Title: The Swear Jar Chapter 1
Author: Romantique
Email: dolph1n
Classification: Raylan/Winona Family/General
Rating: T for language (but no worse than the show)
Summary: Raylan is a new dad. This one is a stand-alone, not a sequel to 'A Change of Scenery.'
Disclaimer: It's 'Justified' hiatus time, and I'm bored. This fic is based on nothing but my imagination and takes place sometime after the end of Season 3.
Legal: These characters do not belong to me. I'm just a fan and have not made a dime. Please email me to obtain permission to post.
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Gayle's House
"You know how much I hate to ask you to do this," Winona whined, out of breath and out of patience. She handed Raylan the baby, "But shit, I have to go."
"You owe a dollar to the Swear Jar," Raylan informed her, trying to contain his delight, as he carefully took his sleeping infant daughter into his arms.
He was typically the one who was called out for his colorful language. Indeed, he had already made a sizable contribution to the Swear Jar ... enough to make a dent in his daughter's college fund, the intended use of the jar's contents.
"You don't need to worry. We're gonna be fine," he said in a calm, reassuring voice. "And besides, she mostly sleeps."
As if Raylan had flipped a switch, Winona vehemently began to shake her head.
"This isn't going to work." And she reached out to take the babe back.
Somewhat offended, Raylan flashed her a pained look. His response was to turn on his heel, so that the baby was well out of Winona's reach. "What did I do?"
Winona suddenly looked like she wanted to cry.
"No, Raylan, she doesn't just sleep," she explained. "There is much more to taking care of an infant than that. You're much too casual about the whole thing."
Winona Hawkins was no more hormonal than the average new mother, but leaving her little one for the very first time was truly taking its toll.
"I've kept her before," Raylan continued to speak in a quiet, low voice. "You said I did just fine."
"Well, you did," she acquiesced. "I was nearby ... and Gayle was around. But now, ..."
She nervously raked her fingers through her hair. Winona was referring to the fact that Gayle was on vacation, in Yellowstone, with her husband and kids. Raylan agreed to watch the baby at Gayle's house and not in his room over the bar. They all agreed his place was no place for a baby.
In a huff, she suddenly asked while pacing, "Hell, what are you going to do if she's too warm in the middle of the night?"
As much as Raylan wanted to tell Winona to put another buck in the Swear Jar, he thought it best not to mention it just now. Instead, he very calmly answered, "I'd cool her off with a wet cloth. If that didn't work pretty fast, we'd get in my car and drive to the Emergency Room." He looked at her with raised eyebrows, awaiting her response. "I'd get us there faster than an ambulance."
Hanging onto his every word, she nodded.
"Good answer." Then, she paused, deep in thought. "Okay, what would you do if Art called and told you he needed you, right away?"
"I'm scheduled off, takin' care of my baby," Raylan answered in the same, even tone. "And I'd tell him he needs to call in someone else. I'm not the only marshal in Lexington."
Her mind was still racing, as she continued pacing the floor. She next asked, "What would you do if you run out of breast milk?" Then, under her breath, she said, "Although I don't know how you could. I've been pumping extra for more than a week." Trying not to sound like a total nut job, after a beat, she explained, "I mean, what if the power goes out, and you can't keep the milk cold? And it all goes bad? And the baby doesn't have anything to eat?"
"I'd go to the Mini Mart and buy some ice and put it in a cooler," he said without missing a beat. "But if she needed you ... or if you needed her? I'd bring her to you."
"You would bring her to me?" she asked, touched by what he said.
Raylan took in a deep breath and exhaled. "We could all go to Bowlin' Green? Then, that way, you could see her at night," he offered. After a beat, he continued, "You do know there's no rush for you to go back to work. Right? If you want to put this seminar off altogether, or stay home with her for a while. Be a mom. You're free to do whatever you want. No pressure."
"You would do that, wouldn't you?" she smiled. "Go to the seminar with me."
"You know I would," he smiled his most charming Raylan smile.
Although they weren't a couple anymore, they were raising a child together. And at times, Winona was reminded that she loved him so much ... at times like this. And it scared her.
She smiled back at him. All the stress in her face dissipated.
A sighed escaped her. "I need to do this," she said, more to herself than to him. "I need the Continuing Ed credits, and this is the easiest way to keep up my certification. I don't know when I'll go back to work, but whenever I do ... I'll be ready."
This was Winona's way of maintaining control. It would be too easy to cave and let Raylan take care of her. But that would mean relinquishing control over to him, and that was something she was not willing to do.
Raylan leaned down and kissed Winona on the top of the head.
"Well, the offer's there," he said. "Should you change your mind? You're only three hours away."
She gave his arm a squeeze.
"Thank you," she said, "for understanding."
"You're welcome," he said.
And he watched Winona walk out the door and leave him alone, for four days, with Miss Caitlyn Grace.
Several hours later ...
The day had been easy. Taking care of Cait was a piece of cake. Raylan couldn't help but think that his calm, relaxed style made for a calm, relaxed baby. Not that he was knocking Winona, but she had been wound up a little tighter than usual since the baby was born.
He fed the babe and changed her diaper a couple of times. Now two-months-old, Cait was able to stay awake for longer and longer periods of time. He noticed her neck muscles were getting stronger and stronger. And in her flailing, she was now reaching up as if to grab his hand.
