A/N: Well well well, it's been a while hasn't it? I doubt anyone remembers me... I haven't written in ages, and didn't think I was going to, but the summer came round, and thus so did boredom and an urge to annoy people by putting these terribly crap stories on this site. Anyways, enough of me being me, and more of me writing! Oh, one thing, don't read this if you don't like crudeness, humour or my feeble attempts at it) randomness, or me (I bet a lot of people just turned off their computers.)
CHAPTER ONE: THE NEW GUY
This was the first response of the young man who had just taken his first glance at was to be his new farm and only source of income for a trial of 3 years.
"Come now, it isn't really that bad… is it?"
The young man stared at the overweight red-nosed Mayor for a second in disbelief.
"You're kidding me."
"Oh come now, it may need a touch of paint here and there…"
"A touch of paint? It's a dilapidated load of shit!"
The young man looked around at the weed-ridden, funky-smelling field in which he was soon supposed to grow bountiful crops and grass fields. He turned to face the shack in which he was soon supposed to live, almost swearing he could see some strange man dressed in yellow sliding some of the very valuable volumes of Shakespeare off the bookshelf and into his coat.
"Come now Jack, it really isn't that bad. I mean, sure, it isn't exactly some fancy mansion, and I'm not trying to say it's a castle or anything, but… well… at least it's a standing form of shelter!"
The Mayor was soon corrected by a terrible creaking sound coming from the old house. A small bird had perched itself on the roof. After a second the bird took to do its business, it took flight, pushing down slightly on the roof as it did so. A very brief moment later came the horrible sound of Jack's would be house imploding.
The two just stood and stared as the building was brought crashing down loudly to the ground.
"M…my grandfather's house… gone… all gone…"
Jack stood there, mouth gaping open, eye twitching.
"Ah… how about we take a tour of the town now?"
The Mayor led Jack, whose eye was still twitching at the sight of his beloved grandfather's house's destruction, out of the farm and towards the town.
A moment later, a man in what appeared to be some sort of raincoat and a peculiar rainbow coloured hat clawed his way out of the wreckage, and after taking a moment to brush himself off, also headed out of the farm.
"Meet Popuri!"
The girl who stood in front of Jack and flowing pink hair, strange red eyes and a youthful look about her.
"Well howdy Jack! It sure is nice to meet you!"
The girl took Jack's hand and shook it warmly.
"Grandpapa… gone… all gone… oh what? Umm… Hi. I'm Jack."
The girl continued to shake his hand. The boy tried to withdraw his hand, but the girl hung on tight.
"Could you uh… could you please let go of my hand now?"
The girl didn't seem to here him, and continued to shake his hand.
Another pink haired woman, a bit older this time, emerged from the building behind them.
"Sorry about this. Sometimes you just have to…"
The woman revealed a broom she was holding behind her back, with which she then hit the girl over the head. The girl's eyes widened for a second, her face otherwise expressionless, and her hands fell to her sides. After a second a wide smile suddenly appeared on her face.
Jack looked at her in disbelief, waving his hand in front of her face for a second. The mayor looked at him worriedly.
"Uh, you might want to be careful." His voice dropped to a whisper. "She's been known to bite." Jack quickly withdrew his hand.
"Umm… is she… I mean… is she… does she…"
The Mayor seemed to understand what Jack was trying to say, as if he'd been asked the question many times before.
"No, she isn't special needs, she's just… Popuri…"
"Just Popuri?"
"You'll come to understand in time… oh, by the way, this is Lillia, Popuri's mother."
The mayor gestured towards the woman with the broom, who spoke for the second time.
"Well boys, as much as I'd love for you to stay for some egg juice" (at this point Jack's eyes widened as he felt his breakfast working its way up his throat)" I really must ask you to leave. It's time for Popuri to take her afternoon nap."
The mayor nodded knowingly, and led Jack out of the farm. The girl stood there still, standing with that blank smile on her face. Lillia sighed and led her seemingly ever-smiling daughter back into their house.
A/N: Well, I didn't want to ramble on too long, because I don't think this is much good, so all I'll say is please, if you don't like his, I beg of you, tell me what I've done wrong, so maybe I can improve my writing and at least won't be writing stuff that people hate like poison.