Disclaimer:

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I was thinking of deadly pranks Harry could play on Voldemort and his Death Eaters here is the first one, I will have to think on others though.

The Birthday Present

As the upbeat music played loudly, Harry happily taped the last Happy Birthday banner across the hallway leading to the party-room. It was still three days before the party but he did not care he was so excited.

Entering the party room at the end of the hallway Harry felt the slight rising of the floor leading into the room but he hoped that was only because he knew it was there; when his 'surprise' guests arrived, they should not notice a thing.

The mound of wrapped boxes in the corner of the room was astounding and the brand new Firebolt X was displayed proudly in front of them all, he was gonna hate to lose that. Harry was worried about the plan, he could not be sure that Draco would come to say the magic words; the trap could be for nothing if someone did not say the 'magic words' to activate it. He could not even be sure Voldemort would come either but even if he did not Harry was sure that Voldemort would send a fare amount of his Death Eaters, a lot of Death Eaters hopefully, just to kill as many order members as they could, and to attempt to capture him for Voldemorts' later pleasure. Therefore, that trap would still be worth it, in just getting rid of a few of those idiots. A blow of that magnitude would really set Voldemort back with the added bonus of pissing off the Dark Lord. Who knows maybe Voldemort had a weak heart and that is all it would take. A loss of a few of his lackeys and one heart attack later no more, Dark Lord, at least for a while.

Harry actually giggled at the thought, he did not know where that came from, but it felt good. He had not had anything to laugh at, in a long time. Dumbledore's death had hit him hard, until he had thought of this master prank, the Marauders would be proud, neither Sirius nor Remus had said they had tried anything like this. He just hoped Pansy came through for him, it was hard to set Neville up right when she was near, and leaving that slip of paper with the secret for # 10 Grimond place for her to find without any questions on her part was not easy either. He was still surprised the Goblins came through for him so quickly, buying the house and putting it under the charm. The hardest part of the whole thing was sneaking out of school for the three hours it took for them to cast the charm and make him the secret keeper of the muggle house, it was irony that it house was just two doors down from Sirrius's house.

The house layout was surprisingly like Sirrius's place only muggle, unfortunately being empty for three years, it had not been renovated so everything was outdated by at least ten years maybe far more but everything worked the old frig, gas stove and heater, everything, once it was turned on that is. Even the furniture was close to what Sirius had in his place it just was not as old or even in as good a condition.

Harry only hoped that Malfoy's mom or Bellatrix could confirm that the Black home was indeed on Grimond place just not that it was not #10, adding credence to the prank birthday party. He hated using Neville like that but it was well known that he lost things and one slip of paper from an invitation was easy for anyone to lose unfortunately he could not have told Ron or Hermione about his plans it really would not have come off nearly as well, if it worked at all.

It was true there was a birthday party planned but it was at the Burrow, Harry had even asked for it. It was needed to set up his trap at his new house and with Dobby's help it came out perfect.

Harry smiled as he picked up the small but thick two inch by three inch piece of metal, which he had been charging with his magic every day for the past five weeks. Harry was lucky he caught that passage in the library about charging Goblins items with magic; they sure charged him enough for the small piece of Goblin steel though. Harry wasn't sure if he could put enough magic at one time into an object for his plans to work but he was sure that five weeks' worth of magical charge plus Ron, Ginny and Hermione each adding a weeks' worth of charge during the last week of school was more than enough to do the job. Hermione was not happy he would not tell her why they were doing it, but he assured her that she could figure it out given time, and if she hadn't by his birthday he'd tell her, the only hint that it was a birthday present for himself. He was surprised, she had not figured it out after holding it the first time, it should have been obvious.

The charge that he had finally built up was probably over kill but a large battery of magic was what would be needed, the coordinates was quite far 149,600,000km, Harry wasn't sure if anything like this had ever been done. The other day Harry had gotten the feedback needed proving that he had enough magic built up for the distance involved but he wanted one more charge to make sure. Therefore, he focused all his magic once again and pushed it into the piece of metal. He almost stumbled as he knelt down to place the piece of metal in the grove Dobby had made just for in under the stack of presents locking it in place before he moved the thick lead sheet of metal over it hoping it would hide its magic from anyone looking for something like it, until it was too late, that is.

"Dobby!" Harry called tiredly as he stood. "Time to go home." With only three days until his birthday, the order should be coming any day now to take him away to the Burrow.

