Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of the Nanny, I just use them as I see fit.
A/N: Just a little something I had rolling around in my head. Hope you like it!
Three more days
The clock read 4:08am. CC stared at it until it read 4:12am before she got out of bed. Walking out of the bedroom into the suite's living space, she turned on the TV on the way to the bathroom. Grabbing a glass of water, she plopped herself down on the couch and started absentmindedly flipping through the channels.
Nope, nope, not interested, infomercial, infomercial, ah...what's this? CC thought to herself. Finding she had just caught the tail end of "Witness", right at the part when Harrison Ford is trying to escape Amish country with the beat up car and the crooked cops are coming after him with guns, CC decided to watch the denouement.
The movie was keeping her from thinking, and maybe, it might be enough to let her doze off again for a while. Of course, the movie finished and she was still awake. Surfing some more, she caught the tail end of some old eighties sitcom and let herself get carried by the insane situation it portrayed.
At 5:45am, she was yawning enough that she figured it would be worth trying to go to sleep. Closing the TV, she headed back to bed and settled in softly on her pillow. There. I'll just close my eyes and ... She didn't even wait a full five minutes before heading back to the couch.
This time, she left the TV off and grabbed some paper and her fountain pen. She had nothing to write in particular, so she doodled, letting images and shapes bring the paper to life, giving free reign to the thoughts that clouded her mind. Of course, those thoughts only held one person. Niles. His eyes, his face, his smile, his hands, his breath... Calm down CC. Getting up to get another glass of water, she let herself think of the conversation they had had just a few hours before.
"Only three more days," Niles had said into the phone. "and then we can talk in person." He sighed into the handset, "I hate this you know."
"Me too Niles, me too. It's just taking much longer than we had thought." CC explained again, for the fifth time that week. "CBS has a lot more demands on how things are to go then either Maxwell or I had considered."
"I understand that. I just want you here, now. It's not fair that we just found each other and now we have to be apart." Niles almost whined.
"I want that too Niles." CC paused a bit, "At least you have the routine to keep your mind off things right? I mean, it's not so bad here during the day, but the nights...the hotel is..."
"I know CC, I know. It's just not the same here without you. Maxwell is lost, things aren't functioning...I'm not functioning. It's better with you here... I'm better with you here." Niles confessed, even though he knew she didn't need to hear it that now. There was nothing she could do about the distance that separated them at the moment and it was most unfair of him to lay it on her, again. "I'm sorry, I know that's unfair...I promised myself I wouldn't say it out loud, I wouldn't say it to you, I just..."
"Niles, it's ok. I know. I do." CC could feel the tears welling up, the whole situation was just overwhelming at times, "I never thought I would agree with what you're saying. It makes no sense that it's better when I'm there. It's never been like that before. However, I see it. Even the kids are more comfortable around me. Just the other day, Bren..Bran...the boy, spoke to me nicely."
"You see. You are important to this household." Niles took another breath, "You are important to me. It's not about them, CC. For once, I'm putting myself first. I need you to know that it's all about me. I miss you. I want you. I need you."
"Shh. I get it. I want that too. Right now, we have to hang in there. I'll be there in three days. You said so yourself, it's 'only three days'"
"I lied!" Niles voice went up at least three or four decibels. "It's not 'only three days', it's well over two thousand freakin' miles. It's stupid phone conversations when I should be able to hold you in my arms. It's falling asleep in separate beds when I vowed that I had waited so long to have you that I would never let you go again; it's..." Niles stopped, feeling himself completely out of control. Focusing on sniffles he could hear from her he pulled himself together. "I'm sorry CC. You really don't need this now. I should be stronger; I shouldn't be laying any of this on you."
CC used a tissue to wipe away the tears and spoke softly, "Please don't apologize Niles. Everything you said is one hundred percent right on. It's not fair that we aren't together right now. It's not fair that there are still three more days before I get to see you. It's not fair that I'll have to wait until Maxwell and Nanny Fine are safely out of site before put my arms around you, feel you. It's not fair that we'll still have to wait until everyone has gone to bed before I can kiss you properly. It's not fair!" CC dropped the phone to her chest and let the sobs escape.
Niles could only wait, wishing he could do anything else but cradle the handset. "CC? CC?" he asked softly when he heard her breathing had returned somewhat to normal.
"I'm here Niles, I'm ok now."
"Well, that's debatable," Niles offered, "However, we have so little time as it is, I don't want to argue over semantics."
