I Will Kill You Jak!!!
Inu65: hello, hello. CTC and I had this really fucked up idea about her and I getting zapped into Jak 2.
Jak: *mumbles string of colorful words…..*
Inu65: *jumps up and attempts to slap Jak**fails miserably**
Jak: -_-;; moron…..
Inu65: *glare, glare* anyway, CTC is about 85% done with the game…..and says a whole lot of colorful words and THAT'S HOW WE GOT THE IDEA!!
Jak: *sarcastically* yeaaah……
Daxter: *playing with Inu65's TV* what the hell is this thing?
CTC: yuppies. I'm almost done! Although I'm stuck on this one part…….WHY WON'T HE JUMP?!?!?!
Inu65: I'm getting a headache just thinking about it…… well, here's goes nothin!!
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I Will Kill You Jak Chapter 1, The Evil Game of Hell
"EVIL GAME OF HELL!!" cried Rayme (CTC) pounding Keito's (Inu65) controller on the bed. "WHY WON'T HE JUMP?!?!? JAK, I WILL KILL YOU!!! I WILL FUCKING GET ZAPPED INTO THE FUCKING GAME AND KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS!!!" Rayme yelled at the TV because Jak wouldn't jump over a pit of snotty green gooze that burns when you land in it. Keito hid under her comforter and clamped her ears shut. "RAYME, IT'S JUST A STUPID GAME!!" Keito yelled, peaking her head from under the covers. "Just a game you say?! JUST A GAME?!" Rayme said acidly. "IT WILL BE A GAME, WHEN I CAN JUMP OVER THE FUCKING THING!!" Rayme yelled. "You need serious anger management girl…." Keito said with a sigh. Rayme's left eye began to twitch.
Then, all of a sudden………ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!! The two teenaged girls fell from the sky screaming bloody murder.
With a loud thud, the two teens landed on two unsuspecting things, a really big eared 6'10" kangaroo dude, and a small orange mutated squirrel…..rodent…..thing. "Owies….I think I broke my ass-bone…." groaned Keito, getting off the rodent thing. "Yeah well, I think you broke every bone in my BODY!!" the thing said. "Daxter, you ok?" the big eared dude said. "Am I ok? DO I LOOK OK?! Yeah I ok, pal. You?" Rayme looked down on whoever she landed on. Her eyes grew wide, and her face redden. "Jak…..it's time for me to KICK YOUR SCRAWNY ASS!!" Rayme yelled grabbing him by his shoulders and banging his head on the ground. "WHY WOULDN'T YOU JUMP?!?!?!" she yelled. Keito sweat dropped while Daxter jumped on Rayme and was trying to pry her hands off him. "WHY WOULDN'T YOU JUMP?!?!?!" she yelled again. Jak, finally got away from the crazed Rayme. "What the hell is wrong with you?!" Jak said dusting himself off. "She's pissed at you." Keito said. "Uh, I kinda figured that." Jak said. "But why?" Jak added. "Beats the shit outta me." Keito said. "Because, dear Jak, YOU WOULDN'T JUMP!!!" Rayme yelled pointing her finger at Jak. "What the hell do you mean I wouldn't jump?" he asked. Rayme opened her mouth to speak, then stopped to think. "Ummm, you wouldn't jump, uuuh, like three weeks ago BECAUSE YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAVE ME!!" Rayme lied. Jak raised a questioning eyebrow. "Oh, really?" he said in a disbelieving tone. "Uuuh, yeah." Rayme said. "Don't you recognize me?" "Now that you mention it, you look awfully like that hooker in that one bar. The one who was trying to hit on me." Jak said rubbing his chin in thought. Rayme's jaw dropped and her left eye began to twitch a little. "Uhhh, no. that was the other bar." Keito said. "This is the hooker from this bar…….oh shit, wait!!" Keito said again. Rayme then pulled out a huge frying pan and bashed them all over the head with it. "I'm no hooker. Never was, never will. BUT SHE IS!!" Rayme said pointing to Keito. "WHAT THE FUCK YOU TALKIN ABOUT GIRL!?!?!?! I AIN'T NO DAMNED HOOKER!!! I have more respect than that…….hey Jak, can I touch your ears?" Keito said, changing the subject completely. "ME TOO!" Rayme chimed in. Keito and Rayme jumped up and down trying to touch Jak's ears. "I'm 6'10". I think you guys are going to have a hard time doing so." Jak said. "Then bend your ass down so we can touch em!!" Keito said still jumping up and down. "Yeah really…..lazy ass….." Rayme said. "I ALMOST GOT EM!!" Keito yelled.
