Quick Author's Note: While this is based on week two day three, I have taken creative liberties with not only the dialogue (and obviously character personalities and the...finer details of what happened) but also with the order of events. Whatever happened before whatever else. I. KNOW. So you don't have to tell me. :D But I still love you guys who'd care.

Warning: If you dislike odd fetishes, wet ramen, semen, possibly some form of pedophilia (I'm honestly not sure), gay love in its many forms, fangirlism, sex in not-quite-plain-sight, sex in general, and anything else that comes out of the average teenager's mind at around midnight

Disclaimer: Aren't YOU the lucky bastards! I actually, gasp, DON'T own TWEWY!

Another Day: Chronicles of Crack-Ramen

The bustling streets of Shibuya were filled with many people, as always. As always, they all seemed determined to get to wherever they were going. Except for, just as always, that select group of Shibuya teenyboppers that seemed to simply wander about, seeking out the next big trend. The current hip thing happened to be on Dogenzaka, and it was called Shadow Ramen.

The key to its success, of course, was a well-kept secret. Mostly because it was a scandal. The blogger idol, Eiji "The Prince" Oji, was trekking down his first romantic endeavor with none other than Shadow Ramen's own Makoto. As many of his readers knew, he had quite a thing for ramen. What none of them really knew, however, was how deep his passion for it truly went.

Eiji didn't just love good ramen. He truly, madly loved good, HARD ramen. Around his cock. Late at night. Alone.

However, of late, he'd found that while ramen could provide him with a good high and fantastic sex, it couldn't provide him with a good companionship. While he could love it all he wanted, while he could F it (to high heaven) as much as he could, it simply could not find it in itself to love him back; due in part to the fact that, after cumming all over it, it had to be sent to the sewers via his incredibly fashionable toilet.

Thus, he decided to pick up the next best thing. The people behind the wonderful ramen. And, as if answering his call like an angel from heaven (or perhaps a demon from hell), Makoto sought him out instead and asked him to strike a deal. Naturally, he set his conditions first and then agreed. Bringing us back to the current point.

The Prince was currently walking down the aforementioned street to visit not only his "favorite" ramen shop but also his favorite person. Walking down the street got enough of a reaction out of the crowd to create a small vibration in the waaves of people, but when he entered the eating establishment they went crazy. He did so love to see them fawning over his very existence. If only the ramen could do that. Immediately, his eyes found the one person he was looking for. His lover, Mick.

"Oh my GOD! It's the Prince! It's him! He really eats here!"

"He F'd this place on his blog! I can't wait to get my taste of that ramen!"

Smiling, he proceeded to the front of the line. Nobody protested, of course. They were all here because he was here, in the end. He was a sensation himself. He reveled in that as he walked up to Makoto, smiled and winked, and placed his order as smoothly as he could. He did love the man. After all, he WAS a ramen man.

"Prince! Babe! What'll it be today?" Mick casually asked. There were no undertones to it. He was strictly business. Advertising mode at the moment. Not even making sure that he heard the man he'd addressed correctly, he handed over a bowl as fast as he could so that the next customer could be served.

And, as they agreed, Eiji did his part. "Oh! F this ramen!" He would later. The F, to him, really didn't mean fantastic. It meant what you all were thinking it meant when you first heard the phrase. "This ramen is truly fabulous! I'll definitely be back here again!" he said enthusiastically, though honestly as he was barely tasting it he noted that not only did it most certainly NOT taste fantastic, it wasn't firm enough to be fucked well. Not really exceptional ramen in any aspect.

"He F'd it! He only F's the stuff he REALLY likes! Did you hear it1?"

"Glad to hear it! We look forward to your next visit!" Makoto said, waving slightly and adding in a wink of his own, though that was once again solely for business. However, he did retreat from the shop after the Prince himself had disappeared. He wasn't a master of discreet arts, but he did understand what Eiji'd meant when he'd made that vague gesture when leaving. First, of course, he needed to jostle the competition.

Down at Ken Doi's place, Makoto walked in to, surprisingly, actually find two young boys sitting down and eating. "Deserted as ever down here, I see," he said, keeping the confident and casual stance he always carried. Naturally, Ken immediately corrected him, stating that there were two fine young men eating ramen right in front of him, silently implying that he was a shithead that needed to have a cactus shoved right up his ass. Almost like something of a greeting by now.

Right before they got into a long, not-very-intriguing conversation about how to sell your ramen. And, oh, how he did know how to do that. It was waiting for him in the alleys behind Dogenzaka, as a matter of fact, and he honestly hadn't had good sex in a while. While he was doing his best to hide it, he was anxious and wanted to get back to what he was doing.

