Short and funny little thing I wrote between struggling with chapters on Solo Mission. Icould continue but it might be better to focus on one thing at a time. Thoughts?

Thanks for reading!

Raph savored the pop snap of the top of his fifth beer, legs dangling off the roof lazily as Casy sat next to him in companionable silence. It was a nice time of the night, they had bashed in a few muggers skulls earlier in the evening but now as the city settled in to the deepest part of the darkness it was quiet.

Raph leaned back and looked at the sky, then sighed moodily. "What ish it?" Casey asked. "Ya wouldn't understand." Raph mumbled.

"Fuck you" Casey shot back "Try me."

"Nah seriously, it's heavy and fucked up an I don't want ta get in ta it."

Casey scooped up an empty out of his impressive stack of cans and tossed it at Raph bouncing it off his shoulder. "Fuck you Raph, your heavy and fucked up an' I get you. So whats bittin' yer tail."

"Its personal." The hothead countered.

"Remember that time we were mixing it up with those purple dragons? And that one pushed me off the roof. And you caught me by my freakin' pant seat? Gave me the worst fucking wedgie of my life. Shit Red, we're beyond personal."

Raph gazed at his best friend considering, it would be good to talk to someone, anyone and he felt like this was burning a hole in him, making his temper even more corrosive then usual. "I think I'm gay." he said flatly.

Casey's eyes went wide and he leaned back slightly under the shock of the news. Then he reached up and put a very light tentative hand on Raph's shoulder and said "I'm flattered, really I am, but me an April we..."

Raph intupted him by nocking his hand back "Not you, ya vain motherfucker." he bellowed with out rancor. Casey took one look at his face and doubled over laughing. "oh thank god" Casey wheezed in between fits of giggles.

"Yeah, yuck it up asshole." but Raph grinned back good naturedly it seemed like this wasn't going to cause a serious rift in their friendship.

"Soooo" Casey drawed as he finaly straitened. "Which one?"

"Which one what?" Raph regarded him nurvously, wondering if Casey had worked out the heart of his dilemma from these scant clues.

"Well" Casey studied him imperiously as he cracked another cold one "You ain't the type for idol speculation." he took a quick swing "An you don't know that many people either." he stared at Raph for a long second letting the unspoken hang in the air.

"Your takin' this aweful well." Raph side tracked.

"It's not the first time ish come up, had a chance to adjust ta it already." Casey's short explanation explained little.

"Come up?" Raph prompted "When the fuck would something like that come up?"

Casey took another hard swallow, draining the can "Heard April an' Don talking once." he tossed the empty over his shoulder and in landed in the pile with a light clink. "He called ish the 'bio-biologicackl imperative to mate in a specish wi' only four members.' Somin' like dat." Casey slurred.

"Hmmm" Raphael mused "Donnie always to sharp for his own good. Makes sense he might get there first."

Casey, not to be derailed nudged Raph "Is it Donnie? You'd be cute together."

Raph shifted and sighed, circling his arms around his bent knee "Donnie is cute, olive skin, big doe eyes, could of been Donnie, but it isn't."

"Mikey? Lots a fun, so much energy." Casey made a gesture above his lap that vaguely mimicked a pogo stick.

Raph rolled his eyes "Not Mikey."

Casey snapped his head in Raph's direction, he opened his mouth, shut it, then opened it again. Then it's... Well shit."

Raph drew up a knee, and leaned his chin against it. "Yup."

"Are you sure it couldn't be Donnie?" Casey mused softly

Raph sighed "It can't be Don, because it just isn't. I don't feel like I got a choice in this, it's him. I don't want it ta be him, but it just is."

They looked over the city in silence for a while each pondering Raph's statement.

"So how ya gonna tell 'im?" Casey spoke up after long moments.

"I ain't." Raph said simply, uncoiling his arms and kicking his leg back out over the ledge.

"What? You can't just leave things like thish." Casey's slurred voice rose with argument. "Can't tell him, told ya, it's more than enough." Raph insisted. "No, ya gotta tell 'im and it should be tonight, inertia an' all that." Casey pushed back.

"Can't, he'll kick my ass, wipe the floor with me an never speak to me again. We hardly talk with things the way things are now." Raph shook his head. "And I jus' can't."

"Donn you worry, Ah got s-somfin for dat." As he wobbled down the fire escape and disappeared in to his window.

He came back up with an armful of bottles. "What ja want?"

"Don't know what ya got." Raph spun various labels to face him. Most of a bottle of redemption high rye, he noted- that was tempting but he stopped as he picked up a stout bottle sealed in black wax. "Shit Case if ya had a bottle of Hudson whiskey why we drinkin'?" he gestured with his beer a little sloshing over the top. "Cuz it's for a 'special occasion, an' nows special." the currently unmasked vigilante replied.

"Special 'cuz I told you I was gay? Frikin' sap."

"Nah" Casey shook his head emphatically "Special 'cuz your going to tell Leo yer gay."

Raph's eyes widened "No way Case, ain't none of these bottles gonna make me able to do that."

Casey grinned broadly "Then how about ill lill bit of eash?"

"Shouldn't mix" Raph said firmly.

"Were not mixing, ish all alcohol." Casey grinned unevenly. "Any ya need a lill' bit ah liquid courage, kick your ass in ta gear ya pussie."

"Fuck it, can't be any worse then how it is now." Raph uncapped a bottle and took a swig, enjoying the fire and the complex smoke and leather flavor.

From there on, the evening got a little disjointed. With Casey egging him on he had drank an amount of alcohol lethal to some humans and probably not much better for most turtles.

Casey escorted him back to a manhole close to the lair giving him an extremely slurred pep talk on the way. They had paused as Raph got ready to decent and Casey swept his best friend up in a fierce hug. "Good luck fuckface." his hot alcohol breath washing over him in a rare moment of closeness. "Fucking sap." Raph muttered back but his eyes stung with hot tears and he had to blink several times to clear them.

The walk through the tunnels was uneventful, and short but even so Raphael could feel his courage flagging.

He wasn't sure if he felt terrified or elated to open the lair door to find a ticked off Leo, leaning against the back of the couch regarding him coolly.

"Waitin' up for me Fearless?" Raph called trying to sound casual and still avoid a fight.

"We didn't know where you went." Leo started voice stern.

Raph paced up to him, a little unsteady on his feet, he was determined not to turn this in to a fight, yet. But he could feel his muscles bunching with tension. "Ya know where I was. I was out, sometimes things here..." he trailed off. "I just gotta get out."

"Raph, you know you can talk to me right? About whatever this is." he gestured vaguely up and down at Raph's wobbling form.

Raphael reached out and put a hand on Leo's shoulder for suport, he also serptiously steped in closer.

"Raph you smell like a bar room floor" Leo's voice equal parts annoyance and concern.

"Shud up" he regarded Leo's worried eyes, inches from his own. His head was spinning and his stomach was a solid knot of fear, everything seemed to narrow down to those dark orbs. Their liquid lumincence in a narrow band of blue, filling his vision compleately. Raph's blood thundered in his ears. He never took is eyes off Leo's as he spoke. "I'm in love with ya'."

And then he threw up