This is a longer than originally intended one-shot from the perspective of everyone's favourite silent, large-breasted, bullpup assault rifle. I have long believed that despite her silence, there is an awful lot going on inside her head.
I've written this in an effort to try and get back into writing (this is just a warm-up, you might say) and it seems to have worked; though it may not be the same as my previous style or standard. This is also my first time writing in first-person.
I'm actually considering making a group of one-shots/short stories from Elle's perspective. Ideas are already floating around my head for some silly and (hopefully) amusing events, so it might happen if there is any interest.
Anyway, please enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. As always, all comments are appreciated.
EDIT: I've broken this up into three chapters (rather than one long one), to make it a bit easier to read.
Funco yawned widely. It was her way of greeting a rather typical morning; one that I felt was welcome after recent events that I am not going to bother recalling here, but suffice to say that they were not very restful.
"So what are we supposed to be doing today?" She asked; sitting opposite me on the floor and leaning against the lower bunk upon which was a pile of washing that was serving as her pillow.
"Long range shooting practice." Was Sig's response from her seat near the window; the only one of us sitting on a chair. Well, there are only two chairs in these dormitory rooms, one for each desk, so it wasn't that unnatural. The only way for all three of us to have a seat would probably be for Funco to sit in Sig's lap – something I'm sure that the Swiss girl would not object to.
"Phew." Was Funco's response and I agreed – a quick glance out of the window told me that it was still raining heavily. The string of unbearably hot days had passed and been replaced by low temperatures and unpredictable rain. It kind of reminded me of home. Of course, I wasn't particularly fond of long range shooting practice in any weather, but in this it would be difficult just to see the target never mind hit it.
My friends fell silent; Sig reading a book in German and Funco started picking at a loose thread on her sailor uniform. I turned my attention back down to the magazine that was open on the table before me. There were several others scattered across the table as well as around the room in general along with tissues, socks and other assorted rubbish. 'We should think about cleaning up.' I thought. Although most of the mess (and indeed possessions) in the room were not mine but Ichiroku's – even the fashion magazine I was currently half-reading had been borrowed – I would inevitably find myself putting more effort into cleaning than my roommate. Our American friend is only capable of short bursts of energy thanks to her lack of a full-auto fire mode.
Speaking of which, the only reason that the three of us were sat in silence is thanks to Ichiroku's absence – she was still washing herself when the rest of us left the bath and is yet to reappear. Having no motivation to head off to shooting practice in the rain, we found ourselves sitting idly in my and Ichiroku's room. What exactly we were planning to do I have no idea, but should Garand or the Modern Lit teacher find us skipping class then we'd faces a lot worse than shooting in the rain.
So, we continued in silence. Funco, having removed the offending thread was now hunched over the table trying to stack playing cards into towers without the long front bangs of her silver hair undoing her work. I – carefully, so as not to create an inconvenient breeze – turned over a few more pages of the magazine, admiring some of the colourful one-piece dresses on offer. Though I could never afford any of these without saving up for a very long time by which point there were new designs on offer, I still enjoyed just looking and dreaming what I would look like in such clothes. At this point a small sigh escaped my lips that, fortunately, went unnoticed by the other two who were somewhat preoccupied by their current activities. Sig seemed absorbed in her book and Funco was focused on attempting to raise her tower of cards to new and lofty heights; a focus that would soon be broken (along with the tower) by the arrival of the absent fourth member of our little squad.
"MORNING!" Ichiroku cried as she slammed the door to our room closed behind her and casually flicked her shoes off at the entrance. She ignored Funco's cry of protest from over the surviving tier of her card construction project and advanced quickly into the room, her arms wrapped around a bundle of letters and… two parcels. "Mail!" she curtly announced before carpet bombing everything on the low table. Funco's face fell as the survivors of the initial assault were obliterated and I did feel a little sorry for her, but… well, it was bound to happen.
"Look what just arrived." She said in a boastful tone and I looked up to see that one of the parcels had been spared from being used in an aerial bombardment. It was a long and narrow cardboard tube. I knew immediately what it contained.
"Oh, another movie poster is it?" Sig inquired, having paused her reading and placed down her book. I guess in would take serious concentration to keep reading after that entrance.
"Uh huh."
Did you really need to ask that, Sig? Ichiroku seemed to enjoy gathering posters for films that she featured in – all big-budget Hollywood productions. This one was apparently no exception as (after she had finished demolishing the packaging) Ichiroku unrolled the poster to unveil an image that was covered with explosions and rough-looking US Marines as well as the words 'The Pain Cabinet' written in large letters across the top. I didn't think much of the title.
"Ooh, looks exciting." Was Funco's opinion, having given up on her rescue operation and abandoned the casualties on the floor (more to clean up, thanks).
"Yeah it probably is!" was the response.