"Well, if that's all you have to say..." Without waiting for a response, he made his way back out of the ramen shop to meet his hot date. If it could be called that.

Leaving a very, very angry Ken Doi and two rather concerned young boys alone again. Letting out a sigh, the old man shook his head. "I wish people were more sensible..." he muttered, going back to preparing his ramen. For one reason or another, this earned a chuckle from Joshua.

Oh, great. What's the world's largest headache thinking up now? "Well, Neku? What say you we find out what exactly is going on here?" he said. Neku, as much as he hated to think it, didn't want to resist and put up no protest to it. "Whatever."

"Joshua, remind me how exactly we're supposed to get in when they keep bouncing us."

Said boy made a small noise, which Neku unfortunately read as slightly seductive at the time, as he drew his hand to his mouth in thought. "Well, the line's certainly not clearing up. Let's look around and see what we can find."

...Sweet Jesus, was that a lisp? Neku shook himself out of that thought. Joshua did not speak with a lisp, regardless of how stereotypically gay he was. He was too composed for that. He had his head on right, even if he was the most annoying piece of shit he'd ever met. Neku resolved himself to following the other boy as he made his way around the corner to something quite disturbing.

Neku actually gaped at the scene. At that time, he was simultaneously the gladdest and most disappointed that he couldn't be seen by the two people he and Joshua had stumbled upon. Oh, god, he would never be able to unsee it. He'd have nightmares for years. Joshua, meanwhile, seemed to be enjoying it on some level, even though his eyes had widened in shock. It was a nice reminder to Neku that he was still human and did feel things like a normal person. Even if it was this, he was glad that something had cracked through his hard gay shell.

Long, thin, and incredibly wet (with what was most certainly NOT water) noodles fell to the ground as Makoto zipped up his pants and Eiji stood up, wiping a few leftover noodles off of his face, as well as the tell-tale white of a sexual encounter. "Y'know, Eiji," even though you're a fucking weird ramen fetishist, "I'd really like to know just what you were thinking when you changed your blog entry."

"Mick..." Eiji frowned. "It's my blog."

"We have a contract, Prince. That text? It's limp." Kind of like the noodles that were on my cock not but a few seconds ago, come to think of it. "That won't sell me any noodles." Though you do give a good blowjob around them.

"If I'm writing what you say, though...Mick, to be honest, your ramen..." He'd given what was hopefully going to be the worst blowjob in his life. "It's not enjoyable. I...didn't really mean it when I F'd it." In more than one way.

"Eiji. Prince. Babe! What matters here is how the ramen sells, you understand? We've just got to advertise. That's all those people care about.," Makoto said, trying his best to desperately hold onto the boy in front of him. Even with a contract, they'd both wind up just breaking each side. He needed to think of something, fast.

"Mick...When I F ramen, I want it to be...fun. Enjoyable. Not like that. I'm sorry..."

Not listening to him, he continued with how he'd been going before. He didn't want to acknowledge that Eiji was breaking the contract. "Look, Prince. Just work with me here, all right? You're a sweet kid, you'll understand it. So you'll have this on your blog, right?" he said, quickly shoving a few papers into his hands before turning tail and running back to his ramen shop.

Eiji simply watched as his back shrunk and then ducked around the corner.

"Ah..." Joshua took a moment to recover from the shock of seeing Eiji Oji...giving oral sex to Makoto while he was wearing ramen on his dick. "Well...We know what's going on now, don't we, Neku?" he said, smirking.

Neku shook his head. "Look. There's Noise on him," he said, pointing.

"You're right. Well, then, you'll take care of it, won't you, Neku?" Joshua said, giving him a slight nudge forward.

"What the fuck, Josh!?" Neku said, shoving his heels into the ground as roughly as possible, causing him to fall backwards and take Joshua down with him. He couldn't hear it or see it, but he could definitely feel Joshua cracking up silently beneath him. Glad that the other boy couldn't see the red showing up on his face, he muttered, "I really hate you."

"I love you too, Neku," Joshua giggled, shoving the other boy off from on top of him. "Seriously, though, Neku. Let's do something about this. I'm sure we could find a fitting substitute for that failed lover and ramen chef back at the Ramen Don."

Great. Now they were playing matchmaker for an old man and a ramen fucker.

