This was my Wonkyward contest entry. Thank you to the ladies who worked so hard on the contest. Thank you Jaime Arkins for the nod and the amazing banner.
Beta'd by Kitchmill
Your Song
Edward's body slumped more heavily on Bella, his semi-conscious ramblings quieting. With a pat on his head, Bella sighed and said, "I know. I know." This was typical behavior for Edward, and she both loved and hated it.
Once again she tried to move his heavy head from her shoulder in an attempt to lay him down on the sofa, but to no avail. Instead, he made a cute little growling noise and clung to her more tightly, if that was possible.
In defeat, she laid her head on the back of the sofa, closing her eyes and hoping to get some rest before her early morning rehearsal.
The alarm on her phone chimed way too soon. Bella's attempt to reach it to silence the annoying sound was futile. The heavy weight on her body was unmoving. She huffed in frustration, slowly opening her bleary eyes to glance at the offending presence, only to grin at what she saw. Although he was an annoyance, she couldn't help but smile at the sight of him sprawled across her body, on her body, a position they obviously moved into during their short sleep together on the sofa.
The wet drool spot on her shirt evidence of his peaceful sleep, his hand cupping her left breast evidence of his comfort level with her, him being there at all, evidence of her inability to set boundaries with him...again.
"Edward," she whispered, knowing full well that a whisper was not going to rouse him. "Edward." More volume. The tenth time she had said his name and shaken him, she was mere seconds away from slapping his handsome face when he finally began to respond by smacking his lips and wiping the drool from his creased cheek.
When he lifted his head and opened the small slits of his eyes, Bella tried not to smile at his cute, rumpled face and chaotic hair. She needed to remember that she was annoyed with him, as she was every time he crashed at her place after a drunken night out with the boys flirting with...anyone with tits. Doing lord knows what with these "girls" before coming to her with his self indulgent woes. The ridiculous woes of a handsome, talented, single man. For some reason, Bella indulged him each and every time, and once again she neglected her own…responsibilities, the alert on her phone glaring evidence of said responsibility.
"You missed a call," he rasped, his voice thick with sleep and alcohol. They both stared at her phone, just out of their reach. Although he wasn't holding her literally, his presence made it impossible for her to reach out for the phone, for the messenger. This was becoming more and more the case, and it freaked her out.
"Yeah," she finally responded. "He's going to be pissed."
"Fuck him," Edward said, sitting up and stretching his arms over his head. "You're too good for him anyway."
Although she didn't want to watch him, look at the exposed skin peeking from under his raised shirt, or wonder about the trail of hair at his navel...she did anyway. It was almost out of her control. Edward was a gorgeous man, tall, lean, angled jaw, bright blue-green eyes, charismatic, intelligent, with a voice that made women swoon—what woman wouldn't look if she had the chance? Those swoony women would be surprised to know the real Edward, the guy who couldn't match his socks or zip the zipper on his pants regularly. Bella, however, found this endearing.
Although Bella wanted to argue with him about Riley, defend their relationship, she didn't, because she had tried before with no luck. Besides, part of her agreed with him. Things with Riley were not good, and hadn't been since she had left to rehearse for the tour. They'd been together for years, and the hectic long distance thing had always worked for them...until now. Now he was possessive and jealous and Bella was just...over it. Unlike Riley, she had always known their relationship was not forever, but it had been comfortable, safe. Not so much anymore. He had cheated on her...repeatedly. She always took him back because—well now she was coming to realize that she always took him back because his infidelity didn't really bother her. This revelation needed to be addressed with him, but not over the phone or long distance. She wanted to end things with him, but the right way. They owed it to each other, and she hoped they could remain friends; after all, they had been through a lot together.
Bella stood, doing a stretch of her own that caught Edward's full attention. Out of the corner of her eye she could have sworn she saw him adjust himself in his jeans. "I'm going to get in the shower."
"Me too." Edward quickly stood, nearly tripping over his feet as he tried to follow her in the direction of the bathroom.
"Alone," Bella said over her shoulder, causing Edward to pout and change his direction. She could have sworn she heard him say something like "not for long" before the door closed behind him and he headed back to his own hotel room.
"Have you talked to Riley today?" Rose asked in a not-so-friendly tone. Rose, who had been friends with Riley first, introduced Bella and Riley. At times Rose's friendship with Riley bordered on unhealthy and Bella could swear Rose had a lingering thing for him, that was until Edward came along. Now her affections had shifted to Edward, which caused Rose to be snarky and nosey in every aspect of Bella's life. Bella tried to have a friendly relationship with Rose, but it almost seemed more like a "keep your friends close but your enemies closer" thing most of the time.
