Disclaimer: I don't own the show or characters.
Gears
Raidou scowled at the reflection in the mirror. He was trying to shave – a ritual that wound up being more of a chore for him. The scar tissue that marred the left side of his face and neck was difficult to shave around, even with an electric. In fact, he usually ended up irritating the sensitive skin more with an electric and preferred using an actual razor. After the accident that left him scarred, he'd considered growing a beard, just so he didn't have to deal with it. That lasted about half a day, when he realized that the scar tissue had no hair follicles. No way was he going to go around with half a beard. He could just imagine the crap he would get…nicknames like "Patches" or something like that. He was better off just being gawked at for unsightly disfigurement.
As he ran his sink to fill it with water, he met his own eyes in the mirror. The scar itself wasn't so bad. Most shinobi had scars. It was the way he got this particular scar that bothered him, and every reflective surface he passed was a constant reminder of how badly he had screwed up eight years ago.
Just as he was lathering the shaving cream, he heard the knock at his door. Raidou looked at his watch and groaned. He must have been daydreaming longer than he thought. He and Genma had planned on grabbing dinner and a drink tonight. Raidou was dressed and ready to go, save for the shaving cream on his face.
"Common in, Genma!" Raidou hollered down the hall towards his front door. He went back to wiping the lather away from his scar, so as to guide his razor around it. A second later, Genma appeared at the bathroom door.
"Yo," Genma greeted him with a bob of the senbon in his mouth.
"I'm almost ready…sorry," Raidou apologized.
Genma shrugged. "No rush, take your time." He watched as Raidou swiped down the right side of his face effortlessly, and ran a quick hand over to see if he'd missed anything. In the mirror, he saw Raidou's forehead wrinkle with concentration, slowly moving the razor as close as could to the edge of the scars without nicking the skin.
The audience must have made him a little nervous – at least that's how Raidou rationalized it – when he hit a ridge of tissue he'd not seen under the foam. He cursed in frustration.
"You know, I thought that thing was slowly getting bigger and bigger," Genma commented as he snatched a tissue from a box and handed it to his bleeding friend.
Raidou scowled, grabbed the tissue and blotted the cut. "Shut up, Genma," he said in a quite, emotionless voice.
Genma knew that tone all too well and immediately wished he could take his comment back. If he could just keep his stupid mouth shut.
"Hey, sorry man. You know I didn't mean that, right?" Genma said, sitting on the toilet seat and looking up at his friend.
Raidou sighed and wiped off the rest of the shaving cream with a hand towel. He threw the towel in a hamper and looked down at Genma. "I know," he said, as a small line of blood reappeared on his cheek. "And if things hadn't happened the way they did, I'd probably find that funny."
Genma groaned inwardly. He knew the scar and the story behind it was something that always bothered Raidou. Hell, he was supposed to be the guy's best friend. He knew better than to bring up either topic, even if he wasn't privy to the details. But looking up at his friend's sad face, he decided enough was enough. He shot up, meeting Raidou's slightly shocked look in the eye. Truth be told, Genma thought Raidou was probably the stronger of the two; he had both a height and weight advantage. Genma was no rookie, of course, but the Third didn't pick just anybody to act as his bodyguard. Nevertheless, Genma had his friend backed into the corner of the bathroom and trapped him, slamming his fists on either side of Raidou's head. Raidou gaped, starring dumbly at his friend.
"Alright. I'm tired of this. I know you're tired of it. Don't you trust me?"
Raidou was so confused, he barely managed the nod.
"Say it," Genma ordered.
"I trust you Genma, but—"
Genma interrupted him before he could finish his sentence. "Then you have two choices here. You can tell me why this bothers you so much, and let me help you like I should have been helping you for years. Or you can keep it all to yourself, but I'm not going to walk on eggshells around you anymore about it."
Raidou starred at him for a minute before shaking his head. "It's not that I don't trust you Genma. I hope you never truly thought that," he said quietly.
Genma lowered his arms and stepped back. "Common, lets go sit on the couch."
Slightly more comfortable, Raidou looked up from his end of the sofa and sighed. "If it's all the same to you, I just don't want to go into it."
"It's not all the same to me. You can't even pass a glass door without getting all depressed on me. It shouldn't have gone on this long," Genma replied.