"You're right. Tell me what you made for dinner tonight? Did you try a new recipe?" CC forced all the thoughts of the current situation out of her head and did her best to enjoy the rest of the conversation. Niles did the same, and soon they were both laughing and truly enjoying the time they were spending together.
"It's late," Niles said, much against his will.
"Really late. You have to be up in the morning. I'm the one that's three hours behind. You'll be tired in the morning again."
"It's worth it. I would rather be tired than not get to talk to you and be rested." Niles smiled into the phone. "I'll miss you every minute until you get back."
"I miss you already and we've not even hung up the phone yet." CC chuckled softly.
"Let's not start that again," Niles suggested quietly.
"We just did, didn't we?" CC exhaled. "It's me...everything I say, it comes out wrong. This whole week, I just can't seem to do anything right."
"No." Niles said more firmly. "I'm not going to let you do this. There are going to be harder times to come, adjustments, growing pains. You will not shut down and take the blame for all of it. There are two of us in this CC. Sometimes I'll need you to be the strong one too you know."
"You're right," CC said, almost defeated.
"I don't want to be right, it's not about that. I want you, you have to know that."
"I do Niles. It's just so...I mean, sometimes I think I shouldn't have come back to your room that night. I should have given my letter of resignation to Maxwell and just disappeared. You wouldn't have to live this now, and all the other hurts I'm going to cause you because I just don't do relationships well."
"Stop it!" Niles' voice even surprised him. "CC, you are the one that I love. If you had left, I wouldn't be happier, I'd be broken. A pathetic shell of the man you knew then and know better now." Niles waited to make sure she was listening, "I would never trade any of this, even this part now, that is less than stellar in the way it's playing out. I wouldn't trade any of it because if I did, I might not have you in my life. Sure, we could be fighting, arguing, throwing insults. That was fun, it was a distraction. You. Being with you, knowing that the insults mean I love you; that is worth all of this. I love you, and I'll have you anyway I can, even it means ridiculous phone conversations until the wee hours, then so be it."
"Oh Niles," CC sighed, "I love you too. I didn't mean that I should have left. See, I did it again, saying the wrong thing." CC could hear Niles objecting again and she spoke over him, "Let me finish. I won't go into that again. My natural tendency is to back off, to walk away leaving the space for others. Thanks for not letting me do that."
"You were the one that came back that night you know. So maybe this whole spiel about running away is only something you use when it suits you. You are a very courageous woman CC, you have come a long way from the mousy socialite that started working for Maxwell." Niles smiled, "You've given me back every single insult, prank and practical joke over the years, never letting one slide. Since we've been together, you have not once let me down. I can see how you would want to hide, or put yourself second, and, at the same time, you have to know that you are first to me."
CC could feel her heart swell, "Niles, that's the most amazing..."
"I'm not done," Niles interrupted, "CC Babcock, I love you. All that you are, all that it means. The good parts, the not so good parts, even the parts you try to hide or think that aren't perfect enough to share with me. I love all of you, head to toe and everything in between. And I promise that as soon as you get here, I'm going to spend as much time as possible showing you that."
CC held the phone to her heart and twirled around the room elated. Bringing it up to her ear again, her voice echoed the happiness she felt, "I love you too Niles. I can't wait to see you."
"We are not going to let this get to us. It is only three more days...actually two now that we're going to sleep. You have meetings all day tomorrow and the day after. I have the reception to plan and the regular household stuff to do. We'll be fine, and you'll be here before we know it." Niles hoped he sounded convincing.
"Yes, you're right of course." CC agreed with false bravado.
"I love you CC. I have for a very long time. This ... situation... it's only temporary. We will be together shortly and we'll make it through this."
"I love you Niles. I know that it will be ok and I'll believe it when I'm safely ensconced in your arms. I can't wait for that. I can't believe we'll only have three days until I have to come back..."
"Nope, we aren't talking about that now. First, we get you here. Once that happens, we'll enjoy that at least for five minutes before we are even allowed to think about what happens after. Deal?" Niles hoped she would accept his offer.
"Deal!" CC said with far more enthusiasm than she felt. "Ok. I have to let you go. You need to get some sleep."
"You too, Sweetheart. You too."
"I love you," CC whispered into the phone.
"I love you," Niles answered back.
CC could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks as she relieved the conversation and the many others they had had since the project with the sitcom had taken off. Looking up at the clock, she saw that it now read 7:15am. No more sleep now. I'd better get a shower. As the hot water poured over her head, CC let a smile cross her lips.
Only two more days!