Okay, okay, I DON'T OWN PERSONA 3 HAH.

That was our disclaimer by the way. Group effort. Not to be taken seriously, under any circumstances. The username says it all.

Eventually this will probably be spoilerful if we do continue it.

Sincerely,

An Ass2Nin and an Assassin

Harry Potter and the Dark Hour

Persona 3 FES

It all started (Dun dun DUN) during the welcoming ceremony. Which, might I add, was boring. Epically boring.

Anyways.

I'm sure there must have been a reason Harry Potter sat beside me. Possibly, at least, I mean he did ignore me. There was an orange haired fellow on the other side of him, mind you, so maybe that was it. Or maybe it wasn't Harry Potter at all?

Before I could address the brown haired boy, with the ugly round glasses, and ridiculously shaped scar - it looked self-inflicted; actually it looked more like a burn, but that's not the point here. The point was… … I'm not sure. But! There was another boy sitting behind me, highly unremarkable, plain, who decided that it was in his best interest to bother me. Which it wasn't. He wasn't worthy of my attention, I rather wished I was at home by this point.

Reading through my yaoi, full of hot guys and s—Wait, wait, let's get back to the kid bothering me.

"Pst. Hey. I saw you walking to school with Yukari Takeba, Do you know if she has a boyfriend?"

Now, if you know anything about Yukari, you'll know this kid has to be a moron for not noticing.

"Pfft. Please. Boyfriend? She'll never have one of those."

The look of confusion was intense enough to make babies cry, "huh? What do you mean?"

"She's obviously a lesbian."

"W-what!? Wait, how well do you know her?!"

"Long eno—" Unfortunately our enlightening conversation was broken up by some other male teacher. Don't know who, I did just transfer here after all.

"I hear talking. Sounds like it's someone in Mrs. Toriumi's class!"

Thus the other student shut up. Leaving me to go back to my thoughts.

Why was Harry Potter beside me? I was under the impression that he was a fictional character. But perhaps not, because he was right here, after all. Or maybe I was hallucinating, I wouldn't be surprised after last night. No. No, not the part of last night where I caught Yukari peeking into my room. I am going to start sleeping with a shirt on though. No, I mean the part where everything went green, and it was like I was walking through a… a coffin shop or something.

There was blood too. Puddles. But they smelt suspicious of ketchup. Come to think of it… The air was heavily laden with the sweet smell of frying grease… The trademark smell of French fries.

Moving on.

Now we're in class. Or after class rather, I can't remember if the assembly took up all that time, or if I just slept through class. No matter.

I get up to go home, of course, it's the end of the day (I think) and I'm going to get back to that dorm. See if I can find that red-haired chick… What was her name? Mitsuru? Yeah. She's sexy.

My pokemon trainer senses are tingling!!!

That means there's another trainer looking right at me! I MUST BATTLE!!!

But it seems he has no intention of battling. Disappointing. I really need to level up my Wigglytuff. He is glaring at me though. And suddenly! Approaches! And speaks.

"S'up, d00d?!"

Anyone would stare as blankly as I did. "Dee Zero Zero Dee…?"

Was that some new type of pokemon? Senses… Urging… Must… Catch 'em all! I could see that he wore his special brand pokeball on his breast pocket. Like a pin. But not. Because it's a pokeball. I bet that the Dee-Zero-Zero-Dee is in there! That pokeball right there! When he's not looking I shall snatch it! AND IT SHALL BE MINE.

Ahem. Calm.

"What? That's not what I said. Dude, get with the program!"

"What do you want?"

"Hey! Don't be like that! I just wanted to introduce myself! I'm Junpei Iori, and in here's my pokemon Jigglypuff!"

HAH! He says it with such pride! LITTLE DOES HE KNOW, that my Wigglytuff totally pwnz his Jigglypuff. At night. In a room. Er. Wait. No. Don't go there.

Restrain. Laughter. Monotonous voice engaged. "Minato Fagfa. Is my name. I command a Wigglytuff."

"What?! A Wigglytuff!? No way!!" Junpei says, admiration and jealously clear in his tone. Oh yes. He wanted my Wigglytuff just as badly as his Jigglypuff did.

"Did I just hear someone say… Wigglytuff?" The female, Yukari Takeba, rudely interrupts our manly conversation.

"Go away." I said, keeping the monotone, but Junpei in his excitement speaks over me. Damnit.

"S'right! He's got a Wigglytuff all to himself! Man…" Junpei sighed, closing his eyes for dramatic effect, "…I wish my Jigglypuff would evolve into one of those."

"Badass." I respond.

"I just got an Igglybuff!" Yukari squeals in joy, like that's something to be proud of. Hah. Obviously she knows nothing about pokemon. "Like. We should totally get them together for a tea party sometime!"

My expression of revulsion mimics Junpei's, only I'm sexier. He speaks, his tone rising a few octaves in disgust, "What the hell Yuka-tan?! Are you stunned!? We… we don't do that with our pokemon!"

"And my Wigglytuff's a guy. Thanks." I add, to help emphasize the point of tea parties not equalling fun and joy and battles and laughter and hot guys.

Yukari merely sighs, missing our revulsion entirely as she indulges in her girlish fantasies of pokemon and tea… and yuri. "I wouldn't expect boys like you to understand."

"What?! You got a problem with us?!" Junpei protests, he likes boys just us much as I do. Hey there Junpei~ 3

Wait. Ew. Not my type.

"Um, Yes." Yukari responds like it's the most obvious thing in the world, and little does she know that the majority of the student population doesn't actually realize she's homosexual. They're too busy staring at her butt and boobs to be bothered with listening to anything she says.

"Dude! You into girls now, Yuka-tan?!" Junpei catches on, earning a gold star sticker and a pat on the back from yours truly.

"Agh. Whatever. Let's head back to the dorm, Minato." Yukari sighs yet again, with a pointed look in my direction.

And thus my first day ends, I return to the dorm, and barricade myself in my room. I don't want Yukari to get in tonight. She seems to believe that I'm a flat-chested female, I suppose I ought to cut my hair… Or perhaps show off my assets. Oh… but what if she thinks it's a strap on…? I will devise a plan, but now, I must give Wigglytuff a bath, in my sink. For I'm terrified to step into the hall, in the case that Yukari might try to molest me.

Oh where is my savoir Mitsuru?!