"Hey, what kinda people are you guys? You're ears are short and stubby." Daxter said, pulling Keito's ear. "STOP HURTING OUR FEELINGS!!!" Keito cried, yanking Daxter's tail. "AAAAAAAAAH!!1 STOP THAT BITCH!! I JUST GOT IT STRAIGHTEND!!!" Daxter yelled. "We're humans. You don't know what we are." Rayme said watching Keito and Daxter pull each others hair and ears. "Hey, you two, stop it." Jak said. Keito and Daxter froze, still hanging onto each others hair and ears.
"So, uh Jak, can you help us. You know, find a place to stay and all?" Rayme said. "OR ELSE MY SNAKE WILL KILL YOU!!" she yelled holding out a wooden snake that moves. "Uh, do you think I'm scared of this?" Jak asked taking the wooden toy snake from Rayme's hands. "You should be, 'cause it's alive." Keito said. "See, it moves!!" Rayme said taking her snake back and making it move. "SEE? SEE?!" Rayme kept making it move until the head of the snake went flying off and hit some guy in the head. "Ok, never mind." Rayme said. "That was a violation with the Crimson Guard Squad. You are under arrest." the guy said starting to run over along with five other guys. Then a ton of others showed their ugly faces. "Ah, fuck!" Jak cursed. "Wha-wha-WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO?!?!?!" Keito yelled, starting to spaz out. Then, Jak grabbed Rayme and Keito's shirt collars and commandeered a hover craft and started to fly off. "HOLD ON YOU GUYS!!" Jak yelled back as the hover craft zoomed off. "YOU GUYS ARE IDIOTS!!" Daxter yelled at the two teens. "HOW THE FUCK WHRE WE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT THOSE UGLY GUYS ARE EVIL LITTLE FUCK HEADS?!?!" Keito yelled, strangling Daxter with one hand while hanging onto Jak's waist with the other. "COULDN'T YOU TELL BY THE GUNS AND THE SUIT THAT THEY WERE BAD?!??!" Daxter yelled. "HE HAS A GUN AND A……well, he doesn't have a suit, but HE STILL HAS A GUN!!! AND A BIG ONE AT THAT!!" Keito yelled.
Jak lead them to the Underground place. They parked in front of the Underground and Jak lead them down to a large tunnel. "Jak, who the hell are these….things?" Torn said. "Friends." Jak said. Keito looked at Rayme and said, "We are? OH MY GOD!! I HAVE ANOTHER FRIEND!! YAYNESS!! But on thing, how could we be friends when she tried to kill you. Plus you don't even know our names." Rayme smacked Keito over the head. "Yayness is my word, bitch." Rayme said. "Whatever. Jak you have to go on another mission for me. It seems that the Crimson Guards have a huge supply of Dark Eco." Torn said. Jak sighed heavily. "You need to destroy every single one of those crates." Torn said. "But be careful. Be sure to shoot from a distance. The explosion will cause damage to you too." "Where do I go?" Jak said. "It's at the pumping station." Torn said. "Great." Jak said sarcastically. "Where's that?" Keito asked Rayme. "Somewhere far, far away in a magical little fairy land named Joe-Bob." Rayme said sarcastically. "Really? Can I come?!" Keito said. "You dumb-butt! It's here in Haven City, jack-ass!!" Rayme said. "Hey, it's not my fault that I don't know a single thing about this game…..world…..WHATEVER WE'RE IN!!" Keito said.
"Come on Dax. Let's go." Jak said. "Got it buddy!" Daxter said jumping onto Jak's shoulder. "Whoa, whoa, whoa Jak. You're not leaving these strange creatures with me." Torn said looking at Rayme and Keito. Jak sighed. "I can't take them. It's too dangerous." Jak said. "Then turn them in to the Crimson Guards." Torn said. Jak gave a slight laugh. "And risk my skin? You already know what happens when I get too close." Jak said. "What are they anyway?" Torn asked pulling Keito's ear. She glared at Torn through the corner of her dark brown eyes.
