my version of the next book. please comment. i would also like to say that i own no rights to the vampire diaries they are the product of lj smiths brilliant imagination. i would also like to say that i dont care whether she was fired (YES, FIRED!) for writing too much Delena stuff, in my opinion they always have and always will belong to her. (GO DELENA).

SORRY ABOUT ANY SPELLING MISTAKES IT WAS A SPUR OF THE MOMENT THING

Dear diary Its very strange, when I wake up I find it so hard to remember where I am ,or even who I am. Everything is back to normal or rather everything is how it was ten months ago. Well, not quite. I'm still trying to come to terms with the fact that he's not coming back. He's never going to… do anything ever again. What would I give to see him stroll in now. Everything would be perfect then but it's impossible. I know we've only just got back but I don't think I'll ever feel the same. I still have Stefan though and for that I am grateful and for the fact that the rest of us are still alive. Despite this though, I would give my life if it meant that he would live. Because at this moment half my heart is torn; the half that belonged… belongs to him. To Damon.

Elena didn't realise she was crying until tears started to fall onto the page. Drip. Drip. Almost immediately she felt arms fold around her in a comforting embrace. She buried her face in Stefan's shirt clinging to him, trying to hold herself together. While he whispered soothing words in her ear and in her mind. 'I'm sorry, I have to stop crying all the time, I never used to.' Elena apologises when her tears had subsided, Stefan made no reply. 'it must be a hundred times worse for you, but I can't seem to help myself. Even his name…' Elena choked back another round of sobs. 'Shhh its alright love. I know.'

they sat together for a long time, Elena with her face buries in his chest and Stefan with his arms around her, holding her tightly.

Stefan?

Yes

Where do you think he is? The celestial court said that they couldn't find vampire souls once the vampire died because they were already gone, but where could they go?

I don't know love, I wish I did. Maybe they were right. That we lose our souls the first time we die then we just. Go out.

'No!' Elena shouted. Stefan reminded her of the presence of her sleeping relatives and she once again reverted to telepathy.

I don't believe that for a second and neither should you. When I died and became a spirit. My entire essence was my soul. I had no physical body but I could appear how ever I or anyone else wanted me to look

She sent him an image of a pile of bones, via the link and Stefan shuddered at the memory

But whatever form I was in , as you told Klaus. I was still me. My body on earth was…is just my shell. My soul is my identity. Without my soul inside a body there is nothing for to tell the body to function. Which is how I know you and other vampires have souls-not to mention the fact that I've been there and so did…so did Damon. He became human again, I mean. I wonder where a vampires soul goes when its body dies, not the same place as humans, obviously. But it must go somewhere.

Elena cut off the link and puzzled it over. Suddenly, the alarm went off , bringing her thoughts back to the present world and making her jump. Stefan of course Stefan wasn't effected and leant over to cut off its chimes before the thought had crossed her mind.

'my alarms still set for school? Huh, it seems so strange that I never graduated and never will. But everyone will remember it. Another thought crossed the front of her mind. 'I wonder what the date is?' she mused.

'July 13th' Stefan answered instantaneously. Elena looked at him quizzically.

'I made a point to find out when we got back.' he explained before adding in a lower voice. 'And today would have been Damon's birthday.'

They both sat in silence, for there was nothing to say. There way a muffled noise from down the hall. 'Margaret's awake. I should go.' he stood up 'the boarding house, ten o'clock' I'll see you there' Elena said

and I love you.

She sent after him as he dropped from the sill onto the path below.

I love you too

He sent in reply with a single glace back at the house before getting in his car(the guardians had even got his car back) and driving off. Leaving Elena wondering about the fate of her own, shiny, red Ferrari.