My First Fanfic. Hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: Gintama is the work of Sorachi Hideaki. In other words, it ain't mine.
It is a hot day in Edo. No surprise there since it is midsummer and earth occurred problems that made it sultrier, such as global warming.
"I think my skin is melting." Kagura said in a lethargic tone. The hot weather made her listless.
"I'm quite positive that my body is burning now." Gintoki said while joining the glasses wearing boy who happen to be sitting in front a fan.
"You two should stop being so negative." Shinpachi tried to cheer them up. Suddenly, an idea came to his mind. He grabbed the TV remote on the table and pressed the "on" button. His actions had result a snowy picture to appear at the screen of the TV box.
The projected image indicated a weather reporter standing in a certain harbor. "Hello viewers, Ketsuno Ana here." She smiled charmingly; the smile made Gintoki, her loyal fan venture towards the telly. "It seems that the weather is very hot today. So, be sure to bring your umbrellas and apply sunscreen before going outdoors."
"Yeah, yeah, like some idiot will go out in a day with such frigging high humidity." Kagura commented. When the news broke into a commercial, she walked towards the refrigerator, hoping to find food to satisfying her growling stomach in there.
"Sadaharu, can you move aside?" The over sized dog that was currently cooling himself with the helpful machine rolled aside, granting its master's wish. Kagura's effort was not in vain, she found herself some popsicles.
"Ara? Gin-Chan is hiding food from us, again." She was not pleased with the silver hair samurai's behavior but decided not to tell the other Yorozuya about it, so she can savor the whole collection. She eyed at her companions. Shinpachi was fanning himself with a magazine; Gintoki was sitting in front of the telly, waiting eagerly the commercial to end so he can see his idol's face. Great now I can enjoy these little treasures in peace.
Behind a couch, Kagura attempted to peel the wrappers silently, so they would not notice. But before she can do that, a news caught her attention and she just abandon the popsicles. "The harbor is having a fishing contest this afternoon. Winners will get a profusion prize. The first prize is a ticket to Hawaii and 50000 yen prize money, second prize consist three coupons for an all you can eat buffet, that will be held in Lam's Seafood and 30000 yen prize money, third prize include a stack of Sokonbu sponsored by the Sokonbu Company and 10000 thousand yen prize money."
"We are going to the harbor!" Gintoki and Kagura announced in unison. In an instance, they both equipped themselves with fishing tools and a bucket. Shinpachi sighed instead of being startled at the situation. He had long been grown use to their reactions when it came to money/ Sokonbu.
Gintoki and Shinpachi rode the scooter towards their destination while the Yato girl traveled on her pet dog. Once the Yorozuya reached the harbor, sea breezes blew towards their direction, filling their nose with salty scent of seawater. "Oi Shinpachi, stop staring and carry these along until we find a ideal fishing spot." Kagura commanded, handing him the buckets and fishing tools.
"Hey I am not your laborer. Stop ordering me around" Shinpachi protested. But all he earned is a smack from kagura. "Just do as I say four eyes!"
Shinpachi adjusted his glasses, which frame has been crooked while receiving the strike. "Aye, aye madame." he uttered. Under his breath, he murmured "Why am I the one who always get picked?"
Gintoki who was observing them the whole time said "If we don't hurry the 'ideal fishing spot' you are talking about will be taken by others."
"What's the rush? If that particular spot is dominated, we can kick that bastard ass until he surrenders it to us!" Kagura balled her fist, displaying the meanest she had ever put on.
"Mister you need to draw a paper out of this box before you register for the competition." a middle age man said politely. He handed out a box to Gintoki.
"Huh?" Gintoki was confused but did as the man instructed. "Twenty two?" Gintoki unfolded the crumpled paper and read the numbers imprinted on it.
"That's so unfortunate. You had just picked out the worst fishing spot. Well good luck anyways." the man informed them.
"If you don't give us he best them spot, I'll smash your d*ck." Kagura threaten the poor guy until he surreders them the particular paper.