Scene Break

As the Order, members entered Privet, drive Harry was engulfed in a hug from his bushy haired best friend. He held her not letting go as he normally would. He was happily for once, with his surprise, set up he finally felt he had a future, maybe it was not with Hermione, she fancied Ron and had since third year, but he was not going to hold back anymore. To Harry's surprise Hermione still hadn't pulled away and a slight groan from Ron, told him that this hug was the longest the two friends had held, ever. The groan annoyed Harry to no end but he reluctantly pulled away from Hermione glancing at Ron as he did, Harry wanted to ask what the gits problem was, but he did not as he stepped back sadly. Hermione for her part was reluctant to pull away too and glared at the redhead she had also heard the groan and was not pleased. Harry caught the glare she directed at Ron and smiled sadly to her.

Harry turned to Fleur and to her surprise instead of the basic hug and pat on the back, he normally would have given; he gave her a long tight one. "Fleur it's nice to see you again." He said as reached for Bills' hand. "Bill congrats, you're a lucky man to be marrying Fleur!" He said truthfully, as he shook the bigger man's hand. "I should warn you though I got to know Fleur a little after the tournament and I could easily see her as a sister." Harry finished with a slight glare to Bill who gulped slightly getting the hint, Bill had similar thoughts aimed at Harry about his own sister so he knew it was in jest if only slightly.

"I could say the same for you." Harry frowned but Bill smiled. "I don't know why you two broke up, Ginny hasn't said but I hope you work it out."

Harry smiled at the thought before taking a deep breath. "When this is all over and I can finally think about a future we will see." It was Bill's turn to frown, Harry did seem to be in the center of things in this war, so maybe it was a good thing they broke up, and then it hit him, that was the exact reason they had and Bill grabbed Harry in a quick hug whispering "thanks" as he did. When Bill pulled back, Harry smiled knowing that Bill now understood why he did it and was happy Bill did not blame him for hurting his little sister. It could be saving her a much bigger hurt later.

When Moody brought out the Polyjuice potion explaining what they were going to do. Harry said. "NO!"

"Yes we are." Moody said dropping Harry's hair, that Hermione had pulled out of his head.

"No we are not," he said still glaring at Hermione while he felt the back of his head where he was now missing a bit of hair. Looking at Moody Harry let loose. "That plan is the stupidest thing I have ever heard, who the fuck thought of that?" instead of letting Moody answer, Harry turned to Remus. "Moony I'm ashamed of you, going along with something like this, what kind of Marauder are you?" Harry hissed before finally turning back to Hermione. "I will not be losing any of you," emphasizing the "you" showed exactly who he was talking about and Hermione blushed but Harry wasn't finished and didn't see nor care that Ron had tensed beside Hermione taking a step closer to her as he did. ", on this hair brained plan. There are so many holes in it someone is bound to die. Dobby!" the little house elf appeared beside him waiting for his orders. "Can you and Winky help getting everyone here to the Burrow?" as Dobby nodded as Winky popped in beside him. "Let's do this the safest way possible, shall we?" Harry smirked at their stunned expressions as he took Dobby's hand and disappeared.

Scene Break

The next day Harry laughed as he and Hermione twirled during the dance. He was having fun, truly having fun for once. It was his 17th birthday and Hermione had gotten him up to dance. She was beautiful she always had been, if only she did not see Ron as she did. At the thought of Ron, Harry looked in his direction and saw the scowl as he stuffed his face with another huge piece of cake, his fifth or was it his sixth. Harry shook his head, turned back to his bushy haired friend, and caught her frown aimed at the red headed eating machine. Harry sighed and that caught Hermione's attention. "What's wrong?" she asked worriedly seeing the sadness.

Shaking his head, he answered. "It's nothing Hermione, at least nothing you need to worry about." Hermione gave him the look he knew all too well, 'tell me now!'

Harry smiled; he was not going to get away from answering. "I just missed my chance that's all, if I ever had one that is but I wasn't ready when you two were to start having those kinds of feelings and the Dursleys made it even worse then to top it off being separated from you over the summers while Ron…"

Harry's eyes had glassed over and he started to stumble, Hermione had seen it before, he was getting a vision. Hermione pulled him tight as his knees buckled. Hermione went down too, lowering him down slowly pulling his head into her lap tears streaming down her face. She knew these visions were horrible for him and the fact there was nothing she could do to help him made it all the worse. Everyone started to crowd around them trying to see if they could help. "Get away!" Hermione screamed as she held him tighter.

Scene Break

The door of number 10 Grimond place was blown to pieces as eight black robed wizards entered. Harry/Voldemort followed calmly. Beside him was a pale blond boy. "If the info you provided is false you and the girl will pay."