"I'll call him later when I have more time," Bella said, turning her focus to tuning her already tuned guitar.
"You better," Rose mumbled, also turning her attention to her bass.
The air around them was tense as they fiddled with their instruments. With Esme's leadership role and Alice's bubbly personality, the tension was broken the moment the other band members arrived, and before long they were all laughing and rehearsing their own music and jamming cover songs they loved to do.
"Edward. It's tree pose. Just stand there with one leg up, tighten your core...suck in your stomach," Mike, the yoga instructor, reiterated with an impatient tone.
Bella was having difficulty holding her own tree pose because she was laughing at Edward's inability to perform the simplest ones. He looked like the scarecrow from The Wizard of Oz, his limp limbs going in every direction. It was a running joke among them, and all who knew Edward knew that anything physical was not his thing. It started the first day with Mike when Edward had to be taught how to stand correctly, and that posed to be a difficult lesson. Still, he could make the simplest tasks look difficult and awkward. Luckily he could laugh at himself, which made it all the more fun to watch.
"Damn, Edward. You suck at this. You buy drinks tonight, dude. That shit is too funny," Emmett said loudly, clapping Edward on the back when they finished with their daily yoga session.
Edward laughed, throwing his arm over Bella's petite, damp shoulders, pushing her long brown ponytail out of the way. "If this yoga shit wasn't so important to you, and you didn't look so good is these clothes," he said checking out her firm ass, "I wouldn't be doing it. It's hard."
"It's good for all of us, Edward. You'll get it...eventually," she teased. Doing yoga every day helped keep Bella even and focused. When she had suggested bringing her instructor on tour for group lessons, everyone jump at the idea...except Edward. He was outvoted, and now he served to entertain and distract them each and every morning with his lack of coordination.
It was after midnight and, although slightly disappointed, Bella had come to the conclusion that Edward was not coming by tonight. The realization that he could possibly be in another girl's apartment, another girl's bed, in another girl, made Bella a little queasy.
Her call earlier in the evening to Riley had been unpleasant to say the least. He was hostile and downright mean as he accused her once again of sleeping with Edward. She had slept with him, per se, but not in the way Riley was accusing her. It was innocent, but explaining that to Riley fell on deaf ears. He was jealous of Edward and loathed him, accusing him of trying to break them up. The truth was that Edward's comments and opinions didn't help Riley's situation, as he too didn't hold back his dislike of Riley, but the reality of the situation was that Edward's arguments were becoming more and more valid. The way Edward talked about Riley was exactly what he was or what he was quickly becoming—possessive and disrespectful.
On the other hand, although Edward was a natural flirt, with everyone, he had never made a move on Bella. They had quickly become close friends, which happened when you were rehearsing and touring together, but he had never tried to be with Bella, pressure her in any way to be unfaithful to Riley. He joked publicly that he was waiting for Bella to be single, or that he loved her, but that was just Edward, a giant flirt with no verbal filter.
Riley heard about everything Edward said and did from Rosalie, which made things so much worse. She was like a double agent. Originally she wanted Riley, so she watched Bella's every move closely and reported back to him, but now she wanted Edward...more, causing her to shed Edward in a bad light to Riley. Luckily, without even having to be told, Edward saw Rosalie for who she was and what she was trying to do, and he loathed her almost as much as he did Riley. However, it made for a tense working environment at times. Bella found herself being the peacemaker on more than one occasion.
On the other side of the US, Riley was fuming. He had had enough of this long distance relationship crap and not knowing what was going on with Bella and "one hit wonder Edward." He had no reason not to trust Bella—she'd been faithful until now—but something was different; he could feel Bella drifting away from him. Even with his good friend Rosalie there giving him information, it wasn't enough, and Riley could tell she was becoming less and less objective about Edward. Riley needed to see for himself.
"Edward, right foot forward, hips, one, two, three, four. One, two, three, four," the choreographer repeated. Bella stifled a giggle. His dancing was nearly as bad as his yoga poses. Bella could see him literally tripping over his too-big, wonky feet on stage.
"Your counting means nothing to me, Tanya. I need help dancing, not with numbers." Edward harrumphed. "Can't I just hide behind my guitar or piano or something?" he whined.
Bella could no longer hold back her laughter. Before she knew what was happening, she was over his shoulder being tickled, which he knew was her weakness.
"Stop, Edward. Stop. You're going to drop me. Uncle, uncle," she gasped while struggling to get out of his grasp.
"Say 'Edward is the best dancer.' Say 'Edward, I love you,'" he teased, his fingers unrelenting on her sensitive sides.
"Okay, okay. Edward's the best dancer. I love—" Bella started.