Raidou swallowed hard, his hands unconsciously gripping at the pillows. Genma sat a little straighter, noting the obvious stress his friend was in. Raidou stared straight ahead at some invisible spot on the wall as she started to speak.
"Eight years ago, I led a group out to scout the Sound boarder…we had intelligence saying that they had begun stationing troops for an attack. It was me, another jonin, and two chuunin. We split up to scout the boarder faster. I teamed up with Hayate. He was still a chuunin back then."
"Alright. We're good on the plan then?" Raidou asked in his no-nonsense way. The group gave him a confident nod. "Maintain radio silence at all times. We'll meet back here in four hours. Good luck, and don't be late."
As their teammates parted, Raidou and Hayate were left alone in the woods. Next to them stood a towering tree that Raidou had stuck with a kunai to designate as their meeting spot. Hayate swung his sword over his back with ease and fell to a knee, ready to spring into the air. He'd always been an energetic kid, and Raidou knew this transferred over into a great amount of stamina. He'd seen Hayate in training, and he was good. In fact, after the mission, he was planning on telling him he'd gladly sponsor him for ANBU as soon as he made jonin. They could always use an incredible swordsman like him.
"We made our way around the boarder, looking for enemy camps, but we didn't find anything. Finally, we had to go back. We were actually pretty happy about the whole thing," Raidou looked at Genma for the first time since he'd started talking. "It's not often bad intel is a very good thing."
Genma gave him a small, understanding smile.
Raidou continued. "It went downhill after we got back to where we were supposed to meet up…"
Raidou and Hayate dropped to the ground from the trees, looking for their teammates. Raidou stumbled slightly as he smelled the night air. He could smell blood. Grabbing the back of Hayate's uniform, he yanked the chuunin behind him. Hayate's hand reflexively reached for the sword on his back, and drew it in a smooth, silent motion.
As they closed on the tree with the kunai stuck in it, they were able to make the faint outline of something on the ground. They both began to rush toward the tree, hoping they would not find what they feared. But just as they started running, the two leaf ninja's found their arms pinned in a jutsu. They toppled to the ground as their ability to balance was gone, and before Raidou could call out anything to his partner, darkness overtook him.
"There. That was the big mistake," Raidou said, starting to stand up. Genma reached over and grabbed the hem of his shirt, yanking him back down. "I truly hope that wasn't where you were planning to end this," he said.
Raidou glared at Genma. "You wanted to know what happened. I made a stupid, rookie mistake and got us caught. As a result of my leadership, two ninjas were killed, and two were badly injured."
"Raidou…" Genma paused. He wasn't sure how to phrase the fact that even if he hadn't taken the time to scope out the area a little better, the deaths of his teammates were not on his hands.
Raidou sighed and leaned back into the sofa, throwing his legs up on the coffee table listlessly. "I know exactly what you're thinking, don't even try it. The leader is always responsible for everything that happens."
"It's a dangerous job."
Raidou snorted. "If I died on a mission because I had an idiot for a team leader, I'd find a way to come back and haunt him for the rest of his days."
"Aw, now I know you don't believe in that stuff. Besides, I think you haunt yourself enough."
"You're the one that wanted to go down this path. I don't need a lecture," Raidou snapped. Genma held up his hands in defeat. "Sorry, you're right. Continue?"
Genma could feel the hesitancy rolling off Raidou like waves. Maybe he'd try a different approach. "You must have done something right to get out of there alive, then."
"More like the fact that messing up everything I set out to do that night led to the bizarre conclusion of our escape," Raidou replied dryly.
The two Konoha shinobi woke up in a small cell. To be more accurate, Raidou woke first. His arms were cuffed behind him and he was sitting against a brick wall. His head throbbed; he could literally feel the blood pulsing through it with every heartbeat. Hayate was on the other side in the same position. There were no windows, just a small, metal door with slats for viewing the room and its prisoners. The slats provided the only light, and Raidou had to squint to make out the rest of the room.
He heard a soft moan from the other side of the cell. "Hayate?" he whispered.
"…Head…"
"I know. Try to stay calm. Concentrate on building up your chakra." Hayate nodded.
He had no idea how much time passed before he heard a set of keys roughly pushed into the door's lock. A large man squeezed past the tiny door before shutting it behind him. He looked from prisoner to prisoner, finally walking towards Raidou when he'd met the man's glare.
