My Resolve
By: DestinysRequiem
A/N: Hey! This is just a place for my NaLu drabbles and idea's, but if you have prompts to suggest, by all means share them! Let's see what I make of them. ^_^
Rated T
They're all the same. Always trying to seduce the people they find attractive, making people's lives harder with stupid, distorted gossip that couldn't be further from the truth, making opinions of each other with just a single look.
Not that I'm one to talk, nor am I any different, but that doesn't mean I don't know how they all work. They're all lying, cunning, conniving, naïve idiots who want to believe in a world where people never lie. They fall under another's tricks to easily and often end up with bruises on their egos because of it.
The difference between us is that I refuse to be so gullible. Everyone lies, everyone cheats, and everyone lives with one secret or another. No one will ever fool me again. Not like last time.
And though I've only known this classroom for a barely an hour, I refuse to fall for all their lies, so what's the best way to do that? It's simple really; don't talk to anyone except for the teachers. Even then, only when I have questions or I'm called upon to answer them.
Their voices echoed through my ears, but it was all jumbled together, incoherent. Good, I didn't want to listen to them lie to each other anyway; hear their chipper voices as they greeted each other, saying how nice it was to see their friends again, completely oblivious to the truth. I'd just rather sit here in my seat, staying the stranger I am, the wallflower.
Well, that was my plan, anyway.
"Hey." A voice called for attention from behind me. Knowing it was directed at me, I stayed still in place, acting as though I hadn't heard them. "Excuse me?" The voice rumbled giving me the impression they were male. I continued to ignore him, thinking he'd give up on getting my attention and leave.
He did just the opposite. He walked around the desk I was so idly sitting at and leaned over the table on his forearms, locking his onyx colored eyes with mine and giving me a small, kind smile, inches from touching my nose with his. I instinctively leaned back, increasing the distance between us. He had looked somewhat like he'd just rolled out of bed. Tufts of his pink hair were sticking out in several places and his eyes were a bit droopy with barely noticeable bags under them. He must have stayed up at who knows what hour playing stupid video games or whatever it is he does.
"Hey, I was talking to you, you know." He said with a soft chuckle, which irked me a little. Can't he see I don't want to talk to anyone? I said nothing and looked out the window I'd been sitting by. The sun was shining brightly, so why did a heavy cloud hang over my head?
"My name's Natsu, what's yours?" He asked me, tilting his head to get in my line of site again. I scowled from the corner of my eye, silently saying 'Leave me alone.' but he didn't seem to notice. Mentally huffing in frustration I turned my attention back to the window. Natsu frowned at this.
"You don't talk much, do you?" He pouted before another smile sneaked its way onto his face again. "Are you just shy? You don't need to be, you know, you can trust me." He chirped.
"…I doubt it." I said simply.
"Oh! She speaks! For a second there I thought you might have been mute." He smiled a little wider, chuckling again. I turned my attention back to the window, making him scowl a little.
"What did you mean by that?" He asked. I continued to ignore him again and he puffed his cheeks in a way that should've made me laugh. "You could at least tell me your name." He pouted. I sighed in exasperation.
"My name is Lucy." I droned out. He smiled again. Does this guy know how to do anything but smile for a single minute?
"That's a nice name." Liar. "So tell me, why are you sitting here all alone?" He asked, furrowing his brows in a slightly concerned way. Why would he be concerned about me? I continued not to answer. I could tell he was starting to get impatient with me, but I didn't care. He could blow up for all I cared, so long as he left me alone.
"Can't you tell me that much?" He whined slightly. I groaned in frustration and turned sharply on him.
"Can't you see when someone wants to be left alone?" I growled. He just smiled. He smiled because he'd gotten a reaction and answer from me in one go. Oh, I would've been fine if he hadn't decided to start talking to me, prodding me for information.
"Go away." I grunted, turning to the window once more, scowling at the offending sunlight, mocking my negative mood. To my surprise, he'd actually listened to me and left my line of sight, pushing off the table and walking away.
I felt relieved… that is until the sound of chair legs grinding against linoleum flooring came from my right and to my attention. I whipped my head around, and to my utter horror, Natsu was sitting there, a triumphant grin plastered on his face.
"Did you really think I'd give up that easily?" He chuckled, an amused light in his eye. My relief gone I groaned and dropped my head in my arms which were folded over the desk. He snickered. This was going to be a long day. Though there was a moment of welcomed silence.
After the few moments of silence between us, the only sound the chattering of other students completely oblivious to our conversation, I started to become unsettled by his suddenly quiet demeanor. I turned my head slightly to look at him. He seemed to be in deep thought, staring at me.
"What? Have I got something in my hair?" I asked jokingly. 'What am I doing, joking around? Just tell him to leave!' I scolded myself, mentally shaking my head.