"Why the hell is everyone pulling my freakin ears?!" she growled. Rayme laughed a bit. "They said there humans…..whatever those are." Daxter said. "Funny lookin creatures aren't they?" Daxter added. "Look who's talkin mongoose boy." Keito growled again. "What the hell is a mongoose?" Jak asked. "Uuuh, it's like Daxter, but it doesn't talk nor does it have a rounded snout. It walks on all fours and eats snakes." Rayme explained as best as she could.
"Anyway. Jak, you are not leaving these humans here with me." Torn said. Jak sighed again. "Fine. You two, your coming too." Jak said heading for the door. Keito and Rayme looked at each other and followed. "Umm, Jak, what about weapons for them?" Daxter said. "Damnit. I forgot." Jak said quietly. At the sound of the word 'weapon', Keito perked up a bit. "Hey Rayme, we get weapons!!" she whispered into Rayme's ear. "I'm not deaf you know." Rayme said.
"Ummm, Jak, I'd hate to be a pest, but uhh, do you think we could get some shoes first? When we got here, we didn't have anything except the clothes on our backs. We'll tell ya the details later, but it really would be nice if we had shoes." Rayme said. Jak looked down at their feet. Keito didn't have socks on and Rayme did have socks. "No shoes for me thanks. Don't like em." Keito said. "Um, you girl with the bare feet, you have to have something." Jak said. Keito sighed. "Oh, alright." she said, hanging her head. Jak walked to a closet and pulled out two pairs of boots. To them, they were small, to Keito and Rayme, they were huge. "Thanks." they both said, putting them on. "Hey, Keito, don't you have socks?" Rayme asked. "OH YEAH!! I forgot that they were in my pocket!" Keito said taking out her socks and putting them on. Rayme rolled her eyes. "These are too big." Rayme said. "Just right for me, but I have big feet, for a teenaged human girl." Keito said standing up.
"Ok, lets go. First we have to get you guys some guns." Jak said. The two girls followed Jak. "Sooo, what's you guys' names?" Daxter asked. "I'm Keito, and that's Rayme. They're not our real names, but we like to call each other by them." Keito said. "Yeah. If you translate Keito's name into English, it's her real name." Rayme said. Jak gave them an odd look. "Then what language is it then?" he asked. "Japanese." both of them answered in unison. "I won't even ask…." Jak said walking to a small room. He opened the door and pulled out two guns. "Here." he said handing them each one. "Umm, Jak I warn you. Keito is rather trigger happy. When she plays Unreal Tournament, no one stays alive, unless they're on her team that is." Rayme said. Daxter leaned over to Jak's ear. "She entered a tournament at her age? Well, I don't know how old she is, but she's a teen!" Daxter whispered into Jak's ear. "HEY, HEY, HEY!! Rayme, it's like the Minigun in Unreal Tournament!! Great!! I love that gun! Not as much as I love the Redeemer though. That gun is kick ass!!" Keito said. "Riight. Well then, since we're all set, let's get going then." Jak said with cautious step away from Keito. Daxter swallowed hard. Keito and Rayme followed Jak, holding their new weapons close. Jak kept glancing behind through the corner of his eye, obviously nervous on what Keito and Rayme might do. Especially after hearing that Keito was already in a tournament, that used guns. That didn't settle right with Jak. Didn't settle right at all.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*End Chapter 1
Inu65: so how was it?
Jak: you're scaring me…..*edges away from Inu65*
CTC: well, at least you're not scared of me.
Daxter: I am……
Inu65: well, be nice and don't flame. It's my first Jak fic. Same with CTC.
If you really wanna find out my name, do an online search. There will be some Japanese usage and I will stick a little glossary at the end. every time there will be a Japanese word in the fic, I will stick a number by it so you can easily find the word in the glossary, ok? I'm nice.
CTC: DAMERU!!!
Inu65: by the way, Unreal Tournament is a computer game that I totally rock at!! There will be some moments that we will used the names of the guns. If ya wanna know what they're like, we just might give a brief explanation of them at the end. Maybe. If we feel like it. Well, review please!! And be nice!! Darker Side of the Moon and Fallen From Nowhere, OUT!!