"Your friends are dead. In case you didn't know," he stated mildly.
Raidou said nothing, and continued to glare at his captor.
"You'll be dead soon."
Silence.
"Nothing to say? You know how this goes. Easy or hard. I'm fine with either."
The man stood up and made his way to the other side of the cell. "We've had reports that Konoha plans to attack. You're the scouts, aren't you? Where are the rest of your troops? When and where are they going to strike first?"
Raidou gave his head a small shake. "No…"
The man gave a cool smile before removing a long, thin hypodermic needle from a pouch on his belt.
"Tell me what I want to know, and it will be quick. We might even work out some kind of negotiation if you're really good," he said.
"Wait!" Raidou choked out. This was all wrong. "You think Konoha is going to invade?"
"This is not my definition of quick," the man said. He reached into a pocket on his vest and pulled out a small glass bottle. "Pest control," he said with a laugh as he gestured with the bottle. "No, it's really a new formula our T&I researchers developed. We have one for every major organ in the body. It irrevocably kills an area of cells wherever it's injected. The less you're injected, the better."
Raidou looked up with wide staring eyes, struggling to keep his cool.
The interrogator turned his attention the bottle. "What's tonight's special? Ah. Lungs!" He gave the bottle a small toss in the air before catching it. "I'm…breathless with anticipation!" He opened up the bottle and withdrew a large amount into the needle.
"Tell me where your troops are stationed."
"There are no troops," Raidou said, beginning to panic. He couldn't see anyway out of this. They were both going to die.
The man squatted next to Hayate, who had remained silent the whole time. He took out a knife and cut through the vest and shirt he was wearing. Hayate's frightened eyes met Raidou's as his chest was exposed.
"Sorry kid," the interrogator said, not sounding sorry at all. "Looks like there's no way around this one." He plunged the syringe into Hayate's chest and pushed down on the plunger a little. Hayate's breath caught in his throat, and he began coughing. The man pulled out the needle roughly.
"I'll stop. I give you my word. You just tell me what I need to know."
Raidou watched the scene play out, grinding his teeth until he thought they might break. "I'm telling you the truth."
"Then what were you and your buddies doing, running around undocumented in our neck of the woods?"
Raidou looked down at the ground, not watching as he heard Hayate's cry of pain from across the room. When it was quiet, he looked up only to see the man raise his arm to deliver another injection into the panting chuunin.
Raidou couldn't take any more of this.
"I…" Raidou shook his head, trying to reign in his emotions. It had been a long time since he'd truly thought about that night.
Genma scooted down the sofa, closer to his friend, and laid a hand over his forearm. "Take your time," he said softly.
Raidou sucked in a long breath before he began again. "I don't know how I did it, but I managed to get out of the cuffs…"
The sound of his friend in pain gave him the adrenaline he needed; Raidou lunged at the man, ripping free from the binding cuffs, but not without taking damage himself. Both his thumbs broke from the maneuver.
The noise had caused the interrogator to turn, one hand still on the syringe. As Raidou came down, he delivered a fierce blow to the man's face. Raidou watched in horror as the events folded out before him, as if in slow motion. The man's wide eyes stared at him, even as his head flew back with the force of the punch. He lost his footing, and in an attempt to regain control, pushed the rest of the syringe's contents into Hayate as his hand slipped. Hayate hissed before his breath gave a noisy hitch, and his eye's rolled into the back of his head. He slumped forward onto the interrogator, who roughly pushed him away in an attempt to get up. With lightning reflexes, Raidou reached to the kunai on his thigh and slit the man's jugular. Warm blood spurted in pulses over Raidou and Hayate. Leaving his kunai sticking out of the dead man's throat, Raidou threw his partner over his shoulder and flew open the door. Looking up and down the hallway, he took a left and ran.
Raidou felt a tear roll down his face, and ignored it. Genma reached up and swiped at it with his thumb. "Hayate…that's what was wrong with him?"
Raidou nodded, intending to speculate it was that last injection he had inadvertently caused that made him as sickly as it was, but couldn't get the words out. Instead, after a few deep breaths, he acknowledged "After that, Hayate had to work twice as hard as everyone else. He had to figure out how to fight using oxygen from only one damaged lung."
Genma steered the conversation away from Hayate. "What happened next?"