"Oh look, she cracks a joke!" He chuckled, his childlike demeanor returning. I glowered at the statement.
"You can leave me alone if you're going to be like that," I said. 'Oh, that sounded like an invitation to stay, stupid!' I mentally smacked my head. He frowned.
"Sorry, I'm just trying to be friendly," he admitted. I just looked at him like he'd miraculously sprung a second head.
"…So, why do want to be alone?" He asked in genuine curiosity. I stayed silent again. "Come on, it's just a question." He whined, pressing further.
"…Because everyone lies." I admitted. He stared at me, blinking dully.
"Care to elaborate?" He asked. I sighed exasperatedly, straightening in my chair. Of course he wouldn't get it. Well, no ignoring him now.
"I don't want to be caught in someone's web of lies. All we humans ever do is lie and break each other until there's nothing left. I refuse to let that happen. Being isolated and alone is better than having your spirit broken over and over again because someone wants to screw with your head or hide something embarrassing. We lie to get what we want and what we think we need, but I refuse to be a part in this scheme we live in." I stated bluntly, talking to myself more than to him. He just stared at me. I could practically hear the gears in his head turning. "What?" I glowered for probably the millionth time that day. When he didn't answer I scoffed and put my head back on the desk, facing away from him to the window again.
The silence seemed to draw on for a while, almost to the point where I began to believe that he'd actually left me alone. But of course it was too much to ask for.
"…That sounds kind of boring." He said. I sat up and faced him again. He thought my resolve was boring?! He was leaning nonchalantly on the back of his chair, hands behind his head and a smirk plastered on his face.
"How dare you, you have no right-
"It just seems like you're running away from something." He shrugged. His eyes were closed but I was glaring daggers at him anyways.
"What do you know?" I asked bitterly. He opened an eye at me and gave me a toothy grin.
"I know people, and what you just said is true to a fault." He stated.
"Then please, enlighten me." I said, crossing my arms. He sat up with a goofy smile on his face, leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
"Yes, people lie, they cheat, and they can be unbearable and downright evil even. But that is only the bad things about us! It only makes us half of who we are too." He smiled brightly, getting a faraway look in his eye. I doubt he was even seeing me anymore. "There are so many other things that make being who we are so much fun. We laugh, we meet new people, we have adventures, and we come up with whole new worlds to explore. When people lose faith in themselves there always seems to be something they find to lift them to their feet again. No matter how hard it gets, you don't just give up, you keep going and you never stop. That's how life works. That's how it's always been." He said enthusiastically. I furrowed my brows. "I don't know what happened to you in the past, but it sounds like you're giving up, and I can't stand by and let that happen." He leaned back in his seat, giving off the impression that he didn't plan on moving any time soon. I furrowed my brows.
"That doesn't change the fact that people lie, and sooner or later it'll hurt me again unless I do something to prevent it." I said turning away from him again.
"And I understand that, but you have to admit you'd get over it and come out stronger." He chuckled. I refused to look at him. "…Let me prove it to you." I whipped around, staring at his serious expression with exasperation.
"And why would I—
"Just let me be your friend and I promise you I'll show you that people aren't so bad." He smiled, but it contrasted with the pleading look in his eye.
"And if you can't do it?" I asked. His smile relaxed a little.
"Then I'll leave you to your chosen lifestyle in peace. No more pestering." He promised. I eyed him suspiciously, turning his deal over in my head.
"And if I refuse?" I asked.
"That's your decision, but I can't say I'll leave you alone." He replied. Again, I started to take it under deep thought.
Several moments passed with his hopeful expression boring into me before I came to my decision. Though I honestly didn't think he'd succeed, I decided I'd humor him.
"Fine, you can try." I told him and his face lit up like a light bulb. I'd later realize I couldn't have been more wrong about people than I was back then.
And I am still grateful that Natsu walked into my life that day. Otherwise, I'd still be who I was, a grieving girl who hates the world. He showed me the true worth of people and now I have some good friends because of him, though I hold him as my greatest.
At some point I even told him about you, Mom, and how you tied in with the resolve I had the day he and I met. That was one of the rare times I let myself cry, and he just let me get it out, silently comforting me. He's my best friend in every meaning of the term.
So, Mom, I hope all is well where you are. I'm sorry I put you at fault. I know you meant well when you said you'd always be there for me. I know you'll be watching over me, but know that I'm fine now. I love you always. Sleep in peace.
Sincerely, Lucy
A/N: Heh, hi guys! This was actualy originaly an essay for language arts, but I was thinking of Natsu and Lucy when I wrote it. I hope you enjoy! Tell me if you want to suggest something for a theme. ^_^