A fill for this prompt: 54
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It's not as crack-tastic as I intended, but I get all mushy when it's Liara and Shep. Just can't help it!
She waited patiently for the right moment, for all elements to fall into place. Over the years, she had become a skillful tactician, one who expected no less than victory. Finally, an opening had presented itself, and like a bird of prey she swooped in gracefully. Her voice crackled over the intercom, heads bobbed upwards listening as though she might manifest at any moment. "We will arrive at the citadel, at Romeo Standard 1742 hours. Crew will have 48 hours shore leave." Shepard could hear the faint cheers from the decks below, they hadn't had leave in months and her crewmen were growing irritable. "You've earned it." Another fifteen minutes and they would be docked.
"Oh man, I don't usually drink but after Tuchanka..." Joker let his comment trail off.
"Just make sure you're tip-top by the time we leave." Shepard's tone brooked no argument. Banter usually passed effortlessly between the pilot and commander, but she was too exhausted, leaving her conversations clipped, terse. She gave an audible, throaty sigh as she imagined sinking into her bed, falling asleep before her head even hit that delicious pillow of hers.
Joker snickered, pulling her out of her reverie. "Thinking about getting re-acquainted with a certain sexy asari, Commander?"
Shepard blinked, she should be. She really truly should be thinking of settling her hips between Liara's legs, nicking her teeth against the soft, warm inviting flesh of her neck. Coaxing familiar moans from deep within her on-again-off-again partner's belly. Oh, how she wished she had the energy to muster such desires. "Joker..." there was warning in her voice. Joker held his hands up in surrender as Shepard turned to leave the cockpit.
Her strides were true and sure as she walked towards the lift. If she could just get out of the bridge without someone needing her attention...
"Commander..."
Damnit!
Shepard turned on her heels, "Yes, EDI?"
"I have a question for you."
"Of course you do." Shepard muttered. "What is it, EDI?"
"Flirtation..."
Shepard sighed and rubbed her temples with her right hand cupping her forehead.
"I'm sorry, Commander, does the subject displease you?"
She put her hand down, feeling a pang of guilt. EDI was much like a child learning her first steps. Shepard couldn't be mean to EDI, she didn't have the heart. "Not at all, EDI, go ahead."
"Shepard, how does one tell when someone is flirting with them?"
"Did Joker ask you to watch Vaenia with him again?"
"I am being serious, Commander." It amazed Shepard how quickly EDI was growing astute to the nuances of organic communication.
Shepard looked thoughtful, "Flirtation... can be subtle. Sometimes its a smile, eye contact, gentle brush of the hands..." she paused, a single eyebrow arching "Though with Joker I imagine it's a brick in the face."
"Hmmm... There aren't any bricks on the ship, Commander, should I acquire some to test this theory?"
Shepard waved her hand dismissively, "I wasn't being literal, EDI. I meant that Joker is not subtle at all."
"I see." EDI's expression turned appraising, "I suppose he is not. Thank you, Shepard."
Shepard touched EDI's arm. "You're welcome."
Blessed freedom! Just a few more steps to the lift!
"Commander..."
OHSONOFABITCH! Her tone was remarkably even, "Yes, Traynor?"
"I've tracked down a batarian signal, decoded blahblahblahblah" Shepard struggled to keep her eyes open, watching the young woman's lips move was almost mesmerizing in her delirium. Traynor's voice had a soothing, lilting quality that made her drift far, far away from...
"Commander? Are you okay?"
Shepard's head snapped up, "What? Yes, of course! Yes, Traynor, we'll investigate the signal the moment we set a course."
"Thank you, Commander." Traynor, much to Shepard's ignorance, blushed lightly. She could have sworn Shepard had been staring at her lips longingly... perhaps...?
As the doors closed, Shepard slumped against the wall of the lift. Ohthankallthatisholyinthisun iverse. She was moments away from her bed, moments away from the sweet release of dreams. When the lift opened she was met with the sight of Vega's tense square jaw and surprisingly serious eyes. "You have got to be fucking kidding me." Shepard groused quietly. "What's up, Vega?" She tapped a code into her security key, opening the door to her cabin. "Whoa, nice quarters, Commander. Is this what I can look forward to when I'm old and feeble on the battle field?" Shepard usually took his prodding with good spirits, but at that moment, she was besieged with the memory of kicking a merc off a high rise. She chuckled audibly, even Jack had been impressed with her ruthlessness; "Shit, Shepard, I should be taking notes!" She'd dump this asshole out of the airlock if she didn't think his ox-shoulders would get stuck. "If I recall correctly, the last time we danced you walked away with a few bruises. I guess I'm not completely useless, huh?" Vega chuckled, "Guess not."