Raidou roughly swiped at his eyes. "I ran until we were outside the building. I thought we were home clear."
Raidou ran as fast as he could with Hayate on his shoulder, and wound up running headlong into a guard.
"Hold it. You didn't think it'd be that easy, did you? Or maybe you are that stupid. Who knows?"
Raidou took a few steps back, slowly realizing he was surrounded. His back hit the wall of the building. He looked around, frantic, desperate…there was a barrel off to his left. Even in his panic, he recognized the chemical structure on the label. Within a split second, he was next to it. He dropped Hayate to the ground and tried his best to smirk at the surrounding troops.
"Well, it was fun while it lasted, but the games over," he said, quickly forming his hands into a fire jutsu.
He looked up, seeing the startled faces of the men, as they realized what he was planning on doing. "Yup, I'm going down and taking you all with me." He held out his hand, and lit the barrel on fire. The enemy troops ran, fleeing the imminent explosion. Not knowing exactly how much time he had left, he quickly stooped to pick up Hayate.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered as he started to run.
He'd just started to pick up speed when he felt the blast. It knocked him off his feet, and he rolled over Hayate to protect him from the searing heat.
Raidou realized he was on fire. Rolling in the grass, he extinguished himself, fighting the agony of the burns and the blood dripping into his eyes. Finally, he gave into the unconsciousness that was slowly engulfing him.
Between the jostle and fits of coughing, Hayate woke up. "Raidou? Raidou!" He looked around the area. The building and surrounding trees were on fire, and if anyone was there earlier, they had fled. Hayate grabbed his team leader under the armpits and began to drag him out of the inferno. He struggled to catch his breath and control his coughing.
Raidou woke up, and opened his eyes. They stung from smoke and blood; he couldn't make anything out. He could feel himself being slowly dragged, and could hear wet, sickly coughing from above. "Hayate?" he called out meekly.
"And that was that. We laid there thinking we were going to die. In reality, Hayate had pulled me halfway to Konoha, and by chance, a genin team stumbled across us."
Genma sat, numb. He had his own horror stories of near captures that gave him the occasional nightmare, but nothing like what his friend had been through.
"It was all for nothing, in the end," Raidou continued. "The Sound had a spy feeding us intel. They knew we were coming the whole time. It was all just an excuse to break a treaty."
Even afterwards, I screwed things up. I…avoided Hayate as much as I could after that. I just couldn't face him. And now I can't, even if I wanted to."
Genma slid off the couch to kneel in front of Raidou. "Thank you for telling me."
Raidou looked off to the side, unsure of what to say. "When I got back, they sealed the case file; partly because the mission was based on false information and part because it got screwed up so badly. Neither of us was ever supposed to discuss it, you know."
"If it hadn't been sealed, do you think you would have?"
"No, but at least it gave me an excuse. The Third made me his body guard after that. It was pretty clear that they didn't want me leading any missions. Hell, they didn't want me going on missions. Probably thought I'd try to get myself killed. I don't even know why I'm still hanging around the administrative building. Tsunade-sama has Shizune. I'm sure she trusts her more than me…" Raidou pondered.
Genma stood and sat back on the sofa next to Raidou, and threw an arm around his shoulders. "Maybe that, or they realized how far you'd go to protect someone. Not a bad trait, there."
"Genma, you made me dredge this up. Can you at least let me wallow for a bit?"
"Now, that is the one thing I can't do. But," Genma stood and offered Raidou a hand, "I can buy you some drinks, and…maybe we can go visit Hayate after this?"
"I don't think so," Raidou said quietly. "I'm not ready yet."
Genma sat back down and put his hand over the scar on his friends face. "I've never seen this as anything but the mark of a dangerous mission on a brave man. Tonight didn't change that. As soon as you see yourself that way, we'll make that visit. Don't make him wait any longer," Genma said.
Raidou nodded. They sat in silence for a while before he spoke again. "I'm not sure when that will be. But I think I am ready for that drink," he said with a small smile.
Genma grinned. His smile faded slightly as he asked "You ok? Really."
Raidou nodded. "I will be."
Author's notes: Oh, the angst! Okay, that was the longest, sappiest oneshot I've written so far. But I hope you liked it anyway. Let me know?
As always, feel free to read into this whatever you want. I see this one way, you may see it another. It's like personalized fic!