When it comes to writing well, I'm not exactly very high up there, so I decided to make a funny fanfic instead of a serious one. If I don't suck, make sure to tell me so I can end this everlasting cycle of self-pity.
If you often take jokes seriously or don't like swearing, this probably isn't the fanfic for you.
Disclaimer: I don't own a single crumb of Super Smash Brothers or any of its characters. I know many of you were wondering whether or not I owned the rights to a game published by the richest gaming company in history, so I thought I'd clear that up.
This is all in Lucina's point of view, also, Robin is male.
When I had received an invitation to the fourth annual Super Smash Bros. tournament, I nearly shit her pants. Of course, I didn't actually shit myself, that wouldn't be very ladylike, but I was excited to say the least, despite having no idea what the hell Super Smash Bros. even was prior to reading the letter. I was quite confused about basically everything in the letter, even after talking about it with Chrom and Sumia, who are my parents, and my sister Cynthia. However, I was also quite curious, and the letter mentioned that the Hero-King, the Radiant Hero, and some kid named Roy were going to be present, which was mainly why I was so excited. Now, I didn't know who the hell Roy was (and neither did anybody when Melee was released), but he was, according to my father, some hero of sorts.
Robin had also ceieved a similar letter just a few minutes before I did, so he would be going with me. Thank Naga. I would likely be alone if he wasn't invited. Chrom was also coming with to help with Robin's Final Smash, whatever the hell that was, but he was pretty salty when he realized that he wouldn't be joining us in the tournament.
"Bye, Mom," I said. She was smiling, but a single tear was falling from her eye. "Bye Cynthia." They waved goodbye as I put the letter in the envelope backwards as the letter instructed, and within the blink of an eye, we were gone.
We were teleported to a front lawn in front of an impressively sized mansion. It was like a shorter, thicker skyscraper, which would be the exact opposite of a skyscraper, but anyways, it was huge, with a giant front lawn almost like a park.
After staring in awe at the giant mansion, I looked to my left. Robin and Chrom were both on the ground, their faces green.
"Lu... Lucina," my father said. "You go ahead. I'll be... right back." He ran over to a row of bushes.
"I... think I'll go with him," Robin said, trailing behind Chrom. I watched as my father emptied his stomach and vomited in a trimmed bush.
"FUCK YOU!" some guy yelled as he ran over to the two men. "I'M GONNA HAVE TO CLEAN THAT SHIT UP!"
Acting like I didn't notice, I ran to the door. A woman with red hair and a suit greeted me at the large revolving door.
"Welcome to the Smash Mansion," she said as she handed me a clipboard. "Please write your name and circle all that apply." She handed me a pen. I wrote my name and circled "Smasher." "Thank you," she said with a fake smile, and I pushed myself through the revolving door.
The lobby area was almost empty. I walked up to the front desk where an old woman sat, staring at some device and occasionally clicking some thing attached to it.
"What's your name?" the woman asked politely.
"Lucina," I responded. She nodded and typed my name into the computer.
"You're on floor 8, Fire Emblem. Your bags are being delivered tonight. Here's a map." I nodded, took the map, and walked quickly over to the... what had Master Hand called it, an elevator?It was at the back of the room. Curious, I pressed the up arrow, and the door immediately opened, revealing a smilimg man in a suit.
"Hello," he said as he smiled. What's up with all these fake-ass smiles?
"Hi," I responded. "I'm Lucina." He nodded and smiked again, then went over to a metal plate near the door and pushed the button labled "8" with a basic white picture of a sword next to it.
Ding! The elevator door opened, and I stepped out into a lounging room. The first thing that came to mind was What in the name of Naga is all of this shit? Strange objects littered the area, along with casual men's clothes that were scattered across the floor. These boys are going to be a pain in the ass to handle. I turned around as I heard the elevator doors close, and the man in the suit waved goodbye to me.
"Marth!" A masculine voice called out from one of the rooms along the outdoor hallway. "I think the pizza's here! They just dropped it off!"
"Alright!" another voice, this one accented, responded. I heard a door open near the hallway. I can finally get a chance to meet the Hero-King! Steps ran down the hallway, and finally...
I saw the legendary Hero-King in a pair of plaid boxers. He froze when he saw me. I dropped my map and stared, both in awe at finally being able to meet Marth and in shock as I observed his, uh, outfit of choice. Then he ran back down the hall.
"THERE'S A NEW SMASHER AND SHE'S A GIRL! THAT'S NOT THE PIZZA! GET SOME CLOTHES ON!"
"OH FUCK!" The masculine voice yelled. I heard someone scrambling loudly in their room, opening and closing drawers.
"FOR THE LOVE OF NAGA!" Another voice yelled, this one more accented. "YOUR SCARED THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME, MARTH!"
The elevator door opened behind me. I turned around and saw Robin enter the room.
"Sorry about getting sick, Lucina," he said. "I heard some yelling. Is everything alright?"
I sighed. "No, Robin. It's not."
That's my first fanfic on this website. Please, leave a positive review. Or don't, I don't give a shit. Actually, make sure to leave the most hateful review posdible so I can drown myself in my own tears.
But seriosly, thanks for reading, and please make sure to tell me how much this sucked so I can improve and potentially make less shitty fanfics.
-Spud
EDIT (PLEASE READ BEFORE REVIEWING): I've gotten some complaints that the story is too short and the characters are out of character. I am completely aware of this.
First of all, the story is short because of the lack of plot. This was intentional. I did not want to have a boring ending even if it meant that the story would make more sense. Keeping someone intertained for a long period of time is challenging, considering that most people probably did not come for the plot, so expanding on it would be unnecessary.
Second of all, the characters are OOC intentionally. I have played Fire Emblem: Awakening fully, and I know how the characters act. I was more concerned about keeping the story funny than keeping the characters in character. Sorry if I disappointed some of you.
Also, there will not be a direct sequel. If I make another story, it will be different. Again, sorry.
With all that said, please make sure to point out everything I did wrong (I'm completely serious).