Notes:
Claimer: This time the story is actually by me. It's my first ever story written in English. Keep in mind that it's not my mother tongue. Fortunately, I have a lot of people helping me out with it. So a special thanks goes to Niamh, Weronika, Helena and everyone on twitter and tumblr keeping me motivated. Thanks for your help, I love you guys!
Disclaimer: None of this actually happened.
Warning: Chris may seem very OOC at times, but there's reasons.
There will be three or four more chapters in the future. I hope you enjoy!
Chapter 1 – The Secret
Sometimes, PJ could hear voices. Seriously, he could. Especially on friday nights. The first time it happened, he had just moved in with Chris, a drama school student he hadn't known previously to moving.
Weirdly enough, on that evening, he was just sitting on the toilet in his new flat playing Tuber Simulator, a game his friend Felix, who also happened to own the most subscribed YouTube channel, thank you very much - had released just recently.
He wasn't paying much attention to the outside world - until he heard the front door of the shared flat slam shut, followed by a female voice asking very quietly:
'Are we really alone?'
Another voice, this one clearly belonging to his flatmate Chris, replied: 'Yeah, don't worry, my flatmate isn't coming back until later tonight. I told you.'
The next thing PJ knew, he was sitting in the dark, because someone had turned off the light from outside the bathroom door.
Bloody bastard, PJ thought.
There was no doubt whatsoever Chris didn't know he was home. He wanted to kill the man. But, instead, he rolled his eyes and stayed where he was. He guessed they would be very busy in just a few minutes and probably wouldn't even notice when he was, as Chris exclaimed earlier, 'coming home later tonight'.
So, he continued playing in the dark for around twenty more minutes until he felt safe enough to leave the bathroom, pretending he was just coming home.
Oh, the things he did for Chris. He remembered how, back then, he thought that he was doing him a favour.
If only PJ had known it would become standard procedure.
Now PJ had been living with Chris for almost a year and friday nights like this were happening all too frequently. This friday night was no exception.
PJ was just setting his camera on the tripod upside-down in order to shoot some super-slow-motion shots when he heard the front door open. Then he heard the rustling sound of clothes that had become a little too familiar to him.
'Shit, seriously?' a man outside PJ's door said. The voice was unknown to him. Deep. A voice he didn't recognise. 'I thought you lived by yourself.'
He then heard Chris hiss: 'Keep it down please. And no worries, my flatmate is a bit of a nerd, he's probably already asleep anyway.'
Of course in Chris's opinion he was, what one would call, a 'nerd', PJ mused. It was either that, or 'an uptight virgin', sometimes 'a freak without hobbies' - or, on a good day, he would call him 'one of those weird film students' as if that fact alone explained why he wasn't dragging someone from a pub into their shared flat every week, like his oh-so-attractive flatmate.
PJ was used to it by now.
It wasn't anything so new that people frowned or sneered at him.
From the rustling and the sounds of footsteps that followed, it appeared that the conversation between the two men outside was over. PJ assumed that they were busy doing, well, whatever they were doing. Or whoever, in these instances.
Someone let the door next to his room shut with, what one can describe as, the gentleness of a sledgehammer. All jokes aside, Chris really, truly deserved to win the prize of most considerate person of the year. PJ sighed.
Then silence.
Silence was never a good sign with Chris.
Before he could overhear anything else PJ put his camera back on his desk, walked over to the computer, turned on an Arcade Fire playlist on Spotify and turned up the volume all the way, in the futile hope Chris might get that he was indeed still awake and absolutely not interested in having to listen to his rather obscene nocturnal activities.
Unfortunately, he never did.
PJ was glad he didn't need any sound for his slow-motion-shots.
The next morning, PJ got up early to upload his new video. He was really proud of his creation this time. He had tried some new approaches to filming in low-light situations and a whole new editing technique, and, if he was honest, he was pretty satisfied with the outcome. His subscribers would love it. Later tonight he was planning to upload the Making Of as well.
With a subtle smile on his lips, PJ shut the laptop and left his room in order to find the one thing he lived for besides making films – food. Man, was he starving. It was time for some good old scrambled eggs.
PJ had just opened the door to the kitchen when he heard someone open another one behind him. It had to be the one leading to Chris' bedroom, as all the other doors were now open.
'Good morning,' the deep voice PJ recognised from last night murmured . PJ glanced over his shoulder to face the person the voice belonged to. The man was ridiculously handsome – Chris has some good taste, I'll give him that.
And he was tall. Even a little taller than him.
'Morning,' PJ greeted casually, as if meeting strangers in the hallway on a Saturday morning was the most regular thing in the world.
The stranger looked at him with a curious look on his face before the corners of his lips turned upwards into a playful smile. 'You know, your flatmate wouldn't shut up about you last night. But he forgot to mention that you're hot.'
PJ smiled, but was almost floored by the blunt words. Talk about honest. 'Yeah, he does that.' he said simply, and couldn't help but laugh a little. That was until he noticed the stranger's eyes roam his body and instantly began to feel uncomfortable.
'Wants to keep you all to himself, I guess. Well, who could blame him?' the man leered, more to himself than to PJ, while putting on his shoes.
