Adam's Homecoming:
I couldn't believe it I'm was finally home. Pa and Hoss were the first to hug me and welcome me back, Little Joe was next, but his twin didn't make a move towards me. Instead Jacqueline's eyes were shooting daggers. She should have forgotten the promise she made three years ago, not that I had.
The day I left the Ponderosa was the hardest of my life. Jacqueline came into my room while I finish packing with the stuffed dog, I gave her last Christmas.
"Don't go," she said simply.
"Sweetie, we've talked about this. I'm only going for three years. I promise to write," I said. I spent months making sure the twins could read enough for me to write to them while I was gone.
"Don't go," She said louder pouting.
"Jacqueline, honey you're almost seven, too old to pout," I admonished, "You know why I am leaving and it won't be forever."
"DON'T GO!" She finally screamed. Her outburst brought Hoss running into the room.
"Sorry, Adam, she got away from me. Pa said I shouldn't let her bother ya," He said picking the little girl up and carrying her out of the room her screaming the entire time "Don't go, Don't go, Don't go."
Little Joe had tried the night before to stop me from leaving too. It was easier to say no to him, because I used an old trick. I told him that he was a big boy now and needed to act like a grown-up. I also asked him to watch over his baby sister, because I wouldn't be there to do it. Joe accepted the responsibility, didn't say another word about my leaving.
That hadn't worked with Jacqueline. She used tears last night and this morning to my amazement threw a tantrum at the breakfast table. Something she hadn't done since she was two. The tantrum caused Pa to give her a spanking. Now she tried this, leaving again throwing another tantrum. I hoped Pa is getting the horses together, I think he's almost out of patience with his baby girl.
Once outside, she had stopped her tantrum. Hoss or Little Joe must have said something to her. Pa loaded the bags in the carriage, as he did Jacqueline ran back into the house and returned with a small bag.
"I'm going too," She announced.
"No, you need to stay here and go to school. If you want when you're bigger you can go to college," I tried to explained.
"Fine," she said throwing her bag across the yard and crossing her arms.
"Jacqueline Anne-Marie Cartwright pick up the bag and get into the house so we can finish packing without any more interruptions from you," Pa said firmly.
Jacqueline looked at Pa and I couldn't believe what she screamed,
"NO! YOU'RE LETTING HIM GO!"
"Hoss, please take your sister inside." Pas said calmly. Hoss picked her up as tears filled her dark brown eyes. Little Joe followed her inside.
"Pa, please don't spank her again. She just doesn't want me to go," I said feeling so guilty.
"I know, son" Pa said softly.
Once the bags were packed, we all headed for the stage so I could leave. Jacqueline hadn't said a word since her last outburst. Little Joe was holding her hand as her tears fell the entire trip to town. I could barely look at her, without wanting to cry myself.
We put the bags on the stage and it was time to go. Hugs and good-bye wishes went all around. When it was my baby sister's turn she refused.
"I'm never going to forgive you for leaving me, Adam Cartwright," she said and ran away crying.
"Don't worry Pa, I'll get her," Hoss said chasing after our baby sister.
Pa saw the hurt in my eyes and said, "Don't worry, she'll be fine. This is a great opportunity for you,"
"I know." I said sighing.
I cried like a baby for the first part of the trip. I didn't want to leave her anymore than she wanted me to go. I knew I needed to go to college and wanted to, but I left a little piece of my heart on the Ponderosa with that little girl.
Now three years later that same little girl refused to acknowledge me my existence. Finally I said,
"Hi, Jacqueline."
"It's Jax," she said still refusing to look at me.
"Oh, yeah I remember Pa saying something like that in a letter. Can I have a hug? I've really missed you."
I believe the only reason she gave me the hug was the look she got from Pa. We loaded into the wagon, Jax still refusing to look at me or talk to me. I decided not to push it. When someone pushes me, I tend to push back. All of the letters from Pa made it sound like she was the same way. Once we were home. She looked at Pa and said,
"May I please go upstairs and finish my homework?"
"No you have to finish your chores. Also Hop Sing would like help in the kitchen," Pa said.
"Yes sir."
"I guess I should go too," Little Joe said giving me another hug. "Welcome home, Adam."
"I don't get it, Pa" Hoss said. "For the past month all she could talk about was Adam's coming home and now she's acting like a spoiled brat. It's not like her."
"I'm sorry Adam, Jax can be a puzzle sometimes. Hoss is right; she usually doesn't act like this and knows I won't tolerate it. I'll talk to her in a few minutes so I can figure out what's bothering her," Pa said.
