now before her mind wandered to things that were not appropriate for her to be thinking of. Like her and Mark and exactly just how much sexual tension still lingered between them after all this time.
"Hey Lexie…"
Looking up at the sound of her brother-in-law's voice, Lexie stands up and quickly envelopes Derek in a tight hug.
"Hey buddy, how are you holding up?"
Noting his disheveled appearance, Lexie gives him a small smile in support as he scratches his head before giving her a shrug. "I'll be okay once we know what we're doing with my niece."
Nodding in understanding, Lexie turns around and introduces him to her mentor and co-worker. "Jake this is my brother-in-law Derek, Derek this is Jake – we work together in Boston."
Shaking his hand in unspoken thanks between surgeons, Derek looks back at Lexie – trying to maintain his cool demeanor as he grabs her hand. "Thank you for doing this Lexie."
Opening her mouth to tell him no thanks were necessary, Derek just shakes his head at her quieting her pleas as his eyes water and he squeezes her hand in acknowledgement. "I know he probably won't make it easy on you, but if anyone can handle that dumbass brother of mine it's you."
Letting out a laugh through the mournful, and tension filled air Lexie pushes back the tears that were close to the surface of her eyes. Without any other words, they walk into Derek's office – ready to do whatever it took to save the life of a little girl who meant the world to some people that meant the world to her.
"Daddy?"
Looking up at Sofia, Mark stands up from the couch where he was at and sits next to her bed. "Yeah sweetheart?"
"Am I going to die?"
Feeling sucker punched in the gut would probably have felt better than he did at that moment in time. Mark looks at his daughter curiously, attempting to smile and comfort her. Truth was, he didn't know what was going to happen to her. No amount of medical training and experience had ever prepared him for something like this to happen. He felt just as helpless as any other parent in this pediatric ward, and it made him angry. "No, of course not," he answers, his tone sounding more certain than his heart."Why would you ask that Sof?"
"Well, everyone keeps crying when they see me. And, I heard mommy talking to Aunt Meredith when they thought I was asleep and they said I don't look good. Do I not look good, daddy?"
Grabbing her hand in order to comfort her, Mark just shakes his head in disagreement. "You look beautiful baby girl. You always look beautiful. When people are sick, they just don't look like their normal self, I think that's what your mommy and Aunt Meredith were trying to say."
"Oh. So I'm not going to die then?" She looked up at him in confusion, her small- childlike innocence warming his heart.
"No baby. You've got the world's best doctors taking care of you. You're not going anywhere." Mark responds with a certainty that makes Sofia smile.
"Like you and mommy?" She asks excitedly.
"Even better than me and mommy." Mark whispers to her, watching as her eyes widen in amazement.
"Like Uncle Derek and Aunt Meredith and Mimi?"
Chuckling at her growing happiness, Mark shakes his head again – "You think your Uncle Derek is a better doctor than your dear, old dad Sof? I'm hurt!"
Giggling at her dad's theatrics, Sofia just shakes her head in amusement. "You're silly daddy. Uncle Derek opens up people's heads and their brains! He said all you do is make people pretty."
Grumbling in annoyance under his breath, Mark just shakes it off – making a mental note to smack his brother on the head later on when he sees him.
"Who is going to take care of me then daddy?" Sofia asks curiously as she sits up excitedly.
Clearing his throat, Mark is about to answer her when he hears a familiar voice answer for him from the doorway.
"I am."
Looking up at the doorway, he sees Sofia's eyes brighten as she realizes who is standing there. "Aunt Lexie!"
"I heard the world's prettiest little girl was in the hospital and needed someone to take good care of her," Lexie said as she walked in watching as Sofia giggled and reached for a hug from her. Ignoring the continuous heated gaze she felt on her back from Mark, she pulled back and smiled comfortingly at the little girl. Sofia might have her mother's skin and dark, sleek hair – but everything else about her, from her infectious grin to her bright blue eyes, was all Mark. There was no mistaking the bond and adoration between the father-daughter duo.
"Are you going to be my doctor Aunt Lexie?" Sofia asks, with a hint of hopefulness in her voice that doesn't go unnoticed by either one of the doctors in the room.