Depressed after the entire fiasco with Makoto, Eiji sulked down Dogenzaka. The ramen was disappointing, but Mick hadn't-...Well, that wasn't quite true, either. He'd wanted sex and love out of the contract, but really...His feelings were being messed with. Makoto was playing with his heart! "It's my feelings! It's...my blog, too! Where...where I list what I'm really thinking. And what ramen" and men "I'd really like to eat!" He let out a short sigh. "I missed the simple ramen that Sebastian used to make..." he muttered, slowing to a stop in front of a traditional ramen shop. Ramen Don? That sounded interesting. Maybe it would lift his spirits.

"...and that's why we think that'd sell better," Joshua finished. Neku honestly felt that it sounded more like a last-minute essay for English class. Especially with the whole thesis statement ending. Not that he knew what a thesis was.

Ken Doi crossed his arms in thought. "Okay! Yes, that's it!" he said, turning back to prepare that specific ramen.

Joshua chuckled, gazing sideways at Neku rather suggestively. Neku did his best to hide his blush without looking ridiculous. It failed both ways. "W-What!" he said, just wanting to get those eyes off of him. Joshua simply chuckled again in response.

Saved by the ramen. At that exactly moment, Ken slammed down the steaming hot bowling of ramen down in front of them. Which was the exact moment that Eiji Oji decided to poke into the shop. "Oh! Please! You have to let me try that ramen!" he said, practically diving for the bowl.

As he slurped down the ramen greeidly, Ken couldn't help but notice the slightly red tinge on his cheeks and think of how cute it was. And how borderline illegal. But mostly how cute. His ass was also conveniently high in the air, giving Ken a perfect view of that, too. He might be old, but dammit, that kid liked his ramen!...a little too much!?

"...What the hell are you doing!?" he asked, not quite disgusted but incredibly surprised at the spectacle unfolding before him. Taking a quick glance around, he noticed that the two boys from earlier seemed to have left the scene. It seemed like a wise decision, too.

Paying no attention to the old man's inquiry, Eiji proceeded to wrap the ramen around his cock and begin doing all sorts of unimaginable things with it. "OH! Oh, GOD! F this ramen! F IT TO HIGH HEAVEN!" he screamed, his voice cracking out of sheer ecstasy.

Ken took a moment, blinking back and gaping for a moment. Maybe...Maybe it was...a roundabout way of telling him that the ramen was really just that good? Oddly enough, it was turning him on. He made his way around the counter and behind the Prince of Ennui.

It was Eiji's turn to be confused. "Wha...What are...you doing..." he panted, near orgasm. Ken smirked, grabbing the boy's waist. "Only what you'll let me, baby..." he said seductively as he could. Which is to say, not at all, but at least he'd put forth the effort.

An effort which, apparently, was appreciated greatly by Eiji. He began to rub his ass against Ken's crotch, and fiddled around with his pants behind him with one hand whilst keeping the other firmly on the ramen. Ken took the bait immediately, dropping his pants and beginning to simply thrust into the boy with reckless abandon, both of them lost to the throes of ecstasy.

"Oh...oh god...I-I...I can FEEL...I can FEEL your love of ramen...your love of ramen LOVERS!" Eiji cried, doing his best to keep the ramen from slipping through his fingers at this point and failing miserably, instead opting to wrap his arms backwards around Ken's neck. "Oh, god...Oh, god!" he screamed.

Honestly, Makoto hadn't been expecting much when he'd walked in.

Har! Wouldn't he be surprised? Let's take a look and see what happens, shall we children?

Pulling back the curtain, Makoto walked into the shop. He'd heard screaming, but hadn't thought anything of it. He sort of wished he had. His eyes hadn't really been that open at all, but the second he laid eyes on the two people in the shop, his eyes took on the form of dinner plates. "Holy fucking sh...Fucking! FUCKING!" he stuttered, simply dumping out what his mind was generating and trying to make sense of the situation as quickly as he could.

Ohmyfuckinggod. Whatthehellwasthat. Thatwasn'tKEN.FuckingEIJI.WASIT. Ohfuckohfuck. Yeah, that's what it was. Fuck. Sweet Jesus (beam)! He immediately ducked back out of the ramen shop, slamming a hand over his chest and trying his best to calm himself down. Forget his broken contract. His conscience was scarred forever. Ramen...Good god, he'd never be able to look at it again. He wouldn't need the lack of a blog prince's help to shut down his store. After seeing that gruesome spectacle, he didn't WANT to own a ramen shop.

Neku and Joshua had been just outside of the ramen shop during the entire time. Neku smiled lightly, hearing the screaming coming from inside. "He makes good ramen," he said, completely and totally missing what the screams were really for. "It's done with love." More accurately, though, Eiji was done with love. "You have to fill more than just your belly." While a beautiful and true molologue, Neku had no idea what kind of truth he'd just spoken.

