Title: Warmth of The Sun.
Disclaimer: The sun would rise in the west if I owned saiyuki.
--- It's a one-shot SanzoxGoku fic, with bits of GojyoxHakkai. Mainly Goku's POV.
************************************************************************
Warmth of The Sun.
Here we are, the four of us in a jeep, on the hilltop watching the sunset. Hakkai has driven us for quite long; I heard we're supposed to pass this hill to reach to the next village. When we reached the hilltop, the sun was just about set, so Hakkai suggested that we take a short break while enjoying the sunset.
We always saw the sunset mainly because we're traveling to the west, as Sanzo always say to us. I watched the beautiful view before me with awe. The sunset was beautiful, but I dislike it. In fact, I hated it some times. Because when the sun is gone, darkness will fall. I hate that.
Soon Sanzo told us to move on, so that we could reach the next village hopefully before midnight. We left the sun to set and Hakkai drove us down the hill. Gojyo and I argued over the snack supplies but Sanzo silenced us with a click of his gun. Man, he sure doesn't have patience.
It was getting darker and darker at the moment and the more I was wishing that we would reach the inn sooner. I loathed darkness. But I felt secured and all right because Sanzo was sitting just in front of me. Somehow, seeing Sanzo I felt much safer and comforted even though he has awful mood swings at times.
Clouds covered the moon, making it darker than ever, and the wind blew.
"Brrr….. The wind sure is chilly tonight," Gojyo stated while getting himself a blanket. "Hakkai, how long more until the next inn?" he wailed.
"Maa maa, it'll be at least 2 more hours before we get to the inn at the bottom of this hill. So you two be good boys and be patient, okay?" Hakkai said, while flashing us one of his usual smiles.
"Hai…." Both Gojyo and me answered.
"Bakayarus…." I heard Sanzo grumble.
Gojyo got bored again and decided to provoke me by snatching my blanket. "A saru won't be needing a blanket!" he yelled while covering himself with my blanket as well as his.
"Take it." I said to him suddenly, "and I'm not a saru." With that I turned away.
Everyone was dumbfounded especially Gojyo, his mouth was hanging wide open. Maybe he expected me to snatch back my blanket and start fighting with him. Well, I didn't feel like doing it.
"A-are you sure?" Gojyo asked in disbelieve. Everyone had a blanket on, including Hakkai who was driving. "I don't need it." I said calmly.
The wind howled and blew strongly this time, and Gojyo was already chattering. But strangely enough, I don't feel cold at all. Well, maybe just a little bit but I doubt it's as bad as Gojyo.
"Goku, you'll catch a cold if you don't warm yourself up," Hakkai pointed out gently. "Gojyo, return Goku his blanket."
"Okay, okay," Gojyo said. If there's anyone who can order Gojyo around, it has got to be Hakkai. I noticed that Gojyo never goes against Hakkai. Wonder why?
"Here, saru. Take it." Gojyo flunk the blanket at me.
"I'm fine, I don't want a blanket." I firmly said. "Take it, I don't want to sit with a frozen ero kappa in a jeep." I threw the blanket back at him.
This time, I can feel that everyone is downright speechless. What so surprising anyway? I just didn't want a blanket!
"Oi, saru. Are you sick?" Gojyo asked with a tone of concern. "I don't wanna sit with a sick saru either."
"Goku, are you sure you're okay?" Hakkai inquired with a worried tone.
I even saw Sanzo glancing at me once in a while.
"Don't worry. I'm okay!" I insisted, assuring all of them.
It feels nice to have people to care about you, even the annoying ero kappa. I saw Gojyo and Hakkai and Sanzo exchanging glances, then they looked at me but I pretend to stare away.
I hated hot weather. But I hated the cold even more. This coldness, it brings back unwanted memories, it reminds me of the 500 years I spent locked up in the mountain with nothing. Nothing but darkness, loneliness and coldness.
I was there for half a century, bound by chains made of iron and steel, unable to move freely. These chains are always cold. They're heavy. They hurt me at times. I remembered how much I've been longing to be rid of them before. Because of them, I'm somewhat used to the cold now.
When I was in the mountain prison, the sun rised and set, the moon appeared and faded countless times. I could see the sun from my cave. But I could never feel its warmth. Not even when it's shining down on me.
If this were deep underground, I would have never wished for the sun.
Another reason why I detested the coldness is because it reminded me of my friend. My one and only friend when I was locked up in the mountain. My yellow bird friend who understood my pain, who always cheered me up, and always kept me company. Until one day, the coldness claimed it from me.
