I'm not sure about this one, but it's the best I can do at the moment. I may re write it at some point. It's set in Lily and James's seventh year, and is based on a song by Bright Eyes called 'The First Day of my Life', which is an amazing and beautiful song, well worth a listen.

Please R&& and tell me what you think. Constructive critisism is especially welcome.


'So,' Lynette Gareth asked with a sly smile as Lily sat herself down at the Gryffindor table, accompanied by their other friends, Mary Macdonald and Melissa Edgecombe, for breakfast one Sunday morning at the end of winter. 'What's up with you and Potter?'

Lynette had noticed that the pair had been closer than usual these past few weeks. True, this year James Potter had been more grown up and civil towards the girl he fancied, but since the Christmas break, they had been unusually friendly towards each other. It had all started with an argument between Lily and Melissa Green, another girl whom she and Lily shared a dormitory with. Lily had been visibly upset and stormed out of the dormitory, and when herself and Mary Macdonald had eventually found Lily, she was sitting outside in the snow, talking to James. Ever since this event, they had been friendly towards each other, and this was growing day by day. Now, James and his friends sat with the girls at meal times, and the pair frequently sat together in class. Lynette was pleased that her friend appeared to finally be paying the poor guy some of the attention he had craved since the first year.

Now, however, Lily looked edgy at the mention of James's name as she helped herself to a slice of toast.

'I don't know!' she sighed, prodding the butter slightly more aggressively than necessary with her knife.

'Looks like you're a bit more than friendly with him.' Lynette smirked. This was true. Yesterday, James had playfully held onto Lily's arm and they had laughed and flirted with each other all the way to Transfiguration.

'I'm furious with myself!' she exclaimed suddenly.

'Lils, calm down, it's not your fault!' Mary tried to sooth her.

'Yeah, it's alright!' Lynette said, backing up her friend.

'No! It isn't alright!' Lily positively screamed.

The other two girls looked around them slightly embarrassedly, as several heads in the vicinity turned towards them.

'I'm sorry!' Lily whispered as she saw her friends awkward faces. 'It's just I promised myself never to even begin to like James Potter!'

'So you think you do like him?' Lynette asked, eagerly leaning forward.

'I don't know!' Lily whispered helplessly. 'I honestly don't know! And you have no idea how frustrating this is! It's like all those years of being shamelessly hit on and asked out and being embarrassed in front of everyone are meaning nothing in here!' she said, tapping her chest.

'Oh, poor Lils.' Lynette said, sympathetically trying to hide a smirk.

'I've always hated him!' she hissed. 'Why is that changing him?'

Melissa Edgecombe snorted into her porridge, and the other girls turned to look at her questioningly.

'Oh come on, Lily,' she said. 'You have not always hated him.'

'Excuse me?' Lily asked angrily, her temper rising.

'You haven't!' Melissa defended herself.

'Of course I have!' Lily exclaimed, furious. 'Why on earth do you presume I would say something I didn't mean?'

'Lily, hate is a strong word,' Melissa reasoned. 'You have never hated him, you may have disliked him at times, but not hate. Anyway, you haven't disliked him for a while. What do you think all this front you put on in front of him is? Pretending that you think he's about as good as a dead Flobberworm, it was all an act you put on! You may not have realised what you were doing, you were too shocked by your true feelings to recognise how you really feel! Its time you got over your pride and confronted yourself!'

Lily was furious. How dare anyone tell her how she felt about James Potter? She alone knew her true feelings. Get over her pride? Oh, she would do that alright. She stood up, scattering toast everywhere and marched out of the Great Hall. She stormed past some frightened looking Hufflepuff's who were chatting loudly on their way through the Entrance Hall, wrenched open the door and stomped out into the cool, air.

The refreshing air seemed to calm her somewhat, and she breathed it in deeply. She made her way down the steps, and out into the open. It was chilly, and Lily wrapped her arms around herself to protect her from the February air.

Plop.

A drop of rain splashed onto her head. She turned her face skywards to the pale grey clouds.

Plop.

