Messing with Humans

AN: I was sitting re-reading my other flick "Cullen Chat Chaos" when I got hit by a idea (don't worry I didn't even get a burise lol *winks). Emmett mentions the toxic stickers then Edward points out he needs to heed them especially around humans a.k.a Mike. I laughed when I realized that would be a great one-shot. Though I'll set it up for more in case I get inspired or somebody gives me a good scenario. So here it goes enjoy!!!

Emmett: Either say it or I will eat your Teddy Bear

Kiki:…I don't have any Teddy Bears Em.

Emmett: What kind of girl are u?

Kiki: Well…I have a few but not very emotionally attached to them

Emmett: Fine…uh…HA I WILL EAT YOUR FAVORITE GARFIELD TOY!!!
Kiki: EMMETT YOU (insert curse word of choice)?!!! OKAY I DON'T OWN TWILGHT IT BELONGS TO THE GREAT STEPHEINE MEYERS NOW BRING THAT GARFIELD BACK OR ELSE I WILL LIGHT THE JEEP!!!
Emmett: See? Wasn't that hard was it?

Kiki: *Glares* you shall pay dearly for this Emmett….nobody threatens Garfield and gets away with it.

P.S-Pre New Moon and doing it from Bella's POV just because it's easy. Oh and Bella has her cast off. Lol. Wow am such a Twilighter if I remember to mention the littlest detail like that…lol!

Messing with Humans: Mike

Bella's POV

It was the next to last day of school. Emmett, Rose, Jasper and the other seniors were wondering around doing nothing. Emmett and Rose were hanging with us while Jasper was with Alice in her classes. It was the end of the day and we were in Edward's and my Biology class. It was hot and stuffy which was fine with me though it was probably going to storm later the clouds were dark and menacing like Alice just before she drags me on a shopping trip. The walls were bare the only thing left on the walls were old pieces of masking tape helped mark how long the dust had been collecting on the walls. The stuffed animals were packed half-heartily in boxes on the floor. The cabinets were full of the equipment they had used all locked away till next year ( did very little of this; he got most of us to do the packing for him claiming that it was to keep us out of trouble. Edward said though that the real reason was he just hates doing it so he gets the students to do it. Lazy bum.) Everyone was in a tired stupor from the heat and impatient to start summer vacation. Mr. Vanner was talking to another teacher in the hallway when Emmett thought up and pulled one of the greatest yet stupidest stunts of the century.

"Man…this is boring." Emmett muttered. Edward rolled his eyes.

"Love hanging with you too bro."

"Come on Bella do something funny." Emmett whined poking me in the arm that was not wrapped around Edward.

"What you want me to try and do Jumping Jacks and crack my head open?" I said sarcastically.

"Yeah!" Rose and Edward smacked Emmett on the back of the head that if he had been human could have easily taking the top of his skull off.

"Emmett…" growled Edward.

"Sorryyyy. Jeez chill pill little bro." I sighed and leaned back on Edward taking in his heavenly scent. Mike noticed and was glaring slightly.

"Mike Newton is realllly hitting my last nerve." Muttered Edward. Emmett glanced up from looking at Rose (note I said "up") and saw Mike busy himself by talking to Tyler. Emmett glanced over to the front desk where all the leftover chemicals for the year were sitting then back at Mike then back at the chemicals. Edward frowned then raised an eyebrow.

"Emmett I wouldn't do that."

"Do what?" asked Rose looking at her husband. Emmett chuckled then leaned in and whispered,

"I was thinking that I could freak out Newton." I glanced at the desk then him.

"Are you crazy?! Emmett that would get you in deep!"I hissed. Emmett chuckled.

"Come on Bella, it would be funny and you know it!" I sighed.

"Yeah but won't Mike notice when you NOT die or something?" I pointed out.

"I am with Bella. Emmett, don't do it." Said Rose glaring at him. Emmett sighed.

"Come on it will be funny and priceless!" I know just how to do it too!" Emmett complained.

"No Emmett." Rose said in a final voice.

"Just text Al and see if it does work if it doesn't she'll tell us!" Emmett begged. Edward sighed and pulled out his phone. I saw that there was a text:

Hey, it will work let Em have his fun or we'll hear nothing but grief for the rest of the summer. It is going to be ROFL worthy. Lol, Al P.s-Please get a shot 4 Jazz

Edward sighed and looked over to Rose.

"Al says it'll go off perfectly and to get a shot for Jasper. Sorry Rose." Emmett grinned wide and chuckled in an evil tone.

"This is going to be awesome!" Edward wasn't too impressed though I could see the smirk playing at the edge of his lips. I sighed.

