Set once Danny tells Lindsay about the cheating. If you are still in denial, don't read.
"Lindsay, please! Lindsay, hold on…"
Danny was still following her. As if he hadn't got the message before.
"Danny, I don't want to talk to you." She said, slowly and clearly, as if speaking to someone hearing-challenged, and very slow. "Go away! Leave me alone!" She ran. Running was one of the only ways to get the pain out of her body – as if she left it behind. She couldn't stop running when she had been a teenager. It was too painful to slow down.
She loved him. He had hurt her, and yet she still loved him. Her insides felt like they had been tortured. Especially her heart, which had been pulled out, stomped on, and tossed in a corner. She had thought he liked her, even – and she hated herself for thinking this – loved her back. But now… everything felt different. She felt so mixed up, she wanted to be sick, to cry, to see him. She didn't know whether she wanted to kiss him or kill him, either seemed good to her. She was really confused – did he love her? She'd thought he did, and now…She wasn't sure if he even liked her anymore. Did she love him now? At this thought, a fresh wave of tears threatened to engulf her body. She felt like she couldn't stop loving him, no matter how much she hated him at the moment. She had to keep on running. Where to, she didn't know.
She blamed herself. Everyone close to her had been hurt. She hurt Danny, as he had shut her out following Ruben's death. So she had decided to allow him to come to her. She was frightened of saying the wrong thing, making things worse. If she had said something… If she had been a better girlfriend, this might never have happened.
She stopped running – her legs were excruciating. This bit she hated, when she slowed down and all the pain came flooding back. Everything about her body was painful now. Physically and emotionally. She had had enough of living and the pain it brought. She'd spent every working day trying to forget. But being surrounded by dead bodies and distraught family members didn't help. So she threw herself into the science.
It was too much to bear. She didn't know where she was, she couldn't see the crime lab anywhere. She wouldn't go back there, anyway. She couldn't face it. She couldn't face living. She took the lift of the tallest building she could see. There was no one on earth who would miss her. All her family and friends were…wherever people went. She had always wondered about an afterlife. She didn't think hell could be as bad as this hell on earth she was living. She wasn't crying anymore. She didn't think she had a single tear left to shed. She reached the roof. However, she saw two teenagers making out, obviously from the apartments below. They had their whole life ahead of them. Funny how quickly your teenage years could turn upside down. She looked away quickly. Relationship memories were too painful. She'd once kissed Danny like that. It made her sick to think, now…
Ignoring them completely, and they didn't notice her, she walked to the edge and looked out over the unfamiliar street of New York. She thought of her parents, who had passed away, her high school best friends, whom she had never found anyone who she was that close to again. Until Danny. He was the first guy she had allowed herself to fall for. She closed her eyes and jumped.
Down, down, down she fell. And then there was nothing. Just blackness.
The pain had gone.