"Yes My Lord." Draco answered only then taking a gulp. Pansy overheard Potter and Longbottom, as they got off the train, and Pansy picked of the piece of paper Harry had given him when Longbottom lost the secret like the oaf he is. "It is Potter's birthday, he is here, I can hear them singing."

Harry/Voldemort nodded but continued silently down the hallway as the forward group of Death Eater's blew up the next door and the sickening music increased in volume. Harry/Voldemort read the Happy Birthday signs and streamers that decorated the hall as he entered the large living room were a large stack of presents taller than he was, stood in the corner. A flying broom on a stand was on display in front, but other than that the room was empty of furniture and partiers except for a small table with a Muggle wireless playing Happy Birthday, seemingly repeatedly. As the rest of his Death Eaters that had followed their Master packed in to the room Harry and twenty-five of his top Death Eaters all turned to Draco.

Draco gulped, he looked from his father, to Aunt Bella and finally back to the Dark Lord trying to come up with a way to save this. "LOOK, LOOK!" Draco exclaimed pointing excitedly to the broom on its display stand, prominently in front of the other presents. "He is here somewhere, that's a Firebolt X it's…" Harry/Voldemort felt the tug of a portkey and knew something was not right. Suddenly there was bright light for a split second and then nothing.

Scene Break

Everyone watched and waited, his friends Neville, Luna, Ron, and Ginny, even the parents Remus, Tonks, Mr., and Mrs. Weasley.

Harry's eyes blinked and he started to stir. Suddenly Harry was back and clutching at Hermione. "He's dead, I am free, I am free." He exclaimed just before unbearable pain shot through his scar and passing out as black smoke lifted from it. The smoke screamed a blood-curdling scream before disappearing.

Unknown to everyone else something similar happened in four other places at that exact same time. One in a vault at Gringotts a cup screamed as it melted to slag. A second in a strange room filled with junk a diadem shattered like a grenade. The third was a locket burst into flames as it screamed its last scream not unlike the toad woman who was wearing it at the time and finally the forth was a large snake gave its last breath in its death throes as the pain became too much for its heart.

Scene Break

Harry woke to bright light, very bright warm light. So bright, he groaned and slapped his eyes shut. It must be late morning, he thought as he took stock of his surrounding without opening his eyes, he'd learned to do that, having woken up way to many times in the hospital wing. At least he knew he was not there, so then than the next place was the Burrow, yes he decided he was there, in Ron's room by the smell of it. Harry wished the lug head would clean occasionally, at least the day before Harry was to arrive but no, that never happened. Harry had cleaned it once and had to endure Ron's complaints that he couldn't find anything, that must be the same reason Molly never cleaned it either or it could be fear of what she'd find or more likely what might attack her if she tried. Harry just knew she never suggested he help Ron clean it, so now he knew he was in Ron's room and of course Ron wasn't there, which was why he was able to sleep so long, a person could only take so much snoring. Next, he was very warm and comfortable. It must have had a ton of blankets on him, but he was still comfortable so he did not care, he could stay here for a while, maybe all day even. He could not move his shoulder or arm but moving his right hand, he found something else warm and soft, but what was it. Moving it, he found no hair so it was not his leg or even his stomach. Stomach? Moving farther, he found what felt like a belly button and Harry froze opening his eyes quickly to find two heads, one bushy brown curled up against his side, and the other bright blond on her back her head on his shoulder. Bushy brown he knew was Hermione but the only blond in the house was Fleur. Bill was going to kill him! Ron was going to kill him! Wait that blond was the wrong color for Fleur, Gabriel then. "I am so dead." Harry said aloud as his hands flew away from the girls.

"Harry, what's wrong?" Hermione pushed herself up to set on her elbow with a look of concern.

"Ron is going to kill me!"

"Why?" Hermione started to ask before she looked to the door and nodded to herself. "…oh no Harry, Ron threw a fit last night about me staying in here with you, so we had it out, yes I was looking at him, but I realized last night you may just feel about me the way I have always felt about you." Hermione had a hopeful look to her eyes and Harry smiled.

"So…"

"Let me just say you haven't missed your chance yet Harry. I have never even considered staying in the same bed as Ron, which should tell you something."

Harry smiled happily but just before he started to speak, he remembered Gabriel on his right side. Looking at her, he asked. "Yeah but I am still dead once her father finds her here."

Hermione giggled making Harry turned back to her. "Her mother knows exactly where she is."

