Inspired
by several comments made throughout Eclipse, this is a story
about Elizabeth Masen's ring. The first part is set in the Pretwilight era,
circa 1931, just after Edward returned home from his rebellious period. The
second part is set during the middle of Eclipse, taken
directly from Chapter 20, pages 457 – 460.
It's beautiful! She glanced at me curiously, apprehension shadowing her expressive eyes.
Her thoughts made me smile. She liked it; that would make getting her to accept it much easier. Glancing at the ring held between my thumb and forefinger, I grinned. It was indeed beautiful. The delicate, narrow band of gold created a thin web around the slanting rows of glittering stones set on a long oval face.
Of all the things I had inherited from my mother, this ring was the most significant. It would forever remind me of the love my parents had for one another, their commitment to each other and to our family. A love now reflected in the eyes of the woman before me. I held it out, willing her to take it.
Why are you offering me this ring? Her thoughts immediately registered puzzlement before turning to rejection.
Quickly schooling the disappointment in my face, I turned to the man next to her. Although his features were impassive, his thoughts betrayed his inner turmoil. How could you think that we would take something so important to you? This really isn't necessary.
"We can't accept your mother's engagement ring, Edward," Esme said sadly, not wishing to hurt my feelings. Her thoughts were torn between wanting to accept the beautiful gift that meant so much to me and yet not wanting to take something that had held such a special meaning in my human life.
"Why not?" I objected stubbornly. I wanted them to have the ring; not only was it the most precious gift I had to offer, but it would also help to affirm my commitment to our newly reformed family.
"Because," answered Carlisle, a smile gracing his features, "you don't have to make this kind of a sacrifice in order to prove your feelings for us, or to show your remorse over what is now in the past."
I flinched at his words. He did not mean to cause me pain with them. However, it was not as if I could easily escape the consequences of my actions in the last few years. The knowledge that I had taken human lives, no matter how justified I felt at the time, continued to haunt me relentlessly, despite my acts of retribution in the past few months. Whether or not we had souls, as Carlisle believed we did, was still debatable in my mind, but if I did have one, my actions would have invariably blackened it. The feelings of remorse, guilt, and sorrow had been uppermost in my thoughts for months. They may pass with time, but I would never forgive myself for straying from everything Carlisle had taught me. My rebelliousness had caused such turmoil for both my new family and me; I wondered how they had ever found it in their hearts to forgive me when I could not forgive myself. Was I truly worth the compassion and love they had shown me since my return?
Carlisle's thoughts quietly broke through my anguish, disrupting the onslaught of despair and self-pity, as he looked at me with eyes full of sympathy and understanding.
You are forgiven Edward. Let the past be the past. It saddened us when you left to find your own way, but I realize now that you needed to branch out and grow. I could only teach you so much, there were things you needed to discover on your own, lessons you needed to learn for yourself. Though those lessons were hard, you never would have grown and matured the way you have by staying with us. I am happier than you can comprehend that you returned, that our family is whole once more. The feelings of remorse only show that you do have a conscience, a soul as it were, that guides you between the paths of right and wrong. There is no need for such precious gifts as penance. All is well. His thoughts of forgiveness and magnanimous nature only made me more determined to have them accept my gift. My resolve deepened and I spoke quietly, hoping this would convince them.
"Look, this isn't some sacrifice on my part in order to buy your forgiveness and acceptance." The compassion in their thoughts and worry in their eyes told me I wasn't doing a very good job of hiding my feelings. I spoke again, this time infusing calm into my tone. "I should have given you this ring years ago, when you were first married. This ring belonged to my parents, and now you are my parents and I want you to have it. I want it to symbolize your commitment to one another, your commitment to this family."
"Oh, Edward!" Esme cried in a strangled voice. She took the ring from my hand, her loving gaze on me all the while. Her thoughts betrayed the intensity of her emotions.