"Are you deaf? Or just dumb? When a girl says stop, you stop."
Edward and Bella both froze at the sound of his cold voice. They both craned their necks in Riley's direction.
"It's fine, Riley. We were just relieving some stress by joking around," Bella placated while smoothing her clothing after being placed back on her feet.
"That's not what it looked like to me. To me it looked like this guy is messing with my girlfriend...against her wishes."
"Well, that's not what it was," Bella said firmly, annoyed with Riley's accusations. She was annoyed, too, that he was unexpectedly here. "What are you doing here?"
"Can't I surprise my girl?" There was a possessive tone in his voice as he enveloped Bella in an almost too tight hug.
She hugged him back halfheartedly. "A surprise would be nice if we weren't working, Riley. This really isn't the best time."
"Working, pffft," he started.
"We are working," Tanya interrupted. "As a matter of fact, I'm only here for another half hour, so if you'll excuse us I have to get this one ready for his performance," she said, indicating toward Edward.
"Well, then you won't mind me stealing away my girl," he said, pulling Bella closer.
"As a matter of fact, I do. We need to clean up her choreography as well," Tanya said dismissively, turning her attention back to Edward. Bella shrugged out of Riley's grasp, mumbling that she'd see him later. Thoughts of Riley out of her head the second he left the room, the only thing that lingered was the finality. Seeing him now, here, next to Edward, solidified in Bella how over him she was. The difficult part would come later, when she would try to convince him of that.
Their rehearsal with Tanya ran long, because of Edward, of course, but Bella didn't mind. It helped keep her mind off of the inevitable—breaking up with Riley. The distraction and stalling were okay with her.
Bella and Edward entered the noisy pub together to find their friends and co-workers in full swing. The boys from Edward's band, Midnight Sun, were loudly laughing, drinking beer and playing pool, while the girls from Bella's were sitting around the table, every single one of them under Riley's spell, Rose sitting cozied up to him. He had a way about him that entranced women and had them following him like little lost puppies, and he took full advantage, he loved being the center of attention. Bella, although she found him attractive, had not ever been caught in his spell. She always hated that about him, finding it to be one of his worst qualities.
Bella paused before joining the group. Should she feel jealous of the female attention he garnered? Because she didn't; in fact, she thought of how good Riley and Rose looked together, and it wasn't the first time she sincerely thought that way.
Edward, who had disappeared, reappeared with a cold beer for each of them.
"Thanks." Bella clinked their bottles together. "Here goes nothing," she mumbled before joining the girls...and Riley.
Something was different about Bella since Riley's surprise ambush. Edward couldn't tell exactly what was going on, but he knew tonight would be a good night to be a fly on the wall in Bella's hotel room. He had a feeling that reunion sex was not what Bella had planned...Edward hoped.
Edward tried to enjoy his evening, but being in the same bar with Riley was too close. He kept his distance from the couple, out of self-preservation really. He didn't trust himself to say or do the right thing, especially with a few beers in his system. But he couldn't help glancing their direction, mainly to check on Bella. Each time her body language was stiff, and not once did he see her smile. All he wanted to do was sweep her away and make her smile and laugh. He had no doubt he could do it in a split second. That was how their relationship was: easy, fun, light. And her evening had been anything but those things.
Edward left the bar first, the girls in the bar getting too handsy as the liquor flowed. He went straight to his hotel room as he did most nights after having a few beers and shooting pool with the guys, unless he went to Bella's room, which he prefered. Her room smelled better and it was always neat and tidy, his not so much. Plus, being near Bella was all he wanted; he may have exaggerated on more than one occasion about how drunk he was. If she thought he was too drunk to know better or to remember, she let him touch her, snuggle up to her, even sleep next to her. He knew that was low and desperate, but Edward had to get what he could. After all, he was in love with a famous popstar and had been since before he'd even met her in person.
Edward's room was only a few down from Bella's, and just shy of holding a glass to the wall, he was listening to any and every sound that night. A few times he could have sworn he heard a shrill male voice, but that was it. When he finally fell asleep on the sofa at three a.m., he was at a complete loss on what may have happened between Bella and Riley.
For the first time since they'd been preparing for the tour, Bella missed the morning yoga class. Edward overhead Mike telling Alice that Bella wasn't feeling well. All Edward wanted to do was go and check on her, but it wasn't his place...it was her boyfriend's and he was there with her.
"Want to go and get breakfast?" Rose asked as they rolled up their mats. "You know, I don't think Bella's sick, just...preoccupied," she said with a laugh.
"No thanks. I'm not hungry." Rose's insinuations about Bella and Riley rid him of any interest in food.
