1. AFTER THE FIRE
Remus looked at the wreckage that once was his best friend's home, his love's home, his nephew's home, his home. He gazed over the destruction with a gaping face--how could Sirius have done this? Remus never thought Sirius was capable of such madness--betraying and murdering his best friends and working in league with one of the malicious wizards of all time. The thought of actions of this color from Sirius never even swam in Remus' head.
"Although, there was that one night that he betrayed me." Remus thought
"But he promised that he would never hurt me or any of us again." he rebutled.
After staring at the debris for two hours, but what seemed like a century, Remus turned and walked away with burning tears in his eyes.
Remus sat around his flat in London, if that heap of junk even merited that title. He was alone. He sat there day after day feeling more irritated as time drew toward the next full moon. Remus sat in his apartment on the pile of sheets that he called a bed recounting the deaths of his family. First it was his father, killed by the same maniac that gave him his lycanthropy. Then it was his mother, who was murdered by the unstoppable villain breast cancer. Now Lily, James and Peter were gone. Sirius seemed dead to him as well.
Who was left for him? Dumbledore kept on pestering Remus with letters claiming that Harry, Lily and James' son, still needed him. Harry needed Remus to remind him of his family because they were gone for him too. But Remus knew better, Harry was safe with his muggle relatives.
Remus wasted the days away drinking and sleeping. Until it was finally the full moon. This time, his pack was gone and Remus knew that he was going to have a bad night—one that perhaps he could not take care of himself for. For the first time since his first transformation, he spent the full moon in a cage in St. Mungos. He knew that they did not give optimal care for werewolves during the full moon, but he was well aware that afterwards they provided all of the healing that they could offer. He would need it because Lily and James' funeral happened to be three day after.
"Hello Mr. Lupin. Can I see your license and registration?"
He felt like he was a driver that was caught doing 80 in a 20 zone. He grudgingly rummaged through his overnight bag and pulled out his wallet. He showed the nurse the card and parchment he received when he was four years old. He remembered his father telling him to never lose it. These papers marked and documented him forever as a magical beast and werewolf. She looked at them briefly and then looked pleased with herself.
"Right this way sir."
She led him down a long, white corridor. At first there were many healers and nurses and patients bustling around for all sorts of difference reasons. As they continued to walk further down, there were fewer and fewer people. At last she lead him to a room with two cages and two hospital beds in it.
"Please undress and put this gown on sir, someone will be with you shortly." And with that, she left him with nothing but a plastic hospital gown and an empty room.
He did as he was told; took off his clothes and got a good look at his body full of scars. He stared down at himself, amazed at what he did to himself with no restraint. After tracing carefully his very first scar—his bite scar—his popped back into reality and promptly put his gown on.
He sat on the bed, his feet freezing, waiting for that "someone" to walk in. A man with black curly hair finally pushed open the door and greeted him.
"Hi, I'm Theodore Ulrin and I will be helping you with your transformation today."
"It's not the transforming I need help with." Remus hissed under his breath.
Catching what Remus had said, the man responded, "Sir, you have checked yourself into our care. I will have you cooperate or I will be made to use force." As he said this he pulled a brick of silver out of his jacked pocket. Remus perked up at the sight of this and did not speak unless spoken to for the remainder of the visit to the hospital.
Remus was bombarded with medical questions, "Do you have AIDS? Do you have a history of Cancer? Did your father exhibit male pattern baldness?" Remus responded quickly and emotionlessly; he just wanted this hell to be over. It was incredibly hard to resist the urge to use violence or to snap at the man—it was so close to the full moon now that Remus was struggling for control from the wolf inside.
The man gave him a quick physical and then looked at his watch.
"My, my. Would you look at the time." He shook his head and pointed at his watch. "Its almost an hour until the full moon. Would you please step into this cell now." The man walked over to one of the cages and opened the door. "I know it's a little early, but better safe than sorry, yes?"
Remus fought the urge of shoving the man into the cage and instead reluctantly walked in. The inside was much different than the outside. He could smell pee and blood dried on the floor. There were scratch and bite marks covering the cage's iron bars.