She almost let out a giggle as another raindrop fell onto her cheek. Suddenly, the air around her was full of little drops of water, all plopping onto the grass and cobbled path where she walked, and onto her clothes, where they seeped into the fabric.

She could no longer remember why she was angry. She was so calm now that it seemed odd that only a few moments earlier she had been like a hot cauldron, brimming with anger. The rain and the cool breeze blowing down from the mountains was clearing her mind, just as it cleared the air and filled it with this fresh free scent.

She thought about her friends words. Was Melissa right? Had she been suppressing what she really felt about James all this time, hiding her feeling because she did not recognise them for what they were? It certainly felt that way now, with certain events that had happened between them. It seemed so long ago since she and James had lain on the lawn, just under the windows of the Great Hall watching the snow fall. That had been the turning point.

Suddenly, she knew. She knew what she felt, and she knew what she wanted. She smiled, and her smile widened and widened, until she was laughing out loud. She threw her arms out, and turned her face up to the sky again, still laughing, laughing at her revelation, laughing at what she should have known all along.

She turned and ran back to the castle, and up to the Gryffindor tower.

It was here that she found the person she was looking for.

She scrambled through the portrait hole, excitedly tripping over her feet. She turned the corner and ran directly into someone.

'Sorry!' she gasped breathlessly, looking up to see who she had hit.

'Lily?'

'James!' she exclaimed. 'I was looking for you!'

'Lily, are you ok?' he asked, concernedly. 'You're soaking!'

She looked down at her clothes. She was surprised to see that they were indeed soaking wet. She must have spent more time than she thought wandering outside.

'I went for a walk in the rain.' She said, smiling up at him.

'You should change.' He said, trying to take her elbow and lead her back into the common room. 'You'll catch something.'

'No,' she said, pulling her arm free, not before her body had time to thrill at his touch. 'I need to talk to you.'

He looked at her, amused.

'Well, at least come and sit by the fire and get warm.' He said, taking her elbow again and steering her to the armchairs in front of the fire. 'What's so urgent?'

'I went for a walk just now in the rain,' she told him.

'You said,' he replied, a cheeky grin on his face.

'Don't interrupt me, this is important!' Lily said, looking up into James's eyes, and shivering at what she saw there. 'As I said, I went for a walk, and it was incredible! I can see things so much more clearly now. I see myself more clearly. And I realised something. I realised Melissa was right.'

'Lily, you aren't making any sense.' James said, half smiling, half genuinely concerned.

She poked her tongue out at him.

'I am to me.' She grinned. 'Anyway, my walk.'

'It was incredible, you say.' James said, grinning.

'Yes. It was like I finally knew myself, you know?' Lily said. 'It washed away all my prejudice and pretence of hate that I felt for you. It was like I couldn't see, like there was a fog in front of my eyes, and now its lifted, and I can see what you mean to me. It's as if I've woken up at last.'

All the time she was speaking, she had been looking away from James and into the fire, afraid of what she would see in his eyes, but now she looked up at him.

He was smiling, beaming at her. He looked like all his Christmas's, birthdays and wishes had come at once.

'I'm glad you kept asking me.' She said. 'When you stopped, it made me realise what I was missing.'

'Well, you know,' he said, a soft smile playing on his lips. 'You've got to keep at it, or else regret what might have been. When I stopped asking you, I never stopped loving you, I just grew up a bit. I'd rather have tried all those times and gotten rejections, and hope that one day you might just say yes, than sit there quietly and hidden it in silence.'

'James,' she said, shyly looking into his hazel eyes, her heart beating so fast it was almost a buzz. 'I love you.'

James's smile stretched into a wide grin. Slowly he leaned down towards her, and reached out his hand and gently stroked the side of her face.

'I love you too.' He said gently.

Lily's breathing sharpened as he leaned in closer, and began to move her hair away from her face. She stopped breathing altogether and shivers went down her spine as his lips caressed ear.

'I always have.' He moved his lips away from her ear, and found hers, and they shared their first kiss, there in front of the merry, crackling fire.


Hope you enjoyed reading. Tell me what you think!