"Of course I am," Lexie answers watching as Sofia grins towards Mark.
"Daddy! Did you hear that? Aunt Lexie is going to be my doctor!"
"I heard baby," Mark whispers from behind Lexie, causing her to feel a warming sense of goose bumps up her spine.
"Aunt Lexie what kind of doctor are you?" Sofia asks curiously as she starts to lean back on her pillows again. Lexie can tell the little girl is starting to get tired.
"I'm a pediatric neurosurgeon," Lexie answers, seeing Sofia look at her funny. Chuckling a bit, she answers again hoping to clear up her confusion, "Pediatric means I deal with kids, neurosurgeon means I do surgery on brains and spines."
As if a light bulb flickered in her head, Sofia gives her a look of excitement. "So you're like Uncle Derek and Mimi put together?"
Laughing at the image of Derek and Arizona, the correlation the little girl had made so quickly Lexie just nodded in agreement.
"Yes. Exactly like Uncle Derek and Mimi."
Sighing as her eyes flutter closed, a smile began to grow on her small face, "Cool." She whispers as she starts to fall asleep holding Lexie's hand.
"Yeah. Cool." Lexie whispers back as she lets go of her hand and covers her up, standing to try and leave the room. She barely has a moment to catch her breath before she feels Mark grab her hand and pull her down the hall into an on-call room.
"What are you doing here Lexie?"
Mark asks, slamming the door behind them causing her to flinch at the loud noise.
"I'm here to help Sofia, what do you think I'm doing?" Lexie answers back, her chin up – a defiant tone to her voice that causes him to narrow his eyes at her. The crackling tension in the room could set the hospital in flames at its intensity between the two old lovers.
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why do you care what happens to my daughter?" Marks asks her, his tone hinting at a mild disbelief that she would have dropped everything in her life on the other side of the country to come back to Seattle for Sofia after everything that happened between them.
The look in his eyes causes her to take another step back, as she hits the wall of the increasingly small room. "I'm a doctor, Mark and - .."
Putting his arms on both sides of her head against the wall, Lexie realized she was boxed unable to do anything but look up and keep her eyes on him. "Don't give me some bullshit reason about you being a doctor, and obligated or some other shit like that. Cut the crap Lexie. –What are you and your boyfriend doing here?"
Widening her eyes in surprise at the jealous tone his voice had taken as he said the word 'boyfriend', she suddenly realized just how thrown off by her presence he was. Judging by the shallow breaths he was taking, and how dark his eyes had gotten – neither one of them had broken eye contact the whole time they'd been speaking, increasing the tension in the room to record levels, she licked her lips subconsciously suddenly feeling a wave of heat come over her as her body took on a full scale blush.
"He's not my boyfriend..." She whispered, afraid to say it out loud but not wanting him to not know either.
Narrowing his eyes, Mark watches as she looks down at the floor nervously.
"What did you say?"
Mark whispers, watching as she looks up quickly – neither one expecting the gentle tone his voice had taken with that last question.
"I said he's – uh,.. not my boyfriend," Lexie repeats, her body taking on another full scale blush starting at her cheeks and working its way down past her neck, disappearing into her t-shirt.
"Good."
Mark watched as her eyes widened and she looked at him in surprise before he cupped her cheeks between his palms. With a groan, he lowered his mouth to hers. He couldn't have stopped himself if he wanted to. Nothing in the world could have kept their mouths apart at this moment.
Her body, sweet and warm, melted against him reminding him that nothing in the world had ever felt as right as the two of them together. She shuddered as she kissed him back with just as much force, the sensuality of their bodies in sync with each other after so long hitting him with a combination of lust and love. He couldn't keep his hands off of her and they slid under her shirt, leaving a trail of tingling sensations on her back before they reached her bottom. Squeezing it appreciatively, he lifted her as if she weighed nothing, feeling her wrap her legs around his midsection making him groan in a mixture of pain and pleasure at how right this shouldn't feel. Like her legs were made to be around him.