Joshua chuckled. Neku shot him a quick glare. "What!" he shouted for the umpteenth time that day. Chuckling again, Joshua slowly spelled out his answer. "You know what they're doing in there, don't you, Neku?" he asked, adding in a HEAVY undertone of what he knew what Neku had somehow managed to miss.

Unfortunately, Neku still managed to miss it. He decided that a subject change would suffice. "So, what were you trying to find out here, anyways?" he asked, curiously. Joshua had started the day by saying that he was searching for something, after all. It was natural to want to know what, exactly.

"Oh...That's right. Well, it's certainly nothing that I thought it was," he said. Ever vague and mysterious, of course. Neku scoffed at it. Typical Joshua. "But I do think that I've found it now. Right...here, perhaps? Yes, it's quite close, I'm certain," he said.

Neku raised a brow at his strange behavior, barely casting a glance back at the shop as Makoto charged in and immediately rushed back out looking like he'd had a heart attack.His brow rose up further. And by the time he'd turned around to Joshua, he noticed that he'd lost about three feet of personal space.

"What's the matter, Neku? You're not shy...are you?" he asked. "No, don't say anything. Your headphones tell me all I need to know," he muttered, stroking Neku's hair and slowly, gently knocking the pair of headphones back and off of the other boy's head.

Neku wasn't quite sure if he liked where this was going. "J-Joshua...what're you doing?" He asked nervously, quickly darting his eyes around in hopes of an easy escape route from whatever was slowly being forced upon him.

Joshua smirked, wrapping his arms possessively around the other boy. "Now, Neku...You're smarter than that. I think you know exactly what I'm doing," he purred, rubbing his head against Neku's. No, not that head, the one on the top of his body. They're not quite there yet, just hold on, dearies.

Neku tried to resist the urge to just give in to Joshua. He did NOT like the entire idea of what all was happening, especially when he felt two thumbs hook into his shorts. "Josh!" he shouted. "People...!" he hissed.

He chuckled. "Neku, Neku, Neku...You know they can't see us," he said, tugging harder on Neku's shorts, finding the rim of his boxers as well and giving them a final jerk down to the ground beneath them and eliciting a yelp from Neku. Since he was a pretentious asswipe, he of course laughed at that before proceeding to pull down his own pants and boxers.

Neku started to panic. Not that he was completely against what was happening, but he WAS against not being completely against what was happening. Knowing that telling Joshua to stop would be obviously useless (fat lotta good it had done him the past two minutes here) he decided to fall back on what he'd started off with. Scanning!

It was incredibly hard - both of them and the action about to be listed - to finally concentrate through Joshua's rather...tempting touches, but Neku found away around his hormones for a moment to actually figure out what the other boy was thinking. It shocked and amazed him.

He was first assulted with the normal ecstatic rush of someone initiating sex with a cute little companion. Nothing out of the ordinary. Then as he dug deeper into the other boy's thoughts, he began to see something truly disturbing. "JOSH! What the FUCK!" he shouted, unfortunately around that time he felt Josh come inside of him (probably due to his own bad timing of the shout) and then he followed.

So what had he found when he dug into the other boy's mind?

Thoughts of the current scene, only in Josh's ideal. Meaning, Neku was covered in blood and half-dead, Joshua was actually fucking him with something that looked remarkably like a paint-roller, Neku was in pain beyond belief, and Joshua was busy biting through the skin on his shoulder.

No matter what happened after that, Neku knew that there were only two options for that relationship. The first was to flip it around to where HE was on top. The second was to shave off a good bit of Josh's teeth, remove all weapons from the direct vicinity, and make sure that he was always jacked up on pain meds.

For the time being, he decided to sleep with his head resting quite comfortably on Joshua's chest. It really hadn't been that bad. "Joshua...if you do anything you just thought of, I'll fucking kill you."

"I love you too, dear."

breakbreakbreakbreakbreakC-C-COMBO BREAKER breakbreakbreak

Well. Do you people see what midnight does to me? Do you SEE it? Good, good. Though, honestly. Who wasn't thinking that Eiji was trying to fuck the ramen at first? There's not a one of you out there, I KNOW it.

Dude... Shes fuckin insane! Thats some random person who was over at my house and we started playing TWEWY and it was midnight and yeah... I could go on and on and on and on and on... But um... She wrote it and I tried to keep the events in order... Didnt work very well but I put forth the effort SO SCREW YOU FUCKERS!! .

(But you totally don't REALLY want to say something like that right after they read this, dude. D:)

(Screw you too! . I loves chu tho!)