Vega walked around her cabin, her teeth ground in irritation. What the fuck did he want? "What's going on, Vega?"
"Did you ever have doubts when they made you commander?"
Jesusfuckingchristgoddamnitw hythefuckdoe
severybodywanttohaveaserious fuckingtalkwithmerightnow?!
"What's up, Vega, don't beat around the bush, what's on your mind?"
"I got a letter blahblahblah"
This is just taking for-fucking-ever, why is no one clear and concise? Brevity is a fucking virtue. Fuck, you're military! "N7? Yeah, you should join. You'd be great a great recruit. Is that all? All right, I'll see ya later, Vega!" She physically turned him around and urged him toward the door. "I'm really glad we could have this talk, Vega, I have the utmost confidence in you. Goodbye!"
She flopped onto her welcoming bed, not bothering to take off her uniform or boots. The mattress was sweet as the soft lips of a lover, she hugged her pillow tightly and closed her eyes. The low hum of her aquarium was blissfully soothing, for once the fish in her tank were still alive. Her muscles melted into the pliable bed, and mind slowly began to drift...
"Commander?" The intercom. Her teeth ground again.
"The reapers had better be outside of the airlock, Joker. What do you want?" Her tone could kill a man.
"I was just, uh, gonna invite you to Purgatory for a few drinks."
"I'm already in fucking purgatory! LET ME SLEEP!"
"Sure thing, Commander." his voice was surprisingly sympathetic considering what a jerk Shepard had been. For a moment she entertained the thought of remorse, but cast it aside as her eyes once again fluttered closed. She heard the soft woosh of her door opening, only a few people knew her passkey. "Liara?"
"Not quite. It's your dear ol' friend Garrus."
She tilted her head, opening one eye in his direction. "Don't you have something to calibrate?"
His deep voice like molasses, "I never tire of those calibration jokes." He leaned against her desk.
"I'm exhausted, Garrus." her voice was desperate. "I'm on the verge of vigilante justice; the next person who interrupts me is getting a sticky grenade to the face."
"Good thing I'm not the next person."
Shepard grumbled.
"I was going to invite you out for a little fun, but I think I'll be merciful and let you get some rest."
Her voice was sincere as he exited. "Thank you, Garrus."
"No problem."
Blessed, blessed quiet. She rolled over on to her back, her head cushioned by a delightfully comfortable down pillow - incredibly difficult to get as most ducks were nearly extinct. Her muscles once again relaxed, her breathing slowed, sweet darkness enveloped her. Her mind skirted the edges of merciful sleep when her door wooshed open again, forcing her out of the thick, jellied embrace. She didn't have a sticky grenade on her, but...
The silhouette of a person skillfully dodged the stereo she had thrown at them. She growled with dissatisfaction.
"Garrus, you better watch your back, you never know when I might toss your turian ass out of the airlock!" she was livid.
"Shepard!" Liara chastised.
Shepard covered her face with her hands. She had reached her breaking point, was ready to cry with frustration as she felt the bed shift beside her. Soft, unclothed hands gently guided her head to an ever softer, warm bosom. Overcome with grateful relief she could die, she really could die right now, that would be fine. She wound her arms around Liara's waist, willing her hands under her shirt desirous for the grounding touch of her supple, inviting skin. Shepard breathed in deep, calming breaths enjoying the presence of her lover with all of her senses, enveloped by nectarous scent, listening to the gentle purr of contentment her touch incited. When Liara spoke it was honeyed and hushed, "You should thank Garrus, he's the one who told me you were here." she ran her fingers through the commander's hair and laid a loving kiss on her temple. "Oh, I will." Shepard's voice was muffled as she trailed luscious kisses on the gorgeous asari's neck. Liara nudge Shepard's head, she stared into Shepard's eyes before kissing her. As she pulled away she murmured "Sleep. We have plenty of time, sleep now."
And the commander obeyed.