She stared at the ring for a moment, as it lay in her palm, before turning to gaze at her husband. He smiled at her briefly, and even without my gift I would have been able to see the conversation they had with their eyes. The thoughts of both were very clear to me and again I marveled at the complete harmony of their relationship. A pang of envy and regret ran through me, knowing I would never have what they did. My rebellious actions had barred any chances of me ever receiving such a gift.
She grasped my hand and pressed the ring into it before pulling me into a tight hug. Over her head, he smiled at me and, though I knew what she was going to say before she opened her mouth, I let her speak, let her words wash over me, bringing all three of us some comfort.
"While this ring is truly a beautiful symbol and I would be honored to wear it, I cannot accept it. You don't need to prove your commitment to this family by giving us such a gift. The fact that you came back is proof enough. We love you Edward, we love the person you have become. Your trial of faith has only made you a stronger, better person. A person we are honored to call our son." The choked emotion in her voice betrayed all of our feelings.
"Besides," she said, pulling back and slipping her hand in Carlisle's, "you are going to need that ring." They shared a fond look at my very skeptical expression. "I know that, someday, you are going to find a girl who you will want to give that ring to, a girl that you will love more than anything. I could never cheat her out of having something so close to your heart to symbolize the love you have for her."
I shook my head at her words and thoughts, knowing that it would never happen. Carlisle's smile turned even brighter at my reaction.
"She's right you know," he said. "Someday you will find someone who is to you what Esme is to me, the person that will complete you. Someday you will find your perfect fit."
Placing the ring back into its case, I smiled sardonically, and, although his words momentarily distracted me from my dark thoughts, I automatically discounted his conviction. I sincerely doubted that after everything I had done, whether I had a soul or not, I would ever be given such a precious gift.
"Show me the damn ring, Edward."
Inwardly I smiled, but kept my expression bland and shook my head. "No."
She stared at me, studying my face for some minute clue as to my mood. I wasn't giving anything away. She had to want this as much as I wanted to give it to her.
"Please?" she asked in a quiet, wistful tone. She ran the tips of her fingers lightly across my face. "Please, can I see it?"
Frowning, I narrowed my eyes. "You are the most dangerous creature I've ever met," I said through clenched teeth. She had finally discovered my weakness. I couldn't deny her when she asked like that and she knewit.
I glanced down at her. She sat against the headboard, her knees pulled into her chest, her arms wrapped around her legs. Her closed body language clearly showed that she didn't like this, she didn't want this in the same way I wanted it for her. Logically, I understood her reservations about marriage. She hadn't exactly had the best examples to work with, and in some ways she really wasn't ready for it. Marriage didn't mean the same things to her that it did to me. I was asking a lot from her, I knew that, but she was asking a lot from me, and this was how compromise worked.
This all sounded rational to me, but it didn't stop my feelings from being somewhat bruised every time she rejected my proposals or made a derogatory comment regarding marriage. If only she had a small inkling of how our marriage would be. We were nothinglike Charlie and Renee. Our love for each other had proven that. She wanted to be with me forever, I reminded myself. If she thought that I was going to let her become immortal, let her risk her soul, for me, without first ensuring our commitment to one another through the proper and traditional methods, she was sorely mistaken. We were going to do this right; we were going to spend the rest of our lives together in the eternal bond of husband and wife.
I climbed off the bed and knelt next to the nightstand, pulling open the drawer and retrieving the jewelry box placed there. Quickly, I rejoined her, putting my arm around her shoulders and placing the box on her left knee.
"Go ahead and look, then," I told her gruffly.
Her hand shook as she reached for it. Fear and resignation fought a determined battle across her face, flashed in her eyes. She hesitantly brushed her fingers over the smooth surface.
"You didn't spend a lot of money, did you? Lie to me if you did."
"I didn't spend anything," I assured her. "It's just another hand-me-down. This is the ring my father gave to my mother." I held the deeper emotions that these words invoked at bay. I was going to have what they had, what Carlisle and Esme had, what Jasper and Alice had…
"Oh." Her tone was surprised. She placed her fingers on the lid, but didn't open it.