"What! Um Ok but she doesn't know where my hand was when I woke up."

Hermione leaned over Harry to look at Gabriel and giggled again. "Where your hand was, Harry?"

Harry thought about what Hermione might have meant and realized his hand was warm again it was right back where it had been when he awoke. He tried to move it away from Gabriel but realized she was now holding it, holding it higher closer to her chest then her stomach. Having to yank his hand free he called out. "Gabriel!" he was glad his arm wouldn't could twist any farther or his hand would have…Gabriel for her part giggled stopping that thought, luckily as she sat up turned to sit on her knees facing Hermione and him with a pout. "Gabriel You cannot do that."

Gabriel looked between Hermione and him before grabbing Harry's hand and trying to slip it up her nightshirt making Hermione laugh. "I do not think she takes no for an answer."

Gabriel nodded her agreement before taking a rather drastic measure and pulling her shirt over her head stunning both Hermione and him and Harry was too stunned to stop her as she pulled his hand to her small but developing chest just as the door opened.

"How is he… What is going on here?" Molly screamed.

Harry turned horrified trying to free his hand from Gabriel's death grip even as Gabriel turned to use a long string of French that he had no idea what was being said and he doubted Molly did either.

Hearing her sister Fleur entered and taking in the situation pushed Molly out. "Maybe I should take care of this."

After Fleur shut the door, she turned to the three of them. Harry expected to find her wand pointed at him but actually could not find where she'd put it in the sheer nearly translucent nightgown. The guys, had pictures of girls in them and Harry thought it was called a teddy bear or something like that, whatever it was called it hugged her each and every curve.

Fleur opened her mouth to probably lay into one or all of them but when her eyes met Harrys' they turned for a lack of word 'hungry' and she started to stalk onto the bed like a cat stalking prey. Her sister giggled, Hermione was just plain confused while Harry gulped, as she slowly got closer until her lips met his. Now Harry was confused but not too confused not to respond to the kiss. Fleur deepened the kiss and Harry accepted her tongue into his mouth until Hermione had to stop it.

"Fleur." She said and when she did not get a response she said it again louder "Fleur!" but when she still did not get as response other than flattening herself on to Harry her knee between his legs she tried a different tactic. "Fleur Bill!" that seemed to get Harry and hers attention. Fleur broke the kiss and looked horrified down at Harry and the other two before jumped back off the bed and running from the room slamming the door closed as she left. Hermione looked to Gabriel who giggled with a shrug then at Harry who was confused but extremely happy. Having seen the very arousing kiss Hermione wanted to try it for her-self so she kissed him, Harry kissed her back and deepened it to boot. Hermione was reluctant to stop the kiss, she could not believe how good it felt, she should have done this long ago, but she pulled back panting. "Um…sorry but we have to go and um…" Hermione was lost in the moment so Gabriel took advantage and kissed him too.

Scene Break

It was not long before there was a light knock at the door forcing Hermione to let go of Harry's lips once again. Gabriel tried to take advantage of his empty lips again, as was their custom over the last ten minutes but he called out "come in" before she got the chance. Hermione giggled at Gabriels' pouting face as the door opened.

Some Gryffindor he was, Harry wanted to run once he saw whom it was, but he was trapped underneath two beautiful girls. He also did not expect Gabriels' beautiful mother to be smiling, as she entered and shut the door, either.

He figured he would be hexed about now. "I will bring up some breakfast for the three of you; I think we have a lot to talk about."

Scene Break

Harry was ecstatic, happier than he ever thought he would be. He had two girlfriends; well he was magically married to one of them, and the other was his best friend, the one who never turned her back on him, the one he had loved for forever. In fact, they were each on his arm now, as they walked through the Burrows orchard.

Fleurs wedding had gone off without a hitch; her marriage bond with Bill stopped her desire, her magic from reaching for his. Fleurs mother had explained it, his magic without that Horcrux called out to Fleur. It was nothing either of them could do about it, it was a Veela thing, luckily, her completed marriage bond with Bill changed that, and now her magic will only seek his, her heart already belonged to him and now her magic did also. Bill was very glad about that, he was ready to just wish them luck and leave her. Bill loved her so much he just wanted her to be happy.

Gabriels magic was very similar but she had given Harry her heart already. So now, they were married, at least in the eyes of magic, and it would only get better once they consummated it. Harry could not believe her parents were Ok with that, more than Ok even. The five of them were leaving in the morning to spend a week in France, consummating their relationship. Something that the three of them had wanted to do for the last two days but couldn't, Harrys magic would have driven Fleur insane or into their bed, and that would have finalized the bond between fleur and him and ended any bond the marriage ceremony could create between Bill and Fleur before they even had a chance to try. It had not been a foregone conclusion until it was all over; luckily, it worked because Harry did not think he could handle being married to three girls, especially if two of them were Veela, anyway.