"I want nothing to do with this." I grumbled. Emmett nodded. The bell rang and we took our time getting up. Everyone but Mike and we were still in the room. Coach Capp was going to be late according to Edward (something about flirting with Ms. Cope and forgetting the time). Emmett snuck up to the front and picked up the nastiest looking chemical there. I had no idea what it was but it sure wasn't no health drink.* Emmett sloshed it around a couple of times and Mike looked at Emmett then me and I shrugged.

"I wonder what this would taste like?" he asked, looking over at Mike. Mike went wide eyed and said,

"I dunno but I wouldn't drink that." Mike's voice was higher pitched than usual either from the thought of Emmett drinking the stuff or Emmett talking to him. I was betting the latter.

"Umm, what do you think Edward?" Edward pressed his lips together to stop from laughing and said,

"I don't know either but I wouldn't." Emmett then glanced with a wicked glance at Mike.

"Hmm, hey Mike sure you don't wanna taste?" Mike eyes threatened to pop out of their sockets.

"NO way man." Emmett shrugged. "Okay." And with that Emmett took a swig. Rose and I both put a hand on our mouths so we wouldn't laugh. Edward yelled at Emmett and Mike let out a small yell. Emmett paused then pretended to have fits and saying,

"AKKK I'M DYING!" Mike yelled,

"I'll get the teacher!" and ran out. As soon as he did Emmett straightened up and started laughing with Edward.

"That was mean you know." Glared Rose though it didn't reach her mouth that was in a half smile.

"That's what he gets for eyeing off my little sister." Emmett grinned nudging me and almost knocking me over.

"Come on before he gets back." Chuckled Edward taking my hand. We snuck off just as Mike came back with , Coach Capp and the Principle. We (as in Emmett and I, Rose went with Edward to his other class for a second so he could come back to meet us) where sitting in the gym talking when Couch Capp came finally showed up twenty minutes after us.

"Emmett, Bella can you two please come to the office?" He was frowning at us especially Emmett. I looked over at Emmett who shrugged and so we followed him to the office where Rose and Edward were already there with a very mad Mike. Oh boy. Edward and Rose were perfectly at ease so I tried to stay calm. I went and stood beside Edward who smirked at me.

"Alright you four, Mike here came running in claiming that Emmett drank some chemicals and said that you three Rose, Edward, and Bella were there two. Explain." Snapped the Principle. Emmett shrugged.

"I don't know teach. I'm walking and talking. Nothing wrong with me I haven't drunk anything funny lately." The Principle looked at me and Edward. We both shook our head and Rose did the same. The look on Mike face made me regret the whole thing. But then when I remembered that he had flirted bad (as in a lot and very poor done) with me last week when Edward skipped I rethought my pity. Seeing how we were prefect students and looked really cute and innocent (well the other three looked cute though Edward would argue differently…)

"Okay Mike office now!" sighed the Principle. "You can all leave." As soon as we did the bell rang and we were the first in the parking lot. The three of them started laughing.

"Did you see his face priceless!" laughed Emmett. I frowned.

"I don't know that was mean what if he gets suspended?" Edward chuckled and shook his head.

"Nah he won't. He'll just be stuck in the detention room all tomorrow that's it." I was still frowning when Edward raised an eyebrow and said,

"Don't feel too bad for him sweetheart, he was asking for it." I narrowed my eyes.

"How so?" Edward sighed then said,

"When he glared at us he was thinking how he could easily get you by figuring out what cologne I wear and doing his hair like mine. He has Jessica and still won't give up plus thinks you have the same I.Q as her." I sighed and nodded.

"Okay, he did earn it." Edward laughed. We reached the BMV and the Volvo and Alice and Jasper were already there smiling wide.

"Well?" asked Jasper and Edward showed him his phone. Jasper took one look and started laughing too. As we got into the cars Emmett chuckled,

"It's fun messing with humans."

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Emmet: GAH WHAT HAPPENED TO MY CLOSET?! EVERYTHING IS PINK NOOOOOO!!!!

Kiki: Ha. That is what you get for threatening Garfield. Bwhahaha.

Emmett: Alice, how could you let her!?

Kiki: Easy, gave me an excuse to shop!

Emmett: traitor

Kiki: Hahaha. Anyway, Kinda a lame story but I wasn't too sure how far to go so there you go. Heehee, poor Mike. I tried to spell the chemical that they used to use to preserve animals but I just couldn't spell it wayyyy beyond my horrible spelling knowledge (and I couldn't even spell knowledge). Lol that was the stuff he was drinking if you were wondering. Lol.

Later, Kiki