I saw its cold and lifeless form right in front of my cave. I tried so hard to reach it. But I failed. I was forced to watch it rot away and turn into dust right before me. I was in despair and pain.
Then, he came along. He, my sun stretched out his hands to me. The chains that have bound me for so long melted away into dust. He freed me. It was Sanzo.
He gave me a world brighter than the sun. He gave me freedom.
Freedom was definitely much better than being all locked up. But I still could not feel warmth from the sun.
I kept quiet all the way in the journey down the hill. Lost in my own thoughts. I know the ero kappa tried to make me bicker with him for a few times. I just ignored him.
After what it seems like ages, we finally reached the inn at the bottom of the hill. We went in for a meal first. Usually, I would gladly take the menu and order everything available there. But this time, I didn't feel like it. So I let Hakkai do the ordering.
During the meal time, I didn't felt much like eating either. But I finished my portion so that I won't worry the others, especially Hakkai. He'd think something's wrong with me and question me till no end.
I didn't even make a sound when Gojyo stole 3 of my dumplings. Guess that really ticked them off. Cause I saw Hakkai whispering something at Goyjo, then at Sanzo with a concerned look. But I was so tired from thinking and reminiscing, it didn't bother me much. I just felt like resting my head.
After eating, Sanzo went up to the innkeeper and called for 2 rooms. The innkeeper said they were available and gave us the keys. I move automatically with Goyjo to supposedly our room. But suddenly Gojyo grabbed Hakkai's arm.
"C'mon, I'm cold. I want you to warm me up." He said while winking and pulling Hakkai to the nearest room.
"Yare yare….. ," Hakkai smiled while allowing himself to be dragged by Goyjo. That leaves me and Sanzo.
"I swear I'll kill those two horny idiots." I heard Sanzo muttered. "Come, saru, or I'll leave you here."
I obediently followed my master's orders. I followed him to our room. Thank god there were two beds in the room! I wouldn't wanna sleep on the floor again after 3 nights of camping out.
I took my bed, the one near the window and sat. I looked out the window. It was dark outside, with nothing in sight. Then he spoke.
"Oi, saru."
His commanding voice pierced my heart. I knew what was coming next.
"What's wrong with you?"
"I'm fine," I answered, not turning around and looking at him. Then I heard a soft click.
"You're gonna tell me what the fuck is wrong or I'll shoot." He said dangerously.
Sanzo has the weirdest way of showing concern. I wouldn't mind it if he shoots. Dying in Sanzo's hands was much better than other ways. But I knew better than to test his patience.
"If you are referring at the meal time, I just didn't felt like eating." I answered truthfully.
"Why?" he asked again, his voice now softer.
After thinking for a moment, "……the coldness." I answered simply.
"What?" he asked for a clearer explanation.
"The coldness outside, reminded me of unwanted things, unwanted memories. It reminded me of the time I was locked up in that horrid mountain. My sufferings…. I was there for 500 years without water, food, or blanket. Without companion..." I struggled to find the right words tell Sanzo.
"……….." I could feel him lowering his gun.
"I found no warmth or comfort." I ended it simply. Then I turned and forced a smile at him. "If there's nothing more, I'll sleep now. Good night."
I wanted to lie down and sleep, but before I could do so, I found myself in the arms of Sanzo. He had his arms around me, holding me tightly.
"Sanzo..?" I was confused. The last I know Sanzo wanted to be anywhere but near me.
"Just shut up, bakasaru." He whispered softly. I felt his hot breath near my ear.
He cupped my chin gently and looked at me in the eye. His violet orbs gazing into mine, as though trying to tell me it's okay. Then he kissed me. His soft delicate ones brushing against mine. I was more than glad to return his kiss.
He continued embracing me, never letting go. I returned his embrace too. I wrap my arms around his neck, never wanting to let go. I rested my head against his broad chest. Sleep soon engulfed me.
Sanzo must've held me all night long because when I woke up, I found myself lying in the bed with him, myself still in his arms. He was still asleep. I didn't want to wake him up. So I just lay quietly in his embrace, snuggling up to his warm chest, wishing that dawn wouldn't come so soon.
In his cuddle, I felt so peaceful. All the bad memories washed away. I felt loved. I felt comfort. I felt the true warmth of the sun. My sun of course.
OWARI
************************************************************************
On3: My 1st saiyuki fic. Not very clear I suppose. Views? Much welcomed. =)