Kagome was waiting for Inuyasha to come home from work. They were going to a bar with a singing competition that night. Kagome entered herself and didn't want to be late.
Inuyasha finally came home and said, "Hey, Kags. You ready to go?"
"Let's roll," Kagome said as they got out to their ebony 2008 Jaguar XK and headed to the bar.
When they entered, their friends were already there.
"Hey, Kags! You ready to sing?" Sango asked.
"Not really. I don't even know what to sing," Kagome admitted truthfully.
"Don't worry. It'll come to you," said Miroku as she went for a feel of Sango's butt for the fifth time that night.
"HENTAI!!!" Sango screamed as she slapped Miroku across the table and made him land on Koga.
"Damn, it was worth it," Miroku sighed as he got up and apologized.
As Kagome was getting ready to sing, she saw her cousin Kikyo all over her husband.
Kikyo looked like she belonged to a brothel. She was mini skirt that was two centimeters from showing something no self-respecting woman would want to show, but her legs were covered by knee length boots. She was also wearing high-heeled boots and a low cut strapless that was almost cut too low to be in fashion. However, her outfit worked well with her, what with her long legs and ample cleavage. The only thing that didn't work with what she was doing was that 1) she was wearing enough make up to thickly cover a blue whale, 2) the guy she flirting with just happened to be married and 3) he was married to Kagome.
It was as if the bimbo couldn't see the ring on his finger. Suddenly, Kagome got the idea for the song she would sing just as her name was called.
She got up on stage, grabbed the microphone and stated, "This song is dedicated to my darling little cousin, Kikyo."
She told the band the name of the song, which they all knew and picked up on the beat.
Well, you're a real hot cookie with a new hairdo, your high-heeled boots, and your credit card.
Long legs and mini-skirt. Yeah, you know what works and you work it hard.
Kikyo was smiling at this. 'She finally realizes who the better woman is. Maybe, this time, she'll divorce Inuyasha and leave him all to me,' Kikyo thought. Yeah right.
You smile like such a lady, innocent and sweet.
You drive the men folk crazy, but any girl can see you're just a
Homewrecker!
I know what you're doin'!
You think you're gonna ruin what I got, but you're not!
Yeah, you little go getter, I'll teach you a lesson if you go to messin' with my man.
You don't stand a chance.
No, you're just a Homewrecker.
This got Kikyo blushing. 'My own family is doing this to me? How could she be so heartless?' (N.N. Does she realize that she is being just as cold by dating her cousin-in-law?)(A.N. Hush, Nara!)
Inuyasha was just laughing at this. He never really liked Kikyo. Tell the truth, he had been trying to get away since she started pushing herself on him.
I'm sure you waited for a long, long, time to find a man like mine but, Honey, you're too late.
So before you go and make your move, maybe me and you should get a few things straight.
There's two ways we can do this, I'll let you decide.
You can take it somewhere else or we can take it outside!
Kikyo was really embarrassed, now. Kagome knew that not only did Kikyo dump Inuyasha, but she knew that Kagome could kick Kikyo's ass.
'Damn her. She is publicly humiliating me. On purpose! How dare she?'
Yeah, you little Homewrecker, I know what you're doin'.
You think you're gonna ruin what I got, but you're not.
Yeah, you little go getter, I'll teach you a lesson if you go to messin' with my man.
You don't stand a chance.
No, you're just a Homewrecker.
The only thing keeping Kikyo from running right out the door was one of the bouncers and Inuyasha's half-brother, Sesshomaru. (N.N. He just looks the type, you know?)(A.N. I said hush!)
This next part got everybody cheering, hooting and hollering.
Now, Honey, I'm a Christian, but if you keep it up, I'm gonna go to kickin' your pretty little butt.
Is that clear enough?
Yeah, you little Homewrecker, I'll teach you a lesson if you go to messin' with my man.
You don't stand a chance.
No, you're just a Homewrecker.
At this point, Kagome got off the stage, with the mic and strutted towards Kikyo and Inuyasha.
Yeah, you're just a Homewrecker
Homewrecker
"Back off, Kinky ho," Kagome said to Kikyo. The end of the song just so happened to be the end of Kinky ho's- I mean, Kikyo's consciousness for the night as Kagome punched in the face at the last beat of the bass drum.
"Wow," Inuyasha said simply. "I'd hate to see what you would sing if I was cheating on you."
"Well, Inu, I'd end up singing 'The Night The Lights went Out in Georgia' by Reba McEntire. Guess who's gonna have the gun?" Kagome said as she walked to their Jag.
Sango and Miroku just laughed and got into their 2006 Nissan Altima. They couldn't wait to tell their friends Bankotsu and Jakotsu what happened.
Koga just left in his 2003 Chevy Silverado. If he told his wife, Ayame, what happened, she would flip.
Sesshomaru left at closing time to go home to his daughter. Funny, he remembered his wife being just like Kikyo- the Homewrecker of the century. The best gift he got was Rin. Everything else, was a real pain in his ass. Then, just after thinking that, he just said, "Screw it," and drove home in his 2004 Ducati Monster.
When Inuyasha and Kagome got home, they immediately hit the couch and just cuddled. Suddenly, a thought came to Inuyasha. "Hey, Kagome?"
"Yeah, Inuyasha?"
"Would you really shoot me if I was cheating on you?"
"No."
"That's good."
"I'd just make sure you would never cheat again."
"HUH? What do you mean?"
"Sorry, I'm not telling."
Katana: Should have said this before, but I own nothing. I don't even own the song. "Homewrecker" belongs to Gretchen Wilson. I don't own the cars either. I wish I owned the Ducati, but I don't. Oh, well. Life's tough. Get a helmet.