Edward didn't see Bella at all that day, which hadn't happened since they'd been working together, and Edward didn't like it. Riley was there for less than twenty-four hours and everything had changed.
"Where did you go last night, dude?" Emmett asked during their yoga stretches the following day. Edward was so occupied looking out for Bella who was uncharacteristically late, he almost didn't notice Emmett talking to him.
Edward shrugged. "Tired."
"She must have been a live one if you're that tired," Emmett boasted loudly, right as Bella walked into the room.
Bella's eyes immediately sought Edward's. Taking him in, she noticed how tired he looked, bedhead and unshaven. Had he spent the night with someone...the whole night? She gave him a small smile and went to lay out her mat, but not in her usual spot next to Edward. Instead she went to the back corner, leaving distance between herself and everyone.
Guilt, she felt guilty and stupid. Was Riley right? Had she been leading Edward on? Had she chosen Edward to have his daily attention? Or did he feel indebted to her? She recalled the lengthy, sometimes heated conversation she had had with Riley.
"Bella, don't you see? You handpicked him. You insisted that it had to be him and his band on tour with you. You had to know he had a thing for you from the beginning. He's always flirting with you. He knows he owes you his career, so basically, he would do anything for you. He owes you."
"No, Riley, you're wrong. Edward and I are friends. We understand each other, coming up together in this music world, it's different...hard. We both just get it."
"Well, then you're blind, Bella. He's been here...for you…giving you anything and everything you need, and now you're different."
"Riley, he is my friend, nothing more. I may rely on him, but as a friend. We are not romantically involved and never have been."
"Pffft, Not one kiss? I don't believe it. Don't you see how he looks at you? Like you walk on water. He's setting himself up to be the perfect rebound guy for you, ready and waiting. I bet he even talks shit about me, doesn't he?"
"It doesn't matter how he looks at me or what his intentions are. I didn't cheat. But you are right about something. Things are different, we are different, I am different. For the first time since we met, Riley, this long distance thing, it's not working, we're not working. You are constantly angry and accusing me of cheating. There are no benefits right now for us to stay together, for either of us. You can't be happy feeling like this—I'm certainly not. I think we need to take a break until I come back home, then we can see how we feel."
"Are you serious? That's not for six more months. I come all this way to surprise you and you dump me for some boyband manwhore? Really? This is great. You are going to regret this, Bella...big time. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you. I knew you when you were nothing and I still liked you, loved you even. And now you're a big popstar and don't need me anymore. Mark my words, you'll come running back to me after he cheats on you and moves on to someone more popular or someone else who can help advance his career."
Coming back to the present moment, Bella tried repeatedly to focus on her yoga breathing and block out all that Riley had said, all the seeds of doubt he'd planted in her mind, but she couldn't. There were so many unanswered questions. Was Edward using her? Was she leading him on? Or was he so good to her because he felt he owed her? Deep down Bella thought no to all three of these questions, but right now she wasn't sure of anything, except that she needed to distance herself and focus on her music, on the tour, from here on out.
Days went by and Bella only talked to the others about work related things. She was pleasant and in the moment, but all business. When she knew Edward was being...well Edward and being his dorky self, she looked away. She missed their banter, his easy-going way, the way he made her smile and laugh by just being himself, but to maintain the distance she had created, she had to avoid seeing him like that. It hurt to do so, because she knew little by little she was ruining their friendship, but what Riley had said stayed with her. What she and Edward had had together was light, surface...maybe even superficial. He had plenty of girls to keep him occupied. He didn't need Bella. That's what she told herself to get through the day, but at the end of the day in her hotel room, she'd never been more lonely, more alone. She used this pain to start writing some new stuff, with a tone unlike anything else she'd ever written.
Edward was miserable. He'd overheard Rose say that Bella had broken up with Riley and that he had left the day after he got there. What he couldn't understand was why Bella was so cold, so distant. He thought they had been friends, good friends, that they understood each other. He didn't know if she was just really sad over the breakup or if he had done something to hurt her. He couldn't think of anything, but sometimes he said and did things without thinking beforehand, although those things he'd said and done had never bothered her before. He kept his distance as well, giving her the space and time she needed, but after a week or so, he ached to go to her and find out what she was thinking. But instead...each and every night that she sat alone in her hotel room Edward went out and drank...too much. He rehearsed, he did the dreaded yoga, he did everything that was expected of him, but it didn't mean as much to him without being able to share it with Bella, even if only as a friend.
"Come on, Bella, it's karaoke. You love karaoke," Alice coaxed.
"I'm not in the mood. I've been writing every night. I'm on a roll. It's not a good time to take a break," she protested.
