A/N: So, I think this is funny. Now, if you're colorblind, please don't be offended by this. I don't think it would be, but I'm actually making fun of myself here. I'm actually afraid of being colorblind. (I'm not colorblind.)
Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush. I'm still in school, just like the TV told me to do.
"Sharks Are Colorblind"
Lucy has always had a strange fear of having color vision deficiency. It wasn't something she was even able to laugh about, it truly scared her. Normally she could laugh at herself for being afraid of ghosts when something weird happened. She was afraid at first of going on a roller coaster, but once she rode on one, the phobia went away. Now she can joke about it. Not with this fear. She's actually been able to hide it from others, but it has never gone away.
One day in late July, she was watching a special episode of sharks, during Shark Week. She enjoyed learning about the silent killers, and freaking other people out with statistics of shark attacks once she hears them. She especially loved doing this to her boyfriend, Logan. He told her that soon, he would get back at her, by scaring her. Lucy didn't think that was possible. Logan simply did not have a scary fear-ture (see what she did there?) about him.
One episode she was watching was about a tiger shark, who had disappeared mysteriously, and the shark specialist (who named her Delores) thought that she was eaten by a great white. Turns out, she just lost the tracker that had been attached to her fin just fell off, and then a great white ate it. Lucy enjoyed watching the episode but wished the coloring was clearer. The water was murky, and Lucy couldn't see the beauty that was her favorite type of shark: the tiger shark.
Then, she started to feel self-conscious. What if the murky water was perfectly clear, and Lucy was developing color vision deficiency? 'No, that's impossible. You're born with it, you can't develop it unless something damaged my brain, or something.'
"Hey, Lucy, can I hide here for a while? Carlos wanted to play hide and seek, and the rules are, we have to stay in the apartment. I decided to make the game very long," Logan grinned, plopping down on the couch beside his girlfriend. She laughed.
"Where are James and Kendall?" she asked.
"Oh, they aren't that smart. They're hiding behind the swirly slide." She laughed once again, and then they turned their attention to the show.
Before the end of the next shark show, Lucy had put her head on Logan's shoulder, and he was running his fingers through her hair. The pure calmness of the action, with the combined feeling of euphoria that she got when someone played with her hair, had Lucy nearly falling asleep. She was about to close her eyes when Logan spoke.
"Your purple highlights are beautiful." That snapped Lucy right out of her haze. She had red highlights, not purple. Now, this could only mean one of two things…
"Logan, my highlights are red. Not purple." She looked up at him to see his facial response. He looked unconvinced.
"Lucy, they look purple, they are purple," he tried. She shook her head frantically, her hair swishing back and forth.
"No, it says 'red' on my hair dye. Trust me," she insisted. She grabbed his wrist and dragged him to her bathroom. She grabbed the bottle of hair dye, and held it up to his face, her finger directly under the name of the color. It did, as a matter of fact, say red. His eyebrows knit in confusion.
"Then why does it look purple to me?" he asked, somewhat fearfully. Lucy's eyes got big and wide. Then, feeling doubtful, she got an idea.
"Come on. Let's do something on my laptop. That will help us figure out what's going on." She had a color-blindness test bookmarked on her computer, simply to reassure herself from time to time.
"Okay, we're just going to take a test okay?" she told him as they sat down on the couch once again. She grabbed the laptop from her coffee table and brought it to her lap.
"Okay. What number do you see?" Lucy asked, indicating to the circle of dots with orange dots forming a sixteen. Logan nodded when he said an answer.
"Sixteen." That didn't really say anything, the first slide was supposed to be seen by everyone.
"Okay…this one?" Logan squinted at the screen.
"I don't see anything," he confessed. Lucy started to panic internally, but stayed calm on the outside.
"The third one?" 'Please let him see a five on this one,' Lucy thought. He was squinting again.
"I still don't see anything. Is that a good thing?" he questioned, looking nervous. She gave him a smile.
"I don't know. Let's get to the end. Do you see anything on this one?" It was the number forty-two.
"No." Lucy's heart was ready to pound right out of her chest. Her boyfriend was colorblind! The one thing that Lucy feared was happening to her boyfriend.
"What do you see here?" she whispered, afraid that if she spoke any louder, her voice would be shaky.
"Nothing." There was a seven there, actually.
"Alright, this is the last one," she informed him. He nodded his head quickly.
"Okay, I see a seventy," he answered with conviction. She sighed, and her shoulders slumped in defeat.
"It's a twenty-nine," she mumbled. He leaned in.
"What?" he checked. She stood up, just about exploding.
"It was a twenty-nine!" she shouted. "You're color vision deficient! You got them all wrong! Yeah, you saw the sixteen, but everyone was supposed to! My boyfriend is colorblind," she cried. Her head dropped and Logan stood up so he could wrap his arms around her.
"It's fine, Lucy. It doesn't matter whether I'm colorblind or not," he spoke quietly in her ear. Lucy squeezed her eyes shut. Two tears had already escaped.
"I should have known it was possible. Only half of a percent of women have colorblindness, but up to twelve percent of males have it!" she whimpered. Logan chuckled.
"Well, on the bright side, you sound really sexy saying those statistics," he told her. She smiled, and they pulled back from their "hug."
"Really?" she whimpered.
"Yeah, you do," he whispered. Lucy hugged him again, smiling. Then, he started to laugh. Lucy ignored it until the sound got louder, and he was shaking. She pushed him back with a skeptical expression.
"What are you laughing at?" she demanded. He kept laughing, trying to get it under control.
"You are so scared of being colorblind! It was so funny!" he wheezed. She stared at him for a second, baffled, then she realized it, and her mouth formed an angry 'O'.
"I can't believe you! You took my fear, and you practically tortured me! You are so despicable! How did you even know?" she screamed at him. He just kept guffawing.
"The-the an-swers were, two, five, forty-two, seven, and yeah, twenty-nine. Oh man, this is great! The hair dye beginning was genius. I'll have to thank Kendall for that. As for how I knew, well I had noticed that the test was a bookmark, so I kind of figured," he said, wiping tears of laughter away. His laughter had died off as he spoke.
So he didn't come up with this on his own. There were others involved. Oh, the betrayal! She glared at him.
"I hate you," she spoke simply, crossing her arms over her chest. He just kept smiling. Him and his stupid vampire bat lips! He wasn't even a great kisser! (That was a lie, and she knew it.)
"No you don't. Now come on, and let's go watch more Shark Week," he pulled at her wrist, and she reluctantly followed. Wait a minute.
"Was this your revenge?" she inquired. He laughed again and nodded. They sat down, and after staring at him for a moment, she began to smile. Her boyfriend was fantastic at getting back at people. That could come in handy.
"Alright, you're wonderful. I forgive you. My tiger shark razor teeth won't bite you and leave you to bleed out," she gave in. They resumed the position they were in before the trick had begun.
"You know, since you like sharks so much, I started to study them a little bit. I gotta say, I kind of like nurse sharks," he informed her. She smiled, and nodded, not taking her eyes off the screen.
"Yeah, you would, Doctor. Did you know, however, that the small sluggish ones are the stupid ones? You're stupid," she joked.
She totally knew that he had a fear of being stupid. He knew that she knew. It didn't faze him.
"You know sharks are colorblind, right?" Yeah, he won.
A/N: Yeah, Logan. I love this. I just thought this would make a good one-shot. If you agree, let me know! Again, no offense to those who are colorblind, I'm just afraid of being so. Besides, my science teacher is colorblind, and she's awesome! I love her!
~RosesAreForWriters