'Could it be -' the man started. 'Are you two in some kind of open relationship?'
PJ chuckled, albeit nervously. 'That's a good one, I bet he would love the idea,' he heard himself reply. He wasn't even lying. Chris would love it so much PJ had to make sure to never mention it to him ever.
The man raised an eyebrow at him, and at the same time seemed to remember something, as he took his jacket off the hanger before opening the front door. Then he nodded absentmindedly, looking as if in thought.
'To be honest, that would explain some things.'
He waved goodbye and then, with a suggestive wink at PJ, left their flat, leaving a slightly puzzled PJ behind.
PJ had just finished making tea when he heard the other's bedroom door open again. It didn't take long until he heard someone turn on the shower in the bathroom.
He finally got to make breakfast. He had been living sugar-free for a few months now and ever since then food had become an even more important part of his life. He loved trying new recipes. Eating healthy simply felt amazing; he had so much more energy, especially in the morning. He never wanted to go back to his old lifestyle.
It didn't take long until Chris emerged from the bathroom and joined him in the kitchen.
'Morning,' he groaned, walking through the door frame wearing nothing but a towel loosely knotted at the hip. 'Would you please kill me right now? Thanks.' He was stifling a yawn with one hand as he spoke, his voice straining.
'Believe me, I would, but I haven't had breakfast yet', PJ replied.
'Just my luck.' Chris swerved past PJ, reached up and opened a cupboard, pulling out a mug. PJ noticed that he smelled, well, really nice. As much as he would like to deny it, the other man was one attractive bastard. No wonder he got anyone he wanted to be with, PJ admitted scornfully. He tried to distract himself by cracking a few eggs in a bowl, and then staring at them for a prolonged period of time.
'Who was that guy?' he heard himself ask without thinking, regretting the question only a second later.
'No idea', Chris said and shrugged. 'Why would you want to know?' PJ knew Chris was smirking without even looking at him.
Of course he would. He always did.
Well, two could play at this game.
'He said you didn't mention I was hot.' PJ said, trying to sound as casual as possible.
Chris had turned around to face him, holding a mug in his hands. He looked surprised. PJ mostly wondered why he didn't try to deny that PJ was hot right away. Instead he just stared at him for a few more seconds, seemingly waiting for him to continue, but then his eyes narrowed and the smirk returned.
'Oh, really? Peej, that's so cute,' Chris cooed. All of a sudden he didn't look as tired anymore. 'Don't tell me that if I had asked you would've joined us?' Chris queried, his smirk growing.
PJ knew that Chris knew the answer before the question had even formed in his mind.
'Not in a million years.' PJ said, fully aware that the reason he was inferring so was Chris' part in the deal. For a millisecond PJ thought he saw pain flicker in the other man's eyes, but he knew him well enough to know that it probably wasn't the case. The guy had far too much confidence to be hurt by a little joke like that.
Or had he?
'I see.' Chris replied with an unreadable expression, trying actively to relax his shoulders, while grabbing the glass bowl off their coffee machine in order to fill it with water. 'He's just sleeping around, you know' he added quickly. 'And last time I checked that wasn't what you're into' He put the filled bowl into the coffee machine and grabbed a filter. 'Or did you suddenly discover your primal needs or something?'
PJ looked at him and wasn't quite sure what he was trying to get out of this anymore. Chris was right, he wouldn't want to be with anyone he couldn't trust. He wasn't even interested in the stranger he had just met for a few minutes in the hallway. For some reason all he was interested in, at that exact moment, was to annoy Chris as much as possible.
'Just because I want to be with someone who's loyal doesn't mean I don't have, well, needs,' PJ said. 'Not everything is about sex, in case you weren't aware.'
Chris chuckled. He looked at PJ as if he was some kind of rare species of animal and said - 'If you think about it, everything is about sex though'. Grinning at him again, he added: 'If you thought about it, I mean, because obviously you don't. But, if you did, you would see.'
PJ couldn't help but snort. 'You're a miracle to me, Chris,' he said, almost in awe. 'I don't know how you do it.'
'Do what?' Chris looked at him curiously.
'Be so confident, do all that stuff like it's nothing, meet all those people, I don't know.' He shrugged.
'It's easy,' Chris replied while turning on the coffee machine.
'All it takes is five seconds. It's like a rule.' He faced PJ, the familiar grin yet again playing across his lips.
'If you want something…'
He took a step closer to PJ.
'...Or someone'
Another step.
'...You have five seconds to act.'
Step.
PJ hadn't noticed he'd been walking backwards until Chris put a hand on the fridge door behind him, backing PJ up against it. His smirk had vanished.
PJ suddenly felt his heart trying to climb up his throat and jump out his mouth.
Chris looked deep into his eyes as if searching for something. PJ held his breath.
'Before the impulse just disappears', Chris ended.
And there it was again, a flash of something in the other man's eyes PJ didn't know how to read - just before Chris took his arm down again, turned around to take a cup of coffee and walked towards the door. 'So, never wait too long, you know, just act. That's the whole secret.' he added before leaving the kitchen.
That was the moment PJ knew he was doomed.