'You mean you haven't even seen it?' we all thought, though Funco was the only one to express it.
"Nope." Ichiroku answered proudly with a powerful grin on her face. She has so much allowance that she can throw it away on things like this. Where does she get it all from?
"Hmm… that figures." Sig commented. She'd been staring quite intently at the poster since it had first been revealed.
"What?"
"It explains…" Sig turned away slightly, returning to her book. "Why you've bought a poster with your sister on it."
As one our heads snapped round (the snap was almost audible) and our eyes refocused on the poster. It took a moment to verify, thanks to the aforementioned overdone explosions, but those soldiers were indeed holding Ichiroku's sister, M4A1.
"Aaaah!" Ichiroku cried out, her expression switching from pride to despair. "How did I not notice?"
'Well, you do look alike.' I thought, smiling broadly (it was taking some effort not to laugh) as Ichiroku melodramatically dropped to her knees, the poster crumpling on the floor.
"I was beginning to think you had a sister complex." Sig added casually; though, as usual, it was a carefully aimed remark.
"Oi!" Ichiroku was back on her feet, her face now configured in a dangerous scowl that was aimed directly at Sig.
"Now, now don't be mean Sig-chan… and Ichiroku-chan should calm down too." Funco, ever the peacekeeper, attempted to intervene. Though naturally it was hopeless; Ichiroku had just changed between pride, despair and anger so suddenly that you'd think somebody was playing with her fire selector. Now she was in her three-round burst mode in which she would rarely back down, usually caused trouble for everyone and (especially if her older sister Ichiyon was involved) often resulted in serious collateral damage. However, this time the two of them settled for simply sniping at each other (not literally, since Sig would win any such competition outright) whilst Funco tried to calm things down. I however decided not to listen to the exchange. My attention had just been caught by the other parcel that Ichiroku had brought, a shoebox-sized package wrapped in brown paper and covered in notices that indicated it had been sent from overseas. I pushed off the other letters (they were mostly junk anyway) and pulled it towards me to get a better look.
To: L85A1,
Seishou Academy Middle School Dormitory,
*******, *******, *******
For me? But I wasn't expecting anything and, in fact, I rarely get any post anyway. And then it hit me. I checked the postmarks (there was no return address) and sure enough it matched up. There is only one person I know who could have sent this. I felt my smile falter and part of me started wishing that we had all gone to our practice after all.
"Huh, is that parcel for you Elle-chan?" I heard Funco ask - it seemed my actions had not gone unnoticed. I just nodded. "Hmm… that's rare. Who's it from?" She added.
I shrugged; feigning ignorance. Even Sig and Ichiroku, having apparently grown tired of their bickering, were paying attention now. I could feel their gazes on me, but I didn't look up.
"Of course she won't know until she opens it Fu-ko." Ichiroku butted in with a condescending tone that Funco expressed her displeasure with.
"Are you going to open it, or are you just going to stare at it all day?" This time it was Sig.
Now I decided to look up, only to see that my instincts had been right and all three of my friends were staring right at me; the Swiss, who took a moment to brush back her untidy black hair (that had been long and straight until a certain impromptu haircut from a bullet); the Belgian, who just gave me a puzzled look in response; and the energetic American, whose curiosity shone like a flare from her bright blue eyes and often mischievous grin. I sighed. It looked like the three of them were more keen to know the contents of this box than I was (given the choice I'd rather bin it and forget about it) and wouldn't give up until it was opened. So, I took hold of the package again (having just noticed that my hands had been fidgeting with the hem of my skirt) and began to open it whilst being carefully observed by the others. Underneath the brown paper there was indeed a shoe box and inside the box…
"A photo album?" Funco said as I carefully lifted the large book out of its shredded newspaper cradle and placed it on the low table. I must admit, it wasn't quite what I had been expecting either. "Is there anything in it?"
"Let's find out!" Ichiroku exclaimed and, before I could react, she snatched the album from me and opened it at a random page.
Blank.
"And again!" She flicked a few pages back and this time struck photographs. "Hey, they're all of us." She commented, and indeed they were. These pages were predominantly photos of Japan, Seishou Academy and the four of us with occasional appearances from Ichihachi, the three high school girls (there was one of Funco's sister, Fal, looking particularly beautiful) and others. Funco and Sig immediately crowded round the album on the corner of the table and the three of them poured over the images in detail, raising comments of "I don't remember this, where was this?"; "Funco-chan looks so cute in this one."; "This was before the new teacher started here." and "I'll have to get copies of these.".
It was somewhat nostalgic looking back over these snapshots of the past as most of them represented some good memories (including one of myself and Ichiroku caked in mud after having won the team tournament). I had very much enjoyed coming to Japan and this school. It had all been so new and I was very nervous, but had managed to make some good friends and have some good experiences. However, part of my mind was still wondering exactly why I had been sent this.