Breaking the kiss in need of oxygen, he pulls back only to feel her keeping her lips attached to any part of him she could get near. Leaving a trail of kisses from his neck, to a nibble in his Adam's apple, and enough suction and pressure behind his ear that had his dick harder than he had ever thought would be possible.
Feeling like he was losing more and more control, Mark turns the table on her and quickly pulls her soft cotton shirt over her head. Before she had time to protest, he flicks her bra off with the hand of an expert, and his mouth finds its way down her chest causing her to moan in a way she hasn't in years.
"Mark." She whispered the first tangible words in the darkness and quietness that had taken over the room over their heavy breaths and moans.
"Mark.." She pleas for more contact as she feels his hand untie her scrub pants and his fingers make their way to her wet heat.
Gasping in pleasure, Lexie's eyes rolled back as her head hit the wall as a wave of undeniable pleasure came over her. If Mark hadn't still been holding her up, she would have fallen over by now – there's no way her legs could be functioning on her own after this.
"Are you always this wet Lex, or is it just for me?" He growls in her ear as he inserts another finger, her walls tightening as he feels her close to the edge he slows down his pumping.
Closing her eyes as she starts to see spots whether due to pleasure or a lack of oxygen in the room, Lexie wasn't sure. She'd give up breathing if it meant they could keep doing this. "Just you Mark," she whispers back, whimpering in disappointment as she feels hand leave her until she feels him carry her over to the bed behind them.
Opening her eyes, she watches as he strips in front of her – never taking his eyes off of her body she follows suit and quickly rids of her pants and boy shorts. Within seconds, he's back on top of her kissing her as if he'd lost all sense of control as soon as he laid his eyes back on her.
Not giving her any forewarning, he wedges a knee between her thighs and dove into her core. Deep. Hard. Again. And again.
His eyes, glazed over as his breathing became shallower watching her lick her lips that were already swollen from being ravaged by him.
"Tell me you're close baby," Mark gasped as his hand squeezed her butt, lifting her switching his angle causing him to hit her in her magic spot over, and over making her muscles clench him tighter.
"Oh god, oh god Mark, so close," Lexie whispers between moans before grabbing his head and kissing him. Hot, and breathless – her tongue making him lose all sense of control. He was spilling into her before he could even think about if she was with him, her mewling sounds of pleasure urging him on. His hand slipped between them again, as he thrust he gently stroked her in a circular motion – over and over until she strained upward, biting his shoulder in ecstasy.
Their shallow breaths mingled as he felt himself soften around her, he withdrew and rolled beside her as they both felt the difference in the tone of the room.
This wasn't about sex.
This was something so deeply emotional that there weren't even words to describe what had just happened between them.
Feeling her sit up beside him, Mark notices her posture no longer relaxed as she grabs her underwear and slides it on underneath the sheets. Feeling like he should say something as she stands up and puts her bra on and slides her shirt quickly over it Mark opens his mouth only to shut it again when she puts her hand up in an universal symbol of stop.
As she ties her pants back on she looks at him, a look filled with sadness and love.
"I'm doing it because I love her Mark."
Looking at her in confusion, Mark sits up for a minute until he realizes she's finally answering his question from earlier.
"Her dad was the love of my life. How could I not love something that's half his?"
Not giving him a chance to respond, Lexie leans down and leaves him with a quick peck on the lips.
[9 a.m. next day]
Watching as Derek explained to Mark, Arizona, Callie, and Meredith how the surgery would work itself out – Lexie tried to keep her mind focused on what was going on in the room, avoiding the amused glances Jake kept sending her way as he watched her and Mark interact with each other since what happened in the on-call room yesterday, she was really beginning to regret telling him everything.
"Who all is going to be in the operating room?" Arizona asked, causing Lexie to look up at this question since both she and Derek knew that they'd want to be in there with her.
"Just the team Lexie, Jake and I have put together," Derek answered waiting for what he thought would be an immediate outburst of anger from his best friends.
When all he got in response was silence, he looked at Lexie and Jake who also gave him looks of confusion. They were not expecting it to be this easy.
