Ultimate Cross-Over Fic
By
LunarX.Shinobi
&
Black Foxx15
Warning: Mentions of Yaoi, 'issues' and…Weirdness..
--
Chapter 1: Wth…..?
Jacob growled angrily at the button. He was contemplating phasing even. His eyes were dark, intent on the button. He pulled on it again. Edward finally sighed and then laughed.
"I can undo the button, you don't have to rip it." He said. Jacob grabbed it and tore it off. Edward sighed. Jacob raised his eyebrow.
"Oh, I was just wondering why I had a violent, short-tempered, bad-smelling, horny mutt on top of me." Edward said. Jacob grinned and bit his ear playfully.
"You know why." He said, reaching for a zipper.
"Excuse me. Sorry" Crooks hobbled across the room slowly and he left out the other door. Literally, right after that, Bella burst in making out with Kaname. Jacob sighed.
"Necrophilia."
Bella paused, tossed her shoe at Jacob and then grabbed Kaname and ran to find another room. Orochimarou peeked his head in, "Did someone say "Pedofilia"?"
Jacob growled and kicked him out. Edward chuckled. "I told you we should use my room." Jacob pounced the vampire.
Alice hid in the corner with a camera.
--
Characters:
Jacob Black: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse
Edward Cullen: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse
Crooks: Of Mice and Men
Isabella Swan: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse
Kaname: Vampire Knight
Alice Cullen: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse
Orochimaruo: Naruto
"Necrophilia" means someone who ''loves'' the dead. (Vampires are technically "dead")
"Pedophila" is centered on children.
--
Edward:... ALICE.
Alice: ... ... -hands tape to lunar-
Dj:WOOOOT.
Dj:TO E-BAY
Lunar: I KNOW, HUH!
Edward:.. wait. WHAT.
Lunar: ebay. duh.
Jacob: what about ebay?
Alice: They're selling the tape of you two on ebay.
Jacob: OO
Edward:... Alice was in there the whole time.
Jacob:...
Lunar: XD
DJ : -pulls out laptop-
Lunar: WHATCHA DOING.
Jacob:... ebay.
Jacob: .. I hope ebay crashes
Lunar: DON'T SAY THAT.
DJ : I have backups
Lunar:that's where i get my pocky-cult outfits.
Edward: pocky cult?
DJ : ohhh Lunar-sama, the next pocky cult is in two minutes
Lunar: cooool.
Lunar: -gets out the podium, and temple background, and starts putting up the ''set''-
Edward:... Oo
Bella: Oo
Kaname:... Can I leave? I've got to make sure Zero's relationship with Yuki never goes past blood.
Lunar: ew.
Lunar: wait.
Lunar: hmmmm
Lunar: idk.
Lunar: YUKIXZERO YUKIXZERO
Kaname:... Who's the hyper active weirdo?
DJ : Lunar
Edward:...
DJ : wait
Kaname:... lunar.
Lunar: yeah.
DJ : you don't know LUNARXSHINOBI
Kaname:... wait. yaoi fangirl lunar...
Lunar: -grins- yes.
Kaname:.. I'm gone.
Lunar: no. zero's here too.
Zero:... what the... I WAS IN THE SHOWER.
Alice: -peeking-
Lunar: wooooo
DJ : -drawing KanameXZero using the shower pose-
DJ : THIS SHALL ALSO GO TO E-BAY
Lunar: WOOT. Can I have a copy.
Kaname:... no.
Zero: -being a couch-.. WHY IS THE CHICK STARING AT ME.
DJ : ohhhh
Lunar: ... idk. she just is.
Alice:... I can stare.
Lunar:
DJ : I just realized
DJ : Kaname said you can't have the pic...does that mean he wants it to remember good times?
Lunar: WOOT.
Kaname:...NO.
Zero:.. THERE WERE NO GOOD TIMES.
Lunar: oh, so kaname sucks?
Dj: Wait what kind of suck?
Zero:...THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
Lunar: XD
DJ : oh wow...
DJ : Love-hate relationship ok more like hating the love relationship
Lunar: XD
Zero: there is no love, and there is no relationship.
Lunar: denial is painful.
DJ : Denial is the first step in yaoi
Yuki: Oo... uhhh. daad? Why does our closet lead into a massive room... and why is zero not clothed?
Zero: ... -ducks behind couch-
Kaname:...
DJ : ...
Dj: POCKY CULT STARTING IN THE NEXT CHAPTER
Lunar: WOOT.
Yuki: pocky cult?
Kaname and Zero: I have a bad feeling on this….