"I suppose it's a little outdated," I told her, both euphoric and slightly embarrassed. "Old-fashioned, just like me. I can get you something more modern. Something from Tiffany's?" I probed, wondering if she would like that better, but hoping she would want this ring.
"I like old-fashioned things," she muttered as she hesitantly lifted the lid.
We both went utterly still, staring at my Mother's ring as it sparkled in the dim light of the room. Even after all these years, I still looked at it with awe and reverence. To me, it was still the symbol of a perfect true love, one that reached beyond the boundaries of normal feelings and into an almost spiritual reverence. It was the perfect emblem to represent the love Bella and I had for each other, and our commitment to that love.
She hesitantly reached out and ran her fingers along the gems. "It's so pretty," she almost whispered, sounding surprised.
"Do you like it?" I asked, looking down to gauge her reply.
"It's beautiful." She shrugged trying to look indifferent. "What's not to like?"
Her eyes betrayed her; they had softened immeasurably and she gazed at the ring with something akin to reverence. I laughed, trying to hold my jubilance and wonder to her reaction at bay. "See if it fits."
Her left hand suddenly clenched into a fist.
"Bella," I sighed. Obviously we were still going to have to work through her reservations. "I'm not going to solder it to your finger. Just try it on so I can see if it needs to be sized. Then you can take it right off."
"Fine," she said in a disgruntled tone.
She reached for the ring, but I had it in my hand before her fingers could even brush against it. I look her left hand in mine and slid the ring into place on her third finger. I held her hand out so we could both observe its effect. If possible, it looked even more beautiful. Powerful emotions welled up in me, threatening to spill over. Everything felt right, the world was perfect.
"A perfect fit," I observed, striving for nonchalance. Suddenly, Carlisle's prophetic words from years ago came back to me. I now had something I thought I would never have, a gift I thought I would never be given. I had my perfect fit. Waves of gratitude for Carlisle and Esme and their faith in both me and whatever greater power existed out there coursed through me. "That's nice – saves me trip to the jeweler's."
"You like that, don't you?" She asked, her tone suspicious. She fluttered her fingers, still gazing at the ring.
I shrugged, trying to keep my tone calm and casual. "Sure. It looks very nice on you."
She stared into my eyes, and I gazed back, knowing that my carefully placed façade was about to crumble, that she would be able to see everything that I was thinking and feeling as soon as the walls fell. But it didn't matter, I thought, letting my defenses slip. I had won, I had gotten what I wanted most in the world, and I would have it forever.
Her breath caught as I threw away the last of my pretenses. Suddenly I was kissing her, kissing her with such joy, such abandon, that nothing else in the world mattered. I pulled my lips away, trying to control my lungs and leaned over to breathe in her ear, "Yes, I like it. You have i no /i idea."
Her laugh was joyful, her breath coming out in gasps. "I believe you."
"Do you mind if I do something?" I asked, my arms tightening around her convulsively as I thought of what I was about to do.
"Anything you want."
I let her go and slid away.
"Anything but that," she whined.
I ignored her, took her hand and gently pulled her from the bed. Placing my hands on her shoulders, I led her to stand in front of me.
"Now, I want to do this right. Please, please, keep in mind that you've already agreed to this, and don't ruin it for me."
"Oh, no," she exhaled, as I slid down onto one knee.
"Be nice," I muttered.
She gulped.
"Isabella Swan?" I looked up at her, letting everything I was feeling show in my eyes, letting her see that I wanted to give her everything I had, everything I was. "I promise to love you forever – every single day of forever. Will you marry me?"
She stared at me for a minute, several different emotions flashing across her face, lighting her eyes. I waited, unable to move.
"Yes." Her response was barely a whisper.
"Thank you," I said quietly, exultantly. Reverently, I reached for her left hand and kissed each of her fingertips before kissing the ring on her third finger. I finally had my perfect fit.