Rubbing her eight month pregnant stomach in a subconscious effort of keeping herself calm, Arizona looked at Derek before looking at Lexie and Jake. "I don't know about Mark and Callie, but the last thing I want to do is watch my five year old daughter be opened up and dragged through a necessary but extensive fourteen hour surgical process. I trust Dr. Grey. And I trust you Derek. I can't take care of her right now, so I'm leaving her with the best people who can."
Mark, running his hands through his hair nervously, looked back at Derek before letting out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding in. Leave it to Arizona to say things in the best possible way even in the worst situations.
"Me too."
Looking at Mark in surprise, Lexie felt her heart expand not aware of the gazes the rest of their friends were giving the two of them. And just like that, it was as if the dynamic had shifted. Looking up at Derek glancing curiously between them, Lexie bid everyone a see you later as she grabbed her pager quickly making her escape from the room under the assumption she would be prepping for Sofia's surgery.
In five hours, it would all come down to whether or not her and Jake could accomplish this. Whatever had happened between her and Mark, would just have to wait. Just like it did for the past six years.
"Alright Sofia, remember what we talked about?" Lexie asked the little girl as she motioned for the anesthesiologist to hold on for a few minutes while she finished talking to her patient.
"Yes Aunt Lexie. I'll count to twenty, and go to sleep for a while and when I wake up you and Jake and Uncle Derek will have me all fixed up."
Derek smiled at the interaction between the two girls, looking up and seeing the same look of adoration on Mark's face as he watched Lexie take care of his baby girl.
"Something like that," Lexie responded back with a small chuckle.
Motioning for the anesthesiologist to go ahead, Lexie stepped back as he put the mask over Sofia's little face and she started her countdown. "1… 2…3…..4…5…..6….8…"
Looking at her surgical team as they all take their designated spots in the room, Lexie takes a deep breath nodding at Jake motioning that she was ready to go.
"Alright. It's a beautiful day to save lives people," Lexie said brightly as she held her hand out for her surgical tools from the tech beside her. Derek smiled brighter as he listened to her quote him and start running her operating room.
And just like that, Mark watched as Lexie transformed in front of his eyes, into one of the most graceful surgeons he ever had the privilege of watching. Her and Jake worked together with little words, most of their movements seemed to be in tune with one another – as if they were the same person, with four arms instead of two different people. As soon as the surgery got to a point where the surgeons needed complete and total focus, they were all escorted away from the viewing room into a private waiting room where Derek was in charge of updating them periodically on what was going on.
Looking up at the clock, everyone noticed it had been enough time for the surgery to be over but no one wanted to speak up and say anything for fear of what it meant. Suddenly, it was as if all the faith they had put into surgery was being second guessed by all of them. They tried not to give themselves a chance to think about what would have happened if she didn't make it through the surgery. It wasn't as if they had an option. Without the surgery, there's no way she would have made it anyway. The surgery gave her a sixty percent chance of recovery. If she survived. If she made it, she would still have a long way to go, but she would be over halfway there.
Everyone stood up as they watched Lexie and Jake walk out of the operating room, talking amongst themselves as the took off their surgical caps. Jake looked up and noticed them all watching and said something that caught her attention towards them. Lexie kept walking towards them but Jake stayed back and headed into the recovery ward.
She smiled kindly at them before starting her update, reminding herself to maintain a certain amount of distance between their situations as their doctor. "The tumor was a little more complex than we originally anticipated; we had to remove part of her hip where it had spread but we were able to repair everything ."
"What are you saying Lex?" Meredith asked, looking past the doctor bullshit Lexie had been trying to feed them.
Sighing in relief Lexie smiled at everyone, "One centimeter over and we would have had to snip her spinal cord and she would have been paralyzed for life. Instead, she can probably walk out of here in a few months. I'd say that's a minor miracle. With good chemotherapy and radiation treatments, there's no reason she shouldn't make a full recovery."
Watching as everyone started a mix of laughter and tears in relief, she felt herself being pulled into hugs by everyone except Mark who was giving her a look of awe as tears ran down his face.
"She should be on her way to recovery, she needs her rest I doubt she'll be awake anytime soon but I'm sure she'd appreciate the company all the same when she wakes up," Lexie said to Callie and Arizona who were holding each other and kissing in the midst of their tears and laughter.
