Disembodied Chapter One
The citizens of Ikebukuro have become familiar with the roaring sound of their headless biker zipping through the streets. However, tonight the tires seemed to screech with more urgency, and the engine growled with fury. Celty was on her way to a certain information broker's apartment to give him a piece of her mind, as one would after being treated as she had been earlier. She grimaced at the memory of showing up to a job that Izaya had sent her to, only to find herself corned by police with stun guns. For this, she would give him hell. She showed up at the informant's door, and knocked sternly as if to threaten anyone inside. Moments later the door opens to reveal a smug looking Izaya.
"Did you have any trouble?" he asked with a smirk. Celty felt her blood begin to boil. "Come on in."
Izaya opened the door, making way for the pissed off Dullahan to enter. Celty entered the apartment, and began to furiously type profanities on her blackberry. Izaya waited for her to finish, then read her words.
[Why would you set me up?! You fucking asshole!] Izaya chuckled at her rage, which only made her angrier.
"I wouldn't have sent you there if I thought you couldn't handle it," Izaya replied. Celty's fingers fly across her keyboard, beginning to type another string of insults for him to read, but was interrupted by another's voice, one that she thought she recognized.
"Hey, Izaya, could you grab me a towel?" Celty turned to see a naked, dripping blonde boy in the bathroom doorway. Kida panicked and slammed the bathroom door yelling "Nevermind! Um, I got one!"
Celty could not believe what she had just witnessed. She knew Izaya was disgusting, but this is beyond her wildest imagination. She turned back to face the informant to see his face frozen in shock and what seemed to be fear. This lasted only for a second, as he was quick to find his composure.
"Don't mind him, he needed a place to stay, so I offered him a room here (platonically)." He lied through his teeth. Celty wasn't buying it, he could tell from the way she crossed her arms with attitude. Noticing this and growing anxious, he continued to say "Isn't it terrible, the homeless crisis? You are lucky to have a home yourself, now you should go to it," he said while pushing her out the door, "Bye, Celty, see you later, have a good night!"
Izaya sighed with relief when she was finally out the door, and turned his attention to the naked boy in the bathroom. He grabbed a towel from his closet and brought it to the bathroom. Before he had a chance to knock, an arm swiftly shot out and grabbed the towel, slamming the door before he could be seen.
"It's okay, she's gone." Izaya comforted him. Hearing this, Kida swung open the door revealing his panicked expression.
"Oh God, that was terrible!" he exclaimed while wrapping the towel around himself. "Did she see me?"
"I don't know," Izaya replied, "she doesn't have eyes." Kida was unsure if he should feel comforted or disturbed by this.
"It's nothing to worry about Kida, she wouldn't dare cross me." Izaya explained. At that Kida relaxed a bit, Izaya was not one to mess with.
Meanwhile, Celty was on her way home with interesting news for Shinra. She drove home, smiling all the way, or she would be, if she had a face. Arriving home, she burst open the door in excitement, an began to write out in detail what she had just witnessed.
"Celty! Welcome ho-" Shinra began, before being interrupted by Celty's screen in his face. [Izaya is dating a teenage boy, and he was naked in his apartment!] it read. Celty could not wait to hear his reaction to this, but was disappointed with his response:
"What, you didn't know?"
There was some silence before Celty typed out her puzzled reply.
[You knew?!]
"Ahhh yes, I've known for about a month now. Izaya has really outdone himself hasn't he?" Shinra said calmly. Celty begins typing frantically once again.
[You've known for this long and haven't done anything?!] If she had a face it would look appalled.
"I was waiting for him to have something I wanted. He would probably do anything to keep this under wraps. Even the most dangerous criminals have no tolerance for pedophilia." the doctor continued.
Celty went to sit on the couch, she seemed exhausted from the new information thrown at her. The dullahan began typing again, much less frantic than before. When she was done she showed her roommate what she wrote.
[Like the location of my head? I know it is in the city and if anyone knows where it is, it's Izaya]
"Hmm…" Shinra considered her proposition, "There's a chance this could actually work."
Both in agreement, they decided to pay Izaya a visit to discuss their business. Celty sent Izaya a message, warning him about her visit this time, if anything to spare Kida another awkward encounter. Izaya, having had time to prepare for their visit, let the doctor and his headless roommate into his apartment with confidence this time.
"What can I do for you two?"
Celty began typing on her phone but before she could finish her thoughts Shinra spoke.
"Give us the head, Izaya."
Izaya laughed, "What makes you think I know where Celty's head is?"
"Because you know exactly whose head I'm talking about."
Izaya's demeanor changed when he realized his mistake.
"Shinra, I know I'm the best information broker in all of Japan, however, I'm not that good." Izaya chuckled.
Shinra sighed. "Give us the head."
Izaya frowned, getting annoyed with the unpleasant interaction. "Look, I don't have the head"
Celty began to type in a reply, and the others paused to allow their friend to have a chance to speak. Celty showed Izaya what she had typed onto her phone.
[THE head? You mean MY head!] She was getting irritated with the inconsideration of the other two.
Shinra frantically apologized for disrespecting his not yet requited lover. Celty calmed down and turned to Izaya.
[Izaya, you'll give me my head or I'll send this photo to Shizuo.]
Celty showed Izaya a rather crude photo of himself and Kida Masaomi. He visibly winced at the screen.
"When did you take this? How did you pull that off?" He had lost his cool, this was unusual for the informant.
"How we obtained this information isn't important, all that matters is how we use it."
"You wouldn't dare." Izaya continued, getting more upset every second that passed.
"We would dare unless you give us… her head." Shinra made sure to emphasize that it was in fact Celty's head.
The resentful Orihara paused in deep thought. He weighed his options, does he call their bluff and risk compromising his relationship and reputation? Does he just give them what they want and cut his game short? He is less worried about dealing with Shizuo; the concern rests with the word of his love affair with Masaomi spreading to his clients. Izaya was fully aware that Heiwajima would spread that image like wildfire if he got his hands on it. Having made up his mind Izaya left the room. Shinra looked to Celty and shrugged his shoulders. The information broker returned carrying a cylindrical container, he handed it to the headless rider. Izaya began walking away
"Get out, and if that picture leaks I will make your existence hell."
Celty did not even process what the irritated informant had said, she was too entranced by what what inside the case in her hands. She felt an immediate connection, stronger than she had ever felt before. How could she have had been in this apartment days before and not sensed it was here? She knew Izaya would know where her head was located but she didn't ever imagine he was the one who was hiding it. Celty was so distracted by her head Shinra had to drag her out of the apartment.