Remus layed down on the cold cell floor and watched the clock on the wall outside the cage. It was eleven-thirty and Remus was already feeling the first pangs of the transformation. He knew this truly was going to be a rough night.
The wolf took over. He smelt a lot of things--humans, medicines, other animals but he couldn't smell the thing that he wanted to smell the most; he couldn't smell his pack.
Remus awoke to a bright light hanging immediately above his face. He tried to sit up felt a sharp pain down his side. He turned his head to see what damage was done to find himself covered in bruses and bandages.
"Why, Mr. Lupin, you're awake!" A cheery voice across the room shouted. A girl popped up in front of his line of sight. She looked young, no older than 25, and she had the rosiest cheeks that he had ever seen. "And it only took you two days to wake up!" She chuckled as she checked some of his bandages.
"I'll tell you Mr. Lupin, I've never seen a worse transformation. Hopefully next time you'll be used to the cages and it will go smoother."
Although Remus couldn't say anything, from the look on his face she knew that he was not coming back to the hospital for transformations.
He was hesitantly allowed to leave the hospital that night. He wasn't as healed as he had hoped but he was healed enough to go to the funeral.
It was bright and sunny on the day of the funeral, which was held in the backyard of Lily and James' house. Remus had to support himself with a crutch because one of his legs was still healing from the previous moon. He looked awful.
After the ceremony, when everyone had gone into a tent for the reception, Remus stood gaping at the two graves that lie before him. There was his best mate, the man who was always there for him. There was his love, the only person in the world that made him feel totally human.
He heard a faint cry behind him and awoke from his daze. There was little Harry, not even a year old, alone and curled up in a ball crying in front of his parents' graves. The shattering of Remus' heart could then be heard from England to China. He scooped Harry up in his bloody hands and held him in his arms tightly.
"We'll figure this out Harry" Remus whispered.
Just then, a pregnant Petunia, who was not very happy with the idea of raising her freaky sister's child, ran out of the tent.
"You! Put that child down!" Remus, startled a little by her shrieking voice, calmly put Harry back where he found him. Petunia violently picked him up and huffed away back into the tent. Remus was left all alone.
Three weeks later, Remus was forced out of his apartment because he refused to try to find a job. Even if he wanted one, the likely hood of getting one for someone with his condition was small. James and Lily would usually give him a little monetary help when he was having trouble finding a job. But Remus did not have drive anymore. He found no point in eating or working or even getting out of bed. He resorted to living on the streets. He was not cold or malnerished--at least he didn't think so. He was unconscience half the time because of his excessive drinking. The next full moon was approaching and Remus didn't care anymore. He knew it would be another bad transformation because his pack wasn't there. But he didn't care enough to go to the hospital or even find a container for himself. That full moon, he let himself go.
On the night of the full moon, Remus walked deep into a nearby forest. He found a clearing that he hoped no one knew about. He transformed there--free in the forest, The wolf went crazy.
The wolf was roaming through the woods in the dead of night when it caught the scent of a human. It followed the path of the scent until it came to a lone car in the middle of the woods. The wolf's mouth filled with foam at just the thought of finally gulping down some human meat. The wolf walked up to the car and circled in on it. There were two humans. A man and a woman. The car was steamed up from the inside and the wolf heard moaning noises coming from the back seat. The wolf smirked at how easy this would be--they were obviously very distracted at the moment.
The wolf snuck up to one side of the car. He heard a twig break from under him. How could he be so stupid as to let his hunger get the best of him and reveal his presence to the humans. The shaking and noises stopped. The wolf stood as still as a tree for a moment, waiting for the couple to resume what they were doing.
Suddenly, a car door shot open and the wolf saw green lights flying toward him. He fell to the hard ground and through the blood in his eyes, he watched the car speed away.
"What's that?" A child asked with innosense in her voice as she pointed toward a pile of extra red snow in the woods.
"I don't know, let's check it out." Replied woman holding the child's hand. The woman was young--20 or so--with long red hair.
"Oh my god! Its a person! Its alive. Help me get it up Claire." The child and the woman carried the person home.