JJ sat behind her desk, rubbing her temples wearily. This pace was going to kill her or drive her insane, whichever came first. She cradled her head in her arms and stared at the picture of Henry. It had been too long since she'd spent quality time with him and yet she loved being back here, too. She was beginning to understand how Hotch felt. At least she was in the same country as her son.
Someone knocked on her door and she looked up to see Dave standing there, a bottle of Scotch and two glasses in his hands. "I thought you could use a drink after the day we've had."
"Come in and pour me a glass," she replied tonelessly, watching him close the door. "Could this day get any worse?"
"Considering it's over in about fifteen minutes, I would say not. Jen, what's going on? There's more to this than just the caseload."
"I forgot that you can read people so well, Dave. Will's asked for a trial separation. He wants to take Henry to New Orleans for a few weeks, until I'm done with this…crap. It's like all the unsubs are deciding to be assholes now." She gulped at the alcohol and held out the tumbler for a refill.
"You're his mother, Jen. He can't just take him without your permission. We'll stand behind you on this."
"But he has a point. I'm not home enough."
"And if the roles were reversed, would you do this to him?" She couldn't meet his eyes, knowing he spoke the truth. "I thought not." He sipped at the drink, staring into the amber liquid. "So, how about Strauss?"
"Cutting loose two hundred pounds of baggage can free a soul." JJ also knew she'd been Skyping Hotch, but figured Dave didn't need to know that. Their leader deserved some privacy, even if he was making odd decisions. There was no denying the woman had changed, though.
"I felt the same way when I cut myself loose from my ex-wives. Three bad decisions." He shook his head. "You know, as a profiler, I should have realized they weren't the ones for me." His gaze softened and she smiled at him.
"I thought I'd made the right choice, too. Turns out love makes even profilers blind." Dave laughed mirthlessly and slammed back the rest of his drink. "He's not expecting me home tonight, Dave."
"And you're hurting and exhausted. I'll take you home, but not for what you think you want." He stood and held out his hand to her. JJ took it, letting him help her to stand. The alcohol had gone to her head and she stumbled a bit, falling into his open arms.
"Looks like I'm falling for you, Dave," she said with a laugh, trying to break the sudden tension.
"I'll always try to catch you, Jen." She relaxed against him, happy for just a moment to have someone to lean on, who wouldn't judge her, wouldn't yell at her. "Is it really that bad?"
JJ nodded and he rubbed her back. "Disney gave me unrealistic expectations. You'd think, with the job we do, I'd know better than to expect perfection." A few tears found their way down her face and he brushed them away with his thumb.
"We always want things to be perfect, Jen. It's part of the human condition."
It was her turn to laugh without mirth, and he pulled her into a tight hug. She let herself cry on his shoulder, all the tension and anger of the last few weeks pouring out of her. "Dave, I just don't know how much longer I can hold on. Everything just keeps building up and I feel like I'm going to explode."
JJ felt his lips brush against her forehead and she snuggled further into his embrace. "Ah, Jen, you know what tears do to me." He sat down in the chair once more, pulling her down onto his lap. She rubbed her face in his shoulder, breathing in his scent. "You'll be all right, honey. Just lean on me."
She nodded absently against his chest, trying to get control of her emotions. The storm passed and she sat up, pulling away from him. "Thank you, Dave." As she sniffled, she rested her head once more on his shoulder. "I want to make things work with Will, but I want to feel once more. Which choice should I make?"
"The one that's best for your son, Jen. In the end, he matters more than your feelings for Will or your desire to touch the fire. It would burn, JJ, just not in the way you expect." He kissed her once more, softly, on her cheek, and she sighed.
On the desk, her cell phone rang and she got up. "That's Will." He nodded and she went over to her desk, grabbing the phone. "Hi honey. No, I'm done for the night, and have tomorrow off, as long as no new case comes in. I was hoping we could spend the day together, with Henry. Wonderful." She looked up to where Dave had sat moments before, only to find him gone, the only trace of him left was the strong scent of his cologne. "I'll see you in twenty minutes, Will."