Shinpachi gulped, he was horrified by the Yato girl unusual behavior. When finding a spot, Shinpachi whispered something in Gintoki's ear."What's wrong with Kagura-Chan today? She seems a bit weird."
"I have three deductions. A) She is actin' weird because of the weather. B) She's way into Sokonbu since it's the third prize C) She is havin' her period. Do you know that even Nunally (from Code Geass) will be as wild as your sister during her period." Gintoki noted.
"Yeah..." Shinpachi paused. "Hey what do you mean by my sister being brutal?"
"Don't be too upset about that. The fact is, no matter how violent your sister is, the Gorilla Stalker would never give up. So, if your sister can't find a husband, the Gorilla is still available." Gintoki teased.
"It is not nice slander others behind their backs." Hasegawa walked towards them with a fishing rod in his left hand.
"Ara? Madao is participating in this competition too?" Kagura asked.
"Of course. I might not look like it but I'm good in fishing." Hasegawa took the opportunity to brag.
The trio blinked, not quite believing him.
"Even though you are really as good as you said, our perspective on you will never change." Kagura said. "Yeah you're still the same good for nothin' ol' man." Gintoki words caused Hasegawa more depressing than ever.
"Gin-San!" Shinpachi tried to shut the samurai's mouth up for good.
"Eh? Brother in law and you guys are here too? What a coincidence. So where's Otae-San?" Kondo was glad to see them The head of the Shinsegumi then patted Shinpachi's shoulder as a sign of affection.
"Get your hairy hands off Shinpachi, you Gorilla," Kagura did not said this to defend him but was merely trying to pester Kondo with her "hairy hands" remark.
A handcuff happened to appear out of nowhere cuffed her hands. "Too bad China, you are currently arrested for harassing a police officer." A sandy haired preteen say.
"Damn you sadist! Let go of my hand!" Kagura squawked.
"Oi, oi, are we here to get caught by some officers who like arrestin' others for their delight instead of fishin'?" Gintoki complained.
"Rules are rules Danna. There is nothin' personal 'bout it." Sogo said in his regular deadpan voice.
"Che. All I know is our nation is doomed. Thanks to certain officers who use the rules in benefiting them self."
"I agree with you Gintoki. Our nation will corrupt if the police officers continue to act arbitrarily." Katsura walked towards the group. The Joi resistant wore his pirate suit as a disguise, not to mention his eye patch with Elizabeth's picture on it.
"Zura?" Gintoki was surprise by his sudden entrance. "He is tend to be caught with such a disguise."
"It's not Zura. It's Ka-" Kagura and Shinpachi kicked the terrorist in his face to prevent him to say his real name.
"Katsura-San please stop referring your name." Shinpachi warned.
"Oi, you really look familiar. Did I meet you before?" Hijikata who was smoking next to Kondo asked.
"Shit! He had been found out." Shinpachi thought.
Luckily, Gintoki came to his rescue. "Oh I know! You must have met him in Okama Bar (a gay bar Saigo runs). You work there right? Zura-Chan"
"It's not Zura. I-" Once again, he was kicked. But the difference is, his manhood was the victim this time because Gintoki substituted the kids.
"Don't treat me as a gay. I prefers woman over man." Toshiro claimed, lighting his second cigarette with a mayonnaise bottle shaped lighter.
"If you think you look cool than you're wrong." Gintoki decided to mock him further.
"Why you..." Hijikata was about to unsheathe his sword when a young woman came by.
"Er excuse me but the competition is about to start now. Please find the place you have been arranged to sooner." the woman informed them.
"Gin-Chan those bastard are following us. Don't tell me their spot is next to ours." Kagura can't bear at the idea of fishing near to the sadist. Somehow, her heart thump faster than they normally do when she is near him.
What am I thinking. I would rather kiss the Gorilla's butt than admitting he was cute. Kagura kept telling herself.
"How in the world can that be possible." Gintoki laughed as though as that is a joke.
Unluckily, the Yorozuya did really end up fishing next to the Shinsegumi officers. "Yeah like how in the world..." Gintoki voice trailed off.
