"We're okay with that?" O'Neill asked, feigning like it was no big deal.

"Yes, Sir." Every word felt like a stab to the heart. Finally, she knew beyond a doubt...And they were going to leave it behind. Probably forever. But it was what had to be done.

O'Neill sighed. It had been a long day, and one of the hardest.

He had figured Carter had felt the same for a while...But now he knew. For sure. And they had to leave it all behind.

"Or do we...?" He asked himself, starting up his black F-150.

They could keep a secret. That was obvious with their jobs. So...Why couldn't they give them a chance...But keep it secret?

O'Neill nodded to himself as he left the complex and began driving. They had all been sent home for rest, so O'Neill knew where to find Carter, at home, where she almost never was.

Eventually he found himself on the street where Carter's house was and he sighed, needing to do this and being against it all at once.

"Sir...None of this has to leave the room."

O'Neill hit his palm against the steering wheel. Why had she given him that option? Didn't she know how much of a coward he was? Or how he knew exactly how much the regulations meant to her?

But he had still agreed, though he wished he hadn't. But now...He had a chance. Maybe not a very good one...But a chance.

Because he knew...And she knew...And now...He had to try.

O'Neill undid his seat belt and took a slow breath as he opened the door to his truck. He slowly walked towards Carter's door, breathing in and out slowly in order to not leap for his car and drive away as fast as possible. He HAD to do this.

As he got closer, he could see Carter moving around in her kitchen, probably tidying up the non-existent clutter, needing to keep moving. It made him smile how she still had the same habits.

He took another deep breath as he considered the door in front of him. It had little scratches or anything, which made sense since Carter was barely there. There was nothing special or out of the ordinary about it...But now it scared him...What if he was wrong? Or what if the regulations really meant more to her than he did? Or what if-

His thought was cut off as Carter opened the door, carrying a bag of recycling.

"Sir," she said in shock.

"Carter," O'Neill replied calmly.

"Wha-What are you doing here?" Carter asked, lowering the bag onto the porch.

"May I come inside?"

Carter nodded. "Of course." She motioned for him to come in and he followed. "You, uh, want a beer?"

O'Neill shrugged and followed her into the kitchen. "Sure."

Carter nodded and grabbed two beers. She popped the tops and gave one to her CO.

"With respect, sir...What are you doing here?" She took a swig of her beer. She thought she might need the alcohol for tonight.

Jack took his own swig of his beer and sighed. "Samantha."

Carter nearly choked on her beer at the use of her full name. "S-Sir?" she managed to stutter out.

O'Neill sighed again and looked down at his beer. "Sam. Call me Jack. We're off-duty. Hell, we're on leave."

Carter nodded very slowly and had a large gulp of the beer. She was right about needing the alcohol. "Okay...Jack...What are you doing here?"

He looked up at her, almost losing himself in those blue crystals. "I can't."

"Can't what, sir?" Carter asked, feeling butterflies. She was pretty sure she knew what he was talking about.

He gave her a pointed look and she fixed her slip.

"Sorry...Jack. Old habits." She shrugged and drank more of her beer.

"I wasn't pointing that out..." He sighed and looked back down at his beer. "You know what I'm talking about."

Carter sighed and finished off her beer. She took it over to the sink and put it on the side. Then she leaned over the sink, her hands holding tight as if she was afraid of she let go, she would let go of her emotions too.

"Yes...I do," she said very softly.

There was a long silence as O'Neill finished his beer. "Well...?"

Carter sighed and turned away from him. "It's against the regulations."

O'Neill slammed his fist down on the table and Carter jumped. "Dammit, Carter! Screw the regs!"

"I...I can't, sir."

O'Neill shook his head and looked up at his second-in-command. "Can't...Or won't, Carter?"

"I...I can't, sir," she stuttered.

O'Neill shook his head again and stood. He walked over to the sink and emptied out his beer, then placed it on the counter, hovering very close to the Major. "Thank you for the beer, Carter. Good night."

He turned and went to the door, getting ready to leave. He grabbed his coat off the coat rack and put his hand on the doorknob to leave. He turned and shook his head. "You know, Carter, maybe it's not me that's the problem here. Let's face it, I'm not that complex."

Carter's breath caught in her throat and she reached forward, her hand outstretched to him. "Jack," she whispered in pain.

Her pain clenched at O'Neill's heart, but she didn't want this, so why should he even bother?

"Good-bye, Sam," he said darkly and left, slamming the door behind him..

The sound shook Carter to the very core, and she ached to go back. To tell him how she would give up her career for him. But it was too late.

Carter lowered to the floor, her hands tangled in her hair and her back against the cupboard. She refused to cry, though she wanted to. She had to be strong...She had to.

Carter took a few deep breaths, going from shakiness to slow, steady breaths. And she knew she would be okay. So she stood, grabbing the two empty beer bottles and heading outside to get rid of her recycling, as she had planned earlier. She had to keep going.