A/N: Heh, new to the GoT fanfiction so not sure if Joff is portrayed in the right light but this is what I've seen and read of him...
This partnership is meant to be. Yes I'm writing Not Exactly a Princess still but this one niggled.
"Who are you?" The affected voice made the young woman look up. She didn't blink and just returned to the wooden mechanism at her feet. She pointedly ignored the blonde teenager with a crown on his head. "Excuse me, the King spoke to you!" He hissed and the dark haired woman refused to look up.
"King of what?" She said in a quiet voice. Joffrey had not expected her voice; it was calm and quiet but by no means gentle, the tone was laced with something. There was an undercurrent to it, a silent threat.
"King Joffrey I of the Seven Kingdoms!" He said haughtily. "Who are you and how dare you defy me." The dark haired girl stood up and dusted down her black dress. Joffrey took in the young woman who stared at him without a single emotion flickering on her face, and for the first time felt nervous.
"I am Wednesday Addams and you are in my back garden." She raises on eyebrow and Joffrey is silent for a moment.
"All land is owned by the King." He had to started to bluster, and he was unnerved when the girl Wednesday said nothing and simply stared at him.
"My family are good at unseating Kings." She says after a long pause and she turns her back on him to walk away, her plaits swinging. The blonde boy is stunned for a moment until he strides after her, after all a king does not run.
"How dare you walk away from your King, and talk of treason!" He huffs and almost runs into the back of the strange girl when she stops and slowly spins to look at him.
"This is America, there are no kings here." Her voice is that same emotionless tone and it unnerves him. It is only after she moves away once more that her words sink in; no Kings, how is that possible?
He gives chase all the way back to the house and it is there he stops dead; a willowy woman with thick black hair and a complexion of a corpse is waiting on the top step.
"Wednesday who is your new friend?" Her voice is pleasant enough but something about the mother and daughter makes his skin crawl – not an easy task for a Lannister.
"He says he is a King, he doesn't act like a King." She stands beside her mother on the porch looking down at the now floundering blonde boy. "He is just a spoilt child." Her eyes haven't stopped appraising him but her last comment stung and without thinking he bounded up the three steps and struck her clear across the face.
The air changed palpably. There was silence from both women and the mother was the first to speak.
"He might fit in quite nicely, Wednesday, teach him the Addams ways." Morticia left with a smile, her hobbling dress making her take small delicate steps. Joffrey has never felt scared before – he's always had the Hound or his mother by his side, there had always been someone who would stand up for him and rid him of his enemies, but not anymore. The look on the girl's face is one that promises death, she is a fountain of silent fury, and his rapidly reddening hand print on her cheek stands out against her pale skin. That mark is the promise of revenge.
That was how Joffrey Baratheon found himself suspended by the ankles in the Addams Dungeon for 6 hours. He had screamed until he was blue in the face, until his voice was hoarse and eventually Wednesday Addams let him down in an unceremonious heap, before re-chaining him to the dungeon wall for five days.
There was a moment where his temper got the better of him and he pushed sixteen year old Wednesday Addams into a newly dug grave, his punishment had him hauled into a catapult that launched him clear above the house, plummeting to the ground near the cemetery. That was the moment when they discovered he couldn't die. The smile that spread across the girl's face was horrifying; she had a playmate that couldn't die, that could take all of her abuse (which he would) and survive.
Every time Joffrey retaliated, which was often, Wednesday could think of something a lot more vicious. Her little brother didn't like the blonde boy who called himself King; the podgy child was scared of Joffrey and that made him unbearably smug, until Wednesday locked him in the crypt for three days. With the help of Wednesday Addams, he discovered the many varied uses of electricity, and that had been after he had suspended Pugsley by the ankles over the banister in the hall.
Joffrey also discovered that the Addams' had a lot of unearthly monsters in residence. He had come face to face with a swamp creature when the catapult deposited him there, he had shrieked like a girl when one of the residents of the graveyard upped and moved to sit next to him when Wednesday had chained him to the bench in the centre. He had also fed the furball kept in the cellar that liked to snaffle on Grandmama's Sausages and Marsh Casserole. Joffrey had learnt a lot with the Addams family; finding a dark little niche that both scared and thrilled him, but no matter what scheme he thought up to torture or maim, his hot head was no match for Wednesday's cool calculating one.
"Are you still a King?" She asked one day, after they had fought with ancient swords around the quicksand pit, the pair were laying on the itchy grass around the edge spotting shapes in the grey clouds.
"I will always be a king." He answered quickly and Wednesday sighed. He turned his head to look at her and saw she was staring straight up.
"Then to you I will always be a commoner, but unfortunately for you, I will be the commoner that has bested you on many occasions." She stood up suddenly, her sword tip at his throat, enjoying it when his eyes widened and he gasped.
"Wednesday please." They hadn't tested whether he'd survive having his throat cut and he wasn't so keen to.
"Stand up King and show me what you're made of." Her voice was commanding and he smiled suddenly.
"You would have made a great Queen." He raises an eyebrow, a sign that he has been friends with Wednesday Addams far too long.
"I know." The teen before him presses the blade a little more to his skin.
"Be my Queen?" He asks and rolls out of the way of her sword, the pair beginning to duel once more.
"What's in it for me?" She parries and he ducks to avoid her headshot.
"A lifetime with a vicious King and his admiration." He tries to back her against the gnarled trunk of the dead tree.
"Admiration is easily lost." She quips as she out-steps him and he is backed towards the quicksand.
"For you Wednesday Addams I somewhat doubt that." He feints and the pair are back in the open grass again, blades sounding off one another.
"I am not sure, you seem the boy that gets bored with his toys quite quickly." She swings the blade once more, his doublet opened by the tip but she missed the skin. Frowning at the ruined jacket he lunges, catches the hilt of her antique sword and pulls her body flush with his.
"I would never tire of you Wednesday." He whispers, bringing his lips closer to hers until she stamps on his toe, twirls out of his grasp, taking his sword with hers.
"But you think I am a toy Baratheon." She states and puts the blades as a cross against his throat. "I would not move if I was you King." She arches her eyebrow and a small smile picks up the corner of her mouth. "Isn't it a shame that you have been my plaything for the time that you have been here?" She smiles, drops one blade, keeping the other at his neck and draws rope from the pocket of her trousers she wears when they are duelling. "Turn around King." Her voice is almost a sneer but Joffrey does as she bids, breathing out when she drops the second sword, flinging it behind them but he grunts when she kicks the back of his leg, forcing him to his knees, and he tenses as she binds his hands behind his back.
"Wednesday…" He begins but she silences him when a knife is slipped from her sleeve and pressed to his Adams apple.
"You do not learn King... that a Queen always wins." She pushes his head into the ground, binds his feet, picks up the two swords and walks back towards the house. "I'll save you some dinner if you make it in time." Joff can just tilt his head to see her walk away, the girl with her dark hair in a bun, black shirt and trousers and a pair of riding boots.
The dark souled girl that may have stolen his ice cold heart, his Queen.