"Hey, I don't recognise these." I heard Funco say, interrupting my thoughts.
"Yeah, they've only got Elle and Ichiroku in them…" Sig added, though it was the next part that really got my attention, "… and a camel!?"
I peered over from my side of the table and saw that the three of them had managed to go far enough back in time to reach a point considerably before I had come to Seishou. I did recognise the pictures though and their presence did confirm the suspicion I'd had from the beginning – this album was all about me and my life (no matter how many adorable pictures there are of Funco in there, Sig). That answered one question, but not all of them. These pictures should all be back in Britain, hidden deep in a corner of my old room in a shoebo… Oh.
A quick check. Yes, that one.
"Oh, I remember this." Ichiroku said, as though it had just dawned on her. "This was when me and Elle first met. It was in the desert, years and years ago. Do you remember Elle?"
Yes I do, I nodded. How could I forget? I was sitting just outside the base perimeter, playing with the soft sand and sheltering from the fierce sun under my umbrella. I had been rather enjoying the peace and quiet (but not the scorching temperatures) when a large contingent of Americans arrived along with Ichiroku. Since I hadn't met that many foreign assault rifles at the time, I was quite curious. After introducing ourselves we had quite an eventful time together.
"Yeah, when we met Elle was playing in the sand. It looked like fun so I decided to join in."
Yes, you did. We narrowly avoided both being clogged with sand.
"We made this great big sandcastle." She stretched her arms out by way of demonstration, drawing an appreciative 'Oooh' from Funco. "It had a keep, walls, towers, a moat and everything!"
Erm… I thought I did that. I seem to remember you being no help at all.
"It was amazing. It's a shame we couldn't get a picture of it since it got knocked over."
You shot it.
"Completely destroyed." She sighed.
You shot it a lot. You put thirty rounds into it.
"So you two knew each other before you came to Seishou?" Sig inquired.
"Yeah, but not for very long what with the war and all." Ichiroku settled back down onto the floor after her animated miming of the construction (and destruction) of a sandcastle. Sig just hummed in response and they returned their attention to the album, flipping further back through time.
Thinking about it, I guess the fact that we had previously met may have influenced the room allocation here. Though I'd never considered it before, I did briefly wonder if I would have become friends with Sig and Funco had I been placed in a different room with one of the other girls. Had that been the case I could easily have had a different group of friends and we would've spent our time doing different things (rather than skipping classes). I might've ended up with Sar or Hachihachi, Tei, Cal or even Aug. It's hard to say whether that would've been better or not.
"Hey, Elle! Who's this?" My de facto roommate called, once again interrupting my thoughts, and I found the photo album shoved in my face, stopping just millimetres from the end of my nose. I was present with a page of photos from much earlier in my life, photos I had been expecting (or perhaps dreading) from the beginning, and they all contained the same two people; me and…
"My sister." I said quietly.
"Sister!?" Ichiroku exclaimed, pulling the album back away from my nose. "You have a sister?"
"I never knew." Funco commented.
"Me neither." Sig added.
Hardly surprising since I'd never mentioned her before; in fact I hadn't seen my sister or even heard from her for years now. But the three of them still sat there staring at me, their faces forming a good reference chart for different levels of surprise; from Ichiroku's wide-eyed, open-mouthed astonishment, through Funco's hands raised to face in disbelief, to Sig's much more subtle raised eyebrows of mild unexpectedness. All this was making me feel rather uncomfortable - and not just from everyone's attention - the conversation was moving towards a topic that I would rather avoid. There's a reason I've never mentioned my sister before, it always brings up unpleasant memories.
The other three turned to look at each other briefly before focusing once more on every detail of the photos. "You should've known." Sig's comment was aimed at Ichiroku. "After all, they look so much alike."
That's true. My sister is a bit taller than me and has longer hair that she usually ties back into a plait or ponytail, since she has a much longer and heavier barrel than me (much longer, in fact, than anyone in this room but she still manages to be shorter than Ichiroku). Other than that, however, we're pretty much identical.
"Yeah, but Elle's sister has bigger boobs!" Ichiroku shot back.
Yes… Well, she is a light machinegun after all.
"Even bigger than Elle-chan's… I wonder how much she weighs." Funco added her thoughts on the matter, and I thought I might have noticed a bit of jealousy in her voice. Though the comment was rather unwanted all the same; every time the conversation moves in this direction our American friend starts acting like a perverted old man and I'm sure I could feel her eyes already flicking across to my chest.
"Hey, Elle…" She began.
Here it comes.
"…What's your sister's name?"
"L86A2." I answered truthfully, and then inwardly cursed myself. Because of the unexpected question, I had slipped up and added the 'A2' part of her name.
"Huh? A2?" Sig, sharp as ever, had picked up on it, "But you're an A1 aren't you?"