MBP: I'm alive! So, I was roleplaying Mana on tumblr, and one of my friends made me start shipping Apprenticeshipping, but I'm still a Vaseshipper, so... this lovely thing showed up. Literally. I woke up and the first paragraph kept running through my head.
Rini: Hee hee! You're welcome everyone! We own nothing!
Never His
She was never his. Never his to protect, never his to hold, never his to love... She was never anything more to him than his student, could never be anything more.
Except there were moments his heart had betrayed him, and he'd thought… maybe. Maybe there could be more in those moments she willingly came to him with a spell she'd deemed interesting enough to want to learn. Maybe there was something different in her eyes when they were together. Maybe this time, he'd say something to her about why he wanted her to learn certain things, instead of scolding her.
But maybes were dangerous. They threatened everything he'd worked for. Not his position in life, but his friendship with the Pharaoh, and the relationship he had with his student already. So Mahaad kept quiet, remained the dutiful priest, the persistent teacher…
But now, having to watch as Mana and Atem began the ritual to become one, his treacherous heart ached. Having to pretend all was fine as the two he cared for most in this world joined together, as Mana became his Pharaoh's wife…
He had prepared for this, or believed he had. Mana had always been the one closest to Atem. Always, even as children when they ran around the palace to wreak havoc, and hide in those vases, Mana had adored the boy. This was predictable, their falling in love and becoming man and wife.
And still, everything inside screamed that this was wrong. Atem didn't love Mana; he might believe he did, but the Pharaoh had no close female friends aside from the apprentice. What did he know of love, the kind that made your heart race? The kind that made you feel more than joy, but pain, and made you more selfless –and selfish- than you had been before?
All Mahaad wanted was to scream, to put an end to this. To pull his apprentice…no, to pull Mana away, into his arms, and let her know she was the most important thing in the world. More than his position, his powers, or anything that could be offered… She was what mattered. Her smile which could bring him out of his worst moods, the glee in her eyes when she mastered something particularly difficult…
But it was joy on her face he saw now, the wonder of a love that had brought her both tears and happiness returned, and he clamped those urges down, swearing to himself that he would never hint at their existence. Never let anyone see how much he cared for her, how much he needed her in his life, even as nothing more than a student.
No, Mana was never his. Never his to protect, but he made sure she would never be hurt. Never his to hold, though he did –just this last time- as she came over to him with that bright smile that caused him both pain and joy.
And never his to love, though he was sure he would never stop.
MBP: This hurts my newly born Apprenticeshipping heart... T.T
Rini: You guys know the drill! Please let us know what you think! Thanks so much for reading!