"One night. It's one night."
"Come on, Bella," Esme added. "We miss you. We pack up and leave tomorrow. Who knows when we'll have downtime again? And the boys need to relax and have some fun; they are really nervous."
The thought of Edward being nervous was silly, because he was that good, but it was also understandable. It was, after all, their first big tour. Bella remembered embarking on her first tour and how terrified she was, and a night out with the bands, some camaraderie, was just what they needed.
"Okay, but I pick if and what I sing."
Alcohol flowed, everyone was feeling good, tension and nervousness from the impending tour set aside. Alice and Jasper, the bassist in Midnight Sun, butchered "Party in the U.S.A.," leaving everyone gasping for breath from laughing so much.
Edward took this opportunity to sidle up to Bella. She smelled like flowers and beer and Bella, a scent he'd never get enough of. It had been weeks since he'd been this close to her. Taking a deep breath and savoring the closeness, "Sing with me," he whispered in her ear, his warm breath fanning her ear and cheek, causing her to shudder.
She had worked so hard to build walls around herself, walls to keep Edward out, but having him this close, the warmth of his breath on her, remembering how her body hummed when he was this close, had the walls crumbling. She turned to look at him, their faces inches apart.
"Please," he said, sincerity in his voice, his eyes boring into hers.
All thoughts of avoiding Edward, the self talk about how distancing herself was best, fell away when he was this close.
She cleared her throat, hoping to also clear her mind before speaking. "Um, what would we sing?"
"Let me take care of that." He smirked, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. His touch gave her goose bumps.
He was only away from her side for a minute or two, but in those minutes she panicked and almost ran out of the bar, ran from Edward. He returned and, sitting close to her, the length of their thighs touching under the table, his presence settled her. "We're next," he said into her ear, causing another shudder through her body.
She tried to focus on the song Rose and Emmett were singing instead of how she felt with Edward this close. Emmett had been after Rose since the day they met, while she'd been after Edward. She played hard to get with Emmett, while loving his constant attention. Their old married couple banter was amusing. However, right now, it was obvious she was distracted by Edward's closeness to Bella, her clear voice faltering during an easy part of the song and her eyes never leaving them.
When it was their turn, Edward took Bella's hand firmly and led her to the front, not allowing her the chance to escape or change her mind. It wasn't stage fright that she was inflicted with, it was a feeling, like for some reason her agreeing to sing with Edward felt big...important. She kept telling herself it was only a song.
"Ready?" Edward said, handing her a microphone. Edward put his hand on her other hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
At first Bella didn't recognize the music. When she focused on the lyrics, she was stunned by the unusual song Edward had chosen. His deep, soulful voice started singing.
It's a little bit funny this feeling inside
I'm not one of those who can easily hide
I don't have much money but boy if I did
I'd buy a big house where we both could live
If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a travelling show
I know it's not much but it's the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one's for you
Bella watched him in awe; he sang with such passion, like he was trying to tell her something. Bella joined in at the chorus and they sang together, their voices blending perfectly.
And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world
Edward gave her hand another squeeze, bringing his microphone down to his lap. She understood his gesture and sang the second verse.
I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well a few of the verses well they've got me quite cross
But the sun's been quite kind while I wrote this song
It's for people like you that keep it turned on
So excuse me forgetting but these things I do
You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen
Her eyes never left his, his wide and shining as she sang. His voice joined hers for the chorus.
As the final note of the song faded, Bella panicked, her eyes burning from unshed tears. Why had that been so emotional? What did it mean? She knew she needed to get away, clear her head. It was all too much for her. Freeing her hand from Edward's, she ran.
She slid down onto the floor just inside her hotel room, eyes tightly closed, her head resting against the door. She had tried so hard to distance herself from Edward, and it had worked for a couple of weeks, but she had been miserable, and from the looks of him lately, so had he.
One night, one song, and she was back where she started, but worse. It felt like Edward had just poured his heart out to her through that song. For once she allowed herself to hope that was what he had done. So many thoughts, concerns, questions floated around in her head. But no matter what, the last thing she wanted was to lose Edward as a friend; she'd had a taste of that and didn't want to go there again.
A light knock on the door startled her. She hesitated, considering not opening it, or even checking to see who was on the other side. Although she hoped it was Edward, she knew if it was him and she opened the door, everything would change.
He knocked again, a faint "Bella, it's me, Edward" coming from the other side.
She relaxed at the sound of his voice, but that guilt she'd been carrying around since Riley left came creeping back. "Please, Bella, let me in. I need to talk to you."
She knew they needed to talk, if for nothing else than to get answers from him.