"Thank you."
She looks back at Mark as she hears his statement; nodding in acceptance she heads back to recovery ward to leave them with a game plan for when she's gone.
"Where do you think you're going?" Lexie asks Jake as she watches him walk up to her in the nurse's station outside Sofia's room, dressed back in his everyday wear dragging his luggage along with him.
"Home," Jake responds smirking as he sees a panicked look in her face. "You know, to my wife. Who is eight months pregnant and will kill me if I miss the birth of your third godchild."
Smiling a bit at the thought of Jenna going into labor without Jake around, Lexie just laughs and nods her head in understanding.
"Are you staying?"
Looking up at him suddenly, blushing as she shook her head in denial causing him to start chuckling at her.
"Come on, Lex. How long are you going to keep running away from him for?"
Feeling tears start to well themselves up as her chest tightened, she looked up about to deny everything Jake was saying until she saw Mark standing behind him listening to them. Jake looked back and noticed the two of them watching each other, squeezing her arm in a sign of comfort. "Go to him. Life's too long to spend it without the people you love."
Smiling at Jake as he gave her a hug goodbye, she looked back and noticed Mark still hadn't budged from where he was standing.
"Want to grab some coffee?" Mark asked her – a sign of meeting her halfway she nodded quickly in agreement, they walked out towards the kiosk outside, not noticing the crowd of people watching them hoping they would finally find their way back to each other.
"Still two creams, one sugar?" He asks as they walk up to the vendor – her eyes brightening at the fact that he still remembered how she took her coffee after all these years.
"Yes."
They stood in silence as a million thoughts raced through her mind. God help her, she'd played this scene of her life out so many times in her head throughout the years. Wanting him to come to her. Willing herself to get over her pride and run back to him. Now here he was. In the flesh. Mark Sloan was in front of her and she had no idea where to even start.
"Well, this is awkward," he said – finally breaking the silence sending his familiar smile towards her. "Okay… how 'bout I cut to the chase?" he asked finally.
"Why don't you do that."
Taking a deep breath, he turns to face her as he pulls her down to sit beside him on the bench they'd been walking past. "Lex, there hasn't been a day since you left that I haven't fought the urge to bring you back into my life."
The horrible ache in her heart started to ease into a dull throbbing.
"I don't think that you understand, or literally comprehend how deep this between us goes for me. I'm not over exaggerating. I'm not saying it just to say it, and I'm sure as hell not lying here. There isn't another soul on this planet who makes me half the person I am when I'm with you. I guess when you think about it it's always come down to me and you. You have my whole heart. You've always had my whole heart. For better or for worse, there's no one else that can measure up to you in my life."
She could feel her heart in her throat now, hear it pounding her ears away.
"I'd like to think I never did anything to hurt you, or said anything to hurt you, but we both know the truth. I did. And that's a part of me. I make mistakes, I know who I am because of them and I lost you once because of them. I'm not about to make the same mistakes again, you're it for me Lexie."
"I love you Mark." No hesitation. No doubt.
"Say it again."
"I love you."
Tears filled his eyes as they saw regret and pain in both their eyes.
"I'm sorry," he hears her mumble in his shoulder as she pulls him even tighter around her. "I'm sorry I let you go."
"I'm sorry I was such a coward," he wrapped his arms around her, held her tight.
She held his face and kissed him with all the love, longing and pain they'd both suffered the last six years. Pulling back from him quickly she points her finger at him, her face suddenly taking a serious note "If you ever make me walk away from you again, I swear I'll make you wish you'd never been born."
Laughing loudly, he picks her up and swings her in happiness as she squeals squeezing her arms tighter around him.
"Oh god, I missed you" he mumbled as he pulled her lips to mesh with his again.
"Never again," she promised between their kisses. "Never, ever – ever."
That night they talked. They talked about life. Their times together. Maybe they weren't the same two people they once were, but some things never changed. Some things last, and even though they didn't know what was going to happen to them or where they were going they just knew they couldn't let each other out of their lives.