I was really hurt by Jax's reactions. Things only got worse throughout the afternoon. Pa's talk just seemed to make her angrier. She refused to talk to anyone. Little Joe tried everything to get her out of the mood she was in. Hoss did too. Tired of her pouting Pa told her start her homework.
"Oh, now I get to do my homework, not earlier when I wanted to." Jax mumbled picking up her stuff.
"Jacqueline." Pa said quietly warning her to stop.
"WHAT," Jax snapped without thinking.
"Go to your room. I'll be there directly," Pa said calmly.
When I was her age that meant Pa would be up in a few minutes to tan your hide. Jax stomped up the stairs. Once she reached her room, she slammed the door. I couldn't believe how stubborn and fearless she was. I wouldn't have dared act like that when I was her age.
I knew she really deserved and needed the tanning, but before Pa headed upstairs, I asked, "Pa, can I try?"
"She's lucky that it's your first day home and I won't refuse you anything tonight " Pa said smiling. "I don't know what has gotten into that girl today."
I knocked on her door and walked into her room. She was surprised it was me; I could see the relief in her eyes that it wasn't Pa. After a second of relief, her hard look returned and she turned away from me. I noticed she was holding something and realized that it was her stuffed dog, making me feel a little better. So I said,
"Hi."
"Hi."
"I really missed you," I said.
"Why did you go? I begged you not to go," She said finally looking at me with tears in her eyes.
"I wanted to learn new things and see new things. I wrote to you every week like I promised."
"It wasn't the same after you left," she said.
"So you were miserable the entire time I was gone? It didn't seem like it from the letters you and Little Joe sent me," I said smiling.
"No, but I missed you. I was so excited for the past few weeks about your coming home, but when I saw you it all came back. The anger and the hurt," She said with tears streaming down her face. "You always made me feel better, when I was sad or hurt. You read me a story or rocked me to sleep even after Pa already did. You helped fill in the gap after Mama left. All of that ended the day you left me too."
"I'm back now."
"It's different; I'm ten and I'm not a baby anymore. So you can't rock me to sleep or read me a story. You missed it." Jax said.
I couldn't believe how smart and intuitive this little girl was. She was right I had missed it. The guilt came roaring back, but I shoved it away just as quick. I decided she needed to realize first that I missed her and second that I wouldn't put up with her stubborn outbursts any more than Pa would.
"Jax, I know you're not a baby anymore. So do you think your behavior today has been acceptable?" I asked sternly.
"No. I was mad." She answered honestly.
"So are you mad anymore?"
"No. I'm really glad you're home." She said giving be a huge hug.
"Thanks sis," I said starting to leave.
"Adam, I'm sorry for how I acted. I haven't acted that way since the day you left. I guess Hop Sing right, life is like a circle. I was a brat the day you left and I was a brat the day you returned," She said smiling.
"Well, let me tell you something little sister, if you ever act like that again I'll give you the tanning of your life," I said sitting back down and she returned to my arms hugging me.
"That's fair. I should warn you though, Joe and I are great at getting out of trouble," she added with a devilish grin.
"Well, litter sister. I'm pretty good at figuring things out. Maybe you two have met your match," I said smiling.
"I doubt it, but you can try," She challenged. She sat there hugging me for the next few minutes.
I felt her back stiffen as it finally dawned on her that Pa hadn't come up yet. She looked downstairs, it was the first time I'd seen fear in her eyes and she said quietly, "Pa should be here any minute. I mean I guess he should come up, I was mean and spiteful."
I actually laughed at her rebuke of her own behavior.
"Is not funny Adam, I never act like a brat."
"So you know you were wrong?"
"Obviously, but Pa's not going to let me get away with it. I broke like ten rules in less than ten seconds," She said miserably.
"I'll give a little gift today, baby sister. I'll ask Pa not to tan you."
"Really?" She asked hopefully.
"Yes, but you need to apologize to everyone and come down when it's time for dinner as the girl from the letters, not the brat I've seen today."
"I will," She said the devilish grin crossing her face again.
"Go get your homework. If I remeber you said you want to go to college someday."
"What I really said, was I wanted to go with you. Not that I wanted to go to college," Jax said running out the door, before I could say another word.
I watch my baby sister run down the stairs to get her homework and apologize. I knew was forgiven for leaving her.
It only took a few days to realize that Jax was right, her and Joe were great at getting in and out of trouble. They really keep me on my toes. I have no idea how Pa dealt with those two alone the three years I was gone. Two adults against the two ten year olds were much better odds.