"Hey Gin-Chan you're the one who assure this wouldn't happen" Kagura give him the "you are so unreliable" look.
"That's strange. Ketsuno Ana did say I will have a great day during 'Dark Horoscope'." He hooked an earthworm on the fishing hook and accidentally hurt his palm in the process.
"So much for having a great day." both Kagura and Shinpachi say at the same time.
"Yes! We caught the total of five fish." Sogo announced. "Oi Danna how many fish have you caught there?" He glanced at the Yorozuya's empty bucket and snickered.
"Che. The fishes you caught are so puny. We intended to catch the big ones out there. That's why we need more time than common people." Gintoki said while wiping the blood that trickled out from his wound on his Kimono.
"'Let's see which side catches the most fish then. The losers will need to obey the winner's order for a whole week." Kondo said.
"If we win, I will definitely have Shinpachi to help me date Tae-chan!" Kondo thought happily.
"Deal!"
For the next few hours, they tried their best to catch as much fish as possible.
"How's it goin'? We've scored up to twenty fishes now." Gintoki boasted.
Sogo picked up his Bazooka. He aimed at the buckets that was filled with fishes . "That's animal cruelty, Danna. Let me free the poor aquatic animals."
"Bang"
"Watch your aim idiot." Kagura blocked the attack with her umbrella.
"Hey China, I think you are the one who should pay attention to what you are knocking." Sogo grinned triumphantly.
"Splash" Kagura turned her head around to find the source of the sound. She realized she had accidently knock a bucket into the sea. Kagura stopped fighting and squatted down.
She gaped at the vast, blue sea."Gin-Chan why's the sea blue instead of red?" Kagura asked. Gintoki gave her a punch on the head rather than answering her question."Oi, don't try to change the subject. We have lost one third of our gain due to your clumsy actions."
"Calm down Gin-San we still have t-" Shinpachi said.
"Boom" Okita fired his Bazooka two time straight. The two remaining buckets and fishes in them turned into ashes in a blink of an eye.
Sakata Gintoki was not happy about it. He threw his wooden sword at his opponent's container which is holding the fishes. "Bulls eye." An sharp cracking sound was heard. The container broke into halves.
"Sorry to interrupt your fight. But the administers disqualified you from this competition because you are making such a ruckus." the previous woman said.
At the prize giving ceremony, Hasegawa was announced as the victor. He received a heap of greenies that can choke a hippo and a ticket for a leisure trip. Is luck coming back to this vagrant? Answer is still: no.
"Hasegawa give me those money." Gintoki instructed. He attempt to seize them from Madao's hand and planned to treat himself with parfaits later. That is when Hasegawa lost his grasp on the money (ticket too), they were scattered in the wind and the air flow bought them straight into the seawater.
Meanwhile the results were continued being announced."The third prize go to Pirate Zura. He had caught a total of twenty five fish."said the middle age man that Kagura threatened earlier.
Kagura brows furrowed in confusion. Why the heck is Zura getting my Sokonbu? It isn't fair! let me beat the crap out of him.
After a few minutes, the Yato girl finally found Katsura. She immediately punch him."Ouch! Leader what's that for?" Katsura said in pain.
"Give me all the Sokonbu or I will kill you." Kagura said threateningly.
"Please forgive me. I traded all my prize money and Sokonbu for this Famicon." Katsura explained.
"What? You exchanged them for some outdated video game?" Kagura continued punching him.
Epilogue
"So we went back here empty handed." Gintoki said depressingly.
"My skin got tanned but all we get is nothing." Kagura looked at her darkened skin.
'My, my, don't be so discouraged." Shinpachi hoped to lighten up the mood. "Ah! I almost forgot that I saved some popsicles in the freezer. Let's share it together."
"Oops! So the popsicles are actually Shinpachi's. Should I tell him about what happened to them?" Kagura felt a pang of guilt hit her but shrugged them off.
Please review. Oh and I hate to be so damn negative but I did have to admit my writing skills are quite cheesy. Feel free to point out the mistakes I made.