She opened the door slowly, the man she saw standing there very different than the happy-go-lucky guy from weeks before. His always messy hair looked manhandled, pulled and yanked in all different directions. His usually bright eyes red-rimmed and dull, dark shadows beneath them. His beard, long and unkempt, his clothing looked slept in, the buttons of his flannel buttoned unevenly.
"Hey," he said shyly, burying his hands deep into his front pockets.
"Hi." She cleared her throat. "Come in."
After Bella got them each some water, they settled on opposite ends of the sofa.
"So you and Riley broke up?"
"Yep." She nodded. "It was for the best."
"Are you sad? Upset?"
She shrugged. "No, not really. I just have a lot on my mind."
"Yeah, you haven't been yourself the last couple of weeks. I've been worried, but ya know, giving you your space and all that."
"Riley said some things that got me thinking and I've been trying to sort it all out."
"Anything you want to share?"
Bella knew it was now or never. He'd given her the perfect segway to get the answers she needed. "Do you feel like you owe me anything?"
Edward cocked his head. "Owe you?"
"You know, like feel indebted, need to repay me, whatever?"
"Um, no. I mean I'm grateful for this opportunity and I know you had a lot to do with it, but I don't feel like I owe you. It's what friends do, help each other."
"So, you're not just nice to me because I helped you?"
"What? No. Did he really tell you that? I'm nice to you because I like you, Bella."
"Have I led you on?"
"Led me on how?"
"Like, do I flirt with you and act like we're together or that I like you and then don't follow through?"
He laughed. "You had a boyfriend. I've known that all along. I never felt like you acted like you were going to give me any more than our close friendship. If anything, I overstepped at times. I really have tried to respect your relationship with Riley. Well, kind of." He shrugged, his cheeks pinkened remembering faking being drunk to be close to her. "I do have a confession to make."
Bella's stomach dropped at his words.
"Um, you know when I would come by your hotel room after hanging out with the guys?" Bella nodded, anxious to hear what was coming next. "Sometimes, I wasn't as drunk as I seemed."
"Huh? I don't understand."
"God, Bella. This is humiliating, but I feel like I have to tell you." He took a deep breath before spilling out. "IactedmoredrunkthanIwassoIcouldbeclosetoyou."
"You what? Talk slower, Edward," she said, getting frustrated.
"I sometimes would act more drunk than I was because when I was drunk you'd let me get close to you, you'd take care of me, even let me sleep here," he said, looking chagrined.
"You faked being drunk to get close to me," she repeated. "That's pretty low, Edward. You lied to me. You'd go out and be with all of those girls and come back to my place?" She got up and started pacing. She felt used and kind of gross.
"What do you mean be with all those girls? I haven't been with anyone...in months," he defended.
"Yeah right," she said with a disgusted sound, sitting back down on the sofa, a little closer to Edward.
"No, really. I haven't been with anyone in," he paused, "since I signed on for this tour."
"You mean to tell me that with all those girls throwing themselves at you, ready and willing to do anything and everything for you, you haven't been with anyone? Like nothing?"
He shook his head. "No, I mean I've kissed and felt up a few girls, but totally unwillingly."
She laughed. "Unwillingly?"
"Well, yeah. Sometimes they just jump on me, literally. The natural reaction is to grab them. Before I know it they're kissing me. I never kiss back." He shook his head vehemently, making a face.
"But you've got them coming back. Sometimes I see the same girls. I thought it's because they were satisfied customers."
He laughed out loud at that. "If they had been customers, they would have been very satisfied." He gave Bella a sexy smirk. "Really, I just flirt with them a little and act like what they want is not out of the question, but I never promise them anything. Sometimes I feel bad doing that, but we're an up and coming band and they are my demographic."
"But why? Why don't you go for it with them? You're young, handsome, single. There's nothing wrong with that."
"You think I'm handsome?" he whispered, moving closer to Bella.
She rolled her eyes, smiling. "Like you don't know you're handsome."
"It doesn't matter what I think." He inched closer. "It matters what you think...of me."
"Why?"
"Because you're all that matters."
She shook her head, still confused. "Why that song?"
He looked down. "Because it reminds me of you."
When he looked up she was staring at him, mouth open, his words not fully registering with her.
"Bella, I'm going to lay it all out for you, but you have to promise me, whatever I say, whatever you say, whatever happens, we remain friends. I don't want to lose you."
She nodded, not trusting her voice or words.
Looking down, he took her hands in his, playing with her fingers. "I feel a connection with you, Bella. Something I've never felt with anyone. I haven't been with anyone else, because since the day I met you, maybe even before that, you were all I wanted, all I want. I've waited, sometimes not so patiently for you to be single, unattached." He gave her hand a squeeze, looking up at her. "I'm in love with you."
