A/N: Well, I figured that I wrote a Halloween story, I might as well write a Christmas story! Think of this story as serving as a Christmas special to the short story saga "Ned's Declassified High School Survival Guide" I'm also writing (so you might want to read a little bit of that first). I guess since NDSSG never got to do a Christmas special you could consider this the definitive Ned Christmas story (unless there are any others on this site, but I'm much too lazy to check).

Have Yourself a Neddy Little Christmas

The first few months of the school year have a mixed reaction to everyone. You either love it or hate it. But you still can't help that in the days between Halloween and Thanksgiving the one thing you can't help but anticipate even though it feels so far away and when Thanksgiving finally comes it hits you like a ton of bricks the next day: the Christmas holiday season. Ned Bigby was always one to try and bring the Christmas spirit to everyone he could. Even if it was something as subtle as wearing a Santa hat to school or even going as far as to bring a fake mini Christmas tree to school to put on his desk during every class, Ned loved the holidays. When he heard early in the year that Michael S. Dukakis High School does a number of Christmas fundraisers, he jumped at the opportunity as soon as the time came. For years, every school year round Christmastime, Dukakis does an annual fundraiser: selling holiday wreaths. Since Mr. Mosely got tenure in 1984, he had been the head if the wreath sales. It is always one of his favorite times of the school year; it surprised him that he's worked the wreath sales so long. Back in 1984, he was married a little over two years and had no kids, next thing you know you have two kids and you've been married for 23 years and you've been teaching at the same exact school in the same exact classroom for 26. A few days after the Thanksgiving weekend, Mr. Mosely made an announcement on the loudspeaker during homeroom to inform the students if they wanted to sell wreaths to meet in his classroom after school.

As soon as the last bell rang, Ned darted to the classroom. Usually only 20 students sign up to sell wreaths and it wasn't too different this year. Only a few freshmen signed up to sell wreaths, just him, Lisa and Coconut Head signed up to sell wreaths… so he thought.

"Wejust need to wait a few more minutes to see if anybody else shows up." Mr. Mosely said and Moze came into the room.

"Hi, daddy," Moze said hugging her dad and sitting down next to Ned.

"I guess you're obligated to sell wreaths." Ned whispered to her.

"Not necessary, my dad wants me to sell but I still…"

"Okay, so, here we go: the 2007 wreath sale." Mr. Mosely began. "Every year, as we have for years, we ask you students who come to sell holiday wreaths to help raise money for school events within the next couple months. We're ordering 1,000 wreaths to sell; you are required to sell 25 wreaths. I understand that we'll be left with extras but if we sell a majority of the wreaths, we'll have enough money to pay for the lights at the football games and for set building for the school plays and all that jazz. So, you can take your sales books on the way out, put your names down and I'll see you all next week to see how many wreaths you've sold."

Mr. Mosely gave everybody their sales books. Ned and Moze walked down the hall.

"So how many do you think you'll sell?" Ned asked.

"Who knows really? Every year it changes for everybody."

"Well," Ned stuck out his hand, "may the best man win."

Moze cleared her throat.

"May the best salesperson win." They shook hands.

I know it's abnormally short, but its 11:47pm on December 1, 2007 as I type this and I want to get it up by midnight so I still have 24 days to write.

Next time: Where the hell is Cookie? We'll find out. And how are Ned and Moze going to do competing with each other in wreath sales? And what will they get each other for Christmas? Next chapter posted some point next week.