The highlight of his day was when he was on the receiving end of a beautiful toothless grin. This was a first for him. He smiled back at her.
"Did you just do what I think you did?" he asked, thinking maybe it was just gas.
That's what he'd been told by Winona and her sister for the past month ... that all her little 'smiles' were nothing more than a little gas.
Then, she did it again.
"Awww. Bull. That's not gas, is it Cait?" he smiled back at her. "And don't tell your momma I said 'bull.' I'm fresh out of ones, and I could have said a lot worse. I'm tryin' to do better."
Sitting in the recliner with his knees bent up, the baby was cradled upright on his thighs. He offered a finger to Cait's hand, and she grasped it. And then, she smiled at him, again.
"You know you're meltin' your daddy's heart, don't you?" he confided. "Is that your super power? I think you get that from me. I have ninja skills, and you have a smile that can melt the hearts of mortal men."
And again, baby Cait gave her daddy a big smile.
Raylan took a good look at her. She was tall for a baby, in the 75th percentile on height. She certainly didn't get that from her petite momma. And her hair was blonde. He had blond hair until he was a teenager, and then, it turned dark. Winona decided Caitlyn had his hair and his height, but she definitely had her momma's face and her big blue eyes. Winona warned him that her eyes may change color, but he didn't think they would.
"Yeah, you're pretty, just like your momma," he said. "Boy am in trouble."
He was referring to chasing away the boys in the future. His concern was met with a little yawn.
"How would you like to watch your first Wild Cat game with your old dad?" he asked, as he reached over to grab the remote control from the end table. "As a child of mine, you will root for the Blue and White of the U of Kentucky. Yay."
And he shook his index finger, with her tiny fingers still wrapped around it, as if he was helping her shake a pom pom. She yawned again. Then, he picked her up and laid her down, tummy side down, on top of his chest. He kissed her soft head that smelled of baby shampoo, and he gently rubbed her back with his fingertips. Her little body rose and fell with his chest, each time he inhaled, exhaled. After a time, his breathing was in a steady rhythm. She was snuggled up, close to her daddy's heartbeat. And in no time, Cait was fast asleep.
Raylan Givens was as content as he had been in quite some time. Off from work, he was watching a Wild Cats game with his new 'best girl' fast asleep on his chest. He was in love with his little girl. In the short time since she entered the world, she had changed his life. Suddenly, he had a new reason to get up in the morning, something new to work towards. It was his job to take care of her, to protect her, to love her. It was a job he relished. She brought her parents to a place where they had to get along and work together. He didn't worry about Winona picking up and disappearing again. She swore to him she would never leave with Caitlyn. Even Gayle made a point to assure him that Winona was not going anywhere. The sisters had a long talk about how the baby needed both her parents; it was her birthright to have both her mother and her father in her life.
Suddenly, the cell phone on the end table was buzzing. Raylan picked it up and looked at the screen.
"Hey," Raylan smiled, speaking softly so as not to wake Cait. "How's it goin'? Are you all checked in?"
"I'm down here in the restaurant having a second beer with a fish taco," Winona happily reported.
Drinking was not something she could easily do while breast feeding or pumping, not without timing it out just so. Tonight, she could just relax and think only of herself.
"Good for you," he said. "Cait and I are watchin' a Wild Cats game."
"Yeah, the game's on here, too," she reported, as she looked up at the big screen. "Is she being good for you?"
"She's a doll," he reported. "I've been keepin' her fed and dry and loved."
"Are you telling her stories?" she asked in a light tone. "I know you are because that's what you do. Promise me you won't tell her the gruesome ones."
"I promise," he said. "I save the gruesome ones for you and you alone."
"Gee, thanks," she laughed.
"How are you doin', Winona?" he asked with great sincerity.
She shifted her weight further into the booth.
"I'm tired," she said. "As much as I love my baby girl, and you know I do ... I'm wiped out. I'm going to eat some dinner and go back to my room. It's only 7:30, and I'm ready for bed."
"You could use some 'you time,' he concurred. "Just relax after your classes. Take it easy and take care of yourself. Go get a massage or have your nails done. Do it on me," he offered. "You deserve to pamper yourself a little."
"Thank you," she said, sounding very touched. "I might take you up on that."
"I wish you would," he said in all sincerity.
"Well, I'm gonna let you go," she said. "Call me if you need anything, okay?"
"I will," he promised. "You know you can do the same. Call me tomorrow night. G'night, Winona."
After he disconnected the call, he went back to quietly watching the game, although he dozed off sometime during the 3rd quarter. He was awakened sometime later by a tiny little whimper. He glanced at his watch. It was almost 3 a.m. He picked up Cait and carried her into Winona's bedroom where he changed her wet diaper. Then, he carried her into the kitchen, heated up a bottle, and took her back into the bedroom where he fed her. Her eyes were heavy while she was feeding. After she finished the few ounces of milk, Raylan threw a cloth diaper over his shoulder and patted her back until she burped.
She was ready to go back to sleep, and he placed her in the bassinette next to the bed. Then, he crawled into bed and dimmed the light. Father and daughter were both out in about 30 seconds flat.
(To be continued ...)