Bella stared at their entwined fingers, his words repeating in her head, "I'm in love with you...all I want."
"Bella, say something...anything," Edward pleaded, her silence killing him.
"You love me?" she questioned, looking him in the eye. He smiled and nodded. "Wow. I mean I knew you liked me, maybe a little more than like, but love, I didn't expect…"
He silenced her by gently placing his hands on either side of her face and kissing her, lightly at first and then with all the pent up love and passion he had for her. Her mouth opened when his tongue touched her bottom lip, their tongues exploring. Their kisses felt new and exciting but comfortable and familiar, like they'd been kissing for years.
She pulled away first, breathless and dizzy. "Wow."
"Good wow, or bad wow?" Edward asked, his fingers playing with the ends of her long brown hair.
"Um, good. Unexpected, but good." She smiled. All the guilt and apprehension she felt earlier was gone. In it's place was anticipation, excitement.
"How do you feel about what I said?" he asked timidly.
"Well, it's a lot to take in. One minute I'm questioning your motives for being my friend, the next you're kissing me." She laughed. "I mean, I've known from the first time I met you that there was something special about you. I attributed it to your talent, charisma and charm. I have felt a connection between us, but I assumed it was just us being in this crazy situation together, understanding each other."
"Bella, if you're not ready to pursue this, us, I understand and I'll wait. I've waited this long," he whispered bringing, his lips to her for few quick, light kisses.
Having him this close was doing things to her that she had never remembered happening. She literally felt dizzy from his kisses, even chast ones. Could they be more than friends? Was that ridiculous and stupid to even consider given they are about to go on a six-month concert tour together? Or could it be, could he be the best thing that ever happened to her?
"I don't know, Edward." She took a deep breath. "What I do know is that I hate all those skanks throwing themselves at you. And I liked it when you'd come to my hotel room late at night and I like being with you. You make me laugh and think and feel normal in all this craziness."
"So, you're saying that you like me too?" He smirked, pulling her into his lap, her knees on either side of his legs.
"Yeah, I do, but I need to think about how to do this, how to maintain being professional, do our job. Oh my god, what if it doesn't work out, what if—"
Again he silenced her with his lips on hers. "We will figure this out...together," he said against her lips. "Please don't freak out on me."
She melted into him, her head resting on his shoulder. For a man who looked like a bum that hasn't showered in days, he smelled good, manly. While smelling him, her nose grazed his neck and earlobe. The temptation to kiss him there was too much. When her lips and tongue touched the sensitive skin of his neck, he groaned and pulled her closer.
"God, Bella. You have no idea how many times I've dreamt about having you this close, being able to kiss you, touch you."
"Hmm," she said, continuing to lave his neck and face, all the way to his lips. It was her turn to grab his face and take control, her hands grabbing his hair as she kissed him, pulling gently. He grunted when she slid forward, her hot center over his cock, big and hard. She did it again eliciting the same response, except this time he grabbed her hips and guided her.
Having Bella fully clothed grinding on his lap was heaven, and more than he ever expected, but it wasn't enough. Now that he had her, he wanted all of her. He lifted the sides of her shirt, breaking their kiss to pull it over her head. "You're so beautiful." He admired her while unhooking and removing her bra. He cupped her firm, soft tits—a perfect handful. The pink nipples pointing at him begged for attention. "So beautiful," he repeated as he took one of her taut nipples in his mouth. It was her turn to groan and press down harder on him. It felt so good he could barely focus on her tits.
When he couldn't take any more, he grabbed her hips and slid her off his aching cock before it burst.
"You okay?" she asked, breathless from their kisses.
"Yeah." He smiled. "Too okay. Just give me a minute to calm down."
She giggled in understanding. The thought of him needy and wanting...her, made her squirm on his lap. He raised his brows knowingly.
"Um, want to move to the bed?"
Before she finished the question he was standing with her, his hands supporting her ass, her legs wrapped around his back and her hands behind his neck. He set her down to stand in front of the bed. Going for the button of her jeans, she stopped him.
"Not fair. I want to see you too," she insisted, lifting his shirt over his head.
He was an adonis, lean muscles, perfectly sculpted but not overly so. Her hands roamed his shoulders and chest, and when she grazed his nipples he hissed. She leaned in and kissed in the center of his chest as her hands traveled to the top of his jeans, making quick work of the button and zipper and sliding them down his legs and off his feet. She could see the outline of his hard cock through his boxer briefs, and she traced it with a too light touch. He leaned into her hand, wanting more. When her hand dipped under the waistband and touched the tip of his weeping cock, he hissed louder, this time slumping against her. Her touch, everything she did, was driving him mad.
