LOVING YOU, LOVING YOUR EYES
By cardinal crab
Disclaimer: CCS does not belong to me. Duh.
This story contains slash, and I'm not apologizing or warning you about it because homosexuality is not a crime and does not need any BEWARE sign just for fucking homophobes. If you intend to flame me for writing about the love between two males, well, I hope that you'll get a stick long enough to stick thru your tight, tight arse. Other than that, constructive criticism is very much appreciated. This is my first fanfiction about TxY, and I know that my piece is just * blah * compared to the works out there, but your reviews will not only inflate my ego, it will also earn some poor chaps down the block big, fat smiles from me instead of the usual scowl. Please excuse grammar and spelling mistakes, my Word spellchecker has gone bonkers and my grammar sucks, anyway.
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Chapter One
" You tease….." he mumbled, gently nibbling on my ear. I grinned, and continued to leave soft, open mouth kisses on his shapely neck., while fingering his nipples. He was greatly aroused, and I could see it on his face, and after readjusting my hips under his groin, could feel his hardened crotch. I giggled. I felt quite flattered to know that I caused it, if you know what I mean. Kinomoto Touya is a man of high emotional barriers, and I relish in the fact that I had managed to break part of it, and am powerful enough to arouse him, and make him- tables turned- lust for me. The very thought of it left a feeling of pleasure in my heart, which has been fluttering non-stop for the past few minutes.
Suddenly, I heard a knock against the door. I didn't know if Touya heard it, and even if he did, he ignored it anyway. Thinking it was a cruel figment of my imagination, I continued my exploration of my boyfriends' body. A second later, it repeated again, this time accompanied by a voice. " Touya? Tsukishiro-san? Dinner is ready."
Fujitaka-sensei. As much I respect him and think of him as of a real father, I couldn't help bearing a slight feeling of resentment at him. Of all times to announce dinner-! I sighed, and gently pushed Touya away from the sensuous cavern of mine. My own growing erection is screaming with frustation, and with the power of a kungfu master, I managed to ignore it. I gently tapped Touya on the shoulder, and eyed the door. He got the message and attempted a weak, "Uh, OK otousan. Um, we'll be down in a minute." I could almost hear Fujitaka- sensei smile, and for the millionth time since Touya and I confessed our feelings for each other, I wondered whether he knew about us. He always has this knowing loook in his eyes, that it's quite scary sometimes. Touya told me that I have one too, but I don't quite believe him. Nothing can match my future-father-in-law's – as I enjoy calling him in my mind, I'm too shy to call him that in front of Touya— ' I know everything that is going on with you and you can't hide it from me' look.
We waited for a little while, and when we knew that he had left –with that smile of his, of course- I sighed and dropped on my back on the bed. Touya followed soon after, and we lay next to each other, our fingers entwined, and I rested my head on his shoulder.
" I really want to have sex right now," Touya whined softly. I smiled – have I mentioned how much I love driving him crazy?—and moved up to kiss him passionately on his mouth. It lasted for a long time, and when we broke off I could see lust laced in his eyes – beautiful, beautiful midnight blue orbs, I thought poetically—and closed my eyes gently. Perhaps I could get on with life without his eyes, but that will be one torturous hell of a life. Knowing that his eyes could keep me rooted to his body forever, I decided not to stare at them anymore. Sex is important, it's vital in our relationship, but life has to go on, whether I like it or not. That is a tough rule to follow sometimes.
I sat up quickly, and said softly, " Your father is waiting for us, you know." Touya pouted, but he got up anyway. He can sense it when I am serious about something, and this time, I am serious not to destroy the great relationship his father and I share. It might be an overreacting sense of guilt, but I don't want Fujitaka sensei to feel that I am keeping son away from his family life ever since we decided to pursue the relationship. It's just dinner, but that is already strong enough to be a restriction in our sex life.
We dressed quickly, and soon we joined Fujitaka-sensei and Sakura-chan at the dinner table. Touya and Sakura argued about last breakfasts' pancakes, and I just smiled, not really understanding their conversation. Fujitaka- sensei asked me about Seidou's latest soccer craze, and I tried not to fidget under his eyes as I explained the scoring teams.
Touya and I held each other close when we arrived in his room again- obviously to continue what we had left half an hour ago. But somehow, my heart was not in it, and Touya noticed it in a matter of seconds. "What's wrong?" he asked, and I pressed against his fingers as he played with my hair.
Lying on my back, with Touya beside me, propped up on his elbow; I stared into his eyes. Kind, sweet, gentle eyes, always ready to soothe my troubled heart and heal my pain; gorgeous, lustful, passionate, libidinous eyes that could turn me into a sex-crazed monster in a matter of seconds; sharp, scary, piercing eyes that could leave you tranfixed with fear, that you actually prefer his boxing your ears instead of staring you down. His eyes remind me of his father's'. They made me feel guilty, leaving an uncomfortable feeling in the bottom of my stomach. I told him so.
" Why?" he asked me, not understanding. In a way, I don't either. But what I do know is that I am tired of hiding our love from him. I want him to know. I want his blessings. I want him to accept me as an intregal part of Touya's life, not just a best friend who enjoys spending his time with his son and daughter. Quietly, I spilled my longings to Touya. He listened without uttering a word.
I felt a little foolish suddenly. What right do I have to ask Touya to out himself to his father? Both father and son share an unique relationship where understanding plays an important part. But not many fathers would like to know that their son, their only son, worthy enough to bring forward their family name, is a homosexual. I felt silly. I know that I should respected Touya's wishes to not to expose his sexuality and our friendlier-than-friends relationship. Touya avoided my gaze, and I regretted my words. I know that Touya feels nervous, and is not willing to sacrifice their great father-son friendship. Not for me, anyway.
I sat up and I said, " Touya, I'm sorry. I really am. Just forget about it, okay? He doesn't have to know. It's okay. I'm sorry." I ranted, praying to all the gods in heaven that he is not angry at me. I started to apologize again when he got up and hugged me tight. I froze, not knowing what to do, but after a few seconds I relaxed. He pulled away after some time and said, " You are right, Yuki. I guess I have to do it, if not now, then later, anyway." I opened my mouth to protest, but he continued, " You do understand that we would have to face his wrath if he feels….. uncomfortable about us?" I nodded mutely. " Will that be fine with you? You have to be ready, you know," his eyes searched my face, and then I realised- he was not scared for himself, but he was nervous if I could get deeply hurt during the process. He was scared for me.
I felt deeply touched, and I kissed him softly, pulling him down on me. Soft, soft lips. Beautiful, beautiful eyes. I sighed happily as pleasure clouded my every nerve; our eyes locked as we quietly made love, treasuring each moment as if we would never feel each other's' body again.
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Well, is it okay? I have this crazy idea in my head, and I just gotto totally write it down. It's probably a litle weird….. I doubt it will be well received, but comments will be helpful. I'm sorry if I sounded harsh up there, but I've just had a talk with some faraway cousins and discovered that in their opinion, gays and lesbians should be burnt to death or thrown into jail with the keys swallowed. I've tried my best to ignore homophobes, but it's tough. I am a homosexual and I'm proud of my sexuality and it's sick when I can't pummel them to the ground to knock some sense into those bastards. If I'm out to my family, I guess I can, but I'm not, and most probably will never be…..*sniff*
Sorry for writing all this bullshit…. Well, please read and review!!!! Plus do tell me whether you would like a chapter 2!