Harry hoped that Hermione's parents, once they found them in Australia, take it as well as Gabbys' has, but somehow he doubted that, marriage between three people just was not done, he need not have worried. There were things Hermione had not been told about her parents, social life. One who was not taking it well was Mrs. Weasley, it had been fun watching her sending out letters to Hermiones' parents only to have the owl return an hour later with the letter, though. Hermione was not happy, Mrs. Weasley practically called her a slut, she was having a hard time coming to terms with everything, but less of a hard time then Ron, he was a right git, but thinking about it, when was he not.

At least Ginny took it better, at least after Luna took her aside during the wedding last night, Harry had to laugh when he saw them coming out of Ginny's room earlier, the blush of Ginny face was priceless. Luna's sticky kiss on cheek confirmed Harrys' first thought, his raised eyebrow brought Ginny's blush to new heights. Luna asking if he would be willing to father their children brought a blush to his. Luckily her stipulation that it wouldn't be for a few years calmed him down until she said she'd talk to his wives about practice sessions, brought it back full strength.

That revelation took the heat off Hermione and him, and Harry was proud of his ex-girlfriend for standing up to her mother, better then Bill had the previous year, for Fleur. Ginny telling her mother in no uncertain terms that she was with Luna, and there was nothing she could do about it, but being told that she would get twice the grandbabies from the union shut her mother up quickly. Until she was told that, he, Harry, had agreed to father any children either of them had. That had brought her ire back on him. He had not told either Hermione or Gabby that news yet; he figured Luna question had been half hearted, expecting the two of them to find someone else before that time came, so the looks he got from all three were funny to everyone, but Harry.

The twins were getting on his nerves though. His prank on the 'forces of evil' made him a celebrity in their eyes; they were taking to following him around like puppy dogs. Luckily, Moony was able to draw them off most times, as he was their new partner, with a little help from Harry, it was a self preservation move, but he now feared the pranks that the three of them would come up with.

Harry was brought out of his thoughts when a big busted dirty blonde-haired woman hugged Hermione asking. "Are you sure?"

Harry was confused and Hermione took pity and answered the question more fully then it was asked so too answer his question as well as Lavenders. "Yes I'm sure, I should never had set my sights on him, we were just too opposite for each other. It has been said, opposites attract, but it is a little too much for either of us. He really does like you, just tone down that 'Won won' business; you will have to keep him in line though at least if you want him to amount to anything, I'm sure you can find incentives for that." Hermione finished with a pointed look to Lavenders assets.

Lavender squealed. "Oh I've grown up some since then, Hermione." Hermione eyebrow rose at the squeal but said nothing as Lavender turned and went hunting for her soon to be boyfriend.

Harry turned to Hermione. "You set up Ron?"

"Are you Mad?" it was her turn to be worried.

Harry grinned. "No, not in the least."

Hermione smiled. "Good, because I know that Susan and Hannah are together but I think they need a man, a good one, what do you think of Neville, unless you want to see about a deal like you have with Luna and Ginny?"

"Um No, they'd be good for Neville and what deal?" Harry asked worriedly.

"Oh you're having dinner with them once or twice month, and the three of us might, once in a while." Hermione answered innocently, giving him puppy dog eyes.

Harry looked to Gabby for help but she giggled and kissed him on the lips, but was no other help.

Harry looked between his two wives and shrugged and wrapping his arms around them to continue their walk. Who was he to complain, his two wives wanted him to have sex with two other girls once a month and possibly join in sometimes. Hermione was finding she liked girls more than she ever thought possible, maybe gabby was a bad influence, what was he crazy? She is a very good influence.

Harry had to laugh and Hermione eyebrow rose in question. "Oh just thinking, how much my life changed just deciding to give myself a birthday present." He answered pulling the two girls closer in a tight hug.

Authors notes:

I know the sun might be a little too far but I thought it was funny. As for the sun, I am thinking it is so hot no magic could survive.

I'm writing another story involving a volcano but I'm not posting till I'm done, unless I'm desperate, but I still have lots of one shots to finish.

As I said, I am thinking of other prank stories, like plastic explosive and ball bearings; it would not get rid of Volde but oh well, time, time to find the Horcruxs is what will be needed.