"Your turn," he panted. He slowly removed her jeans, helping her step out of them, his hands gently rubbing higher and higher up her legs. She had to put her hands on his shoulders, fearing her trembling legs would not hold her up. When his hands reached her upper thighs, she thought she may burst into flames from the heat and burning need she had for him. Everywhere he touched her left her burning, tingling, wanting.
He could feel her heat, smell her, it was intoxicating. He wanted nothing more than to bury himself in her, claim her. When his hands got close to her center, she let out a needy whimper that went straight to his cock. He rubbed himself through his briefs trying to relieve some of the pressure.
"Oh, god. That is so hot," she moaned watching his hand move on himself.
"You make me so hard, it's painful," he said unapologetically.
"We can't have that," she said, coaxing to him lie down on the bed. She straddled him, her wet, cloth-covered center hovering right over his. With her hands on either side of his head, they kissed. His hands roamed her body, tweaking her nipples, and when he slipped a finger inside her panties, her hips rotated, seeking friction. Pulling her panties to the side, he worked her slowly, with barely there touches.
"You're killing me," she mewed, trying to ride his hand.
"Be patient," he teased, applying a little more pressure.
She was worked up, tittering on the edge of ecstasy. When he finally slipped two fingers inside her and pumped, his thumb hitting her clit rhythmically, she shattered instantly, eyes closed, head thrown back, his name and some nonsensical words falling from her lips.
He once again had to rub his aching cock, fighting the urge to come along with her, the sight of her orgasming at his hands almost too much to bear.
When she opened her eyes and saw him touching himself again, her eyes darkened with lust and want. She put her hand on top of his and rubbed along with him. "You're so big and hard," she said with awe.
He smiled. All he had wanted for months was for Bella to see him, to look at him, like she was right now...with want, desire.
"I want you inside me," she said, helping him remove his briefs. He wanted nothing more than to do exactly that.
Sheathed in a condom, he hovered above her, taking a moment to really appreciate having her. Her brown hair fanned on the white pillow, her brown eyes, hooded, her fair skin, lightly dotted with freckles in the sunkissed areas. She was amazing, naturally beautiful. He shook his head in wonder.
"What?" she asked, caressing the side of his face.
He leaned into her touch, closing his eyes. "I'm just...this is so surreal. You are unreal," he confessed, rubbing the tip of his cock through her wetness. When he pushed inside her, they both let out a moaning breath. He stilled deep inside her, both to regain control but also to savor this moment.
Her legs came up and wrapped around his back, opening her up to him, the angle deeper.
He began moving in and out, slow and deep at first. She met him with every thrust.
"I want to feel you come around my cock," he panted. "Let me see you touch yourself."
Her watched her slide her hand between their bodies and work her clit, her eyes closing with pleasure. He had to bite his lip not to come; it was the most erotic thing he'd ever seen or done. He thrusted harder, angling upward. The noises she was making were spurring his efforts. His cock harder than it had ever been, his balls tight to his body, tingled with the signs of his impending release.
"Oh, Edward," she cried, her walls fluttering and squeezing his cock.
"Bella," he chanted, her body pulling his orgasm from him so strongly that he saw spots.
He collapsed on top of her, sweaty, tired and sated. Her hand rubbed his scalp while their breathing evened out.
"Edward," she said, thinking he may have fallen asleep on top of her.
"Huh," he mumbled, giving her a lazy smile.
"You're kind of squishing me."
"Oh, sorry," he said, hopping off of the bed to dispose of the condom. Moving toward the bathroom, his foot got caught in the strewn clothes, tripping him up so he nearly landed on all fours the floor, naked ass on display.
Bella giggled, making him laugh too. Within seconds he was back in the bed snuggled up to her, a possessive leg thrown over hers.
"I hope this is the beginning of something amazing between us," he declared. "I hope you give us a chance."
She nodded. "I want to try." She wiggled until she found a comfortable position, her wiggling awakening Edward's cock. Pressed against her thigh, she could feel him long and hard.
"You've awakened a beast, Bella. I want you again." When he slid into her this time, it was slow and sensual. Their love making sweet, savoring, swallowing each other's moans when they came together.
Lying, limbs entwined, Bella realized that clumsy, wonky Edward was not so uncoordinated in bed. In fact, he made love with purpose and grace, something that didn't carry over to daily life, especially not in his dancing and yoga. Bella smiled. She loved the thought that she knew something about Edward that no one else knew. And that together they were something special.
A/N
Hope you enjoyed it :)